What the op said its true except the terrifying dreams . Always tell your wife , any nightmares u have. even if her face appears as a key player in it .

But the rest ?? No!
Orelse na wahala o.

The sincere truth is this... There is no ultimate way to go about the affairs of a relationship.
What works for you might not necessarily work for another.
Find your own path and let the light shine!

therealMcCain:
One size doesn't fit it all

Know your wife, her strength & abilities

It isn't all about love

So because I love my wife I should divulge sensitive work info to her?

As a security personnel, I should divulge state secrets to her because I am not supposed to keep a secret from her?

How do u tell ur wife that u are aroused by the housemaid or that u have padeophllic or homosexual fantasies

She isnt your Jesus, neither is she your shrink

Some matters are best dealt with with other professionals

If your wife is wasteful or isn't a good saver, then wisdom teaches that you shouldn't tell her about the true state of your finances

If your wife isn't the type that can keep secrets, then wisdom teaches that you shouldn't tell her secrets

The list goes on

Someone once said that "doing the right thing isn't always right"

Bro, what if she also has things she doesn't want to tell you cos of how she thinks you will handle it, which then raises your suspicions from you, doesn't it create more room for rift and mistrust? Why not just sign a child bearing agreement if thats it?

tosyne2much:
As for me, I see no reason why I should be secretive to my wife. There's love and unity when you let your wife know her flaws and the core areas she needs to adjust in order to become a better person

No qualms oga, tell your wife your mum does not like her/noticed some horrible behaviors about her. You'll now know what lack of peace/sleep is.

Lumig:
No qualms oga, tell your wife your mum does not like her/noticed some horrible behaviors about her.

You don't need to tell her "my mumsy said this"

Wisdom is the principal thing

creative11:

It’s always a good idea to be totally open to your wife. Let her know your plans, movements, visions and thinking. This will help her to connect well with you and get along with you as your wife and Mother of the house.

Despite the facts that you should be totally open to your wife, there are 9 secrets that you should never reveal to your Wife. Let me open your eyes to them here:

1) BAD THINGS YOUR MOTHER SAID ABOUT HER:

Maybe before you married her or after your wedding, your Parents might have told you some things they don’t like about your wife for one reason or the other.

You have to be careful the way you talk to her about what they said. You may correct her without telling her who said what or say it in such a way that she will not get hurt by their words.

If you say it the way they said it, you may create eternal enmity between them.11 Secrets Man Should Never Reveal To His Wife


2) BAD THINGS YOUR FAMILY SAID ABOUT HER:

Like your Parents, your siblings, Uncles, Aunties etc might have said some negative things about your wife in the past, handle this with care, lest you create a battle that may outlive you between them.

3) YOUR TERRIFYING DREAMS:

It is very easy for a woman to wake her husband up to tell him about her nightmares and terrible dreams. 11 Secrets Man Should Never Reveal To His Wife


It’s not bad for a woman to say this to her husband, but it is not always good for a man to share terrible dreams with his wife that may not allow her to sleep.

You can tell her to pray or pray together concerning the dreams but avoid giving her the graphic details, lest you scare her. 11 Secrets Man Should Never Reveal To His Wife

4) HOW YOUR FRIENDS REALLY FEEL ABOUT HER:

You friends might say unkind words about her.If you relay it the way they presented it; your house may become a no-go area for such friend.

5) YOUR DIRTY FEELINGS ABOUT HER:

Avoid speaking out your negative thought about her when you fight If you utter all that is in your mind in time of conflict, you will hurt your wife greatly and destroy your home


6) GIRLS THAT ARE EYEING YOU:

Once in a while, you may notice some ladies who are really after you and see you as their source of “crush” despite the fact that you are married. You don’t just go ahead to tell your wife about this, for a lady to show interest in you may not necessarily means she is after you.So, be careful. If you tell your wife about it, she may not handle It rightly and can begin to suspect you and fight the innocent lady.

7) HOW YOU REALLY FEEL ABOUT HIS MUM:

Her Mum may not be behaving very well by your standard, but that is how she’s been behaving and raised the damsel that you married. So, it will be bad to tell your Wife that her Mother or Father are not well behaved.

HOW WHAT PEOPLE SAID REALLY HURTS YOU:

Some people will say something that will hurt you greatly. Please, avoid saying how it hurts shedding tears in the process. If you end up forgiven the person your wife may never forgive somebody that makes her husband cries.

9) HOW WHAT PEOPLE DID GREATLY Hurt YOU:

Just like the case above, people will do something that hurts you, but must avoid sensationalizing it to your wife. Please, always downplay your hurt so as to make it easy for your wife to forgive people.

