Chapter Five

Pax
A week in the hospital is one f**king week too long. That much is certain.
I slowly curl up out of my pillows and sit perched on the edge of my bed. I wince a bit as the movement disturbs a cracked rib and I try to take shallow breaths so that it doesn’t hurt. The chest compressions from the paramedics did a number on my ribcage. I know they were trying to save my life, but shit. Did they have to crack four ribs?
Fuckers.
As I wait for the pain to settle and for my eyes to adjust to the light of day, I stare out the windows at the large lake that looms in front of me.
Lake Michigan is huge and vast and gray, and my loft-style home is perched above it on the edge of a bluff. Each room facing the lake has floor to ceiling windows so I have a good view no matter where I’m at. And I neverworry about who might be walking on the beach below and might see me walking na**d through my house. It’s my private beach. If anyone is trespassing, they deserve to see my ball-sack.
I reach for the vial on my nightstand, wincing again.
Running my thumb around the metal rim of the lid, I absently let my mind wander as I try to clear the blur of sleep from my head. And then I give up on that and dump a little white pill into my hand, something to help me with that process because I’m too impatient to wait.
I’m slacking off the other stuff for a while, though. Regardless of what my father thinks, I don’t need to take it. I’m not a f**king addict. And since it’s not fun to get my stomach pumped and my ribs pummeled, I think I’ll refrain from that particular activity for a while.
I knock the pill back with a swig of water from my nightstand, ignoring the fact that I wish it was beer. It’s only 11:00 a.m. and I’ve decided that I’m not going to drink until 5:00 p.m. on any given day and I’m not going to have any of that “It’s 5:00 somewhere” bullshit. I’m not a f**king pu**y. Regardless of popular opinion, I can restrain myself when I want to.
I stumble from my bed, stretch as carefully as I can and make my way into the bathroom, stepping down into my shower.
My shower is one of my favorite things about this house. It’s a huge tiled expanse, completely ensconced in stone and has four shower heads hitting me from all different directions. It was custom made to fit my tall body because I hate having to duck down to get clean. There’s room for a party in here, if I wanted. And I have had many a party in this very shower with groups of willing women.
The memories of those bare, wet br**sts and long thighs all crowded into this very shower makes me instantly hard and I slather soap in my palms before I take things into my own hands.
As I do, Mila’s face appears in my head. It’s unexpected and sudden, but I focus on it, on her soft voice and full tits as I take care of business. I close my eyes and pretend that my hand is hers. I picture her soft skin, sliding against mine. I picture slamming her against the wet shower wall and f**king her until she screams my name, all while her legs are wrapped around my waist.
It doesn’t take long until I am finished.
With a satisfied sigh, I wash myself and grab a thick towel, drying off gently. And I’m still thinking about Mila Hill. What the f**k?
On the one hand, I suppose it’s normal. She did save my life, after all. And for the life of me, I can’t remember if I thanked her. Normally, I wouldn’t give a shit, but there is something about her that makes me think about things that I normally wouldn’t. Something soft and sweet, something real and genuine.
And now I’m acting like a f**king pu**y.
I grab a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and pull them on.
I’m going to put this to rest right now. I’ll simply ask around and find out where she works, tell her thank you and get on with my life. She definitely isn’t the kind of person that I should invest time in. There’s no way that my lifestyle or my personality would ever please her, not in the long run. And I’m not in the business of changing myself for anyone.
As I jam the key into my car, I think about her again, how the dark red shirt that she wore the other day was pulled so tautly across her perky, full boobs. It makes me wonder what they look like naked. Her ni**les are probably pink and tilted toward the sky. My dick gets hard again.
F*ck.
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