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How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by liquidmetall: 12:04pm On Mar 03, 2018
smellingmenses:
I am ONLY bothered about your mental health.


lalasticlala forward to front-page



Your husband is bewitched...

This is very serious don't take what I said lightly cos you don't know me
Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by LadySarah: 4:34pm On Mar 03, 2018
Pipedreams:
Stupid husband that has a good submisive wife. I wish my estrange wife was like you. We wud still have been together. She hardly says sorry but am d one to aplogize after days of silent treatment, wicked , rude and unsubmissive, manipulative. I was turning to the woman in the house until i had to man up and leave the toxic marriage. Why is the world like this? Those who have cap dont have head while those that have head dont have cap. Pls dear dont beg him again. So sorry hun

grin grin,thats lifeoo.
my female neighbour i used to admire their marriage came last week to tell me her husband informed her he'll be grtting another wife this easter.
Her crime was that her MIL told her husband that she is a witch .A witch gave you 3 kids and you are doing successful in ur biz?


She doesnt leave our compound ezcept with permissn frm her horseband,not allowed to work .So submissive and quiet but her her husband is a mamas boy.
Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by ImaIma1(f): 7:23pm On Mar 03, 2018
I think the way you always beg him even when he is wrong has made him lose respect for you. I don't think your pastor is right to say you should keep begging. It gives him a great edge over you in the marriage and you will always be at his mercy.

A friend of mine was telling me today of how she always has to beg her husband and he wouldn't speak to her for days. She would keep crying and having sleepless nights. She suddenly stopped it all and ignores him when he is"carrying face". She doesn't call at all unlike before when she was always disturbing his phone with calls at those times.

She needed it for her sanity and peace of mind. You can't be begging someone everytime. It gets old and irritating. When she too started carrying face, he learnt to relax his own face.

Op try and get back your self respect. How could you beg him after he cheated on you. That is wrong! He cannot disrespect you and belittle you by having a mistress and you still beg him. May God direct you

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Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by bellong: 3:14am On Mar 04, 2018
Cutebabiesmum:

my brother, am talking of a Redeemed church pastor. I know my reason of getting worried about telling him. last year, my junior brother(he's just 15 and last born. we are only 3 in family and am the only girl) told me he want to come and spend the long vacation in our house and that night I made favourite dish for my husband, after he finish eating, I knelt down and started praying for him and calling him sweet names, he told me to go straight to the point and i told him my brother is coming to spend the 3rd term vacation in our house,Jesus you need to see how he reacted like the boy will kill him if he come. he said never I should not just dream it. I even told him not to give the boy penny even when he's going back that I will take care of everything, he said no and want to turn it to fight. And he knows am the first born of that family which means most things lies ob my head.

Because he pastors in The Redeemed church doesn't make him any better than ordinary men on the street.

God instructions is for husband to love their wives. It isn't an encouragement but a command. If a pastor does not seem it fit to put the man, who has lost the priesthood of his home, in his place but always telling you that it is the man's world, I make bold to say that he is far from being a true minister of God.

Every action of a pastor must be in agreement with the word of God. Any pastor that goes against God's instructions while dishing out unwholesome advices, is not fit for the position. For your husband to defile his marital bed and still form a champion even with the intervention of the pastor, it shows the kind of pastor you have.

Anyway, the life of the young boy is important in this situation and I will encourage that you do what you can to help him. Tell him you are bringing your brother to the hospital for immediate medical attention. If he doesn't agree, I don't think you should be bothered. I believe the boy will be admitted in the hospital going by how long he has been sick, I may be wrong.

I don't think there is any ceremony needed to tell him. And in a sane union, couples shouldn't be scared to tell each other stuff like this.

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Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by Ishilove: 3:40am On Mar 04, 2018
Cutebabiesmum:

my brother, am talking of a Redeemed church pastor. I know my reason of getting worried about telling him. last year, my junior brother(he's just 15 and last born. we are only 3 in family and am the only girl) told me he want to come and spend the long vacation in our house and that night I made favourite dish for my husband, after he finish eating, I knelt down and started praying for him and calling him sweet names, he told me to go straight to the point and i told him my brother is coming to spend the 3rd term vacation in our house,Jesus you need to see how he reacted like the boy will kill him if he come. he said never I should not just dream it. I even told him not to give the boy penny even when he's going back that I will take care of everything, he said no and want to turn it to fight. And he knows am the first born of that family which means most things lies ob my head.
Woman, stop being a weakling

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Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by josessybj: 5:17am On Mar 04, 2018
They tire ur leg for the man house

1 Like

Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by desoul2004(m): 2:44pm On Jun 02, 2019
Madam, most of all these ladies who are giving you negative advises are suffering more than you in their own relationship. Life generally is not easy anywhere you go. Kindly pray for your marriage/husband, he might not even know the gravity of what he's doing.

