OLAADEGBU:


I also learnt that some wives have been brought up in abusive families hence they get used to being abused by their husbands and this is not right especially if they claim to be Christians. No wonder kids of nowadays are discouraged from getting married.

Kids of nowadays are just being kids. That's why most of them will end up getting married real late.

Victorakats:


Physical Abuse is a Legitimate Ground for Divorce!
No religion supports physical abuse!

The only religion that I know encourages the beating of their wives is Islam, no?

Victorakats:


And the Law doesn't encourage physical abuse!
If anyone is in a physically abused marriage and he or she have explored every healthy and necessary avenues to reconcile with his or her partner, and they failed, the person has a legitimate right to seek for divorce.
Divorce is legal and Biblical!

Can you show us from Scriptures how divorce is biblical?

Victorakats:


Divorce is reversible, Death is Not!

How is divorce reversible?

Victorakats:


The God that ordained marriage didn't encourage partners to take the lives of their beloved!!!

Thank you!!!

www.amaraofficial.com

It rather commands husbands to lay down their lives for their wives, can you?

emerged01:


I hate abusive relationship. I can't stand it.

It should not be tolerated it should rather be reported to the necessary authorities.

OLAADEGBU:
You seem to bask in the fact that the Bible does not allow for divorce hence you think that an abusive relationship is permissible.

Are you irretrievably dull ? What you wrote up there is akin to saying "my bank doesn't allow overdrafts, therefore it's ok to steal" . Let me ask you - does the bible permit or condone abuse?

OLAADEGBU:
What should happen where there is no reconciliation, remorse or healing?

You persist. If you desist, you remain happy to be separated - their is no divorce, and separation (and even if you forcefully claim divorce), does not grant one leave to re-marry. Else both the remarrying spouse and the person they enter into a sham union with are committing adultery . All simple and clear from the scriptures .

OLAADEGBU:
Do people deliberately get into abusive marriages? How do they prevent getting into abusive marriages?

Refer to your BIBLE - Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth (and while one is still on it) . There are no abusive marriages, only abusive people . Don't marry them and your marriage won't be abusive. Learner .

OLAADEGBU:
Where did I say that I am campaigning for divorce? It is you that I should be accusing of condoning abuse.

Not only are you campaigning for Christian divorce, you are also blaspheming and adding/subtracting from the scriptures.

You are arguing that divorce is scripturally permmisable. If divorce is permmisable, then serial divorce is permmisable. If divorce is allowed then the scripture is broken

1 Corinthians 7:39 - A wife is bound as long as her husband lives; but if her husband is dead, she is free to be married to whom she wishes...

Romans 7 - 1 Do you not know, brothers and sisters—for I am speaking to those who know the law—that the law has authority over someone only as long as that person lives? 2 For example, by law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law that binds her to him. 3 So then, if she has sexual relations with another man while her husband is still alive, she is called an adulteress. But if her husband dies, she is released from that law and is not an adulteress if she marries another man.


Your audience are the cohort of divorcees and people with "bend down and pick spouses". They are here talking about how the bible can be interpreted in "different ways" - as if covetousness, theft, lies and adultery are ambiguous .

OLAADEGBU:
There is emotional abuse, physical abuse, financial abuse, spiritual abuse and so on. If the abusive spouse refuses that the abused be separated what should they do, remain?

You have categorised 4+ types of abuse - at what degree of abuse is divorce scriptural for each (and any other you care to mention) category. Who decides how much? Is it subjective, or is there some objective rule?

We are not in deep waters yet and you already appear to be panicking . Well, at least you'll have big audiences of seeker type religionists who live to have their feelings tickled and wicked ways validated. Awon oni "itching ears"


TV

Any woman managing a physically abusive relationship, simply has nothing to live for.

Muafrika2:


He would stay alive longer at least. Though am not so sure being the hopeless drunkard that he was.

Who knows whether it was the wife's emotional abuse that pushed him into being inebriated.

Timbuktou:


Do you think it would be ok for a man to divorce Jo's wife over emotional abuse?

No.

TV01:


Gracias sir..seems he's back for more .


TV

It is easy to identify serial abusers.

OLAADEGBU:
It is easy to identify serial abusers.

Chapter and verse please - or find your level


TV

OLAADEGBU:


Who knows whether it was the wife's emotional abuse that pushed him into being inebriated.

Possible.

OLAADEGBU:


No.

But you do for physical abuse. I mean, we do know emotional abuse could well lead to HBP and ultimately. So, you're against violent deaths but not quieter ones? After all, HBP has been referred to as the silent killer.

Juzzybabe:
Any woman managing a physically abusive relationship, simply has nothing to live for.

Interesting thought. What would you say about men who manage an emotionally and verbally abusive one, though?

OLAADEGBU:
Does an abused wife have to stay with her husband?

OLAADEGBU:
There is emotional abuse, physical abuse, financial abuse, spiritual abuse and so on.

