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/CRACK YA RIBS/ ¤Funny Jokes 100%¤ - Jokes Etc - Nairaland

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/CRACK YA RIBS/ ¤Funny Jokes 100%¤ by SenhorSean(m): 2:47pm On May 01, 2018
Being tired, Having mood swings or a boring day?
Laugh it off!

*************


Always share and read jokes here...
laughing daily is the best medicine for long life.
Who knows u might be saving a life....as well change someone's mood.
Re: /CRACK YA RIBS/ ¤Funny Jokes 100%¤ by SenhorSean(m): 2:53pm On May 01, 2018
(1) When you were born your father named you Isreal, your mother called you ayomide, and now your username is naughtyboi92... Now who is stupid?

(2) wickedness is when you ask a girl for her number, but she gives you a wrong number, on getting home you call and a native doctor picks up the call, then you
mistakenly say hello my love..... Spiritual slap is involved.


(3) Nothing pains in this life than when you want to throw away a gala
sachet, and you mistakenly throway your 1000 naira note along Lagos-ibadan expressway


(4) RIP is when your mother is frying garri and you see a goat eating the
cassava, then you pick a stone and throw, but it
mistakingly hit your mother on the head


(5) When Angel Gabriel will finally blow the trumpet, all our politicians will go to hell fire, because they will be busy looting and they
won't hear the trumpet


(6) when you are sitting alone and you hear
somebody call your name, but you look round and find no one, don't panic your village people just bought a new
microphone


(7) my grandmother came to me and said
that her phone ringing tone is finished, I asked her to give me some
money let me go and download another one for her...... All the money she collected from my
grandfather when she was young, I'll collect
them back


(cool I nearly died when I watched Nollywood
movie and saw Tonto Dike and Oge Okoye used as angels of God


(9) When I was in primary school, I had two friends Solomon and Wisdom,
but they repeated primary 3, three times each.


(10) Success is not until you have seven cars,
two helicopters and a mansion, success is also when you are the first to comment on a nairaland topic on the first page and you have 2500 likes and 1500 shares to your comment.


(11) Even Rats sef want to be among the richest animals, a rat entered my
room, instead of going to where I kept my crayfish
and dry fish, its was heading toward my 500naira note.... Na kill I kill am.

3 Likes

Re: /CRACK YA RIBS/ ¤Funny Jokes 100%¤ by Chepos1(m): 3:08pm On May 01, 2018
SenhorSean:
(1) When you were born your father named you Isreal, your mother called you ayomide, and now your username is naughtyboi92... Now who is stupid?

(2) wickedness is when you ask a girl for her number, but she gives you a wrong number, on getting home you call and a native doctor picks up the call, then you
mistakenly say hello my love..... Spiritual slap is involved.


(3) Nothing pains in this life than when you want to throw away a gala
sachet, and you mistakenly throway your 1000 naira note along Lagos-ibadan expressway


(4) RIP is when your mother is frying garri and you see a goat eating the
cassava, then you pick a stone and throw, but it
mistakingly hit your mother on the head


(5) When Angel Gabriel will finally blow the trumpet, all our politicians will go to hell fire, because they will be busy looting and they
won't hear the trumpet


(6) when you are sitting alone and you hear
somebody call your name, but you look round and find no one, don't panic your village people just bought a new
microphone


(7) my grandmother came to me and said
that her phone ringing tone is finished, I asked her to give me some
money let me go and download another one for her...... All the money she collected from my
grandfather when she was young, I'll collect
them back


(cool I nearly died when I watched Nollywood
movie and saw Tonto Dike and Oge Okoye used as angels of God


(9) When I was in primary school, I had two friends Solomon and Wisdom,
but they repeated primary 3, three times each.


(10) Success is not until you have seven cars,
two helicopters and a mansion, success is also when you are the first to comment on a nairaland topic on the first page and you have 2500 likes and 1500 shares to your comment.


(11) Even Rats sef want to be among the richest animals, a rat entered my
room, instead of going to where I kept my crayfish
and dry fish, its was heading toward my 500naira note.... Na kill I kill am.

Very dry
Re: /CRACK YA RIBS/ ¤Funny Jokes 100%¤ by SenhorSean(m): 3:15pm On May 01, 2018
Chepos1:

Very dry
grin grin grin SMH... WHO ASK YOU?
Re: /CRACK YA RIBS/ ¤Funny Jokes 100%¤ by SenhorSean(m): 8:31pm On May 03, 2018
1. My friend wrote an application letter, instead of writing dear MADAM , he mistakenly wrote dear
MADMAN Hope he’s still getting the job.

2. When a guy doesn’t
love you anymore you will hear things like … baby why did you step on my shadow ? Do you want to injure my spirit ? It’s over please!


3. It’s only in NIGERIA
people will knock on your
door and still uses their mouth to do “ko-ko-ko” Nigerians…. But Y?



4. My friend when your crush finally texts you and say “Hi how are you?” Do not waste time just reply “I’m single and you?” I repeat do not waste time.


5. When you treat your woman nicely, God will
bless you with another one . Am I making any sense?


6. Dear smokers,
The kidney you are damaging with cigarette, why not sell it and buy G-wagon


7. Abeg I hate people replying me with “hmmmm” during chats or bringing it into our chats… It makes me remember the money
I lost in MMM.


8. Ladies imagine walking into heaven & the kids
you aborted shouts. “Angel Gabriel..!! na she be that..! See her see her!!! Na she b dat!!!!



9. Because a girl replied u
with “thanks love ” You now rush to inbox her. Now she snubbed u.
U see as u disgrace urself•



10. Women behave mature and intelligent during d period of pregnancy Because at d same time her body have 2 brains, the child’s &
her own.
Re: /CRACK YA RIBS/ ¤Funny Jokes 100%¤ by damisadaprol(f): 8:07pm On May 05, 2018
Chepos1:


Very dry
that's a lie.... Read them and even laughed ou loud.
Re: /CRACK YA RIBS/ ¤Funny Jokes 100%¤ by Chepos1(m): 11:22pm On May 05, 2018
damisadaprol:
that's a lie.... Read them and even laughed ou loud.

Hian! ARE U ME, ARE ME U, ME ARE U? sad
Re: /CRACK YA RIBS/ ¤Funny Jokes 100%¤ by Silentscreamer(f): 9:50pm On May 07, 2018
Hahaha.. Very funny. Why someone said dis jokes are dry is beyond me.

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