Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,143,161 members, 7,780,138 topics. Date: Thursday, 28 March 2024 at 10:08 AM

4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid - Family - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid (31736 Views)

7 Reasons Why Nigerian Marriages Are Crashing In The UK / Many Nigerian Marriages Have Ended Long Ago – Pastor Kinsgley Okonkwo / 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (Reply) (Go Down)

4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by Opinionated: 1:01pm On Nov 02, 2018
A lot of people have been married for years but still find it very difficult to get their finances in order.

This might be due to various reasons such as the famous, ‘your money is our money and my money is my money’ that most Nigerian ladies not just say, but usually adhere to when they get married, and other problems that would be explained in this post.

Money problems in marriage are pretty much expected, but they’re easy to avoid at the same time if you can avoid these 4 financial problems in marriage.

Not sharing expenses

This is one of the major money problems a lot of marriages experience in Nigeria. Despite the fact that a lot of young people now have access to information that is relevant to financial independence, a lot of women still assume the husband should bare most if not all the expenses.

However, splitting the financial responsibility to an equal 50/50 is not realistic because women have expenses that men will never have to worry about. At the same time both partners rarely make the same income.

Therefore, a better approach would be to look at the overall expenses and income of the family, and then come up with a budget that works for both partners. Paying for all the expenses by one partner might come with good intentions from the start, but after a while it would create tension and pressure.

Keeping money secrets

It is no brainer that keeping money secret is not healthy for any relationship. Not only would it ruin the trust, it could also lead to resentment from the offended partner.

This does not just apply to keeping secrets about some extra cash you have somewhere, it also includes not letting your partner know you have loan to be paid, if you have one. It might seem embarrassing but it’s the right thing to do. That way you would be able to figure out a better and easier repayment plan which might include your partner helping you pay some of it and vice versa.

You should also let your partner know your credit score, as this would help both of you when you want to apply for a loan together for a new home or other heavy purchase.

Leaving one partner to manage the money

In a lot of Nigerian marriages, one partner manages the money and that is usually the husband and recently the wife. This is fine when that is done because the partner managing the money is better at money management, but that does not mean you should leave the entire money
decision and management to just your partner. Sometime s budgeting and keeping records of expenses can be overwhelming, so you need to work together to ease the stress. Also, anything can happen to the partner who manages the money, would you be fine financially without your partner?

You might not know the full details of how every Naira is spent, but at the very least, you should know how to access your money in the event of an emergency.

Not budgeting properly

As stated earlier about splitting expenses, having a budget in place will help you figure out how to manage the family expenses. Write down all of your income and expenses, once you have all this info, you can decide how the expenses will be split. Don’t forget to budget savings e.g. travel, and short-term major purchases for a car or a home.

Also, be prepared to review and change your budget when the need arises like when you get a raise, or an addition to the family. When such changes happen try and see how you can save more or where you can cut expenses depending on what the situation is at the time.

However, if you realize that you and your partner are not good at managing money, you should visit a financial institution for financial advice on how to manage your money. In most cases, getting financial advice is free.

Finally, note that marriage and money are never easy but can be quite satisfying when you have it clearly stated out and in control through proper planning and consistent efforts towards your financial freedom as a couple.

Source: 4 Money Problems in Nigerian Marriages to Avoid

17 Likes 1 Share

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by oladotman(m): 1:10pm On Nov 02, 2018
FTC grin grin
Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by Edmondd(m): 1:10pm On Nov 02, 2018
Let me call my wife. She has to read number 1.

Christmas is at the corner, you really need our service. Reach us for your interior decorations including curtains and window blinds and other home accessories. Tel/WhatsApp 07013038612.

3 Likes

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by ct2: 1:10pm On Nov 02, 2018
I don't even know the rubbish to write
Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by MrHighSea: 1:11pm On Nov 02, 2018
Better bare it all, IF TRUST HAVE BEEN ESTABLISHED.
When there is dough, let her know, pop champagne.
When dough depletes, let her know, share a bottle of coke.
If she vex, she is wrong.

21 Likes 1 Share

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by oladotman(m): 1:11pm On Nov 02, 2018
Finally....... smiley
Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by fghanni(m): 1:12pm On Nov 02, 2018
Noted!
Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by TooNoisy(f): 1:13pm On Nov 02, 2018
Money is a major cause of problems for African marriages, so intending couples should discuss about how family expenses will be paid. There is no perfect remedy, all I can is that couples need to be open, transparent and fair to both parties. Your priority should first of all be your immediate (nuclear) family, and outsiders should be a distant second especially when you start having children.

