I recently broke up with my gf . I am still very much pissed about her wasting my time .
It boils down to finances.. she feels she doesn't have to tell me her income or anything at all relating to money.

before some of y'all call me out. I am a safety officer, I earn something average.. and I make twice my salary every month doing other stuff like music.. as u can see on my profile.

but I really do feel, couples, people seeing each other should be open about money.

I, for one, would wanna be accountable to somebody else.. if my partner is frugal, that's better.. it checkmates my frivolous spendings.

most importantly, it is amongst my criteria in my search for a new gf/fiance/wife. most definitely, it is.

any contrary opinions?

Your relationship should be at an advanced stage before disclosure of finances will come into the matter in my opinion!

babythug:
Your relationship should be at an advanced stage before disclosure of finances will come into the matter in my opinion!

that might work with folks that believe in the bf-gf thingy.

i have always been futuristic with my relationships to the point popping the question would not come as a surprise.

or are there any manuals out there that tells us when a relationship is advanced? what is the time frame? years, months?

kilokeys:


that might work with folks that believe in the bf-gf thingy.

i have always been futuristic with my relationships to the point popping the question would not come as a surprise.

or are there any manuals out there that tells us when a relationship is advanced? what is the time frame? years, months?

There no manual per se and it works differently for each couple! To me It'll be odd to discuss earnings a week after hooking up for eg except a random conversation goes down that lane!

Do you get me now??

Op.she dont want a future wt u.

If she did, u guys wud discuss the future n finances is part of it.
Gba gbe oshi!

babythug:


There no manual per se and it works differently for each couple! To me It'll be odd to discuss earnings a week after hooking up for eg except a random conversation goes down that lane!

Do you get me now??

maybe after the first sex.. except we wanna say sharing our bodies is more important than sharing info on money.

i get you though

kilokeys:
I recently broke up with my gf . I am still very much pissed about her wasting my time .
It boils down to finances.. she feels she doesn't have to tell me her income or anything at all relating to money.

before some of y'all call me out. I am a safety officer, I earn something average.. and I make twice my salary every month doing other stuff like music.. as u can see on my profile.

but I really do feel, couples, people seeing each other should be open about money.

I, for one, would wanna be accountable to somebody else.. if my partner is frugal, that's better.. it checkmates my frivolous spendings.

most importantly, it is amongst my criteria in my search for a new gf/fiance/wife. most definitely, it is.

any contrary opinions?

Openness and trust are important factors in a relationship but why do you want to know about her finances?
Have you got bills to share? Have you got a joint account?
Are you planning to move together? Get married?

If not, why do you poke your nose in matters that should not bother you at this stage of the relationship?

I agree.

But I would add that it depends on the stage of the r/ship. Any r/ship past 6 months and where YOU BOTH see a future together should involve an honest, open discussion about finances. A partner's repeated refusal to discuss it with you should raise an eyebrow.

kilokeys:

but I really do feel, couples, people seeing each other should be open about money.

Mindfulness:


Openness and trust are important factors in a relationship but why do you want to know about her finances?
Have you got bills to share? Have you got a joint account?
Are you planning to move together? Get married?

If not, why do you poke your nose in matters that should not bother you at this stage of the relationship?

In this Context

Her : I just got this job, not what i need , but i would manage

me: great news, we have to start from somewhere

her: yeah, i guess so

Me: so whats the pay like?

Her : thats not ur business, why are you concerned about how much?

me : huh?

Her : yeah, a man shouldnt be concerned about a woman's earnings

bla bla bla bla..


so guy, whats the crime in that...

In a world where we know what friends and mere acquaintances earn, it is unacceptable for a partner to hide such petty information.

It is better to hide your body, than mere figures that obviously lie in a bank account.

project4OO:
In a world where we know what friends and mere acquaintances earn, it is unacceptable for a partner to hide such petty information.

It is better to hide your body, than mere figures that obviously lie in a bank account.

even bill gate's bank account aint a secret


is just unbelievable.. an ordinary question became a deal breaker.

I think our dating game needs to change in Nigeria esp

we profess love before ''dating''.. then most first outings are done as a couple..

meanwhile, we should have series of dates, to check compatibility, where issues like money , family and ideals are raised. if we are on the same page , then we can kick off..

Op you ain't wrong in asking that question. Being cryptic about finances is not to be described as wisdom or security especially in a relationship. Seriously, money should be discussed as a priority. Financial infidelity starts gradually.

Akposb:
Op you ain't wrong in asking that question. Being cryptic about finances is not to be described as wisdom or security especially in a relationship. Seriously, money should be discussed as a priority. Financial infidelity starts gradually.

unfortunately, many ladies cherish their purses more their bodies.