This is deep.OP university education no be beans oo.I hope you won't stop in the middle of the race.

thesicilian:

1. Why does she have to be living with you before you help her?
2. If you know you're not financially stable enough to sponsor her education please don't start what you can't finish otherwise this will create serious problems for both of you later on.

Jilu kwa nwayo oo.
Dear poster, I am also that kind of sappy human who would be torn apart by the idea of helping one twin and leaving the other.
But it’s all finally down to what you feel is right.

bryanarchie:


How
Hmmmmmm...i really appreciate your opinion, I guess people will misunderstand me.
I'll just increase her salary a bit and let her sort out her life, no need to complicate mine.
Thank you for your opinion. I truly appreciate..

This might be a better option, especially if she is an adult. I was liking your idea but then I started reading the whole “helping your business” bit and I became confused. Then you acknowledged that people will misunderstand you. I don’t know why peoples’ misunderstanding would affect well-meaning and true intentions?
And so I modified.

StubbornGENIUS:
This is deep.OP university education no be beans oo.I hope you won't stop in the middle of the race.

Do not discourage those willing to help others stand. You are not the one that came up with the issue. The poor girl found herself in that position 'cus of her situation. If God ministers to the heart op to help the poor girl, same God will provide the resouces to op to see the girl achieve her dream. Op comfirmed that the gir has been helpful to her home and where she works for her in her shop as a sales girl. She saved to take jamb and the woman found her worthy to assist her achieve her dream. Let op see her as her daughter and shall recieve favor God. It's left for the girl and her God if later forget those who helped her to the top.

Do not pray you see yourself in a position you need assistance.

Great Ambassador John Fashonu was abandoned by his father and was adopted by a forster parents. He became great and took care of his forster parents.

..hmmm...I normally don't comment on threads like this...but I'll make an exception today.
..I commend ur intentions to help the young lady in question. it's only God that rewards such an effort..
my honest advice..
Firstly..assist if and only if u are ready to go the distance..(I'm talking from experience)
Secondly..dnt make the mistake of taking her in. Let her stay with her pple. ur business with her should only be academic and upkeep. Nothing more.
Thirdly,..be prepared for the unknown. Cos this ur "good intention" today maybe seen as something else tomorrow.
We are humans...

StubbornGENIUS:
This is deep.OP university education no be beans oo.I hope you won't stop in the middle of the race.

.. Absolutely reality OP.. University education is not like paying monthly salary oh. I know how much strain it was on my mum to train I and my 2 brothers in the uni at the same time. So u better be ready.

Another advice.
...Since she's still a teenager. Sit her down and talk to her. Let her learn a skill or trade for two years.
She can apply for part time studies during or after the apprenticeship..or full time studies after it.
..That way she already has a potential means of supporting herself financially.
..u can support her with allowances during the apprenticeship period.

I have decided to clearly spell out my terms and condition to her and her family.
I'm not rich but as long as I'm alive it will be possible.
I will never abandon her except she goes contrary to our agreement.
If she gets pregnant, I'll stop funding and count my loss.
I'm not expecting anything from her but a First Class degree won't be bad.
Thank you nairaland.

halogate:

.. Absolutely reality OP.. University education is not like paying monthly salary oh. I know how much strain it was on my mum to train I and my 2 brothers in the uni at the same time. So u better be ready.

Another advice.
...Since she's still a teenager. Sit her down and talk to her. Let her learn a skill or trade for two years.
She can apply for part time studies during or after the apprenticeship..or full time studies after it.
..That way she already has a potential means of supporting herself financially.
..u can support her with allowances during the apprenticeship period.

Hmmmmmmmm....

bryanarchie:


How
Hmmmmmm...i really appreciate your opinion, I guess people will misunderstand me.
I'll just increase her salary a bit and let her sort out her life, no need to complicate mine.

Thank you for your opinion. I truly appreciate..

I see no reason why you can’t help her to help you as far as she will not be rendering sexual help.

bryanarchie:
Why is everyone referring to me as a man, I'm ar lsdy

How many men do you know named Bryan or Archie?

andyanders:
Madam, take her as your daughter and do help her to find her feet. Remember that u stated that she has been good to u, both at work nd home. Do that 'cus of God. By doing this, God will prosper you. Do not attach/expect any form of reward towards whatever u are doing from her, but from God who gave u life and the girl will reward u in kind. For her to be sending whatever u pay her to her people shows that the girl has the heart of gold and will not forget where she is coming from. Nobody knows tomorrow. She might even turn to be a blessing to ur children. May God who sees ur heart bless nd reward u IJN, Ameen.

