Hello Everyone.

I humbly ask for your opinion and suggestions to help in making a life changing decision. My first relationship in Nigeria was with a Togolese which lasted for 6 years. During our courtship, her parents made it clear she ain't getting married to a Nigerian except one from the country and community. We believed, disobeyed and thought things would definitely work out cos we love ourselves. The relationship eventually collapsed as she cheated twice and I couldn't contain it. She ended up as a baby mama presently with a Nigerian and yoruba to be precise.

Now I reside in England, working with London Underground and I've got a partner whose parents are originally from Congo but lived in Italy thus she is an Italian. I forgot to mention me having a four year old son in Lagos Nigeria but not legally married with his mum as my previous relationship destroyed love and affection. Now same thing kept coming as this my partners parent want her married to their kinsmen which is against her wish. She urged we having a child to prevent them breaking us.

Do you think is advisable doing this as her parents vowed not to even accept our child? I've got a colleague whom I met whilst working in the train maintenance department and the chemistry grew between us. She wants a life commitment also. Please I don't want to break hearts here and also want to move on in life. Advice please

How people always think bringing a child into the equation will solve anything always beats my imagination. If the parents don't want you,bros move on.
Your meeting of this your new colleague who wants a "commitment" tells me a part of you has moved on already.You are already thinking it.


What ever you do, DO NOT bring a child into this complicated life of yours. The one you have in Nigeria is enough for now.

Emmybabs4eva:
Hello Everyone.

I humbly ask for your opinion and suggestions to help in making a life changing decision. My first relationship in Nigeria was with a Togolese which lasted for 6 years. During our courtship, her parents made it clear she ain't getting married to a Nigerian except one from the country and community. We believed, disobeyed and thought things would definitely work out cos we love ourselves. The relationship eventually collapsed as she cheated twice and I couldn't contain it. She ended up as a baby mama presently with a Nigerian and yoruba to be precise.

Now I reside in England, working with London Underground and I've got a partner whose parents are originally from Congo but lived in Italy thus she is an Italian. I forgot to mention me having a four year old son in Lagos Nigeria but not legally married with his mum as my previous relationship destroyed love and affection. Now same thing kept coming as this my partners parent want her married to their kinsmen which is against her wish. She urged we having a child to prevent them breaking us.

Do you think is advisable doing this as her parents vowed not to even accept our child? I've got a colleague whom I met whilst working in the train maintenance department and the chemistry grew between us. She wants a life commitment also. Please I don't want to break hearts here and also want to move on in life. Advice please

Okies..

But who'd u rather ? U can't have both of them...u have to weigh a partner that wont give u headache sha..

You're already in the process of breaking hearts by having two relationships with two different women simultaneously. Duh! Tell me, how are you different from your Togolese ex that cheated on you? As someone that have experienced heartbreak, you should know better than putting yourself in these kinda situations, where you know heartbreak is going to be the only outcome whichever way you choose. You're wrong. Fullstop. What should you do? IDK. You should have thought it through before getting involved with both these women.

I do appreciate your comments. My colleague I met few months ago and we do talk about life experience, have chats during lunch hour.

With my partner, I wouldn't wish to raise my son in a situation where my inlaws refuses to see the benefits of marriage between two different countries, ethnicity and tribe. I've never cheated on her but just concerned if we decided to give this a shot and it boomerang.

It's been a fierce battle and am just holding on to making a peaceful resolution with her before giving the other lady a go. I've been with my partner for 2 years and this honestly was the major reason I refused having family until am convinced her parents would accept the ideology of a different culture.

They have a bias mindset of Nigerians are fraudulent, the language barrier as they speak French and their local dialect. Am just confused and undecided yet.

Don't marry for pity. Marriage is a lifetime commitment so follow your heart

Oh thanks so much and sincerely appreciate your opinion. I think the decision can finally be made now. Thanks everyone for your candid advice.

Cheers

To @ Jeffreyjamez, trapqueen77, lasbel and everyone I say a big thank you. My first relationship and heart break was a big lesson to avoid same re-occurring. Am just been mindful despite wanting to move on and also trying to prevent hurting her. Females are fragile in heart but not in decision making like guys. I love my son so much and am trying to prevent same old scenario with the mum. I shall explain to my partner and subtly end the relationship.

Thanks everyone once more. I do appreciate