A popular argument circling today is, “Shouldn’t we explore whether or not we are sexually compatible before we get married?”

This, to me, is one of the most silly arguments I have ever heard. “We have to fool around. How are we going to figure out if we are sexually compatible?” Are you a guy? Is she a girl? Then your parts are going to fit!

What people really mean when they advance this argument is that they are concerned about technique. But think about that for a moment. You may ask, “But what if he is a sloppy kisser?” "Or she doesn't like sex?" "Or he doesn't last long in bed?"

How do you even know what will satisfy you?
Many have already become sexual insecure, some sexually insatiable. Many young men are bonding not with a person but with a screen, some say in an attempt for sexual preparation.
Some become so dependent on the intensity of extreme explicit imagery to arouse them that they have essentially fried the circuitry so that they are no longer sensitive to normal or
slow-building stimuli like romance or dating.
And when they do get married,
they cannot achieve arousal to have sex with a real person, the excess stimulation has resulted in insensitivity. What arouses you controls your drive hence the endless search for sexual satisfaction.

If you are pursuing a man of character, a man who is gentle with you and caring, a man who listens to you, and who promises to love you in sickness and health until death do you part—if you have a man like that, who will lay down his life for you, do you really think he would not be open to some pointers on how to kiss?

More important than physicality: marry someone with character!

Ladies, find someone who is gentle, patient, understanding, and strong,
and all of that character will translate into the bedroom. Men, marry a woman who is responsive, tender, patient, and encouraging, and all of that character will translate into the bedroom. If you marry someone with character like that, you two will figure out how to be compatible in the bedroom together.

That is what the first year of marriage is for! You marry someone that has godly character, and the two of you will discover how to take care of each other’s needs sexually together and it will be fun. I promise! You do not need to figure that out while dating.

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