Wednesday 4th April 2018

Morning Vibes With Dr. Jerry - the First

Hello and welcome to #MorningVibesWithDrJerryTheFirst-Episode 203

Title: Emotionally Stable People Don’t Do These 5 Things

I recently, got an inquiry from a reader who wanted to know what things that emotionally stable people don't do and so this post is in answer to his question

It is important to remind us that emotionally stable people are those who are in touch with their realities in the present and using that to build a solid and better future. They refuse to hold on to old habits that would hold them back.

This post is for the general public to benefit from and not only the reader that asked the question because I presume that emotional stability is something all of us struggle with at times.

Here are 6 things that emotionally stable people don’t do:

1. They don’t take other people’s behavior personally.

It’s easy to feel unloved and unwanted when people aren’t able to communicate and connect with you in the way you expect. And it’s so hard not to internalize that disconnection as a reflection on your worth.

But the truth is, the way other people behave and function is not about you.

Most people are so caught up in their own problems, responsibilities and struggles, that the thought of asking you how you’re doing doesn’t even cross their mind.

They aren’t being mean or uncaring – they’re just busy and a bit self-centered at times and that’s okay. It’s not evidence of some fundamental flaw on your part. It doesn’t make you unlovable or unworthy. It just means that some people aren’t very good at looking beyond their own egocentric bubble.

But the fact that you are – that despite the darkness you feel, you have the ability to share your love and light with others – is an incredible strength.

2. They don’t just react – they respond mindfully.

A reaction is a hot, thoughtless, in-the-moment burst of emotion that’s usually driven by our ego (we’re more likely to react when we’re disconnected from our rational mind).

It might last just a split second before our intuition kicks in and offers some perspective, or it might take over to the point that we act on it.

When we feel angry or flustered after dealing with a situation or person, that’s a sign we’ve reacted rather than responded mindfully.

Responding mindfully will leave you feeling like you handled things with integrity and poise.

3. They don’t get stuck thinking the world is ending.

Sometimes the darkest times can bring you to the brightest places. Your most painful struggles can grant you the greatest growth and the most heartbreaking losses of relationships can make room for the most wonderful people.

What seems like a curse at the moment can actually be a blessing in disguise.

What seems like the end of the road is actually just the realization that you are meant to travel a different path.

No matter how difficult things seem, there’s always hope. And no matter how powerless you feel or how horrible things seem, you can’t give up.

You have to keep going. Even when it’s scary, even when all your strength seems gone, you have to keep picking yourself back up and moving forward, because whatever you’re battling in the moment, it will pass, and you will make it through.

You’ve made it this far, and you’ve felt this way before.

Think about it. Remember that time a while back when you thought the world was ending? It didn’t. And it isn’t ending this time either.

4. They don’t tie their present emotions to past negativity.

When we’re in the ‘here and now,’ it’s much easier to cope with emotions and see them as just that: emotions.

If we get caught up obsessing over the past, emotions and situations can take on new (and untrue) meanings as they become attached to stories.

For example, imagine you just got turned down for a new job.

Naturally you’re disappointed. But if you’re not present with that emotion, and instead try to act like a tough girl or guy by burying it, the mind delves back into your past for all the other times you’ve felt that way.

Now you feel like a failure and you start to carry a feeling of unworthiness into every future job interview.

When we stay present, we’re empowered to start fresh every moment and we can see every situation with a sharpened perspective, which allows us to grow beyond the negative emotions (and outcomes) standing in our way.

5. They don’t spew hate at themselves.

When you catch yourself drowning in self-hate, you must remind yourself that you were not born feeling this way.

At some point in the past some person or experience sent you the message that something is wrong with you, and you internalized this lie and accepted it as your truth.

But that lie isn’t yours to carry, and those judgments aren’t about you.

In the same way you learned to think negatively of yourself, you can learn to think new, positive, and self-loving thoughts.

You can learn to challenge those false beliefs, strip away their power, and reclaim your self-respect.

It won’t be easy, and it won’t transpire overnight.

But it is possible. And it begins when you decide that there has to be a better way to live, and that you deserve to discover it.

And of course, if you're struggling with any of these points, remember that you are not alone.

We are all in this together.

Many of us are right there with you, working hard to feel better, think more clearly, and keep our lives on track.

Until I come your way again, this is #MorningVibesWithDrJerryTheFirst

Keep it coming!!!

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