Hello everyone,
Did is a very depressing story happening now, pls ur contributions would or might be taken seriously..... Probably it might help. Please contribute wisely, God bless u as u give ur candit advice.

A man of about age 36 met a lady of about 31 years @a certain public location, d man ask d lady out, dey exchange contact. @dia first outing, d man told d lady his story of how his supposed ex-wife packed all of his belongings upto spoons thrice after dia dispute over flimsy marital issues. At d 1st & 2nd instance d man would beg her n return her back, they will HV to buy new sets of electronics and households bx d she would HV sold them or dash dem out. Finally, d supposed ex wife said d marriage is not of God and DAT she cannot stay in d ax with d man, she packed out everything again, left dia abode community and located a distance place to reside (she even worked her transfer from via abode community). Although d man does not have a Job but he earns a very meagre sum from assisting d supposed ex-wife Sister's husband (like 25k monthly), while d supposed ex wife is a government school teacher. D both of dem are graduates and dey HV lived like DAT together for 4years until last year February wen she packed out for d 3rd time.

The man was fed up, he went to ask d family of d supposed ex wife for divorce n return of bride's price, d family gave him no consolation but chase him out.

In July last year he met d new lady told her d story and ask to marry her, d lady accepted. They told d lady's parent d issues. Questions were asked, but d man never thought his ex-wife would bring up issues again, so he constantly reassure his new in-laws n proposed bride DAT dere will be no problems.

They got married in December last year and dey were happy, trying to restructure dia lives n activate plans for dia future when d ex-wife brought a law suit against d man and his new wife, making claims of up to 7million in march (exactly 3months after dia marriage). As it is d man does not HV d financial enablement to make case with her, d ex wife has also gone ahead to sue d pastors DAT conducted d marriage and d lady's father, for allowing d marriage and she is making claims.

Now d new wife's family wants her to leave d man's ax and come back home. They are saying d man shd go settle with his ex wife dia divorce matters. D family of d new wife are insisting dia daughter leaves d ax now. But d man does not have father & mother to speak for him (extended families too of d man are not sincerely concern about him)

My question is...... What should the new wife do?

Already the new wife parents are making moves to withdraw the issue from court but they are insisting dia daughter leaves d man, claiming DAT d man is not a true xtain or he shd cm to dia church. Whereas, d lady knows DAT d man is a xtain but d problems of life HV made him backslide a little.
Note dat, d man does not smoke, drink or womanize...... He has bad temper dou & he just don't HV a Job yet but d guy dey hustle small small.

Please make ur contributions......
D lady (new wife) is really confuse

My Dear, some women are naturally trouble some.

But this is a Family Issue.

To be frank, THIS IS THE TRUE DEFINITION OF LOVE.

If the new couples truly love themselves, this is a time to stand up and fight for their marriage.

Forget about Extended Family, they will always want to protect their own first.

But if truly she had a conviction and believes in that marriage, then she should stand with her man.

I also blame the man for choosing to remain in same position and locality where the first wife left him. I personally think the first wife is smarter than him.

I suggest the Husband relocates to another city and start a new life. Sometimes you need to leave your comfort zone in order to succeed.

The new woman should have made proper investigations before entering an institution as binding as marriage. As far as the law is concerned, the man is still married to the WIFE. And as such, her (the new woman's) marriage to the man in question is not recognised.

Let the man sort the problem with his wife first, just as her family members have said.




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CMaritalAffairs:
We understand that she made a huge mistake (DAT is ignorance for us) and she should be blamed and even the rest of her family members, the man & his family inclusive, even the church and the pastors involved. But leaving the man after 7months of just wedded, don't u think is embarrassing? She does not HV a personal issue with the man, if she leaves and d man handle d case alone of dia joint mistake, will that be right? She is age 31, is it possible and easy for her to fix or get another relationship leading to marriage soon?
We understand Nigerian families- how long can dey abode her b4 dey will start attacking her emotionally? What about society/her work place, will they tolerate such? Bx she cannot be telling everybody d reason for leaving her just married home?
Main while, her parents are making effort to appease d ex wife and settle d issue out of court, if she desert her new home, won't it affect her in the future even in this marriage?

