1. Gets drunk. A

nd I mean throw up, pass out, take off her panties in public because she foolishly wore the lacy black ones that itch, drunk — interspersed, of course, with much wise and depressing man hating advice that has the power to sink its teeth into unwary bystanders like some sort of horrific landshark. This can be a one night thing or a self destructive phase depending on the girl and the severity of the break up, but I have yet to meet or become friends with a girl who has not done this in one form or another. It’s as necessary as crappy love songs and chocolate/ice cream binging.