Having said that, the man should even be more prudent in spending money. Women have needs that men will never have, so it is important for a man to understand these needs and ensure that his wife looks and feels good with herself - depending on what he can afford. I also encourage couples to invest early and wisely, property and shares are a good place to start.

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by bigkahuna704(m): 1:13pm On Nov 02, 2018
1. Avoid Poverty

2 Likes

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by engrMikemd(m): 1:13pm On Nov 02, 2018
Nice write-up

1 Like

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by obajoey(m): 1:14pm On Nov 02, 2018
Wife be like 'his money is our money, my money is my money' sebi na jejely i dey my papa house wey him con carry me.

13 Likes 3 Shares

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by GGirll: 1:15pm On Nov 02, 2018
Good o e OP thank you
Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by wink2015(m): 1:15pm On Nov 02, 2018
Opinionated:
A lot of people have been married for years but still find it very difficult to get their finances in order.

This might be due to various reasons such as the famous, ‘your money is our money and my money is my money’ that most Nigerian ladies not just say, but usually adhere to when they get married, and other problems that would be explained in this post.

Money problems in marriage are pretty much expected, but they’re easy to avoid at the same time if you can avoid these 4 financial problems in marriage.

Not sharing expenses

This is one of the major money problems a lot of marriages experience in Nigeria. Despite the fact that a lot of young people now have access to information that is relevant to financial independence, a lot of women still assume the husband should bare most if not all the expenses.

However, splitting the financial responsibility to an equal 50/50 is not realistic because women have expenses that men will never have to worry about. At the same time both partners rarely make the same income.

Therefore, a better approach would be to look at the overall expenses and income of the family, and then come up with a budget that works for both partners. Paying for all the expenses by one partner might come with good intentions from the start, but after a while it would create tension and pressure.

Keeping money secrets

It is no brainer that keeping money secret is not healthy for any relationship. Not only would it ruin the trust, it could also lead to resentment from the offended partner.

This does not just apply to keeping secrets about some extra cash you have somewhere, it also includes not letting your partner know you have loan to be paid, if you have one. It might seem embarrassing but it’s the right thing to do. That way you would be able to figure out a better and easier repayment plan which might include your partner helping you pay some of it and vice versa.

You should also let your partner know your credit score, as this would help both of you when you want to apply for a loan together for a new home or other heavy purchase.

Leaving one partner to manage the money

In a lot of Nigerian marriages, one partner manages the money and that is usually the husband and recently the wife. This is fine when that is done because the partner managing the money is better at money management, but that does not mean you should leave the entire money
decision and management to just your partner. Sometime s budgeting and keeping records of expenses can be overwhelming, so you need to work together to ease the stress. Also, anything can happen to the partner who manages the money, would you be fine financially without your partner?

You might not know the full details of how every Naira is spent, but at the very least, you should know how to access your money in the event of an emergency.

Not budgeting properly

As stated earlier about splitting expenses, having a budget in place will help you figure out how to manage the family expenses. Write down all of your income and expenses, once you have all this info, you can decide how the expenses will be split. Don’t forget to budget savings e.g. travel, and short-term major purchases for a car or a home.

Also, be prepared to review and change your budget when the need arises like when you get a raise, or an addition to the family. When such changes happen try and see how you can save more or where you can cut expenses depending on what the situation is at the time.

However, if you realize that you and your partner are not good at managing money, you should visit a financial institution for financial advice on how to manage your money. In most cases, getting financial advice is free.

Finally, note that marriage and money are never easy but can be quite satisfying when you have it clearly stated out and in control through proper planning and consistent efforts towards your financial freedom as a couple.

Source: 4 Money Problems in Nigerian Marriages to Avoid




INSTEAD OF RUSHING TO GO AND TAKE PRE-WEDDING PHOTOS.

Couples should spend their time reading motivational books and get themselves educated on how to manage their marriage.

Pre-Wedding photos will not save a marriage problem it is just for the fun of the moment then later you are faced with the true challenges of marriage.

@Opinionated

Thanks for the share!