10) NAMES OF GIRLS YOU HAD SLEPT WITH:

It will be totally wrong to show her the list of those you slept with before you met your wife. She doesn’t need that information, they are your Ex, please move on

11) PAST SEXUAL ENJOYMENT:

Likewise, you need not tell her what you enjoy in other ladies to motivate her to perform better in the bedroom, that will be very wrong.


http://www.dailyfamily.ng/11-secrets-man-never-reveal-wife/

You should just tell us not to tell our wives any secret then

tosyne2much:
You don't need to tell her "my mumsy said this"

Wisdom is the principal thing

That means you have not been outrightly open. It's better to keep shut than raising avoidable tension in your marriage. I wonder how you'll tell her your mom notices some bad behaviors in her. Maybe you'll say "someone notices a..." LOL

hollah123:
are u married? if ur answer is no,u can't understand. though am not saying all those points are right but married fellas will relate with many of those points. in marriage there will b a time everything won't b about I love u again, that's when reality sets in. aside that what if u have issues breakup/divorce?will she not use something's against u. person wey dey cry still dey c road my brother

You asked if he's married and assumed if no, then he won't understand , my dear, what if he is married. Do u still think he doesn't understand, I agree with a few points u made but 90% of what u said is being dishonest. For your information, most married couples dated before marrying and past relationships were probably discussed. If my friend doesn't like my partner I cut them loose. If my MIL dislikes my partner that I can keep from them to avoid confrontation or face carrying. And yes am totally married with kids and I keep nothing, I mean absolutely nothing from my spouse. So does he, you can't built ur home by hiding stuff, it's unhealthy, learn to open up. You share everything including good dreams and nightmares, if MIL does something u don't like, u approach ur spouse and discuss it so they will stylishly related to their mum to correct it. Harboring things ain't good in marriage oo cos one day u will get tired and burst out. Then ur marriage will be ruined. Always discuss everything, it builds a closer bond.

hollah123:
are u married? if ur answer is no,u can't understand. though am not saying all those points are right but married fellas will relate with many of those points. in marriage there will b a time everything won't b about I love u again, that's when reality sets in. aside that what if u have issues breakup/divorce?will she not use something's against u. person wey dey cry still dey c road my brother

Exactly what i was going to say.

Depending on the type of woman you have.
Mine knows almost everything and it has worked for me.
She is my angel.
As a guy I dey spend money unnecessary but she now make but only the necessary thing.
She use her own money for herself while mine is mine

DivinelyBlessed:
NEVER DIVULGE ALL YOUR BANK ACCOUNTS, STREAMS OF INCOME

My dear, what if you die suddenly and untimely? How will she recover what should ordinaryly become her's and the children? Would she not need all those assets to take Care of the children and herself? Would you be happy if someone else embezzle your moneys because your wife doesn't know about it? Think again!

Lumig:
That means you have not been outrightly open. It's better to keep shut than raising avoidable tension in your marriage. I wonder how you'll tell her your mom notices some bad behaviors in her. Maybe you'll say "someone notices a..." LOL

Or my friend made this derogatory remark about you.. I swear that guy must not step his feet into your house again

WHY?

Drdreyy:

MrBrownJay1:
Arrant nonsense!!
1-2-4) if anyone says anything bad about my partner then they will get the bashing of their life.... And subsequently be removed from my circle of friends/family....
If someone doesn't like her then I will make sure she knows.

3) if I wake up screaming because of a bad dream, then why shouldn't I tell her?!

5) any feeling you have about her, whether dirty or sweet, let her know.... That's how you make things easier at home, rather than being an hypocrite.

6) as if she wouldn't figure it out... Actually that would make her stay in check.

7) same as #1-2, what's good for the goose...

8-9) the only way to have a great r/ship is to fully open yourself. Being a coward is a cheap way to be on a r/ship. It's all or nothing!

10-11) why should I pretend to be a virgin, or lie about my sexual past?! This is what makes me the great ME, so be proud and let it all out, before she learns the truth from her damn friends.

your choice; your life.
Just know that you don't know everything, a friend might know something about your wife --which you dont know--that will help your life

Wisdom is the principal thing here.
Know your wife and live your life.

Anextin:

You asked if he's married and assumed if no, then he won't understand , my dear, what if he is married. Do u still think he doesn't understand, I agree with a few points u made but 90% of what u said is being dishonest. For your information, most married couples dated before marrying and past relationships were probably discussed. If my friend doesn't like my partner I cut them loose. If my MIL dislikes my partner that I can keep from them to avoid confrontation or face carrying. And yes am totally married with kids and I keep nothing, I mean absolutely nothing from my spouse. So does he, you can't built ur home by hiding stuff, it's unhealthy, learn to open up. You share everything including good dreams and nightmares, if MIL does something u don't like, u approach ur spouse and discuss it so they will stylishly related to their mum to correct it. Harboring things ain't good in marriage oo cos one day u will get tired and burst out. Then ur marriage will be ruined. Always discuss everything, it builds a closer bond.

I'm equally married with kids ,and I can relate with what everyone is saying, everyone has their opinions, the important thing here is... Before you open up to your spouse, make sure they can handle what you are about to say. If not, I agree that some things are to be postponed for later. Every wife hAs their level of maturity,same goes for husband.
Let everyone know that Honesty and openness makes marriage stronger. And this should be a target, I experienced this with my wife when we just got married, we both had read, attended conferences, sought for advice from experienced married couples and I can say we were well prepared for marriage but later, we were having soooooo much clashes that.. .to cut the story short, I realized that our problems was: trying to apply all the experiences at the same time. When anyone tells you the qualities of a happy home. Let this be a target that you should aim for, not something you must achieve in your first year of marriage. Rome wasn't built in a day. Else you will ask yourself how u failed even after doing everything you were told. It will Be becos you have applied the right things at the wrong time.
My advice is.. . Plan, plan plan first, before u do.. So that reality will not wipe love away from your eyes.


