Trust, the underlying factor in a marriage cant be questioned when one's wife gives birth and the baby is a mirror image of the father. That was one of the determining factors used to establish the paternity of one's child, especially in olden times. But trust can be sabotaged. A woman can easily pin her pregnancy from an adultereous affair, on her unsuspecting husband. However, science is finally catching up with these unfaithful women as men, can now request through conventional means if a child is actually theirs, biologically or not. And in some cases, the old saying, "Only a woman knows the father of her child can easily be validated, not unless the woman had multiple relationships (Povich's show is an example)

But seriously, do you think that DNA has been more of a blessing than a pain? Larry Birkhead can always thank DNA for establishing paternity of her infant daughter, a slap to the cruel and malicious intentions of the mother (yeah, it was very malicious of Ms. Smith to have done so) to have presented her to another man. I am actually in awe that he went at great length to prove that he was the father. Others may have given up, besides, who can always be certain of their paternal rights?

On the other hand, read this story. http://www.nytimes.com/2007/04/10/us/10dna.html?_r=1&pagewanted=2&oref=slogin.

A man's attempt to bring in his children from Ghana ends in a tragedy, because DNA results came out to disprove his long held notion that only one of his four kids, he had invested financially and emotionally, like a dutiful father was his. Angst, despondence, a constant reminder that his late wife was unfaithful to him, perhaps in their marital life has weighed heavily on him, since he was presented with the results. His next move is to petition for them as their step-father. His only biological child from his late wife is in the states with him, while the the 'step-kids' , unaware of their true parternity are in Ghana, and wondering when they can join their 'father'.

If the DNA results had not been used, the Ghanaian would have gleefully believed that all those kids he had raised were actually his, and would have been excited in reuniting with them. DNA has only erased the pain, leaving behind a sense of betrayal. So, while the likes of Birkhead are rejoicing over the established paternity of their infant children, there are others, who are lamenting over the emotional void in their psyche due to the knowledge, courtesy of DNA that the children sired in one's marriage are not actually theirs biologically, but were products of an adulterous relationships.

Is the pain and angst associated with DNA really worth it, or do you consider it to be a blessing?

i think its a blessing. even though they often say that what you dont know wont kill you, i think that truth is better told., however bitter it may be. afterall your whole marriage could be a lie. its better your impostor of a spouse is exposed!

I don't really know. Imagine a man who is impotent and the woman decides to help his ego by "providing" him a child. This man might be aware of his fault. Just try and guess what would happen if by mistake he comes to find out that the child isn't his? His life would be ruined. I think in some cases this DNA things just causes more damage than good.

Like every other thing in life, DNA is both a blessing and a curse with advantages and disadvantages

some get hurt by the outcome, while for some, it makes their day

it depends on which side of the boat you are on

anyone who has nothing to hide shouldnt be scared of DNA.

DNA! Best biological breakthrough of the century.
Thanks to DNA, Larry Birkhead can claim his daughter and not scum bags like Howard Stern. Thanks to DNA innocent people are not sent to jail for crimes not commited. Thanks to DNA we can now treat previously untreatable diseases.

If you are faithful to your partner DNA should be no problem to you.

For me DNA is indeed a blessing,a similar thing happened to a friend of mine and then on I made a matter of policy to test all children I will have without madam's knowledge.Just to make sure,you just can't trust women,some women are still in love with their EX

davidylan:


If you are faithful to your partner DNA should be no problem to you.

I agree, but just a thought

a lady is married to her one and only, she gets raped. Goes to the hospital, results prove her clean.
Couple continue in harmony, moths later she's delivered of a bouncing baby boy, man and wife are all happy to have a son.

Many years later, the boy is not his afterall (thanks to DNA), the tests taken at the hospital were inaccurate, no tests are 100% sure afterall.
It becomes a blessing because they now know the truth, but a curse because the guy might despise his wife for being raped(something that was totally out of her contro), even if he doesn't, it takes an extraordinary man to take in the kid with all opened arms.

Now tell me, in that kind of a situation, does your above statement still apply??

my wife can never be raped God forbid. But in the event it ever happens, it was not madam's fault. No matter how painful i will have to over look it and take whatever baby comes. No need to do a DNA test, even if it turns out negative i wont be giving that baby, my wife's flesh and blood, to a rapist! That is the best i can do to soothe her pain.

