I'm not convinced. Only your mum has an answer to your question.

Braintrain:
Hey guys so basically I’m 24 yo in my finals studying a discipline in engineering in a federal university of technology
Right from when I was a child my father has always been irritated by me he has never seems to see any good in me I’m his first son and he doesn’t even act like it... I’ve seen my friends father-son relationship and I can’t but envy them my father hardly talked to me about life or About growing up he never cared to know what I do or cared to know who I hang out with I made a lot of mistakes growing up from 15-22 I got enveloped on drugs I had a tattoo on my forearm which till today he has no idea I’m not proud of it I had it when I was 16 I’m getting a laser removal soon I made a lot of mistakes growing up Mistakes that would have been avoided if I had some type of guidance he keeps up with the payment of my school fees and allowance and other financial benefits but it’s not all about that you know I’ve never been 24 before I don’t know what to expect but he has some sort of experience but he doesn’t share He was always quick to punish me as a kid and by punishment I mean flogging me with a hanger or with broom or with a tree branch he’ll flog me till I lose my voice from crying it was horrible growing up that the best moments of my growing up was when I went to the hostel away from home now he can’t obviously beat me so he switched to verbal assault he insults me at every opportunity he gets he curses me says I’ll never amount to anything he says things like I’m a bastard mind you he has been verbally assaulting me since I was little he calls me bastard as a normal insult I try to act though like it doesn’t get to me like his words don’t mean anything but deep down in my heart I’m broken I battled and conquered drug addiction on my own I was lost in secondary school sucked dick and was sucked but no penetration I’m not proud of this but I did it I’m mind you I’m not homosexual I was just bicurious and really Hot back then all this mistakes I made I’ve overcome and still trying to overcome them on my own I just feel it would have been easier if my dad had some sort of love for me
I see the way he is with my other siblings the way he smiles and plays with them he never did such with me he distanced himself from me on purpose as if he wants me to make mistake and end up a failure which I know I won’t
I did tramadol, ref and Lynn for close to 3 years I OD’ED a couple of times I had to fight my way out by myself I’m a good kid I found myself making friends with boys who had lost their dads and living life the way they want so I lived like them but I managed to realize myself by myself and cut ties with them

Is there anyone else’s who has the same relationship with their father or is just me

Is it possible that I’m not his son? Cause if I wasn’t he wouldn’t spend money on my education
Note that’s all he cares about my education he doesn’t care if I wear rags or if I don’t cut my hair or if I look like a hippie all he cares about is that I have the required textbooks or handouts or material for my course

Are you his first child? Maybe he's actually not your biological father and knows this.

SweetCunt97:
Are you his first child? Maybe he's actually not your biological father and knows this.

First son second child

Hi Braintrain,

I am sorry you had such a horrendous childhood and that your dad treats you so badly even till now.

You sound like you were a sensitive child while growing up and you suffered a lot of trauma from the beating and perhaps turned rebellious as a way to get attention and maybe get back at him subconsciously? The teenage /young adult brain is mysterious and prone to acting rashly.

Unfortunately, the only person that can answer the question you have asked is your dad. Have you ever sat down to ask him why? Try it and see what he says.

I see you are also questioning if you are his son? Who knows? If you are not his child, would it make you feel a bit better and give you closure? Some people are cruel to others for no reason.

It is remarkable that you have so much insight into your previous actions and have single handedly reformed yourself. You have done really well and you should be proud of what you have achieved.

Whether you are bi -curious, homo- curious, gay, whatever, it doesn’t matter. Doesn’t detract from how far you’ve come.

If there was therapy,I would encourage you to find it..sometimes,we may never have answers to the difficult situations in life,all we can do is work round it,refuse to be destroyed by it and draw strength from within.

I wish you all the best!

JONNYSPUTE:
He might not be your biological father.Your mum took the secret with her to the grave.Sorry bro.