Maybe the problem people have with the OP is the use of the word help, which they assume must be rendered without expectation.

But I am of the opinion that help can be reciprocal as far as the reciprocity is balanced. In my opinion, I think the OP’s terms are fair... I think

bryanarchie:


Yes you are right.

She said the elder sister said they should forget about school for now and the elder sister has abandoned the akara business, my girl fries Akara and sells before coming to work.
She is too attached to her twin, they do everything together. I wish I can help both but I can't.
My observation, the elder sister believes she raised her up and believes she should serve her, but I don't believe someone this good deserves more.

She saved and wrote jamb this year but now she has been discouraged and something in me is telling me I should help her.

I'm scared of finances anyway... But I believe I can do it.

Attachment to a twin is silly talk. Any individual who has written SSCE is ready for higher institution.

I still maintain that this young woman will benefit from this arrangement immensely, even more than you. I’m in support of your plan

thesicilian:

1. Why does she have to be living with you before you help her?
2. If you know you're not financially stable enough to sponsor her education please don't start what you can't finish otherwise this will create serious problems for both of you later on.

it usually end in tears first marry her to avoid the word she used you woman can pretend to be good until the get what the want then she will unleash the demons in her be smart oh bros

bryanarchie:
I have decided to clearly spell out my terms and condition to her and her family.
I'm not rich but as long as I'm alive it will be possible.
I will never abandon her except she goes contrary to our agreement.
If she gets pregnant, I'll stop funding and count my loss.
I'm not expecting anything from her but a First Class degree won't be bad.
Thank you nairaland.

If this is how u really want it without any ulterior motive then u are one of the best. The Bible says that anyone who help the poor is lending to God.

Modified.

Madam, if you truly want to help or have intention of helping her. Let her enrol in a beauty salon or any other skill she can acquire for the period of 6months, if she know what she's doing. She should have gather something that will keep her going in school.

Meanwhile, she's still with you and then collect salary for those period. Don't complicate yourself by trying to separate her from anyone.

Don't increase her salary out rightly,but open an account for her to save. She can do whatever she like with her money.

You don't need to go beyond the girl you know. More over, it's better you create a path to success for her than to have full possession of her.

bryanarchie:
Good morning, I have a sales girl that has been extremely good to me and my family. October this year will make it one year of her working with me.
She's done with her ssce and I must confess she has done excellently. She is infact an angel in human form.
This your teenage girl brought peace to my business and assists me at home effortlessly, yes she is worth every praise.

She lives with her Elder sister that is married with four children. My girl has a twin sister that lives with them too. Her Elder sister fries Amara for a living and her husband is currently jobless. Her twin sister is also works as a sales girl.

She has lived with her Elder sister for most of her life and I must confess she trained her well.
I once proposed that she likes with me but I never got a response and I never asked further.
Now, I had a discussion with her yesterday and I was really shocked that she does not have savings, she has been using her Little salary to support her sister and husband.
She wrote jamb this year and was awaiting dmission but she is already giving up hope on her education due to finances.
I want to sponsor her education but I can only do that if I take her in as my ward.
Am I doing so much too soon?
I'm not rich but I believe I want to do this.
Do you think her sister will be happy?
I can only help her, so I really feel bad breaking up the twin bond.

Please I need serious advice on this issue.
Her parents are alive in the village in benue state.
Thank you

Provided u don't start disturbing her for toto weda now or in d future.....

Ur doing well

Please do the best you can to help her. Whosoever helps the poor, lends to the Lord, and He will repay. God bless you.

bryanarchie:


Yes you are right.

She said the elder sister said they should forget about school for now and the elder sister has abandoned the akara business, my girl fries Akara and sells before coming to work.
She is too attached to her twin, they do everything together. I wish I can help both but I can't.
My observation, the elder sister believes she raised her up and believes she should serve her, but I don't believe someone this good deserves more.

She saved and wrote jamb this year but now she has been discouraged and something in me is telling me I should help her.

I'm scared of finances anyway... But I believe I can do it.