laudate:


Wow! You are a woman blessed with great wisdom. I pray God blesses you richly with all the happiness you deserve!

Yes o, i highly recommend her. Her wisdom is legendary

Blissquare:
The sister that advises you to buy a car for her, does she have a car herself? They advised you to treat her well? Do they not trust your love for her? They sent you to the university but mine of them went. I see what you people do not see. Your wife to be had read through them and knows that their love for her is not sincere. They are acting nice just to find favour from your marriage with her and you won't forget them. It is hard to marry an only son who is also the wealthiest and most educated. The live they are showing is fake. If they met her only once, why do they love her? They just want to be close to your marriage and make sure they remain in your life completely.

which kind yama yama talk be this?

Oga, do you need a soothsayer to tell you you are headed in the wrong direction? As a 3-star general (3 lovely children) in marriage i make do to tell you that its now or never! Call your fiance to order NOW!
Make this also know to her parents that such is unacceptable.......(gauge their response) cos sometimes she is been encouraged from the background. Moreover, bros put that wedding on hold. Yes u will ask me, wat about the money invested (anyways thats for guys that still do that), what will my people say, bla bla bla.....Who gives a fcvK! I was once told during my wedding preps back then that whatsoever i can not tolerate or i see as wrong i should not swallow it under the guise that "she will change" cos the moment u walk down that isle and take ur vows bro, u are in for a long thing especially if the girl is learned....u go pay for divorce. So chose wisely, to be know as a man that put his wedding on hold or a man that divorced his new wife a few years after a flamboyant wedding?

Love ur wife with ur head not ur heart, women are not only to be loved and cherished, but should be shown the red line which they MUST not cross!

amliftedhigher:
Good morning wonderful nairalanders.

I Am having a very delicate family issues now. I am an only son of my family and 5 sisters all married, since I brought my wife to be to them they all love her with passion and they keep telling me to take good care of the girl, they keep warning me not to treat her bad.

My sister love my Wife with passion including my aged mother but my wife to be in return hates them openly to me.

She doesn't like me mention them before her or discuss any thing with them. But she adores her family so much. We have finished traditional marriage remaining church wedding which is next two weeks from today.

During our preparations my family has noticed her long mute with them in issues of our wedding arrangement, they ask me but I told them that my wife is a shy type that doesn't talk too much but I was lying.

N/B they have not done anything evil to her and they will not think about it because they all fear me but my confusion Now is why my wife hates them? One of my sister lives in the same city with my wife but she hardly visits her.

My fellow comrades please what do I do? I can't hate my sisters because they and their husbands train me in the university . I came from a poor home but seeing the love I have for education all My sisters and their husbands swear that I must attend university . My God's grace I am working in one of the best organization in the country now am comfortable. Do I chase my family away now because of a woman I am getting married to? Help am confused.

Thanks in anticipation

Blissquare:
The sister that advises you to buy a car for her, does she have a car herself? They advised you to treat her well? Do they not trust your love for her? They sent you to the university but mine of them went. I see what you people do not see. Your wife to be had read through them, and knows that their love for her is not sincere. They are acting nice just to find favour from your marriage with her and you won't forget them. It is hard to marry an only son who is also the wealthiest and most educated. The live they are showing is fake. If they met her only once, why do they love her? They just want to be close to your marriage and make sure they remain in your life completely.

What kind of twisted, shallow perspective is this? Ok, when you get married (or if you are already married) I pray your spouse cuts you off from your family completely, and does not allow them to remain close to you. Is it a crime for a man's family to remain in his life completely? Or should they become enemies, the minute he gets married? The OP's family made sacrifices to see him through university, and you turn round now to say their love is NOT sincere? Do you think they did not have better things to do with their money? Has it occurred to you, that they may be extending their love for their brother to her, which is why they loved her from the first meeting?

bluetrails7:



Sola taking her sister's side, well done you hear?


Well, study has always been my enclave, where i find the greatest buddy i can trust , the pace in my innermost soul, sufficeto point out that males and females are the victims of the relationships of relationships before our generation that has casted a shadow on the new generation tilting it in its development. People fear before they start, they bail before they reason, they fall before they stand. Common reasoning is becoming somewhat expensive and extinct.