@ Davidylan, now isn't your wife(to be) a lucky one?
Unfortunately, not every guy will take the situation that lightly

davidylan:

If you are faithful to your partner DNA should be no problem to you.

still another thought:

a lady breaks up with her lover, gets married to the guy she considers mr.-right.
months later, she's delivered of a baby. Yippie!! everybody is overjoyed. They all live like one big happy family, with more kids during the years

The guy is all-grown-up, married with kids sef. One fateuful evening, driving back from work, gets into an accident. He needs blood transmission. The dad's blood does not match. A DNA is carried out, chei, he's not the father afterall
Unkowing to everyone, including the lady, she was pregnant with her ex-boyfriend before they went their seperate ways.

Thanks to DNA, the man is furious because he feels betrayed by his wife, they actually got married because they found out she was pregnant . The ex. is mad because he lost all these years with his son, years that can never be regained . The son is angryx10 because he grew up with a wrong identity, his mother betrayed him

Actually this lady wasn't unfaithful, just a victim of ill-luck and fate

mrmayor:

For me DNA is indeed a blessing,a similar thing happened to a friend of mine and then on I made a matter of policy to test all children I will have without madam's knowledge.Just to make sure,you just can't trust women,some women are still in love with their EX

why marry someone you dont trust?
i dont get it.

@davidylan
why should a raped woman allow herself to get pregnant?
u are supposed to report to the police station pronto and from there straight to the hospital where they know what to do. the talk of pregnancy and dna wont even arise!

spoilt:

@davidylan
why should a raped woman allow herself to get pregnant?
u are supposed to report to the police station pronto and from there straight to the hospital where they know what to do. the talk of pregnancy and dna wont even arise!

like i said earlier, some people have been victims of inaccurate results, only to later assume the baby came from the hubby

dearie, things happen, sometimes we're unable to control them. That makes us human

cute-ass:

@ Davidylan, now isn't your wife(to be) a lucky one?
Unfortunately, not every guy will take the situation that lightly

still another thought:

a lady breaks up with her lover, gets married to the guy she considers mr.-right.
months later, she's delivered of a baby. Yippie!! everybody is overjoyed. They all live like one big happy family, with more kids during the years

The guy is all-grown-up, married with kids sef. One fateuful evening, driving back from work, gets into an accident. He needs blood transmission. The dad's blood does not match. A DNA is carried out, chei, he's not the father afterall
Unkowing to everyone, including the lady, she was pregnant with her ex-boyfriend before they went their seperate ways.

Thanks to DNA, the man is furious because he feels betrayed by his wife, they actually got married because they found out she was pregnant . The ex. is mad because he lost all these years with his son, years that can never be regained . The son is angryx10 because he grew up with a wrong identity, his mother betrayed him

Actually this lady wasn't unfaithful, just a victim of ill-luck and fate

when a woman sleeps with 2 men days apart, i think she knows the consequences of her action.

cute-ass:

a lady breaks up with her lover, gets married to the guy she considers mr.-right.
months later, she's delivered of a baby. Yippie!! everybody is overjoyed. They all live like one big happy family, with more kids during the years

Actually this lady wasn't unfaithful, just a victim of ill-luck and fate

This cannot happen, i wont marry a woman i havent dated for at least 1yr, within that period i would have known if whatever baby she has belongs to me or her ex because trust me i wont be making the mistake of having a kid outside marriage. Whatever pregnancy she has definitely wont be mine so i wont be having any kid who isnt biologically mine. In that case DNA is not necessary.

spoilt:

@davidylan
why should a raped woman allow herself to get pregnant?
u are supposed to report to the police station pronto and from there straight to the hospital where they know what to do. the talk of pregnancy and dna wont even arise!

You are very right. But just what IF she gets pregnant, i wont be going the abortion road.

Abeg, make una no misconstrue what I had earlier written on the blessings/anguish that DNA has caused. I know that DNA has been a blessing in securing the freedom of innocent prisoners, particularly in the USA. We have read stories of incarcerated black men, who gained their freedom as a result of DNA test. However, the story of the Ghanaian man whose life has taken an emotional tailspin, after DNA results proved that he was not the father of three children that he had supported financially and emotionally could be a negativity. Should the truth have been told him, or should he have wallowed in blissful ignorance that those children were actually his, biologically? Of course now that the truth has been out, the trust that he had on his late wife has been shattered. In its place is angst, anguish, perhaps, bitterness and all sorts of negativity. If you were in your shoes, would you have preferred if the truth had been revealed to you, or would you just prefer to be completely ignorant about it?