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by BESUNHomesLTD: 1:18pm On Nov 02, 2018
Good write up!
Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by izzy4shizzy(m): 1:19pm On Nov 02, 2018
Which kind topic be this
Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by tuwayz(m): 1:20pm On Nov 02, 2018
I just hope Nigerian ladies will listen to this, but many will not because of this african mentality that have got deep in them that a man is responsible for all the bills at home, so pathetic.

2 Likes

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by tstx(m): 1:20pm On Nov 02, 2018
Ok
Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by TRUSTEDGUY: 1:20pm On Nov 02, 2018
Naija women too like money. Na top agenda for them in marriage.

2 Likes

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by CapussoSeba: 1:23pm On Nov 02, 2018
smiley
Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by Amoj4682: 1:24pm On Nov 02, 2018
obajoey:
Wife be like 'his money is our money, my money is my money' sebi na jejely i dey my papa house wey him con carry me.

Lol. You are right

2 Likes

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by GOFRONT(m): 1:27pm On Nov 02, 2018
shocked

Ordinary date wen I dey date my girlfriend, she wan use her younger brothers' wahala kill me....

Abeg I wan marry lady wen no get younger brothers n sisters......I don learn

17 Likes 1 Share

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by Nobody: 1:30pm On Nov 02, 2018
Good job. Women hearken to this advice so as to have a wonderful home. Men work hard to take care of your kids. In relationship, this should be inculcated. The idea of the guy spending on you will face away with time. Ladies be smart if you want to keep your man.

1 Like

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by Rozay19(f): 1:32pm On Nov 02, 2018
fghanni:
Noted!
O
Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by ednut1(m): 1:37pm On Nov 02, 2018
Marriage in the olden days
-man foots d bills leaves all the chores and care for the woman.
Marriage today
-both earn/ work and the man still expects the women to do same thing as women who dont earn. Baba kolework grin . Women are not slaves

11 Likes

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by Nobody: 1:38pm On Nov 02, 2018
Only men who support feminism should share bills with their wives.

You can't be claiming mr head of the home and captain then you'll now be hoping to share bills. God punish you!

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by Nobody: 1:40pm On Nov 02, 2018
ednut1:
Marriage in the olden days
-man foots d bills leaves all the chores and care for the woman.
Marriage today
-both earn/ work and the man still expects the women to do same thing as women who dont earn. Baba kolework grin . Women are not slaves

Most Nigerian women work but still don't contribute.

Be realistic

6 Likes

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by chris31(m): 1:44pm On Nov 02, 2018
TooNoisy:
Money is a major cause of problems for African marriages, so intending couples should discuss about how family expenses will be paid. There is no perfect remedy, all I can is that couples need to be open, transparent and fair to both parties. Your priority should first of all be your immediate (nuclear) family, and outsiders should be a distant second especially when you start having children.

Having said that, the man should even be more prudent in spending money. Women have needs that men will never have, so it is important for a man to understand these needs and ensure that his wife looks and feels good with herself - depending on what he can afford. I also encourage couples to invest early and wisely, property and shares are a good place to start.
And u think that Men don't have needs right?
This is how u women deceives urselfs
Marriage should be 55 - 45 these days

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by ednut1(m): 1:46pm On Nov 02, 2018
Elder0001:


Most Nigerian women work but still don't contribute.

Be realistic
true . No wonder men die early grin

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by chris31(m): 1:46pm On Nov 02, 2018
ednut1:
Marriage in the olden days
-man foots d bills leaves all the chores and care for the woman.
Marriage today
-both earn/ work and the man still expects the women to do same thing as women who dont earn. Baba kolework grin . Women are not slaves
I dey pity u guy
Na ur type woman dey turn to houseboy

5 Likes

Re: 4 Money Problems In Nigerian Marriages To Avoid by Nobody: 1:49pm On Nov 02, 2018
ednut1:
Marriage in the olden days
-man foots d bills leaves all the chores and care for the woman.
Marriage today
-both earn/ work and the man still expects the women to do same thing as women who dont earn. Baba kolework grin . Women are not slaves
When you talk about double standards. You get it correctly! Everybody go dey alright sha

3 Likes

(1) (2) (3) (Reply)

24 Things A Mum Teaches Her Daughter Before Marriage!! / I Love My Girlfriend But My Family Don't Want Us To Marry. / My Wife Pushed Me Into Another Woman's Arms

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 45
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.