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My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls - Romance - Nairaland

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My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Loladearewa01: 9:53am On Dec 07, 2019
I am a staunch introvert, the kind that stays at home all day I really hate small talks and I can't talk to people for more than 5minutes.

When I call a lady hardly can we talk for a minute. Infact I hate calling. Now I had this experience when I visited my aunty and an ex of mine happen to stay in the same compound.

I noticed her boo calls her for like 2hours and she's always laughing with him. This was when I started realising my mistake when I was with her I hardly call and communicate and this has been happening with most of the ladies I meet and things are not working out.

Is there anyone with similar experience?

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Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Nobody: 10:05am On Dec 07, 2019
soon the AFC(average frustrated chumps of nairaland) will soon show up here with their stupidity telling you to go and hustle and stop thinking about women.

no woman is going to understand who you are because they gat no time and have their own problem

and you arent going to meet any girl that has the same interest like you do, most women will just pretend that they love what you love to make you happy

just because you are a stunt introvert does not stop you from having fun in life, you just have to come out from your shell and meet with people to improve your communication skills, understand small talk, build up your confidence by not giving a fucck, read a little bits of things and it not compulsory that you must talk with a woman on phone for 2 hours and stop comparing yourself with your ex present bf.

299 Likes 17 Shares

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by CreepyBlackpool: 10:13am On Dec 07, 2019
Why do you feel you have to be the one to do the calling and checking up and communicating. Why can't the girls put in effort into communicating too.

The only reason you feel you can't have conversations with girls is because you haven't met girls that you have similar interests with. When you eventually meet someone that shares your love and passion for certain things, you won't have shortage of things to discuss.

What you need is somebody that will understand who and what you are, simple

260 Likes 15 Shares

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Loladearewa01: 10:20am On Dec 07, 2019
lilwetdick:
soon the AFC(average frustrated chumps of nairaland) will soon show up here with their stupidity telling you to go and hustle and stop thinking about women.

nobody is going to understand who you are because people gat no time and have their own problem

and you arent going to meet any girl that has the same interest like you do, most women will just pretend that they love what you love to make you happy

just because you are a stunt introvert does not stop you from having fun in life, you just have to come out from your shell and meet with people to improve your communication skills, understand small talk, build up your confidence by not giving a fucck, read a little bits of things and it not compulsory that you must talk with a woman on phone for 2 hours and stop comparing yourself with your ex present gf.


Mmmm 1 bottle of beer for you. I have started forcing myself to go out

33 Likes 4 Shares

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Loladearewa01: 10:22am On Dec 07, 2019
CreepyBlackpool:
Why do you feel you have to be the one to do the calling and checking up and communicating. Why can't the girls put in effort into communicating too.

The only reason you feel you can't have conversations with girls is because you haven't met girls that you have similar interests with. When you eventually meet someone that shares your love and passion for certain things, you won't have shortage of things to discuss.

What you need is somebody that will understand who and what you are, simple
That's very true. Honestly I hate interacting with people but am getting really lonely

18 Likes

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Nobody: 10:26am On Dec 07, 2019
Loladearewa01:

Mmmm 1 bottle of beer for you. I have started forcing myself to go out

pls do, life is short, your youth is the time to enjoy, make mistakes and learn from mistakes, everything in this life is balance, believe me you wanna tell stories to your future children telling them how you ball and also enjoy life and work smart and hard

26 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Loladearewa01: 10:33am On Dec 07, 2019
lilwetdick:


pls do, life is short, your youth is the time to enjoy, make mistakes and learn from mistakes, everything in this life is balance, believe me you wanna tell stories to your future children telling them how you ball and also enjoy life and work smart and hard
Twale baba

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by madone: 10:52am On Dec 07, 2019
Loladearewa01:
I am a staunch introvert, the kind that stays at home all day I really hate small talks and I can't talk to people for more than 5minutes. When I call a lady hardly can we talk for a minute. Infact I hate calling. Now I had this experience when I visited my aunty and an ex of mine happen to stay in the same compound. I noticed her boo calls her for like 2hours and she's always laughing with him. This was when I started realising my mistake when I was with her I hardly call and communicate and this has been happening with most of the ladies I meet and things are not working out. Is there anyone with similar experience?
keep searching u fine ur kind of woman jare. Relationship talk does not have to be all that long. But it should be fun, insightful, futuristic,funny, just push a little bit of fun into ur talk ..ask questions,tease her,talk about the car that just passed ur area wen when u are oncall with her. Just play. Relax making a woman laugh is one of the he easiest thing to do o. Planet earth.have u notice thatsome people don't talk much but one word from them is bomb. You may be one of such...if I were u I will pick two option. Either becoming a better version of my introvert self or learn how to come out if it. The choice is very simple and which ever one u choose there are easy ways to come out of it. It's either u make a girl laugh or u learn how to laugh hen she talks in that way the road is smooth