This is not true.I'm a father too.My son is 22 nearing graduation in a university.We fathers could be harsh especially on our first sons.I remember having such hostile relationship with my son until lately and all this while I did love him and truly thanked God for bringing him into my world but this cat and mouse relationship existed. The issue here is all the undesirable attitudes of yours.They may not be big issues to you but it really hurts him so much he may never even wanna see you pass around him

iupac120:
op
sorry for the strain relationship with you dad.
I think your dad saw your earlier bad habits as a child and tried correcting with canes. Not that he does not care from the beginning, he did. For whom the Lord loves he chastens, and scourges every son whom he receives. But if you be without chastisement, of which all are partakers, then are you illegitimate children, and not sons. (Heb12:7, The same is applicable to our earthly fathers.
However, perhaps your dad was/is angry because your behavior was appalling to associate you as his son. The is the cause of verbal abuse since he can't hit you again with objects.
Please op see from this angle, you're precious to him and he does not want you to turn bad and you can see that he pays your fees but can't advice again, he believes that you have chosen your path to be wayward.
Finally, thank God you have turned a new leaf. You can still warm yourself to his heart by continuing in this your new path. He observes and loves you. He do care!

As a father of a grown kid in his twenties, I wish the OP take this advice very very very serious

Braintrain:
Hey guys so basically I’m 24 yo in my finals studying a discipline in engineering in a federal university of technology
Right from when I was a child my father has always been irritated by me he has never seems to see any good in me I’m his first son and he doesn’t even act like it... I’ve seen my friends father-son relationship and I can’t but envy them my father hardly talked to me about life or About growing up he never cared to know what I do or cared to know who I hang out with I made a lot of mistakes growing up from 15-22 I got enveloped on drugs I had a tattoo on my forearm which till today he has no idea I’m not proud of it I had it when I was 16 I’m getting a laser removal soon I made a lot of mistakes growing up Mistakes that would have been avoided if I had some type of guidance he keeps up with the payment of my school fees and allowance and other financial benefits but it’s not all about that you know I’ve never been 24 before I don’t know what to expect but he has some sort of experience but he doesn’t share He was always quick to punish me as a kid and by punishment I mean flogging me with a hanger or with broom or with a tree branch he’ll flog me till I lose my voice from crying it was horrible growing up that the best moments of my growing up was when I went to the hostel away from home now he can’t obviously beat me so he switched to verbal assault he insults me at every opportunity he gets he curses me says I’ll never amount to anything he says things like I’m a bastard mind you he has been verbally assaulting me since I was little he calls me bastard as a normal insult I try to act though like it doesn’t get to me like his words don’t mean anything but deep down in my heart I’m broken I battled and conquered drug addiction on my own I was lost in secondary school sucked dick and was sucked but no penetration I’m not proud of this but I did it I’m mind you I’m not homosexual I was just bicurious and really Hot back then all this mistakes I made I’ve overcome and still trying to overcome them on my own I just feel it would have been easier if my dad had some sort of love for me
I see the way he is with my other siblings the way he smiles and plays with them he never did such with me he distanced himself from me on purpose as if he wants me to make mistake and end up a failure which I know I won’t
I did tramadol, ref and Lynn for close to 3 years I OD’ED a couple of times I had to fight my way out by myself I’m a good kid I found myself making friends with boys who had lost their dads and living life the way they want so I lived like them but I managed to realize myself by myself and cut ties with them

Is there anyone else’s who has the same relationship with their father or is just me

Is it possible that I’m not his son? Cause if I wasn’t he wouldn’t spend money on my education
Note that’s all he cares about my education he doesn’t care if I wear rags or if I don’t cut my hair or if I look like a hippie all he cares about is that I have the required textbooks or handouts or material for my course

If you can listen to this and practice it for at least 3 days, you'll come and testify to the glory of God.

Your father doesn't like you, is because of you.

Yes, change the concept of yourself, believe that you're loved, happy and your father sees everything good in you.

If you're sincere in this and don't doubt, reasons may come and falter the mission, but pay no attention. Place your attention on your goal. Then you'll see changes from your dad. Just be truthful and do it.

Glad to know you are trying to create a better future for yourself with your education. My advice is that you choose to be happy and that way, his actions wouldn't affect you too much. You owe yourself your greatness and I agree you need some sense of direction. For this, find one or two mentors in what you are interested through LinkedIn. Be open to them and let them guide you.

I wish you the very best in your pursuit.

LOVE NEVER FAILS DESPITE …… A LOVELESS UPBRINGING

[b]Have you have ever been mistreated? Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you have to endure a severe trial? Well, most of you dear brothers and sisters have, you have gone through difficult trials. Some of you have endured worse things, things that are horrendous even from the world stand point. Things that could have eroded your love, not only for other people, but even for Jehovah.