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Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by Nobody: 7:28pm On Jun 02, 2019
My Friend carry you bag and your child away from that house. Is that one marriage na force u want to die inside? Are u drugged or charmed? Give him 2 years break let him have all the fun he wants. I think he is not ready to settle down.
Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by Theyoungmatron: 7:52pm On Jun 02, 2019
rawitools:
My Friend carry you bag and your child away from that house. Is that one marriage na force u want to die inside? Are u drugged or charmed? Give him 2 years break let him have all the fun he wants. I think he is not ready to settle down.
she CAN'T, CAUSE THE MAN PROBABLY HAS MONEY, LOTS OF IT. embarassed embarassed

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Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by Nobody: 7:54pm On Jun 02, 2019
Theyoungmatron:
she CAN'T, CAUSE THE MAN PROBABLY HAS MONEY, LOTS OF IT. embarassed embarassed
if she can feed her self and child then she should forget every other thing.

1 Like

Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by sisisioge: 8:47pm On Jun 02, 2019
Bet why would you still be interested in procreating with him or even staying married? Whew! Imagine a wife coming to ask strangers about how to talk to her husband about family issues. Madam, you are an MS o...find your level before its too late.

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Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by CanadianNaija: 11:27pm On Jun 02, 2019
If they call people that are in a marriage now this one will still come out.

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Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by Terryindeed: 2:28am On Jun 03, 2019
I really don’t know if my input will be put in practice. But if you truly need your happiness and sanity, save money , I mean enough money then leave the house for him. Go with your kid. Get a good lawyer and focus on your business. Take care of yourself and trust me another man will come, maybe not to marry you but to make you atlest happy again. Build yourself.

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Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by Ganjafama(m): 9:12am On Jun 03, 2019
Cutebabiesmum:

my brother, am talking of a Redeemed church pastor. I know my reason of getting worried about telling him. last year, my junior brother(he's just 15 and last born. we are only 3 in family and am the only girl) told me he want to come and spend the long vacation in our house and that night I made favourite dish for my husband, after he finish eating, I knelt down and started praying for him and calling him sweet names, he told me to go straight to the point and i told him my brother is coming to spend the 3rd term vacation in our house,Jesus you need to see how he reacted like the boy will kill him if he come. he said never I should not just dream it. I even told him not to give the boy penny even when he's going back that I will take care of everything, he said no and want to turn it to fight. And he knows am the first born of that family which means most things lies ob my head.
If you are unhappy why not quit the marriage. You can file for custody of your son. I assure you that you'll win custody of the boy because the law favours women in that regard. Marriage no be by force o! Maintaining you sanity is of utmost importance right now

3 Likes

Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by Cutebabiesmum: 1:15pm On Jun 09, 2019
Ganjafama:
If you are unhappy why not quit the marriage. You can file for custody of your son. I assure you that you'll win custody of the boy because the law favours women in that regard. Marriage no be by force o! Maintaining you sanity is of utmost importance right now
Thank you for your advise. My junior brother died few months I open this thread cry it was so painful I swear and I really blamed myself for not acting fast.
Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by ericbertrand(m): 1:50pm On Jun 09, 2019
Cutebabiesmum:

Thank you for your advise. My junior brother died few months I open this thread cry it was so painful I swear and I really blamed myself for not acting fast.
I'm sorry for your loss. May God comfort you and your family.
Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by tabithababy(f): 1:59pm On Jun 09, 2019
Cutebabiesmum:

Thank you for your advise. My junior brother died few months I open this thread cry it was so painful I swear and I really blamed myself for not acting fast.
.

Don't tell me your brother died because your husband didn't want him to come over shocked
Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by Cutebabiesmum: 2:19pm On Jun 09, 2019
ericbertrand:
I'm sorry for your loss. May God comfort you and your family.
Thank you sir
Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by Cutebabiesmum: 2:21pm On Jun 09, 2019
tabithababy:
.

Don't tell me your brother died because your husband didn't want him to come over shocked
It was already late before he agreed to let him come. He died 2 days after he came to my house in lagos
Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by cococandy(f): 2:27pm On Jun 09, 2019
Are you still in that marriage?

Cutebabiesmum:

It was already late before he agreed to let him come. He died 2 days after he came to my house in lagos

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Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by LadySarah: 2:27pm On Jun 09, 2019
Cutebabiesmum:

It was already late before he agreed to let him come. He died 2 days after he came to my house in lagos

Accept my condolence dear.It is well indeed.
Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by cococandy(f): 2:27pm On Jun 09, 2019
Here’s one

Odoyo
desoul2004:
Madam, most of all these ladies who are giving you negative advises are suffering more than you in their own relationship. Life generally is not easy anywhere you go. Kindly pray for your marriage/husband, he might not even know the gravity of what he's doing.