32 Likes 4 Shares

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Loladearewa01: 10:53am On Dec 07, 2019
madone:
keep searching u fine ur kind of woman jare. Relationship talk does not have to be all that long. But it should be fun, insightful, futuristic,funny, just push a little bit of fun into ur talk ..ask questions,tease her,talk about the car that just passed ur area wen when u are oncall with her. Just play. Relax making a woman laugh is one of the he easiest thing to do o. Planet earth.have u notice thatsome people don't talk much but one word from them is bomb. You may be one of such...if I were u I will pick two option. Either becoming a better version of my introvert self or learn how to come out if it. The choice is very simple and which ever one u choose there are easy ways to come out of it. It's either u make a girl laugh or u learn how to laugh hen she talks in that way the road is smooth
Thanks alot man

1 Like

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Phelixblaq(m): 10:56am On Dec 07, 2019
Only jobless boys calls for 2 hours... The highest I can do is 10 minute of you are not okay with it then roast it

114 Likes 6 Shares

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by madone: 11:02am On Dec 07, 2019
Loladearewa01:

Thanks alot man
u welcome brother
Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Loladearewa01: 11:15am On Dec 07, 2019
Phelixblaq:
Only jobless boys calls for 2 hours... The highest I can do is 10 minute of you are not okay with it then roast it
Haha I was surprised.

1 Like

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Clinghton: 12:04pm On Dec 07, 2019
YouTube videos would help, making an extrovert as a friend would also help.

9 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Loladearewa01: 12:06pm On Dec 07, 2019
Clinghton:
YouTube videos would help, making an extrovert as a friend would also help.
I feel I should just accept myself for who I am

6 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by lefulefu(m): 1:39pm On Dec 07, 2019
u dont need to be a talkative or loudmouth to get a girl"s attention.its not every girl that likes a man who talks too much.just hang out with a girl who shares the same ideals with you.sometimes u can be with a girl and u two would be silent but then certain communications are still being shared cheesy.

55 Likes

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by SenecaTheYonger(m): 1:41pm On Dec 07, 2019
Hustle so you won't have to spend 2 hours talking on phone.

65 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Loladearewa01: 2:18pm On Dec 07, 2019
lefulefu:
u dont need to be a talkative or loudmouth to get a girl"s attention.its not every girl that likes a man who talks too much.just hang out with a girl who shares the same ideals with you.sometimes u can be with a girl and u two would be silent but then certain communications are still being shared cheesy.
Wow this makes alot of sense. I am a man of few words but lately I am beginning to be insecure about that

7 Likes

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Loladearewa01: 2:18pm On Dec 07, 2019
SenecaTheYonger:
Hustle so you won't have to spend 2 hours talking on phone.
As in I wonder what they keep saying Everytime

10 Likes

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by SenecaTheYonger(m): 2:36pm On Dec 07, 2019
Loladearewa01:

As in I wonder what they keep saying Everytime

Maybe they're gossip partners - I doubt it's anything thoughtful.

16 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Grayjoy: 2:39pm On Dec 07, 2019
While growing up, I hate it when someone is trying to make me talk, I hate it when people look at me, I came to realise later on that my self confidence was so low, but I never noticed it. Although am close to an introvert because my profession won't allow me to be a complete introvert, the possible solution is partially breaking out of my shell and improving the version that successfully got out of the shell, so you can be who you are, people should not twist and turn your personality solely because you want to please them, also improve your communication skills, communication is an essential ingredient in human co-existence, don't talk when you don't have anything sensible to say for the sake of talk, just learn to express yourself more frequently in a sensible and intresting way, my bro, enjoy your life while it lasts.