This is the situation for a number of people today. The book family violence makes this comment… “Evidence suggests that people are more likely to be killed, physically assaulted, or emotionally or sexually abused by other family members more than by anyone else. It even goes on to say “The place where people should be loved and feel safe is, for some adults and children, the most dangerous place of all.” Some of our friends here have experienced that unfortunately, at the same time as Christians, we cannot allow such experiences to erode our love. We must continue to show love, display it and even have love for Jehovah.

This article will help u to continue showing unwavering love despite difficult circumstances (1Co 13:. One of those circumstances is in upbringing where there is no love in the family, where there is no love in the house, some have endured these things. We want everyone who has endured these things to know that Jehovah loves you, we love you and Satan cannot break our love. When we look at circumstances that some have gone through, we know that Jehovah loves us because he has given us his word the bible. And in his word we gain comfort from Jehovah and his son and we find individuals who have gone through something similar. One example is king Hezekiah.

We know he is a faithful and strong king, yet at the same time let’s consider what he went through even as a youth. What did Hezekiah go through as a child? What did he have to endure that was similar to some of the things we mentioned earlier?

Think of Hezekiah’s father, his father was Ahaz, a wicked king who did not love Jehovah. Instead he loved false god’s, so much to the extent that he sacrificed his own sons - Hezekiah’s siblings to these gods, having them burnt alive. If you were Hezekiah growing up in that family where your father, your closet family member hated Jehovah, having your own brothers put to death, perhaps at some point, you may have wondered if you would be next. It could have caused Hezekiah to lose his love for Jehovah and for others. Yet Jehovah’s love was very evident to him. He was surrounded by individuals who helped him to develop and learn to love Jehovah. If you look in your bible in the Appendix A6, the second charts of kings and prophet, one of the things it points out is that the prophets who served in the time of Ahaz were Isaiah, Hosea and Micah. These were faithful prophets, ones who no doubt helped Hezekiah strengthened his love for Jehovah despite what was going on around him. Despite the fear he has about his father, Hezekiah was able to develop love and Jehovah strengthened him too.

If you were not surrounded by good examples of love as a youth, how might you imitate Hezekiah? Believe that Jehovah’s love for you is real; learn to love by imitating Him. Jehovah’s love exceeds that of any human. We find this assurance in Psalms 27:10. ‘Even if my own father and mother abandon me, Jehovah himself will take me in’

How comforting to know that Jehovah’s love exceeds that of any human parent! As painful as rejection, mistreatment, or abandonment by a parent may be, it has no bearing on how much Jehovah cares for you. (Romans 8:38, 39) Remember that God draws those whom he loves. (John 3:16; 6:44) Regardless of how you have been treated by humans, you are loved by your heavenly Father! And it helps not only us but also others who may go through the same thing. In the case of Hezekiah, He found this inspired words to be true. He was aware that Jehovah had taken him in and it was reassuring for him. That is why he learned to trust in Jehovah and that trust helped him to become a very faithful king.

That means that despite whatever we may go through in life, we can cultivate love for Jehovah and for our brothers, we can allow Jehovah to mold us and not allow Satan to break us with what we may go through. We know that Satan’s world tries to break us, but we will not allow that to happen. Like Hezekiah, trust in your heavenly Father unreservedly, and do as he instructs. Accept the love of other faithful servants of Jehovah; benefit from their example.

The world likes to think that ones who have gone through things like we have described are broken. But really once we have been drawn by Jehovah into his love we are not broken, we are loved, loved by Jehovah and loved by his people.

For us who may not have experienced such upbringing, we have to remember that others have, and we have to be patient with ones who may not have trust in us right away, and as we befriend them and show them our love , no doubt they will open up and show love as well.

Jehovah has certainly provided us wonderful examples both ancient and modern of ones who have grown in their love. As we keep this in mind, let us remember that we cannot change our past, nor do we allow our past to define us, to determine who we are. And we are not doomed to failure because of our upbringing. Remember Hezekiah became one of the most faithful kings in Judah, According to 2Ki 18: 5, there was no one like him among all the kings of Judah after him nor among those prior to him. He trusted in the God of Israel setting an example for us today to do the same.
While family love may fail, we remember that Jehovah’s love will never ever fail us. That is Jehovah’s assurance, we find this at (Read Isa 49:15) describing the depth of Jehovah’s compassion for his people, Isa 49:15 paints a picture of a love that will never ever fail. ‘Can a woman forget her nursing child Or have no compassion for the son of her womb? Even if these women forget, I would never forget you’

The tender compassion that Jehovah has for his servants is unfailing. It is immeasurably stronger than the most tender natural feeling that we can imagine—the compassion that a mother normally feels for her infant child.

