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Tales Of A Keke Napep Driver / Tales Of Abigail / DARK MYSTERIES: SEASON 1 (2) (3) (4)

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★★★ by Nobody: 1:42pm On Mar 27, 2019
All Rights Reserved ©therealakuko 2019





DISCLAIMER: Before proceeding any further.... please be advised that all characters and events referred to herein are nothing but a figment of the writers wild imagination... if by any chance the character of Mfon or Uchechi... or any of the others as portrayed in this story appears to be someone you know... then be rest assured that such is purely coincidental... and by the way, do not hesitate to let me know if you are enjoying the story...GRACIAS





EPISODE 1: MFON WANTS TO BE A MOTHER


So I and Mfon lay in bed that warm night. I had only some days ago happen to stumble upon her diary. "So people still... kept diaries in this 21st century" I had thought. I flipped through the pages and as I read each page's content, I became acquainted with a side of Mfon that has previously been unknown to me.
There on one of the pages, she disclosed that she had lost her virginity at the age of 14. On another page she had written that besides me, there had been four other suitors that had vied for her hand in marriage. She further disclosed that she had decided to settle for me because a dream she had instructed her to do so. A lot of juicy secrets and skeletons were present in that diary. Some were flattering, some just as unflattering. But then again, these are stories for another day.

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Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 1:43pm On Mar 27, 2019
It was from this same diary that I learnt of her life goal of being a mother. I found it rather weird that someone would have such a goal in life. Particularly in an era where the likes of Chimmamanda, Linda Ikeji and co. were making waves. I found this highly unusual to say the least.
As we lay in bed I turned to her and asked with a smirk on my face, "So your life goal is to be a mother?".
I watched her face closely and watched as her eyebrows rose in surprise and then quickly collapsed as she tried to mask her initial reaction by playing dumb. "I don't understand what you mean" she replied in feigned dumbness.
"Na me you dey tell dah one?" I asked her. "So your goal in life is to be a mother?" I asked again. This time, I gave her that look one normally gives another when he knows the other's secret and is trying to point out to the other that being evasive is pointless.


She giggled in embarrassment and replied, "How do you know?"
"Poor girl. She thinks her secrets are still intact" I thought before responding with a vague "I have my ways".

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Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 11:25pm On Mar 27, 2019
I spent some time wondering how it was possible for one to have such life goal and yet rely on the use of contraceptives for the last couple of months that we had been living together as man and wife. If anything she was scoring an own goal... not a life goal. We needed to do something about it so I sat up and gestured towards her. "Oya open your legs. The sooner we score this goal the better"
My attempts at holding her two legs apart was met with mild resistance. The young woman just kept laughing breathlessly as she lay there. "I didn't mean a mother in the biological sense" she said to me.
"Ehn?" I asked in bewilderment. "Which one is biological sense again?" I asked again. "When I said my goal in life is to be a mother, I meant that in a spiritual sense not in a biological sense" she said.
"This your spiritual sense is not making sense" I said. Of course I didn't say that out loud, that was something I said with my mind's mouth. I just kept staring at her trying to make sense of the gibberish she was saying when I had what could be regarded as an epiphany.

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Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 11:31pm On Mar 27, 2019
I found myself transported centuries into the future. It was like a tunnel radiant with colours of the rainbow. I emerged from the tunnel's end and found myself in the midst of a group of women all on their knees with hands held together as if in prayer. They knelt facing an altar which was decorated with flowers and burning candles. In the midst of these flowers was a framed photograph of Mfon looking as immaculate as never. I could see a fiery heart a few centimeters below her neck. She wore this inscrutable look on her face in a manner similar to that of the Mona Lisa. The praying women seemed to be muttering something indistinct. I could make out five words that were repeated over and over again. These words were, "Virgin Mfon pray for us".
And just like that, as if someone had snapped a finger; my eyes were opened and I awoke out of that trance. As I regained consciousness, I could hear Mfon speaking, "I don't know how to explain it but when I mean being a mother I mean...".
"Don't worry dear I understand perfectly" I said to her cutting her off.
"You do?" She asked as she looked at me incredulously.
I looked into her eyes in return and knew she suspected that I was being mischievous. My next line of response did confirm that suspicion. I knelt on the bed with hands clasped in mock reverence and prayed to her, "Have mercy on us Virgin Mfon... pray for us sinners". She immediately reached for a pillow closest to her and thus began our pillow fight.