And Yes, I tell my wife eeeverything, and I'm happy and free.
If anyone criticizes my wife, all I do is listen first, then handle it my own way... Most of it has happened, yet my wife never knew who critisized her. If you have a problem with my wife, talk to me, I'm the one to speak to her not you.

GeneralOjukwu:
12. That Uncle Joseph on your phone is actually Jessica

Badt guy!

Guy take am easy Na, because you met the wrong one doesn't mean women in general are bad, bros many women today can make you great if you don't know

EVILFOREST:

If I have my way NOTHING will be revealed to women.
They don't deserve to know anything going on, because they can't manage SUCCESSFUL NEWS nor weird news...

They create unrest even when there is peace.
LADIES dislike seeing MEN HAPPY, because they also see such as CHEATING.....

futurerex:
Very True. I Concure

what re u concurring :p?

idesylvester:
Guy take am easy Na, because you met the wrong one doesn't mean women in general are bad, bros many women today can make you great if you don't know

You're right bro. You don't treat a woman with misogyny and expect her to help you to stardom

MrBrownJay1:


Nonsense.... A family is a TEAM, and unless you tell your teammate about your weaknesses etc (so that she will fully be able to make the team stronger, and score for the family), if not, you are just fooling yourself with a stranger in your losing team.

Furthermore, only a very weak insecure man would not open up to his life partner, in fear that she may use it against him in the future. Here is a clue: this is YOU, are you ashamed of who you are?! What kind of man is that?!

No wonder so many people divorce, when people think like you do.

the way u talk shows you are ignorant on marriage issues. it's either you are newly married or not yet married. some things are easier said than done, so wait until you are in the shoes.

DivinelyBlessed:
NEVER DIVULGE ALL YOUR BANK ACCOUNTS, STREAMS OF INCOME

When you die and they are looking for money to bury you nko plus to cater for your children...what will be the advantage of keeping such a secret? Na bank owners go chop that your money.

Bullshiiiiiiiit Na by force dem dey create thread?

hollah123:
are u married? if ur answer is no,u can't understand. though am not saying all those points are right but married fellas will relate with many of those points. in marriage there will b a time everything won't b about I love u again, that's when reality sets in. aside that what if u have issues breakup/divorce?will she not use something's against u. person wey dey cry still dey c road my brother

With dis comment it shows u are very muture and hav seen tins, all does jamb student no know. Wetin b marriage den think say marriage na telenovela. No wonder dere all dis indomie generation marriage no dey last

mctowel01:

Bro, what if she also has things she doesn't want to tell you cos of how she thinks you will handle it, which then raises your suspicions from you, doesn't it create more room for rift and mistrust? Why not just sign a child bearing agreement if thats it?

I am married, are you?

There are things you hear/see & you wish you never heard them

Some things are between you and God

Others are between you & your shrink/counsellors

Then your spouse

talk2rotman:


bro...u av ur past and ur experiences. so dont condemn som1 becos of theirs. the op might have had some experiences too. i pray u dont go tru situation that will make u totally hate women. eni ija o ba lo n pe ara e lokunrin.
meaning its d person dat has not face some tough situation that will he boasting that he is a man. just express ur view without attacting d personality of d writer.
peace

noted....thanks

MrBrownJay1:
Arrant nonsense!!
1-2-4) if anyone says anything bad about my partner then they will get the bashing of their life.... And subsequently be removed from my circle of friends/family....
If someone doesn't like her then I will make sure she knows.

3) if I wake up screaming because of a bad dream, then why shouldn't I tell her?!

5) any feeling you have about her, whether dirty or sweet, let her know.... That's how you make things easier at home, rather than being an hypocrite.

6) as if she wouldn't figure it out... Actually that would make her stay in check.

7) same as #1-2, what's good for the goose...

8-9) the only way to have a great r/ship is to fully open yourself. Being a coward is a cheap way to be on a r/ship. It's all or nothing!

10-11) why should I pretend to be a virgin, or lie about my sexual past?! This is what makes me the great ME, so be proud and let it all out, before she learns the truth from her damn friends.

God bless you... The op is a dumb head.. very silly opinions.

EVILFOREST:

If I have my way NOTHING will be revealed to women.
They don't deserve to know anything going on, because they can't manage SUCCESSFUL NEWS nor weird news...

They create unrest even when there is peace.
LADIES dislike seeing MEN HAPPY, because they also see such as CHEATING.....

bros, if u av never bn opportune to meet the good once ask God for the grace bcuz is not meant for every body. perhaps u av make the wrong choice already stil ask God for graceto persevere to enternity til the nxt world.always remember bhind any successful man there is a woman“maturity differenciat and places individuals in there different clases.

mtchew. U dont know what to say