And as you read the description of love in this bible verse, did your heart yearn to have someone show you that type of love? Jehovah will never forget to show love and compassion for you. It is only natural that you should feel such a longing. After all, The God of love designed us to love and to be loved, we are created in his image and that is the most important quality that we are created with. So imitate Jehovah’s love, love your brothers and you too can overcome a loveless upbringing.

If you want to reach out and seek someone to talk to, check out contact, email or Whatsapp![/b]

NockMedia:

Dude, you're technically a Repentant homosexual. I'm not trying to judge you though.







LOL rooster and bull story

Don't be like that.
Show compassion to someone who needs it.

Takotsubo:
Hi Braintrain,

I am sorry you had such a horrendous childhood and that your dad treats you so badly even till now.

You sound like you were a sensitive child while growing up and you suffered a lot of trauma from the beating and perhaps turned rebellious as a way to get attention and maybe get back at him subconsciously? The teenage /young adult brain is mysterious and prone to acting rashly.

Unfortunately, the only person that can answer the question you have asked is your dad. Have you ever sat down to ask him why? Try it and see what he says.

I see you are also questioning if you are his son? Who knows? If you are not his child, would it make you feel a bit better and give you closure? Some people are cruel to others for no reason.

It is remarkable that you have so much insight into your previous actions and have single handedly reformed yourself. You have done really well and you should be proud of what you have achieved.

Whether you are bi -curious, homo- curious, gay, whatever, it doesn’t matter. Doesn’t detract from how far you’ve come.

If there was therapy,I would encourage you to find it..sometimes,we may never have answers to the difficult situations in life,all we can do is work round it,refuse to be destroyed by it and draw strength from within.

I wish you all the best!

I love your contribution..

Braintrain:
Hey guys so basically I’m 24 yo in my finals studying a discipline in engineering in a federal university of technology
Right from when I was a child my father has always been irritated by me he has never seems to see any good in me I’m his first son and he doesn’t even act like it... I’ve seen my friends father-son relationship and I can’t but envy them my father hardly talked to me about life or About growing up he never cared to know what I do or cared to know who I hang out with I made a lot of mistakes growing up from 15-22 I got enveloped on drugs I had a tattoo on my forearm which till today he has no idea I’m not proud of it I had it when I was 16 I’m getting a laser removal soon I made a lot of mistakes growing up Mistakes that would have been avoided if I had some type of guidance he keeps up with the payment of my school fees and allowance and other financial benefits but it’s not all about that you know I’ve never been 24 before I don’t know what to expect but he has some sort of experience but he doesn’t share He was always quick to punish me as a kid and by punishment I mean flogging me with a hanger or with broom or with a tree branch he’ll flog me till I lose my voice from crying it was horrible growing up that the best moments of my growing up was when I went to the hostel away from home now he can’t obviously beat me so he switched to verbal assault he insults me at every opportunity he gets he curses me says I’ll never amount to anything he says things like I’m a bastard mind you he has been verbally assaulting me since I was little he calls me bastard as a normal insult I try to act though like it doesn’t get to me like his words don’t mean anything but deep down in my heart I’m broken I battled and conquered drug addiction on my own I was lost in secondary school sucked dick and was sucked but no penetration I’m not proud of this but I did it I’m mind you I’m not homosexual I was just bicurious and really Hot back then all this mistakes I made I’ve overcome and still trying to overcome them on my own I just feel it would have been easier if my dad had some sort of love for me
I see the way he is with my other siblings the way he smiles and plays with them he never did such with me he distanced himself from me on purpose as if he wants me to make mistake and end up a failure which I know I won’t
I did tramadol, ref and Lynn for close to 3 years I OD’ED a couple of times I had to fight my way out by myself I’m a good kid I found myself making friends with boys who had lost their dads and living life the way they want so I lived like them but I managed to realize myself by myself and cut ties with them

Is there anyone else’s who has the same relationship with their father or is just me

Is it possible that I’m not his son? Cause if I wasn’t he wouldn’t spend money on my education
Note that’s all he cares about my education he doesn’t care if I wear rags or if I don’t cut my hair or if I look like a hippie all he cares about is that I have the required textbooks or handouts or material for my course

OP. I congratulate you for coming through such horrible treatment right from childhood... I think I understand how it feels not having a real connection with ones parent... Especially when you have friends whose parents seem to be so close to their kids and can share anything with them...