Males and females after tedious reaserch, like Adam and Eve, i've come to believe are victims of external factors, or things beyond both genders, our love languages is plagued with violence, mistrust, doubts,fears, paranoia, skepticism, lack of love, lack of trust, lack of desire, yet the heart desires to be loved, we build all these sophisticated armories in our minds like it's a battle against human kind. When we can take down these defenses and figure things out by ourselves, we strain ourselves,drain ourselves all for what? We don't want to be cheated.

Like the foundation determines he quality of the building that rests upon it, i reiterate the cause of the problem is faulty perceptions and defective views of life, most times brought about my the media, and the experiences of others we must have adopted thinking they were harmless but had developed roots, shoots and buds deep down in our own souls. Which is why we can't wait to hear about people from their mouth, but paint a picture about them from all these tedious machineries we built in our minds.


Ladies, clear your minds, ladies have much more work to do than men...Men do, but ladies more...No beefs please

The work is when you change your words and your actions to along with the legacy you want to leave behind the next generation should inspire you to do better and build each other up to. You will have your issues but they will not become issues if your open to making each other's lives easier.

I'm not siding my sister you have said enough for me too I'm just generally speaking

I don't do research I don't want to die early I just know when I'm gone I want people to know I came

solasoulmusic:


The work is when you change your words and your actions to along with the legacy you want to leave behind the next generation should inspire you to do better and build each other up to. You will have your issues but they will not become issues if your open to making each other's lives easier.

I'm not siding my sister you have said enough for me too I'm just generally speaking here

....

bluetrails7:



Well i have no history of evil Sola, perhaps you're saying what i;m also saying. It's our fathers, some of them, not all though but , our fathers, the teeth of the sons are on the edge Sola. Maybe i'll get a dolphin, get a carpenter to build a wooden shelf and get married to it....

It is well sha share cake make we chop on that day but I no dey follow you under the sea o I sabI dolphin language me and my people

Just a lil piece of advice,bro. Ur family has been there for u from day one, and will always be. So, don't marry a lady who'll alienate u from them, and besides, remember u are an only son. D earlier u call off d wedding, the better for u.

solasoulmusic:


It is well sha share cake make we chop on that day but I no dey follow you under the sea o I sabI dolphin language me and my people

..

To slap this mumu OP just dey hungry me..


How will a sane human being open his eyes and walk into a burning fire for God sake.

D woman u married is a viper and a black mamba..u better do somthing fast..before she spits venom on ur happy family....

you must have had signs of this while courting which you ignored and went ahead with the TM, what you cant change while courting , you cant change in marriage /
your family is a very important part of you life
man up talk to her set your rules postpone the marriage plans / if its not working well with her and your family den leave her she is not ready to be married, if you go further she will divide your home, train your kids with the very wrong mind set bring enemies in the family........wake up man

tukdi:
Baba don't be a woman wrapper! Suspend every plan concerning the white wedding Asap!

You must tame that thing immediately!

Just because of one fucken girl, you want to disassociate your self from your family, who does that?

I rather stay single than to please that thing in the house!

3 gbosa for u!!

Leave that woman and run for your dear life.
I warn you, forget the lady and be yourself,she is not your wife.
I know why I'm saying this.That lady will kill you if you marry her. I don't respond to this kind of post but something compelled me to admonish you now. No amount of love should make you marry the lady. Forget the trad marriage, forget the money spent but run for your life.
I have spoken bcoz I know what two of my friends are going tru and they are walking corpses.
I can reach you if you are interested for further proof.
Cheers my brother.

I'm really sorry for bringing this up here but I got to say it; my uncle's wife is just like the OP's wife. First of all she pretends to like u a lot and stabs you in the back. This is a woman people were praising to be well brought up in a typical African way, but the woman is a divider. She has succeeded in alienating every of her husband's family member from their home. Initially my bro was feeling unconcerned but right now, my guy eye don clear. Nobody gives a Bleep about him and his family no more and its telling on his kids. I feel sorry for the OP, you know why because talking to her like some folks are saying will not change her. A tiger does not change his strips.

amliftedhigher:
please I was only asking a question. I didn't and will not try to dissociate with my family members?

pls don't do. family over everytin. i love my family and i will always do.

coolcatty:
Smh

This marriage is so so heading to the rocks.... See massive red flag.

10k bet that this marriage won't get to 1year mark.

Who's betting with me on this?

I won't waste my money on a marriage that is obviously dead on arrival. I ain't betting pls

amliftedhigher:
please I was only asking a question. I didn't and will not try to dissociate with my family members?

