There is a lot of emotion around the area of our lives that we call relationships, and the reason for all that emotion is because we tend to make relationships life and death.

We do that because whenever we enter into a relationship we come face-to-face with our deepest fears.

Our partners, intimate and familial, our dearest friends, our kids, our parents — those for whom we care most deeply — are the most vivid mirrors life has to offer. Relationships reflect back to us our conditioning, driving needs and our belief systems. That’s why the quality of your life really is the quality of your relationships.
So it’s no wonder relationships are so critical to us, and also the reason our relationships carry with them such strong charge. If there is one thing that Sage and I want to do, it’s to help neutralize the charge we bring to pure love.

The truth is, you can solve anything with the ones you love if you drop the charge of blame. Every relationship offers us the opportunity to learn something, including the things that make us angry, frustrated or afraid. Those upsets aren’t coming from our partners, they’re coming from our conditioning, past impressions and our models of the world. (Including the models we don’t even like.)

From those models of the world come all of the expectations we hold of ourselves and our partners. The upsets come from our own rules and expectations and the stories of blame we tell.