THE END

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Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 8:34pm On Mar 28, 2019
EPISODE 2: BREAKFAST IN BED



So every woman in that household had her week. And during her week, she was basically responsible for my meals and erm... warming my bed. This was Uchechi's week and this was the fifth night of that week. The past few nights with her had been quite unusual. On the average I could manage 15 minutes of thrusting. Then there was the seven minutes cessation of hostilities followed by another 15 to 20 minutes of penetration and it was over. I was done.
However as said earlier, things had recently taken a step in a different direction. I had found myself for the fifth night in a row rocking my hips back and forth on Uchechi's bushy pelvis. And for the fifth night in a row, I had been rocking for at least 30 minutes without any break in transmission.

"How was this possible?" I thought.
"Me wey kpai kpai kpai and old Roger don fall. Na me wey come dey strike like say I be Ronaldo?" I thought again.

I kept on thoughting as I kept on rocking. I looked at her face which was illuminated by the moonlight coming in through the window. I noticed that her eyes were closed. Her hands remained firmly placed on my shoulders as she breathed heavily with each thrust I made. She was the silent type. Unlike those noisemakers with whom you couldn't tell for sure if they were truly enjoying it or were just being sarcastic. It didn't take long before her walls began closing down on me as she began making upward movements of her own with her hips.

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Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 8:37pm On Mar 28, 2019
The next morning I got up from bed. I left Uchechi sound asleep and made for the kitchen. This young woman had given me one of the nights of my life and some how, I decided it was only fair if I returned the favour by serving her breakfast in bed. The night had been cold but the radiant sun of the morning was quickly making its presence seen and felt. I was just in the process of cracking eggs over a frying pan when I heard footsteps. I turned to see Ogechi standing at the kitchen entrance and staring at me like I was some alien from another planet. She disappeared from the kitchen and moments later, Ogboji was the second woman to step in. She was equally surprised to find me at the fire whipping up breakfast. The way she stared at me, it was as if she was asking, "What do you think you are doing?"
Mfon was a bit tactful in her approach than the other two before her. She stepped into the kitchen and immediately headed for the kitchen cabinets. Apparently there was something in there she must have been looking for. "dey there dey deceive yourself" I smirked. Knowing fully well that her entering into the kitchen that morning was for no other reason than to see for herself if what she had heard from her mates was true.
Onyeka the least tactful of the lot soon made her presence known in that heavily accented voice of hers. "Ah an, baby when did you start frying egg?" she said with eyes and mouth wide open. Then she said as she walked out of the kitchen "I salute the native doctor that is responsible"

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Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 8:41pm On Mar 28, 2019
And that was how the women of the house took turns in coming into the kitchen. To see for themselves if what their mates were telling them was indeed true. Soon I was left alone to continue what I was doing in peace. I had gathered some egg shell fragments in my palms and headed for the pedal bin. I placed a foot firmly on the pedal and that lifted the lid. I looked into the bin as I disposed what was in my hands when something shiny in there caught my eye. I looked at the item closely and could make out the words "Alhaji Shehu's Naturals". There were two other words that I noticed on the label of that little brown bottle. The two words were "Kayan Mata". It was at that moment that the wheels in my head began turning and the events of the previous nights began to make a lot more sense. To say the least I was terrified. I felt like someone that had entered "one chance". For sure I knew what Kayan Mata is. I had read articles about it on the internet.

"Could this be the reason why...?" I thought. "Could Uchechi have...?" I also thought. "This women will not kill me" I prayed.









THE END

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Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 9:31am On Mar 29, 2019
hahaha nice story plot ... that part two remains me of the first day i took magani bura tashi.

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Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 6:19am On Mar 30, 2019
Cylovee:
hahaha nice story plot ... that part two remains me of the first day i took magani bura tashi.