You will eventually do so when you are forced to choose between your family and saving your marriage from crashing

Oyindidi:
That question is somehow offensive. Marriage is a lifetime commitment and a girl is not comfortable with your family members. Call off the wedding if she's not ready to change. There are a thousand and one good and well cultured girls ready for marriage.

That same silly question almost made me insulted the OP. It's offensive for him to nurse such an idea in the first place so your reaction is spot on.

amliftedhigher:
All good advice taken. I will not betray my family and I will not treat her bad but I pray she listens when I will talk to her to avoid getting me angry. Thanks everybody here. God bless you all and give you a good and peaceful wife and husbands.

Hmmm.....op am not wishing you bad but i give you just 5 months max and you will come back here
God reveals for love and to protect us ,humans conceals for selfsish reasons

i sorry for you. Wait till you completed all marriage rite. Then she will show your family something. i doubt she will even let the kids go near them. No let love blind you. better deal with it now and make her know that your family is part of you. Especially because they like her. Assuming they don't like her, then i for understand her para.

laudate:


What do you mean??! Didn't you read his subsequent post about how she gets angry anytime he is on the phone with his family, and how she threw tantrums, because his sister got him a vendor that was charging 280k as against the 400k she wanted to spend? She ended up bad mouthing the sisters directly to him, and calling them "controlling!" Any woman who is in love with a man, would care about the same things he cares for! If she feels he is spineless, then why did she agree to marry him? Why not wait for a macho man with a backbone of steel? And you are here telling him to 'adjust.' Adjust to what? Her rude & disrespectful behaviour?? Or her irrational tantrums that will eventually succeed in driving a wedge between him and his family?

cc: amliftedhigher

Do you live with amliftedhigher? If No, then we are both commenting on the information he has given. I am not insulting you OP! If she gets angry about your calls, ask yourself maybe you are already a talker. Women talk a lot and you lived admist them. If she wants an expensive vendor what will cost you to tell her that you have budgeted 300k for this, find a vendor within the capacity or add up the remaining. This life is easy don't complicate your marriage before starting it. I still maintain that you communicate with her and try understand her view but if you don't, break up your marriage like some are saying and start looking for the perfect partner that exists in dreams.

u just av to sit her down nd talk sense to her . let her know dat she need to love ur sisters for peace to actually reign in d matrimonial home.

bluetrails7:



Sola taking her sister's side, well done you hear?


Well, study has always been my enclave, where i find the greatest buddy i can trust , the pace in my innermost soul, sufficeto point out that males and females are the victims of the relationships of relationships before our generation that has casted a shadow on the new generation tilting it in its development. People fear before they start, they bail before they reason, they fall before they stand. Common reasoning is becoming somewhat expensive and extinct.

Males and females after tedious reaserch, like Adam and Eve, i've come to believe are victims of external factors, or things beyond both genders, our love languages is plagued with violence, mistrust, doubts,fears, paranoia, skepticism, lack of love, lack of trust, lack of desire, yet the heart desires to be loved, we build all these sophisticated armories in our minds like it's a battle against human kind. When we can take down these defenses and figure things out by ourselves, we strain ourselves,drain ourselves all for what? We don't want to be cheated.

Like the foundation determines he quality of the building that rests upon it, i reiterate the cause of the problem is faulty perceptions and defective views of life, most times brought about my the media, and the experiences of others we must have adopted thinking they were harmless but had developed roots, shoots and buds deep down in our own souls. Which is why we can't wait to hear about people from their mouth, but paint a picture about them from all these tedious machineries we built in our minds.


Ladies, clear your minds, ladies have much more work to do than men...Men do, but ladies more...No beefs please

This is deep!

Excellent7:


This is deep!

..

Do not compromise your family, better quit and move forward, she isn't the only lady in town.
In fact she does not like you too, she is just after material things. Period

You are married already and so don't even think about divorcing your wife.

You made a very terrible mistake by not fixing this issue before paying her dowry.
I am married, my husband's family and I get along very well because i purposed in my heart from the onset to live with them in love.
My husband's older brother is also married but his wife and my inlaws are not so good together, these things have to do with the woman's background most times. I don't see my inlaws as a threat to me or my husband's resources so i love them unconditionally and get along with them. Please set your house in order, call your inlaws and your wife together and clarify things before the white wedding and please if you have been giving her too much info about members of your family before now, please curtail it. Find out from her what her problem is and why she detests them, some women go into marriage with the mindset that they must be tough and rigid with their inlaws, they must keep boundaries and not tolerate any nonsense from inlaws so the earlier she started giving them attitude the better for her...but this is very wrong...Love births love.

amliftedhigher:
Good morning wonderful nairalanders.