This really curious
She can't even say it out to any one
Please your contributions are valued, help save someone from depression and help her make the right decision.
Right now she is in a Fix Dilemma.... Her family / the man/ doing d right thing.

Once again ur contributions are valued
Thanks

I had headache trying to decipher what was written. I mean no disrespect. I wish to help.

esegiftbebor:
This really curious
She can't even say it out to any one
Please your contributions are valued, help save someone from depression and help her make the right decision.
Right now she is in a Fix Dilemma.... Her family / the man/ doing d right thing.

Once again ur contributions are valued
Thanks

Poster many people who would have contributed cannot understand the abbreviations, I advise in future that you write full words instead of abbreviations so people can read well and reply.


First of all there is no actual marriage because the man was still married legally and till he gets a divorce from the first wife and remarries her.

I advise that the man and his family pursue an amicable settlement with the estranged wife, beg her, bribe her if possible to give a divorce if she doesn't want the man again but if she still wants the man there might be tricky.

The lady involved should not stay in depression, she made a mistake and it is not the end of life, legally she was never married and she should not let her age discourage her from moving on if it comes to that.

The man and his wife may settle their differences.

I had to read other people’s comments to understand what you where trying to say. It hurt my eyes trying to read your post. Sorry I don’t know what to say

She just believed everything the man told her hook, line and sinker without making proper findings? Huh? No be today some yeye Nigerian men don dey run dual marital life. As the thing don cast so, you gotta leave the man! EOD!

While your wordings and phrase are horrible, this story is actually sad.

How do woman jam men like this and kiakia do wedding with them?? If a relationship lasts longer than two years and ends, anyone entering into a new relationship with either former lovers should ask vital questions.
The other woman probably selfishly left due to monetary issues and wanted to get her act together or wait till the man starts having money and comes back to beg her. Only to hear that the man don jam another babe!!
The people who would have told her about the wedding will forget to add his pain and disillusion when she left him for the third time.
Me, I don't blame the man, I blame the new woman and her family. She is obviously desperate to be married at 31 and refused to ask obviously vital questions.
Just watch, whether she goes or not, she will soon see the man with clearer eyes. In any case, their marriage is null! He is married to someone else and until he divorces her properly, she is just the mistress.

I read every word in your post, and,

not only did you get married 5 months after meeting him {you met in July and were married in December}, which is too soon, you married a man whom you knew was and is still legally married to the other woman/his wife {because he did tell you and you family about her). I don't have any advice for you, sorry.

Quiescere:
I read every word in your post, and,

not only did you get married 5 months after meeting him {you met in July and were married in December}, which is too soon, you married a man whom you knew was and is still legally married to the other woman/his wife {because he did tell you and you family about her). I don't have any advice for you, sorry.

Piss off if you have no advise for her.....you sanctimonious over religious foooooooooools parading NL...commenting like kids....she has made a mistake and so what?...badly raised niggress...


@Op....your husband has a very strong ground for divorce..according to the law..any couple that has stayed apart for 2years can comfortably divorce...its not debatable.....tell your husband to also request for the return of the bride price and initiate a divorce.

Thank goodness the union never produced any child...and he should stand his ground..that woman will never eat where she did not sow.

coolcatty:


Piss off if you have no advise for her.....you sanctimonious over religious foooooooooools parading NL...commenting like kids....she has made a mistake and so what?...badly raised niggress...


@Op....your husband has a very strong ground for divorce..according to the law..any couple that has stayed apart for 2years can comfortably divorce...its not debatable.....tell your husband to also request for the return of the bride price and initiate a divorce.

Thank goodness the union never produced any child...and he should stand his ground..that woman will never eat where she did not sow.

Dear imbeciile, if I piss off, can you also do me a favour and go hug your nearest transformer? I'm not responsible for your frustrations in life.

Quiescere:

Dear imbeciile, if I piss off, can you also do me a favour and go hug your nearest transformer? I'm not responsible for your frustrations in life.

Bleeding mooooron

Fool.

coolcatty:


Bleeding mooooron