As for those who are writing about trust, like some girl who told a respondent that if he had problems trusting his significant other, then he should not marry. I have to tell you that trust, however relevant in a relationship, can be shattered. There are stories of men, who trusted their wife, like the Ghanian man, only to realize through DNA test, that the wife was unfaithful to him, at least in the course of their marriage. Now, how can you reconcile the level of trust that the man had on the wife, and the wife's unfaithfulness?

Mine, trust or no trust, I am doing a DNA test on my kids. I dont want to be upended later on in life that so so and so does not belong to me biologically. It is better to know the truth at a young age, than to be confronted with facts later on in life.

Ndipe:

Mine, trust or no trust, I am doing a DNA test on my kids. I don't want to be upended later on in life that so so and so does not belong to me biologically. It is better to know the truth at a young age, than to be confronted with facts later on in life.

Na wa ndipe,were you burnt in a relationship that would make you have such a poor opinion of women in general.
Going into a relationship with such an attitude doesn't seem right,it's like going to the altar with divorce papers hidden in your glove compartment to make them handy just in case.
Stop watching all those silly sitcoms,dear.

babyosisi:

Na wa ndipe,were you burnt in a relationship that would make you have such a poor opinion of women in general.
Going into a relationship with such an attitude doesn't seem right,it's like going to the altar with divorce papers hidden in your glove compartment to make them handy just in case.
Stop watching all those silly sitcoms,dear.

i think all these home videos are too blame. women are never depicted in goodlight.ever. many men built mistrust not based on previous bad experiences but from the sordid world of nollywood. but then again if you want to live your life like that. goodluck to you.  

lets not deceive ourselves here
who says women are not deceitful  and callous? especially when they've been running around with every tom diick and Harry.if women insist on playing thesame cheating playa games as men then they better be sure babies don't turn out, nothing worse than passing on another Man's child to an unsuspecting man. It happens for real  and as a woman i wont lie and say we are angels. i know some friends or acquaintances who have done similar things and had to abort because they were unsure of the baby's paternity.

Men cheat , not saying it is allowed or ok as some would say its in their make up, i disagree,. we are now seeing alot of women following suit saying rubbish like '' if men can do it why can't we'' what a load of horse dung. if you must then make sure you don't get yourself preggers . When in doubt get a DNA done do not let another man believe it's theirs that is down right cruel.

Home movies depict the real lives of people , thats why i like it , it is no HOLLYWOOD, where things are glossed over, it is real shit, our stories, by us , for us! good and bad, ugly and pretty , nollywood gives you unadulterated real stories, we just got to learn by them.
so as for this topic , whether Dna results are a curse or blessing? well it does not matter as long as the truth is revealed, it not only affects the child involved also families , the truth is painful and can course alot of trouble and embarassement but , it is better in the long term to know the truth

nobody doubts that sisimose but when you have a man going into marriage with someone he supposedly loves with a mindset that he'll DNA test any offsprings proceeding from the union,I dare say that is no marriage.
I don't know any woman that would marry such a man if she knew this hidden agenda.
I would not!.
Not because I'm hiding anything but because marriage is supposed to be based on trust and there's is none here.
This guy is telling us that the woman doesn't have to show signs of infidelity for him to suspect foulplay,in other words she is guilty until proven innocent.

I hope no woman ends up in this situation because this would only be a tip of the iceberg.
She may be sniffed for smiling at the mailman.

babyosisi:

nobody doubts that sisimose but when you have a man going into marriage with someone he supposedly loves with a mindset that he'll DNA test any offsprings proceeding from the union,I dare say that is no marriage.
I don't know any woman that would marry such a man if she knew this hidden agenda.
I would not!.
Not because I'm hiding anything but because marriage is supposed to be based on trust and there's is none here.
This guy is telling us that the woman doesn't have to show signs of infidelity for him to suspect foulplay,in other words she is guilty until proven innocent.

I hope no woman ends up in this situation because this would only be a tip of the iceberg.
She may be sniffed for smiling at the mailman.

nah i just ignored that i agree with you there about the trust thing, all i was just concentrated on was the issue of women passing on other ppl's babies, i should have included that in my post but i got tired at the end, lol. yeah i agree if that sort of thing comes up wiith the man then i think the woman has no bizness marrying someone like him, just cut all that BS before you get into marriage.

spoilt:

why marry someone you don't trust?
i don't get it.

Its called INSURANCE POLICY.If you want to cheat make sure you don't pregnant because I will find out.I tell any woman I date that I will test all my children.One bitten twice shy.
Women cheat/Men cheat