You don't say... I never hear dah one before oh... kiss
Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 5:58pm On Mar 30, 2019
EPISODE 3: DINNER IN BETWEEN THE SHEETS




"So baby How was work?" she asked as she reached for my briefcase that evening. I wondered whether or not to confront her with what I had seen in the kitchen that morning. With what I had seen in the pedal bin that morning.
"Should I or should I not?" I thought. "Should I or should I play along?" I also thought.

"This woman had been slipping locally made aphrodisiacs into my meals for who knows how long?" I thought. "And here she is playing the part of a loving and caring wife" again I thought.

"Fine" was my terse response to her question and that with a frown.

I was trying to give her the cold shoulder. I was hoping this will discourage her.
I was hoping she will ask, "Ah an? Why are you frowning like that? Why are you answering me like that? Are you not happy to see your wife as I am happy to see my husband? Why are you behaving like that"

Then I would have answered back and our quarrel would have started like that. For I was a diplomat like that. For I knew women were like that. It was easy for them to pick offense just like that. It was easy to provoke them just like that. To pick a fight with them just like that.
But then, Uchechi was not like that. She had tricks up her sleeve that even I didn't know about. On hearing my response she studied my face intently. On doing so she incorrectly though impressively assumed my mood was because it had been a bad day at the office. So standing on her toes because she was shorter, she leaned in and gave me a wet kiss. "I have prepared something special for you this evening" she whispered. "Whatever happened at the office no matter, one bite will make it better" she said with a voice so husky. She took the briefcase from my hand. It was as if she had taken a gun from my hand. It was as if I had been disarmed.
"Come" she urged as she reached for my right with her own left hand and led me away from the sitting room to the master bedroom. She led the way and I followed. Like a lamb being led to slaughter I opened not my mouth. All I could think of at that point was having my member embraced in the warm folds of her thighs. That boneless part of my body was already throbbing. It was as if I could feel the blood pumping. And when I say "boneless" I am not referring to my heart. When I say pumping I am not referring to my heart. I am referring instead to that member. That member in my trousers. That member that was already increasing in size with every second that went past. That was making it uncomfortable to walk cause my underwear had been so tight.
Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 6:07pm On Mar 30, 2019
In the master bedroom I was seated on the bed. I was sort of perched at the edge of the bed. She stood in front of me and for the first time I noticed what she was wearing. I noticed what she was wearing was quite revealing. It was pink, it was satin and it was appealing. I realised that she had done all of these just for me. So instead of being angry I was grateful for being lucky.
"So what is it going to be?" she smiled suggestively. For she noticed how I had been staring at her body. She was happy that her efforts were succeeding.
"What do you mean?" I asked absentmindedly. As I looked away from her cleavage and looked at her face. She let out a chuckle that was laced with mischief. She let her hands fall to my shoulders and gave them a light squeeze. She straddled me there and then as I sat at the edge of that white and brown bedsheet.
She brought her face closer and explained herself, "I meant, what is it going to be? Are you going to eat before you eat or would it be after you eat?"
With her face a few inches away from mine, with her perfume already in my nostrils, with our eyes already so drunk with lust, we both knew the answer needed no verbal expression.
But trying to be witty I answered quite unnecessarily, "It depends on what you mean by 'eat after you eat' my dear".
"Are you that hungry" she teased.
"Yes ma'am give me something to eat" I said.
And she did as we had dinner in between the sheets.