I had the same relationship with my mom and I just couldn't tell her anything, even if I was dying.. She loved education too and will psy fees etc, some books but Uni, she couldn't be bothered with textbooks and handouts... It seems to take her vengeance of dad's toxic relationship with her out on me..

She ever critized me and verbal insults and public disgrace are her trademark... Making fun and having no secrets... She thrives in my embarrassing... I also saw even till now how she was with my kid brother and sister... I think Nigerian parents tend to be quite hard and harsh on the eldest while youngest gets typically spoilt with everything...

Such parents tend turn their kids into introverts who are withdrawn and can't share with anyone what they're going through.

Forgive him, dont hate him. Im sure he does not know what he's doing... Don't take it personal anymore... Shake it off and make sure you're not like your dad with any of your kids when you have kids.... At least you too know how it feels..

Really painful and traumatic what you've been through.

There is a reason for the hate by your dad. It may be conscious or unconscious.

Conscious: it might be something leading to or concerning your birth and history. Perhaps you are a reminder of a painful past to him.

Unconscious: Perhaps you unconsciously remind him of his own failures, i.e., he sees his weaknesses and failures in you. You may also unconsciously remind him of his own dad or mum, who may have hated him or treated him badly. In both cases, he may not even know why he hates you but just finds himself reacting that way to you.

Whichever be the case, forgive him because he is ignorant. If he knew better he would have loved you unconditionally. He can't give what he doesn't have.

Thank God you are a conscious and self aware person. My advice will be for you to go for therapy to assist you in the healing process. You will need it. Else you will always live in his shadows, a bye product of pain.

Forgive him, heal and then find your true self apart from your pain and circumstances.

Afterwards, let your light so shine.

PS: Consider having a close relationship with God as a substitute for the father-son connection you never had. It's a tough world out there. You wil need it.

Braintrain:
Hey guys so basically I’m 24 yo in my finals studying a discipline in engineering in a federal university of technology
Right from when I was a child my father has always been irritated by me he has never seems to see any good in me I’m his first son and he doesn’t even act like it... I’ve seen my friends father-son relationship and I can’t but envy them my father hardly talked to me about life or About growing up he never cared to know what I do or cared to know who I hang out with I made a lot of mistakes growing up from 15-22 I got enveloped on drugs I had a tattoo on my forearm which till today he has no idea I’m not proud of it I had it when I was 16 I’m getting a laser removal soon I made a lot of mistakes growing up Mistakes that would have been avoided if I had some type of guidance he keeps up with the payment of my school fees and allowance and other financial benefits but it’s not all about that you know I’ve never been 24 before I don’t know what to expect but he has some sort of experience but he doesn’t share He was always quick to punish me as a kid and by punishment I mean flogging me with a hanger or with broom or with a tree branch he’ll flog me till I lose my voice from crying it was horrible growing up that the best moments of my growing up was when I went to the hostel away from home now he can’t obviously beat me so he switched to verbal assault he insults me at every opportunity he gets he curses me says I’ll never amount to anything he says things like I’m a bastard mind you he has been verbally assaulting me since I was little he calls me bastard as a normal insult I try to act though like it doesn’t get to me like his words don’t mean anything but deep down in my heart I’m broken I battled and conquered drug addiction on my own I was lost in secondary school sucked dick and was sucked but no penetration I’m not proud of this but I did it I’m mind you I’m not homosexual I was just bicurious and really Hot back then all this mistakes I made I’ve overcome and still trying to overcome them on my own I just feel it would have been easier if my dad had some sort of love for me
I see the way he is with my other siblings the way he smiles and plays with them he never did such with me he distanced himself from me on purpose as if he wants me to make mistake and end up a failure which I know I won’t
I did tramadol, ref and Lynn for close to 3 years I OD’ED a couple of times I had to fight my way out by myself I’m a good kid I found myself making friends with boys who had lost their dads and living life the way they want so I lived like them but I managed to realize myself by myself and cut ties with them