44 Likes

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Loladearewa01: 2:59pm On Dec 07, 2019
Grayjoy:
While growing up, I hate it when someone is trying to make me talk, I hate it when people look at me, I came to realise later on that my self confidence was so low, but I never noticed it. Although am close to an introvert because my profession won't allow me to be a complete introvert, the possible solution is partially breaking out of my shell and improving the version that successfully got out of the shell, so you can be who you are, people should not twist and turn your personality solely because you want to please them, also improve your communication skills, communition is an essential ingredient in human co-existence, don't talk when you don't have anything sensible to say for the sake of talk, just learn to express yourself more frequently in a sensible and intresting way, my bro, enjoy your life while it lasts.
Wow you made a strong point

6 Likes

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by paulsibility(m): 4:00pm On Dec 07, 2019
Loladearewa01:
I am a staunch introvert, the kind that stays at home all day I really hate small talks and I can't talk to people for more than 5minutes. When I call a lady hardly can we talk for a minute. Infact I hate calling. Now I had this experience when I visited my aunty and an ex of mine happen to stay in the same compound. I noticed her boo calls her for like 2hours and she's always laughing with him. This was when I started realising my mistake when I was with her I hardly call and communicate and this has been happening with most of the ladies I meet and things are not working out. Is there anyone with similar experience?
How do you communicate with your colleagues at work? How do communicate with the market women, the cab drivers you meet daily etc? How do you express your anger when you feel the bus conductor is trying to play sharp on you?
How do you react when your tailor spoils your 'Men in agbada' attire?
Try the same methods.
More importantly, get involved with ladies that have same interest as you (betting, politics, religion reading, gaming, cars, etc,)... It is that simple.

15 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Loladearewa01: 4:04pm On Dec 07, 2019
paulsibility:

How do you communicate with your colleagues at work? How do communicate with the market women, the cab drivers you meet daily etc? How do you express your anger when you feel the bus conductor is trying to play sharp on you?
How do you react when your tailor spoils your 'Men in agbada' attire?
Try the same methods.
More importantly, get involved with ladies that have same interest as you (betting, politics, religion reading, gaming, cars, etc,)... It is that simple.
I hardly talk to these people. I have quite a muscular body and a no nonsense face that makes people serious around me

9 Likes

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by wittyt98(m): 5:22pm On Dec 07, 2019
Loladearewa01:
the kind that stays at home all day I really hate small talks and I can't talk to people for more than 5minutes. When I call a lady hardly can we talk for a minute. Infact I hate calling.
this is so me grin mine is so worse that even when I'm at home, I don't like sitting where the rest of my family are gathered to avoid talking or conversing with anyone . I prefer to stay in my room all alone , listen to music and daydream grin even at work I don't talk much buh i smile at every given opportunity. I'm the type of person that'll give a 15-20 seconds reply to a particular topic other people are spending 2-5 minutes talking about. I've chased away a good number of potential friends cus I can't keep up with conversations or friendships. Feels like stress. it's why I avoid relationships too and just flirt cus I dont think I can keep up with the stress that comes along with dating. I see how my colleagues talk with their girlfriends on the phone for hours and I'm like naaaah this can never be me

48 Likes 3 Shares

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Loladearewa01: 5:44pm On Dec 07, 2019
wittyt98:
[b] This is so me grin mine is so worse that even when I'm at home, I don't like sitting where the rest of my family are gathered to avoid talking or conversing with anyone . I prefer to stay in my room all alone , listen to music and daydream grin even at work I don't talk much buh i smile at every given opportunity. I'm the type of person that'll give a 15-20 seconds reply to a particular topic other people are spending 2-5 minutes talking about.
Really. It's like you speaking through me. I always run away when I see people to avoid small talks. My room is locked 247 to worsen things am into freelance I.T so I work from home

11 Likes

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Lightangel65(m): 7:21pm On Dec 07, 2019
Loladearewa01:
I am a staunch introvert, the kind that stays at home all day I really hate small talks and I can't talk to people for more than 5minutes. When I call a lady hardly can we talk for a minute. Infact I hate calling. Now I had this experience when I visited my aunty and an ex of mine happen to stay in the same compound. I noticed her boo calls her for like 2hours and she's always laughing with him. This was when I started realising my mistake when I was with her I hardly call and communicate and this has been happening with most of the ladies I meet and things are not working out. Is there anyone with similar experience?

Stay in your comfort zone the other side is scary from what I have heard.

7 Likes

Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by Loladearewa01: 7:26pm On Dec 07, 2019
Lightangel65:


Stay in your comfort zone the other side is scary from what I have heard.
That's right
Re: My Poor Communication Ability Is Killing My Relationship With Girls by helinues: 9:12pm On Dec 07, 2019
Being an introvert does not mean you shouldn't be able to ginger your relationship with pet talks.. Ladies like to hear things they have never heard before ( real or fake)..

Jokes, meaningful conversations, future plans e.t.c

You really need to work on yourself

12 Likes

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