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What God Does For A Living (Yahweh's True Profession) - Religion (2) - Nairaland

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Re: What God Does For A Living (Yahweh's True Profession) by oaroloye(m): 8:26pm On Mar 14, 2017
SHALOM!

Yahweh God gives Life by His Word of Power.
Re: What God Does For A Living (Yahweh's True Profession) by blueAgent(m): 9:02pm On Mar 14, 2017
realmindz:
Yaweh protects people for a living. He is an insurer, a counsellor, comforter and giver in times of needs.

Hurray! can't you see Yaweh is so good to us.

You need not to ever worry of ANYTHING IN LIFE, all you need to do is simply ssubscribe to Yahweh's services and you and your loved ones will never know needs nor suffer any calamity.

TERMS AND CONDITIONS (YAHWEH & SONS ENTERPRISES

You will be guaranteed for life if only you abide by these terms and conditions:

1. COMMISSION AND FEES: This is non-negotiable, 10% to be paid monthly on monthly income. A list is sent to yaweh every month of those who have paid and those with outstanding obligations, debtors shall be disconnected immediately from the services without consideration of past payments until all dues are cleared.

2. YOU WON'T NEED ANY OF THESE ANYMORE:
a. Car insurance
b. life insurance
c.. Health insurance etc

Going for worldly insurance policies is a total display of lack of faith in "Yaweh and Sons Enterprises" and shall be considered a breach of contract.

3. APPRECIATION
This is very key to sustain the contract, you MUST show daily appreciation and shower praises to the CEO every minute and every day for every fortune encountered and miraculous events enjoyed.

4. DISCLAIMER: As against No. 4, for every bad luck encountered and calamity suffered, the devil and you are solely responsible. However, you must still shower praises to the CEO for limiting damages suffered to a considerable level.

5. MONOPOLY: complementing No.1 and 2, Please note the Yaweh & Sons Enterprises have the patent right of protection. On no condition should you ever subscribe to any other policy.
Subscribing to Yaweh's services is out of freewill, however, Yaweh shall send the devourers to devour those who are yet to be convinced about our services.

We hope you enjoy our services, Yaweh and Sons Enterprises, a sure gaurantee to living a good life.

ABOUT YAWEH
Yaweh started from a humble beginning as he started with nothing, he relocated from space about some billions of years ago 6000 years ago. He started his career on earth by creating the whole universe and planet earth, then he created his employees who are also his clients to till the soil and render monthly dues as a source of revenue.

Monthly dues use to be inform of livestocks until recent civilizations.

find out more about Yahweh in his ancient book #bible



Attention seeker .Why do you spend time composing article against a God you claim does not Exist?

Since you have discovered the light(that there is no God) are you not supposed to share your light with us,i mean write articles on Atheism and how A fish got tired of swimming and became a bird or how farting ( bigbang) lead to the existence of the whole universe ,show us chemical formular of how abiogenesis took place.write something abeg on your belief let us read and learn(laugh).....
Re: What God Does For A Living (Yahweh's True Profession) by realmindz: 9:13pm On Mar 14, 2017
blueAgent:




Attention seeker .Why do you spend time composing article against a God you claim does not Exist?

Since you have discovered the light(that there is no God) are you not supposed to share your light with us,i mean write articles on Atheism and how A fish got tired of swimming and became a bird or how farting ( bigbang) lead to the existence of the whole universe ,show us chemical formular of how abiogenesis took place.write something abeg on your belief let us read and learn(laugh).....

grin grin
Re: What God Does For A Living (Yahweh's True Profession) by FunkyMetahuman: 11:00pm On Mar 14, 2017
matrix600:
This is how life insurance is done
lol
Very funny meme
Re: What God Does For A Living (Yahweh's True Profession) by kkins25(m): 11:08pm On May 26, 2017
Funny
Re: What God Does For A Living (Yahweh's True Profession) by OtemAtum: 12:30am On May 27, 2017
kkins25:
Funny
No be small
Re: What God Does For A Living (Yahweh's True Profession) by leofab(f): 3:55am On May 27, 2017
Make I shut up

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