1. DON'T JUST TALK, LISTEN
Listening to your children gives them a sense of belonging and makes them feel special too and you may not agree with this but there is a lot to learn from your child! Somehow, your children can teach you how to love them and where exactly you need to pay attention if you can devote some time to listen to them. Parents often do a lot of talking than they do listening to their children. Your child might be trying to say something very important but may be struggling with words, you don't have to take words away from them, seal it off and get them busy so that they talk less. Even when he or she does something wrong, you've got to listen to them first, to know why they did what they did. It would be a pointer to something you never paid attention to.

2. THEY ARE KIDS BUT DON'T JUDGE THEM
We all used to be kids and we remember how bad and unimportant we felt when our parents judged us unfairly. When listening to your child, don't be quick to make any conclusive remark, think about whatever they have said and made them know you are thinking about it. Judging your kids may actually blind you on things you ought to pay attention to. For instance, you may have concluded that your children are disrespectful because they don't greet your cousin but you have to get close to them and know why they don't seem to be showing your cousin so much respect. When they get used to you judging them, you may have to get used to them hiding things from you.

3. DON'T SPOIL THE ROD ON THEM
The Bible didn't say we should spoil the rod on the child. In Psalm 23, we see that the rod can guide and comfort, therefore we may not need a physical rod but our words and loving disciplines. When a child does something wrong, don't let anger dictate how you punish him or her. Sometimes, people think they are disciplining their children but they are only satisfying their anger on those children. When you punish your kids in anger, you are abusing them and it will make them develop low self-esteem. It is important to discipline them and still make them understand you disciplined them because you love them. Loving parents feel bad when spanking their kids but they want their kids to do the right thing.

4. BE THERE
It is true that you have so many responsibilities and you work extra times to cover the cost for the bills but it is truer than your children need you more, at least now that they are still children. The Bible instructs that we train our children before they grow up because we may not be able to train them after they are grown. In Igbo communities, there is a popular quote that says "you don't learn dancing in your old age." It is good that you provide money, food, clothing and other material things to your kids but that is not enough. I usually tell people that if they can't devote time to their children, they shouldn't have kids in the first place. You have to be your child's gossip mate and best friend because what you do not teach them, they will learn it elsewhere and may even learn from the wrong person. Take note of your children's birthday and holidays!

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