6 Likes

Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by Cutebabiesmum: 2:35pm On Jun 09, 2019
LadySarah:


Accept my condolence dear.It is well indeed.
Thank you ma
Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by Cutebabiesmum: 2:39pm On Jun 09, 2019
cococandy:
Are you still in that marriage?

Yes ma but am planning to move out because I don't want to hurt myself again. This January I attempted suicide but thank God for our landlord son that came at that moment to ask for pressing iron and he rushed me to hospital. I believe if I continue with him, I can still try the suicide again and may not be lucky
Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by cococandy(f): 4:06pm On Jun 09, 2019
Additionally, you need mental healthcare. Is there someone you can talk to? Suicidal ideation isn’t something to be brushed under the carpet
Cutebabiesmum:

Yes ma but am planning to move out because I don't want to hurt myself again. This January I attempted suicide but thank God for our landlord son that came at that moment to ask for pressing iron and he rushed me to hospital. I believe if I continue with him, I can still try the suicide again and may not be lucky

2 Likes

Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by desoul2004(m): 4:39pm On Jun 09, 2019
cococandy:
Here’s one

Odoyo


Really!
Check your pm.
Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by cococandy(f): 5:01pm On Jun 09, 2019
undecided
desoul2004:


Really!
Check your pm.

1 Like

Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by lilyheaven: 5:34pm On Jun 09, 2019
It's not good to be too cold, you saw your husband as your lord, which is very good, but he doesn't love you.
And he has never loved you, even your heart didn't except him, but you didn't listen to your heart rather you followed your pastor and you are still following pastor.
Is time you follow your heart, think about the things that will make you happy, and do, take a vacation, travel and have fun with your son.
Rearrange the house to your taste. Carry yourself like a queen.
Have your prayer time not with your pastor or anyone, just you, you alone. Open your heart to your creator , tell him everything you are going through.
Sing that best song of yours each time depression comes knocking.
You will be fine.
Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by frozen70(f): 4:14pm On Jun 16, 2019
I am still wandering what you are doing with such a man after reading your story

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Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by czarina(f): 6:40pm On Jun 16, 2019
This should be one of the saddest threads on Nairaland. cry

Op, really sorry for all you've been through... So sorry embarassed

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Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by sinie: 7:21pm On Jun 16, 2019
WHY? WHY WILL YOU PUT YOURSELF THROUGH THIS

I dont understand at all, why will you stay with a man that clearly detests you and worse still remain in a marriage that is already over.

is it love? Pls help me understand....

Cutebabiesmum:
Hi everyone, I need an advise from you please. my marriage is 7 years old with a son. I and my husband doesn't love ourselves anymore, infact I will say I married the wrong man. He cheat without any sign of remorse and each time I catch him cheating he will be very annoy and will tell me I will beg him, of course I normally go down on my knee to beg him. I told our pastor(I hate calling him pastor) about his behaviour and he told me men are always right and it is a man's world so I should be the one doing the begging. ok that's fine and good but that doesn't make him to love me or see me as anything. Each time I ask myself what is it that am not doing right, and several times I have asked him while kneeling down to tell me what am not doing right but he will always say nothing. I have my business that is fetching me money so I don't ask him money and he doesn't give me too. something happened last year, his girlfriend confronted me telling me I won't have a second child. when he came back, I told him what his girlfriend told me and I expected him to at least tell me he's sorry. But he asked me why did I abuse the girl first which I didn't do. I told my parent because the girl also threatened to kill me and my mum called him and told him to divorce me if he know he's tired of the marriage. He got angry and abuse all my family, I didn't answer him. Now my junior brother is sick( my parent has spent a lot) and I suggested they bring him to lagos so that I will take them to LASUTH or LUTH. The question is how do I tell a man that doesn't love me or my family that my junior brother is coming to spend some days in his house so I can take them to hospital. Thanks for reading

1 Like

Re: How Do I Tell Hubby I Want My Sick Brother To Come To Lagos by Trickstreat: 7:55pm On Jun 16, 2019
I weep in my heart reading this...... This is so sad sad

Accept my condolences.

What else can I add. Enough advice has been given. It's left for you to take action.

Am more concerned about your safety. Please save up money and leave for your own good and for your son.
God forbid if anything happens to you, your innocent son will suffer in the hands of this man and his mistress.

Am advising you as I would to my own blood.

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