Is there anyone else’s who has the same relationship with their father or is just me

Is it possible that I’m not his son? Cause if I wasn’t he wouldn’t spend money on my education
Note that’s all he cares about my education he doesn’t care if I wear rags or if I don’t cut my hair or if I look like a hippie all he cares about is that I have the required textbooks or handouts or material for my course

You are going through a challenge thst will build you a better man, but the way you are going to handle it, is what will be the outcome at the end of your life

Now that your dad is throwing stones on you, gather the stones and use it to build your house

We have orphans and fatherless guys, yet they came out successfully

I don't want you to live a life of pity

Be strong and understand that you are standing alone and if you stand well, you will be a pillar to others

dalass:


OP. I congratulate you for coming through such horrible treatment right from childhood... I think I understand how it feels not having a real connection with ones parent... Especially when you have friends whose parents seem to be so close to their kids and can share anything with them...

I had the same relationship with my mom and I just couldn't tell her anything, even if I was dying.. She loved education too and will psy fees etc, some books but Uni, she couldn't be bothered with textbooks and handouts... It seems to take her vengeance of dad's toxic relationship with her out on me..

She ever critized me and verbal insults and public disgrace are her trademark... Making fun and having no secrets... She thrives in my embarrassing... I also saw even till now how she was with my kid brother and sister... I think Nigerian parents tend to be quite hard and harsh on the eldest while youngest gets typically spoilt with everything...

Such parents tend turn their kids into introverts who are withdrawn and can't share with anyone what they're going through.

Forgive him, dont hate him. Im sure he does not know what he's doing... Don't take it personal anymore... Shake it off and make sure you're not like your dad with any of your kids when you have kids.... At least you too know how it feels..

God bless your soul

frozen70:


You are going through a challenge thst will build you a better man, but the way you are going to handle it, is what will be the outcome at the end of your life

Now that your dad is throwing stones on you, gather the stones and use it to build your house

We have orphans and fatherless guys, yet they came out successfully

I don't want you to live a life of pity

Be strong and understand that you are standing alone and if you stand well, you will be a pillar to others

It honestly isn’t as Easy as said i am trying trust me mentally I’m lagging behind seriously I’ve never had that motivation to face life I’m introverted I don’t know how to connect with other people it’s hard for me

Braintrain:

It honestly isn’t as Easy as said i am trying trust me mentally I’m lagging behind seriously I’ve never had that motivation to face life I’m introverted I don’t know how to connect with other people it’s hard for me

My dear brother

You must seat up, no matter how badly hurt you are

You can't remain an introvert, you need to be mixing up with people and free up yourself from anything that will give low self esteem and such will lead you to complex problems

Anyway, go closer to God and you will regain your stability

sisisioge:
Hmmmm...

You sounded like a very difficult kid too. Its not everyone whose father neglects that turn to drugs at 16, get tattoo or commit all the monstrosity you failed to mention. Who wouldn't further distance themselves from such people when there are other well grounded children to care for? Besides, if he didn't care, did you mom not care too? There are several kids raised by one of their parents but still turn out just fine! You father at least continued to be responsible for your education, housing, feeding...some people aren't that lucky.

Biko check yourself, work on yourself, better yourself and all will be attracted to you. Even you wouldn't want to be saddled with a difficult kid that is making a mockery of his education. Chai...you wrote this long epistle without a single punctuation!

By the way, yes he wasnt much of a good father to you as I strongly wish he had been more there for you, but I also wonder what your part was in pushing him away. It's too late for anyone to start raising you now so you need to raise yourself and see if you could still remedy the lost bond between you two if you so care.

No vex.

A father no Matter what, stands by his child. Words of wisdom goes a long way in correcting a "stubborn child".

It doesn't matter the child's misdeeds.

I like the fact that you you didn't hide your mistakes, you were able to identify them, it's the first step.
Can you try establishing a relationship with God? That inner joy and unconditional love you are looking for will be found.
Your relationship with your siblings is also very important, get close to them,let them even see your new you before your dad does.
For 18, years, you didn't communicate with your mum's family, also try to mend that bridge,in Igbo land, it's ok for a child to seek comfort in his maternal home, you won't be pushed out, you will also have relatives that they help you reach to your dad,if they see your new you too, they'll preach the gospel on your behalf.
I pray that things fall in pleasant places for you!!!