My heart is in pain. I feel so much pain and I dont know what to do. My fiance and I just broke up a day before valentine’s day and its all my fault…no,its not my fault,its my mother’s fault.

I am a 28 year old lady who has been through so much in life. Sometimes,I dont even want to live anymore. I want to die. Yes,I feel like dying is a better option for me. Why,because,anytime there is love in my life,no matter how much I try,I end up loosing the love.

My mother is responsible for my sad state of life. For as long as I can remember,I was abused and ruined by my mother. As young as 8 years old,my mother used me to make commercial gains for herself. I grew up in Benin in the early nineties. My mother was a restaurant owner. Or you could call her pepper soup joint owner. I was a child from her previous marriage. I was told my father died when I was two years old. My mother remarried a useless man. Johnbull was a drunk taxi Driver. Him and his friends frequented my mom’s pepper soup joint and drank their sorrows away.

At the pepper soup joint,I was abused by all kinds of men. My mother did nothing to stop the abuse. In fact,she encouraged it. Men would come to drink in our shop just to also handle me or in some cases,take me to the back and just rape me. This continued until I was sixteen. By the time,I had had at least four abortions. I was helpless and my mother beat me anytime I tried to complain. I hardly went to school either. When I was 17,I met a young man,David. He was in the Nigerian army. He came back home and we met during the christmas holiday. That was the first time I fell in love. David took me out of my mother’s shop and helped me learn how to sew . He got me an apartment and we were happy. He wanted to marry me so he went to see my mom and her drunk husband. They refused to allow David ...

http://livelystones.com.ng/i-will-never-be-able-to-find-love-because-of-my-mother/

Akuko