I Am having a very delicate family issues now. I am an only son of my family and 5 sisters all married, since I brought my wife to be to them they all love her with passion and they keep telling me to take good care of the girl, they keep warning me not to treat her bad.

My sister love my Wife with passion including my aged mother but my wife to be in return hates them openly to me.

She doesn't like me mention them before her or discuss any thing with them. But she adores her family so much. We have finished traditional marriage remaining church wedding which is next two weeks from today.

During our preparations my family has noticed her long mute with them in issues of our wedding arrangement, they ask me but I told them that my wife is a shy type that doesn't talk too much but I was lying.

N/B they have not done anything evil to her and they will not think about it because they all fear me but my confusion Now is why my wife hates them? One of my sister lives in the same city with my wife but she hardly visits her.

My fellow comrades please what do I do? I can't hate my sisters because they and their husbands train me in the university . I came from a poor home but seeing the love I have for education all My sisters and their husbands swear that I must attend university . My God's grace I am working in one of the best organization in the country now am comfortable. Do I chase my family away now because of a woman I am getting married to? Help am confused.

Thanks in anticipation

dindinrin

slave of pussy


dont use your dick to think use your brain

amliftedhigher:
Good morning wonderful nairalanders.

I Am having a very delicate family issues now. I am an only son of my family and 5 sisters all married, since I brought my wife to be to them they all love her with passion and they keep telling me to take good care of the girl, they keep warning me not to treat her bad.

My sister love my Wife with passion including my aged mother but my wife to be in return hates them openly to me.

She doesn't like me mention them before her or discuss any thing with them. But she adores her family so much. We have finished traditional marriage remaining church wedding which is next two weeks from today.

During our preparations my family has noticed her long mute with them in issues of our wedding arrangement, they ask me but I told them that my wife is a shy type that doesn't talk too much but I was lying.

N/B they have not done anything evil to her and they will not think about it because they all fear me but my confusion Now is why my wife hates them? One of my sister lives in the same city with my wife but she hardly visits her.

My fellow comrades please what do I do? I can't hate my sisters because they and their husbands train me in the university . I came from a poor home but seeing the love I have for education all My sisters and their husbands swear that I must attend university . My God's grace I am working in one of the best organization in the country now am comfortable. Do I chase my family away now because of a woman I am getting married to? Help am confused.

Thanks in anticipation

I don't care what people will say of my suggestion, I will give it anyway.

If all you said is true and you have not wedded yet, then CALL OFF the wedding asap or at least delay it until you can get her to understand the place of your family in your life.

Women tire me o. She expects you to now hate and avoid people you have known all your life for someone that is just coming into your life now? Pls I beg you, don't marry her no matter how far you have gone before now or how much you have spent. Otherwise you will regret it and you will cry a lot. If your family were bad, it will be a different ball game.

I am telling you from experience. My wife, for no just cause has vowed never to relate with my siblings and my mum. She hates them, she deleted their numbers from her phone. She said she will never pick their calls if she knows they are the ones calling. And if she picks her call & it is any of my family members, she will cut the call. And she specifically added that my mum is included. She vowed she will never allow any of them into our house. Now if you are in my position, what will do - especially as she is the extremely stubborn type? The situation causes me terrible pain.

Meanwhile I cherish all her siblings and her Mum.

Bros I am begging you don't marry her or at least delay the church wedding until she gets some sense. If you must marry her, get a written and video commitment from her that she will love and respect all members of your family the same way she loves and respects her family as long as your family don't do her any serious harm (in any case you won't allow your family hurt your wife). If she refuses to make the commitment or she does so halfheartedly, call of the wedding. I am just trying to spare a brother a lifetime of pain. Believe me you don't want the pain and confusion which among other things will affect your work/job/business or whatever you do. I don talk my own

Live her and move on, there is nothing like family love... Maybe she is among in John 10:10

If your story is true, then, this lady waited for you to marry her traditionally before she shows you who she really is. Please, see your people to see her family and free her by annulling the traditionally marriage. Please don't go ahead with the white becos you cannot kill your family to marry her. Be warned, that she might do jazz for you to forget your family and marry her. Please move on with your life and start all over. I pity you.

amliftedhigher:
please I was only asking a question. I didn't and will not try to dissociate with my family members?

Is it intertribal marriage?