I certainly don't feel like falling in love again.
I am tired.
I'm emotionally tired.
Physically weak.
I feel betrayed by my emotions.

I try so hard to be good.
Thinking there was bad in me in the first place.
I want to cry but I can't make up tears.
I'm frustrated by the above.

I am at that place where one forgo logic and realistic data
At the place where I feel like crying out like a baby.
At that place where one screams "all girls are scum".

If only that were true.
If only I can say that for sure
It's the reason I am in this loop in the first place
The 3rd scum in a roll.

Statistically, it would make sense.
I know. I'm heartbroken.
I'm sad.

Oily marks appear in my memory files.
They tell a story that makes me sad
The marks were left by a deleted "I love you."

Scarred by "forever and always".
Punched by "you're my joy".
Slapped and mocked by "you're my heart".

I can feel my heart ache literally.
I can feel my veins warm up.
I wish love was something you could buy.
I wish for so many things.

What you say?
That it was all for the best?
Ransom notes keep falling out your mouth.
Midsweet talk on your lips.
They feel like poison.

They are the most terrible lies I've ever heard.
I never hurt you.
You didn't need to hurt me.
But it doesn't matter to you.
Because to you, I'm just another guy.

May God bless you.