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Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 6:12pm On Mar 30, 2019
I woke up few hours later feeling a bit dazed. I decided that I needed some moisture in my system. Uchechi had her head and her hand on my chest as we laid there. Her breathing was steady so I assumed she was fast asleep until I stirred.
"Where are you going?" she asked wearily.
"I will be back shortly don't worry" I replied instead.
I went for a cold glass of water from the refrigerator in the dinning. I quenched my thirst and placed the misty tumbler on the dinning table. An important football match was to be played that evening. So I went to have a sit on a sofa nearby. I turned on the flat screen TV in the sitting room and tuned in. I watched the players on the screen lineup in order to observe the prematch formalities. As I did so, I couldn't but let my thoughts wander. I thought of the match that had been played hours ago in the other room. A match with the youngest wife in the house and what a match that had been. So much sweat, so much passion, so much joy. It was a pity that two nights later, it would all be over as Dinma that Jezebel would take over.
It was halftime when I felt her presence. It was the scent of her perfume that announced her presence. She walked up to me and sat by my side.
"What are you watching?" Dinma asked me.
"Football" I responded not being in the mood for words.
"Who and who is playing?" she asked again.
"Chelsea and Arsenal" I managed to reply.
"Who is winning?" she kept on asking.
"Look at the scoreboard. Dem write am for there" I replied my tone heavy with disgust at what I felt were irritating questions.
"Aren't you supposed to be in bed with her keeping her company?" Dinma asked in an offhand manner.
On hearing that I turned to look at her. She had her gaze firmly fixed on the television screen. It was as if she hadn't said what she had just said.
"I thought I was your first choice" she said again when she saw that I had chosen to remain silent. I decided to ignore her and keep on watching what I was watching but she kept on talking.
"So another woman has finally stolen your heart from me" she said it as if it were an accusation.
That drew a chuckle from me. I felt the heat of her gaze as she looked away from the TV screen to look at me.
She said it as if she were hurt, like a cat that had fractured it's leg, like I had hurt her feelings. "Baby it's not funny"
I knew why she was in the seating room that night, why she was seated beside me but I was too tired and exhausted to give her the satisfaction. Her presence was making me uneasy so I decided to stand up from the sofa and head back to where I was coming from. As the commentator's voice coming from the auxiliary speakers became more and more distant with each step that took me further away from the sitting room and closer to my bedroom and Uchechi's warm embrace.









THE END

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Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 3:33pm On Mar 31, 2019
EPISODE 4: DINMA WANTS CHINESE




So my seven nights and days with Uchechi regrettably came at an end. The succeeding seven nights and days with Dinma as the woman of the house had begun six evenings ago. Her week had been uneventful. Nothing out of the ordinary had taken place. That was until that Sunday evening. Dinma and I were watching TV. Dinma was saying she wanted Chinese. I tried dissuading her. I suggested we watched a film instead. I told her about this film. I told her it was interesting with lots of sex scenes and nudity. Dinma wasn't convinced. She wanted an outing. She wanted me to take her out to eat Chinese.
"Baby let's have some Chinese" she said to me.
"No be only Chinese na Spanish" I replied jokingly.
"Baby why are you like this" she purred.
"If it is Uchechi you won't act like this" again she purred.
She brought herself closer. She pressed her boobs against my shoulders. I knew she was turning on her feminine wiles. She was trying to change my mind. I was having none of that.
"Don't bring Uchechi into this" I warned her.
"Why won't I?" she pressed on further.
"'Cos you no dey do am, the way wey Uchechi dey do" was my cryptic reply.

"And what is that suppose to mean?" she asked getting offended. And that was how fellow nairaland members, her anger tantrums began.

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Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 3:41pm On Mar 31, 2019
"What do you mean by that?" again she asked.
And with a loud cry she left the sitting room like that.
"This woman must be mad" I thought in my heart. I was glad nevertheless that she had left at last. My gladness was short-lived however for she re-entered minutes later. I saw an empty wine bottle in her hand. Dinma wasn't Warri she was Mbaise. So I had no reason to suspect she would do a thing like that. That was my folly, I grossly underestimated her temper. Next thing I knew, she launched the bottle at me. It must have been how King Saul launched his spear at David but David was lucky. Unfortunately for me, I was not so lucky.
I was lost for thoughts as I was lost for words. In a way it felt like I was in a trance. My brain hadn't the chance to process exactly what was happening. The whole scenario was unfolding like an action movie. The last words I recall saying was, "Lord help me"
Sparks began popping up here and there as the bottle made contact with my forehead. It was then I understood what people mean when they say, "If I slap you, you will see stars".
I saw white and yellow stars as I fell to the ground. As I lay there I kept seeing stars for a while followed by darkness. It was as if NEPA had taken light.
When next I opened my eyes, everywhere was so white I thought it was heaven. I could see figures moving and even they were clothed in white. I closed my eyes and didn't open them again for a while. When next I did my sight was more clearer than last.
I could see the ceiling it was painted in white. I tried moving my head and felt pains I had never felt in my life. At first I asked "Where am I?" but got no answers then. "What am I doing here?" again I asked and that was when memories came flooding back. I remained still cause the slightest movement would unleash hell. My head was burning so much it felt like hell. A nurse walked in with a silver tray in hand. And that was when I knew I must be in a hospital.