OLAADEGBU:
Emotional abuse in often underrated. It is sometimes worse than physical abuse.

Timbuktou:
Do you think it would be ok for a man to divorce Jo's wife over emotional abuse?

OLAADEGBU:
No.

Timbuktou:
But you do for physical abuse. I mean, we do know emotional abuse could well lead to HBP and ultimately. So, you're against violent deaths but not quieter ones? After all, HBP has been referred to as the silent killer.

See logic fail – Emotional abuse (usually by women) is as bad as physical abuse (usually by men), but women are allowed to divorce for physical abuse(contrary to scripture), but men are not.

See policy fail – divorce is permissable for abuse (of which there are numerous types), but at what level of abuse (for individual categories or universally) is not clear? Is it subjective, or is there an objective measure?

Olaadegbu are you a feminist - your shoddy logic & ill-formulated policy would suggest so


TV

This thread should be captioned OLAADEGBU vs TV01...

TV01 is winning convincingly at the moment.

*following

TV01:












See logic fail – Emotional abuse (usually by women) is as bad as physical abuse (usually by men), but women are allowed to divorce for physical abuse(contrary to scripture), but men are not.

See policy fail – divorce is permissable for abuse (of which there are numerous types), but at what level of abuse (for individual categories or universally) is not clear? Is it subjective, or is there an objective measure?

Olaadegbu are you a feminist - your shoddy logic & ill-formulated policy would suggest so


TV

Me, I don't undertand all this o. I'd like Olaadegbu to explain why it's ok for one set of people to flee abuse and it's not ok for others.

OLAADEGBU:


The other religion accepts physical abuse of their wives as a way of life and this has filtered down into the Nigerian culture. So called Christians are quick to claim the command of no divorce but they shirk their responsibilities to love and to cherish.

Exactly!

Juzzybabe:
Any woman managing a physically abusive relationship, simply has nothing to live for.

Profound.

OLAADEGBU:


God commands the husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church synagogue. Is that not more than loving yourself?

Fixed.

OLAADEGBU:


What is marital infidelity? Is it a biblical ground for divorce?

Marital infidelity is sexual immorality/unfaithfulness in marriage. And I think its the only ground for divorce recognized by Jesus Christ while he was physically on earth.

But I say that a man who divorces his wife, unless
she has been unfaithful, causes her to commit
adultery. And anyone who marries a divorced
woman also commits adultery.
- Matthew 5:32 (New Living Translation)

thesicilian:

Marital infidelity is sexual immorality/unfaithfulness in marriage. And I think its the only ground for divorce recognized by Jesus Christ while he was physically on earth.

But I say that a man who divorces his wife, unless
she has been unfaithful, causes her to commit
adultery. And anyone who marries a divorced
woman also commits adultery.
- Matthew 5:32 (New Living Translation)

This may appear to be the case at first glance, but look at parallel scriptures;

Matthew 19:9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.

Mark 10:11 And he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her.

Luke 16:18 Whosoever putteth away his wife, and marrieth another, committeth adultery: and whosoever marrieth her that is put away from her husband committeth adultery.

If these verses in Mark & Luke are to be believed - and they are - divorcing a woman and remarrying makes one an adulterer. Along with the divorced spouse if they should marry another.

Luke and Mark seemingly contradict Matthew 5:32 & 19:9, or at least says that even if you divorce your wife for infidelity, you cannot remarry, and neither can she. So again;

Matthew 5:32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

Matthew 1:18-19 Now the birth of Jesus Christ was on this wise: When as his mother Mary was espoused to Joseph, before they came together, she was found with child of the Holy Ghost. Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not willing to make her a publick example, was minded to put her away privily.

The seeming exception in Matthew was due to what we see in chapter 1. Joseph was espoused (betrothed to Mary), it was not a consummated marriage, even though he was called her husband - "before they came together" - it's why paternity was not in question - for ordinary Joe anyway .

He was putting away a fiancee, not a wife. Both parts of the transaction were considered binding, but voiding could occur at the betrothal stage (prior to consummation) if "fornication", note it was not "adultery", was proven. They were considered husband and wife at both stages.

In todays terms we say better a broken engagement. There was no concept of dating or loosely engaged. Biblically, after consummation, marriage is until death do part - hence this saying by the disciples;

Matthew 19:10 - His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry.

That's bible, it can be hard,, so take it or leave it. But please stop trying to interject worldly morés to make it more palatable to those who cannot receive it .


TV
^{...Olaadegbu, please stop prating about divorce for abuse - it's not there.}

Consistent physical abuse is a ground for divorce in my dictionary any time any day.

soonest:
Consistent physical abuse is a ground for divorce in my dictionary any time any day.

Anyone who respects himself/herself thinks so.

“Have the courage to use your own reason- That is the motto of enlightenment.
"Foundations of the Metaphysics of
Morals" (1785)”

Timbuktou:


Interesting thought. Why would you say about men who manage an emotionally and verbally abusive one, though?

