My question goes in to 2 categories, to the men and to the women.

Ladies First:
As an advanced and matured woman, she got married through a long distance relationship. For the few years she was waiting for the completion of her hubby's doc. to come over join her.
As they said body no be firewood, knowing or unknowing, loneliness or unlonliness, she got impregnated by another man she was seeing over there she is.
She is left with 3 options in this case.
1. Termination( which can she cant consider to be the right option for her due to some reasons)
2. Telling her husband the truth and asking for his forgiveness, and
3. Travelling to him just after few weeks of pregnancy and sleeping with him to transfer the responsibility to him.
If you were in her shoes what would you chose to do.

For the men:
You are in Nigeria, without even a Job, struggling to make ends meet, and suddenly you met with a western lady online. Either by love or lust she came down to Nigeria and got married with you and went back to process your papers to join her. Jst almost at the completion of your papers she gave you a breaking news of few weeks pregnancy by another man over there. Despite that she still want you as her husband and explain how much she loves and still wanna be with you, asking for your forgivness.
1. Will you forgive and accept her back with the pregnancy?
2. Does she still worth you travelling all the way to overseas just to be with her? or
3. Would you ask her to F.U.CK off with whatever arrangement both are making to leave Naija.

What would you if you were in this Man's shoes.
NB. Sincere and matured response pls.

first you have to tell us if the guy is marrying her for LOVE or for papers. . . . . .
what is he after exactly? as a jobless man living in 9ja, this guy will have no options but to marry her just to get out of 9ja and find his Eldorado.

AS FOR ME i can never do it and will tell the biatch to disappear quietly. . . . . . i regard honesty/trust very highly, she would have already broken these simple rules and therefore no union would be possible.

it doesnt matter how Hot she was, if she truly had love for me then she should have kept her legs closed OR tell me about how Hot she was before going to get bleeped by some guy. the fact that she didnt use protection with this guy would have also shown me how immature/reckless she is when there is fire in her toto and that it was not a one off thing.

she definitely couldnt have quietly sneak that pregnancy on me as i would never have had sex with her unprotected until well after we both went to a doc for test and that pregnancy would have shown by then.
being married doesnt mean that you have to be stupid!

Well i'll choose to tell him & hopes he 4gives me,if doesn't the baby's dad has got to marry me.GOD FOrbid sha,i don't see myself being this stupid & careless,whatever happened to condoms.

freecocoa:

Well i'll choose to tell him & hopes he 4gives me,if doesn't the baby's dad has got to marry me.GOD FOrbid sha,i don't see myself being this silly & careless,whatever happened to condoms.

Great, thought also this might be the best choice.

first you have to tell us if the guy is marrying her for LOVE or for papers. . . . . .
what is he after exactly? as a jobless man living in 9ja, this guy will have no options but to marry her just to get out of 9ja and find his Eldorado

My brother i cant tell oooh. Dont know much abt her husband, but from what i know abt their relationship i think the guy see it as a way of escaping Naija, though might be love in future when they are together, cant really tell.

i regard honesty/trust very highly, she would have already broken these simple rules and therefore no union would be possible.

EXACTLY!!

well my option is not on your list but never mind. If i would be so dumb to have an affair outside marriage and get pregnant, I will leave my husband and go with the guy whom the infant belongs to. Why to ditch others if you can do such a stupid thing you need to leave your husband and not make his life more miserable. Take the consequence because you chose to have the affair not him.

sexyLeamon:

well my option is not on your list but never mind. If i would be so dumb to have an affair outside marriage and get pregnant, I will leave my husband and go with the guy whom the infant belongs to. Why to ditch others if you can do such a silly thing you need to leave your husband and not make his life more miserable. Take the consequence because you chose to have the affair not him.

Infact that would have been best option, but in a situation where the man in question is a married man, and not ready to leave his family for you. What would you do?

For me as a guys, to hell with love and your papers to go abroad. There are many persons abroad living unhappy lives because of mistakes in marriage influenced by one fact (money, paper(s), family e.t.c.). i will not trade my happiness with any of these. Come to think of it, some ladies cheat on their men here in Nigeria where they are closer, why would i risk having another man's child that because of the obvious fact of paternity, i may not love.

For the lady, tell the man the truth (hard truth) and expect the worst. You may be surprised that the worst may not be that bad.

Spyker:

For me as a guys, to hell with love and your papers to go abroad. There are many persons abroad living unhappy lives because of mistakes in marriage influenced by one fact (money, paper(s), family e.t.c.). i will not trade my happiness with any of these. Come to think of it, some ladies cheat on their men here in Nigeria where they are closer, why would i risk having another man's child that because of the obvious fact of paternity, i may not love.

For the lady, tell the man the truth (hard truth) and expect the worst. You may be surprised that the worst may not be that bad.

GBAM