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Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 3:43pm On Mar 31, 2019
It took a while before I regained consciousness. When I awoke I heard what I knew to be Kenneth and Chimene's voice.
Kenneth was telling Chimene, "For two weeks now, na so him dey lie down like that. To move body him no fit. Dem dey give am food through drip"

"Jesus! But wetin happen?" Chimene asked, expressing shock at Kenneth's words.

"That him wife Dinma been wan chop Chinese food" Kenneth explained. "She been want make him take her out but him refuse" Kenneth also explained.
"Him tell am make dem sidon for house watch film but she too refuse. Next thing you know she stone am bottle" Kenneth further said.

"So all this na because of Chinese food?" I heard Chimene say.

"You don see am na. See the kind women our man carry pack keep for house" I heard Kenneth say.

"But why plenty women dey hungry this our guy?" I heard Chimene say.

"Leave am. To be King Solomon dey hungry am" Kenneth happened to say.
"The other day I been dey for yard when Uchechi him last wife been dey spread cloth" Kenneth began to say.
"As she dey spread na so she dey sing Yemi Alade song" he continued to say.
"If you like me you go pay me salary. Soup wey sweet na money dey cook am. If you want it you go spend to chop am" Kenneth was saying as he tried his best to mimic Uchechi's voice. His attempt was so hilarious, if not for my condition, I would probably have laughed my head off.

"So as she dey sing I been approach am" Kenneth was still talking to Chimene. "I come ask am, so without money there can't be love? Na so she answer me as she dey spread bedsheet, It is true that love is sweet oh, but with money love is sweeter" Kenneth concluded.

"So Uchechi could say a thing like that" I thought as I laid there like a vegetable. On and on my two friends kept on rambling. They were unaware of the fact that I was awake and listening.
"The things people who smile to your face say at your back" I thought. "Such a pity" again I thought.
I never imagined my relationship with Dinma will bring me to a hospital bed. Was this what they meant when they said, "for better for worse"... I wasn't sure.








THE END

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Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 9:17pm On Apr 01, 2019
EPISODE 5: LIFE WITHOUT DINMA




You get yourself in a mess. Then a question pops in your head. You begin to ask yourself, "How in hell did I get here?".
It had been weeks since the doctors discharged me. I still visited the hospital regularly. As an external patient, going for checkups every now and then.
I was still on medication; I was under medical observation; I was having hallucinations, this girl had messed with my head, both literally and figuratively.
God willing, I had made impressive recovery.
"It could have been worse" the doctors had told me. They said, "Consider yourself lucky". They said "Go to church and do thanksgiving".

After Dinma's bottle assault, she been don park comot. She was no longer with us. It was a trying period. Mfon being the most religious of the lot; was trying to bring me closer to God. On Sundays she brought her pastor. For in her church she was a deacon. But the Bible stands against adultery so go figure.
"You need Jesus" in the past she would tell me. "I laughed" cause I found it funny. She being a Christian and living in polygamy. The whole thing reeked of hypocrisy.
Dinma wasn't that bad if we should talk of her. I mean she could be a monster; mostly due to her temper. But there was those times, when she would be so sweet and kind. No she wasn't perfect, but that was what made her human, that was why we were humans. We all have our good and our bad sides.
Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 9:41pm On Apr 01, 2019
Besides, of all the women in the house, Dinma was the most sexually powerful. Uchechi was becoming good it is true, but Dinma was the real guru. By the way, Uchechi was using outside help. Uchechi was using "Kayan Mata" but Dinma's prowess came natural. In bed she was a real tigress. You needed to see her in action. I barely survived her aggression. She was tireless, she was merciless, my dear I suffer for dah girl. It was wickedness.
Those nights I pounded my mortar in her pestle. It was as someone pounding fufu. "Kpom!....kpom!...kpom!" it felt delightful. It was like the honeycomb. And I was eager to chop till my bele was full. She was warm, she was wet and very tight down there. She had told me once that she uses alum to wash down there. That night as we lay down there; side by side on that king-sized bed; we were both sweating, we were naked and both gasping for air.