My point of view, (either men or women) you can easily live with verbal abuse and get over emotional abuse but one might not Survive physical abuse. People who manages physical abuse in marriages/relationships just to break the record, always leave us with their tale to serve as a lesson while they are either gone,or damaged beyond repairs.

soonest:
Consistent physical abuse is a ground for divorce in my dictionary any time any day.

Consistent abuse you say? Wow!

Juzzybabe:


My point of view, (either men or women) you can easily live with verbal abuse and get over emotional abuse but one might not Survive physical abuse. People who manages physical abuse in marriages/relationships just to break the record, always leave us with their tale to serve as a lesson while they are either gone,or damaged beyond repairs.

So, what you're saying is emotional abuse causes or leaves no harm on the victim? It's just water off a duck's back. Got it.

soonest:
Consistent physical abuse is a ground for divorce in my dictionary any time any day.

So, a headbutt or drop kick once every few years is cool?

TV01:












See logic fail – Emotional abuse (usually by women) is as bad as physical abuse (usually by men), but women are allowed to divorce for physical abuse(contrary to scripture), but men are not.

See policy fail – divorce is permissable for abuse (of which there are numerous types), but at what level of abuse (for individual categories or universally) is not clear? Is it subjective, or is there an objective measure?

Olaadegbu are you a feminist - your shoddy logic & ill-formulated policy would suggest so


TV

He's a very confused fellow.

soonest:
Consistent physical abuse is a ground for divorce in my dictionary any time any day.

Any kind of abuse physical or otherwise should be a ground for divorce if we are been fair.

thesicilian:

Marital infidelity is sexual immorality/unfaithfulness in marriage. And I think its the only ground for divorce recognized by Jesus Christ while he was physically on earth.

But I say that a man who divorces his wife, unless
she has been unfaithful, causes her to commit
adultery. And anyone who marries a divorced
woman also commits adultery.
- Matthew 5:32 (New Living Translation)

Hello,if you read the entire chapter of Mathew 5 you will understand that almost everyone of us will go to hell one way or the other.
There are no TRUE Christians anymore as far as am concerned and if there are,its too few.

TV01:

Are you irretrievably dull ? What you wrote up there is akin to saying "my bank doesn't allow overdrafts, therefore it's ok to steal" . Let me ask you - does the bible permit or condone abuse?


You persist. If you desist, you remain happy to be separated - their is no divorce, and separation (and even if you forcefully claim divorce), does not grant one leave to re-marry. Else both the remarrying spouse and the person they enter into a sham union with are committing adultery . All simple and clear from the scriptures .


Refer to your BIBLE - Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth (and while one is still on it) . There are no abusive marriages, only abusive people . Don't marry them and your marriage won't be abusive. Learner .

Not only are you campaigning for Christian divorce, you are also blaspheming and adding/subtracting from the scriptures.

You are arguing that divorce is scripturally permmisable. If divorce is permmisable, then serial divorce is permmisable. If divorce is allowed then the scripture is broken

1 Corinthians 7:39 - A wife is bound as long as her husband lives; but if her husband is dead, she is free to be married to whom she wishes...

Romans 7 - 1 Do you not know, brothers and sisters—for I am speaking to those who know the law—that the law has authority over someone only as long as that person lives? 2 For example, by law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law that binds her to him. 3 So then, if she has sexual relations with another man while her husband is still alive, she is called an adulteress. But if her husband dies, she is released from that law and is not an adulteress if she marries another man.


Your audience are the cohort of divorcees and people with "bend down and pick spouses". They are here talking about how the bible can be interpreted in "different ways" - as if covetousness, theft, lies and adultery are ambiguous .


You have categorised 4+ types of abuse - at what degree of abuse is divorce scriptural for each (and any other you care to mention) category. Who decides how much? Is it subjective, or is there some objective rule?

We are not in deep waters yet and you already appear to be panicking . Well, at least you'll have big audiences of seeker type religionists who live to have their feelings tickled and wicked ways validated. Awon oni "itching ears"


TV

You quote the Bible a lot for someone who likes to bully, insult, and talk down on women,is this the Christian way?

OLAADEGBU:


You only remember love when the wify is about leaving you. Where was this love when you were busy slapping and abusing each other?

In your child-like fantasy, couples will never argue nor fight. The day they do they are no longer in love. Childish thinking.
We are all imperfect human beings and times will come when we can't stand one another. It is at times like that that a mature love will take you through the rough patches.

Love does not love because the other loves back. Love loves unconditionally
I won't be surprised if u don't understand this.

OP

When your wife is a bad cook that is also some form of abuse
When your husband snores that is also one form of abuse
When your wife spends lavishly that is one for of abuse
When your husband doesnt make enough money that is also some form of abuse
When sexx with your wife/husband is no longer good or frequent, that is also abuse
When they partner press toothpaste from the middle thats also an abusive behavior

All these and more are grounds for divorce