"How about another round?" she had turned to me and asked seconds.
"Ah an Chidinma you no dey tire?" I wondered in my head. "My dear I'm sorry but I'm tired" I had wearily replied.
"Are you not supposed to be a man?" she had also asked.
"What do you mean by that?" I had equally asked. I was offended by that remark.

She gave no reply but rather, placed her hands on my thighs. She worked on my member till it was quite hard. She mounted me like I was an okada and gave me the ride of my life. There was nothing I could do, as with her waist she swallowed and released my member rapidly. She rode her okada roughly. The way she bounced, like Jade Mena she did it expertly. The way she bounced, it was with the speed of light. Moving her thighs front and then back. Moving her thighs up and down. "Kpa! Kpa! Kpa!" was the sound that was made whenever our thighs came in contact. It was like multiple gunshots, coming from the barrel of soldiers in Sambisa.
"At some point I was afraid she was going to break it. The way like a snake she was wiggling her body. So I looked at her begged, "Please baby, ride it softly"
As she rode, her ample oranges dangled in front of me. They were begging to be sucked and so I obliged. She bounced once more then leaned forward and gave me a kiss on my forehead.
Somehow I admired her cause she was bold in bed. She knew what she wanted and wasn't shy to take charge. She didn't care if you called her a slut cause she knew that a woman like her is what most men secretly want. What men in power pay for no matter the cost. And until she had "cummed" as many times as she wants, you weren't going anywhere tired or not. She kept on riding till I became so drowsy and sleep caught up with me. Even in my dreams it was so vivid, she was riding on me.
Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 9:49pm On Apr 01, 2019
What the Bible says in Esther chapter two verse one is telling. It speaks of how Ahasuerus remembered Vashti. That was after his wrath had been appeased. Vashti had fallen his hands in the very before of the whole empire. He had told her to come and dance but she had declined. However, despite everything he still missed her. She would never have been his number one if he didn't.
That was exactly how I felt at that point in time. Dinma had nearly messed up my head big time. Oh! I forgot to mention that like Petr Cech I was still wearing a helmet. Yes fellow nairalanders it was no small accident. But in spite of it all my soul still longed for her. As Justin Bieber sang, I was missing more than just her booodddyyy.
They say think with your head not with your heart. Others say follow your heart, they say listen to your heart. But if I am to be honest to myself, I wasn't thinking with my head or with my heart. I was thinking instead with the thing that was swinging in between my legs.
"This lady nearly ended me. What am I thinking? Na because of kongi I dey type all these long long things?"
But speaking of honesty I had to be equally honest with myself; this Jezebel was driving me crazy. How can I be longing for something that tried to that has the capacity to harm and ruin me? Which kind soul tie be this? Why do I keep thinking about this girl like this? Which kind madness be this. Ehn dear Lord abeg make you help me. I had my head in my hands. Na so I come begin dey weep like say I be woman. I felt a hand run down my spine. I heard Onyeka's Igbotic voice, she was asking, "Baby why are you crying?". The way she said it, it was as if she was mocking me.
"I am crying because my life is taking style to resemble Telemundo. My heart beats for Dinma and I dunno why" I wanted to but did not tell her.
"You are a man you are not supposed to cry" continued Onyeka.
On hearing that I did my best to stifle a laugh. She stood at my side and with her hand made circular movements on my back. She said, "Stop crying it will be alright"











THE END
Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 10:32am On Apr 06, 2019
one of the disadvantage of polygamy... but have not seen any verse in the bible that says marrying more than one wife is a sin.
Re: ★★★ by Nobody: 8:10pm On May 05, 2019
Cylovee:
one of the disadvantage of polygamy... but have not seen any verse in the bible that says marrying more than one wife is a sin.



Well... those who preach against polygamy usually use the following verses as reference. Note the phrases in bold.

Mark 10:10-12
10 When they were in the house again, the disciples asked Jesus about this.
11 He answered, “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. 12 And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.”

1 Timothy 3:2
Therefore an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach,

my apologies for the late reply

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