la seduce la regret

One thing I'd never forgive in marriage is a cheating partner.
But OP, you mentioned that you trust your wife. If you do, you'd take her words over that of her friend, unless the trust is really broken

culf:



yeah but I doubt if he will be patient for time to heal his hurt especially with aunty standing by to enjoy her friends "hotdog". May God help us all

Any wise man would know that aunty is up to no good and she aggravated the story to her advantage. Amen to God helping us all.

Ochason:
I wanted to post my story for advise and opinions on this matter.

My wife and I have been married for 8 years and we really have not had any issues until now. The whole situation started about 5 months ago. I think it was early January. We just launched our second business branch and my wife threw a party for us.I am into real estate and other strings of businesses. Last year was a good year for us. Our business grew and we expanded by opening one more branch office here in Port Harcourt (not real location). My wife,who is our Business development strategist came up with an office opening party so we can invite dignitaries and celebrities to come and even invest more in our businesses. My wife decided to engage her friend that is a top event planner to handle the event. The event was successful no doubt,everything was just glamorous. Then,there was another part of the event that moved to the club that night. We were all having fun. And then,my wife’s friend who planned the earlier event showed up looking really well dressed..more like very s*xy outfit. Of course,lot of people were dressed to kill at the party. In a lit party like this,one should expect some serious drinking and some inappropriate behaviors. It was clear,my wife’s friend was getting a little more than tipsy. She was doing a little too much and my wife was concerned. I tried to call my Driver to come take her home but the foolish guy was drinking somewhere and didnt pick my call. My wife agreed that I escort her friend to go sleep in our SUV until the Driver shows up. I guided her friend to our car and tried to get her inside to sleep but things took a different turn. She was drunk and started to pull me to kiss her. she was rubbing on me and telling me she wants me. I knew it was the alcohol talking but she kept on and on. Begging me to kiss her so she can sleep. No one was looking and I gave her a small kiss just to let her feel she got what she wanted. Of course she wanted more but I didn’t oblige her. I put on the AC for her and pulled the seat back for her to rest. As I walked away,I finally got through the Driver and he came to take her home. I thought that was the last I would hear of what just happened but I was wrong. Two days later,this lady starts to chat me and saying she wants to see me. I thought it was a joke. She said things like she knows I want her too cos I kissed her at the club 2 days ago. She kept confessing her love for me and how she cannot control herself. To be honest,this is not the first time women would throw themselves at me but this is the first time,a friend of my wife would do such a thing. I asked her what if my wife finds out and she replied me with a bomb: she said..she does not care because my wife is also not a saint. What?!!!!..what did she mean by that? I asked her to explain and she said she cannot tell me because she swore never to tell anyone but that my wife has definitely been with someone else but me.At this time,I was getting really worked up. I told her she was bluffing and she said I was being naive. I told her I would ask my wife…she said she would deny but that does not mean its not true. She would deny because she swore to keep my wife’s secret.
So,in order to play her game,I told her I would sleep with her if she told me who my wife was cheating with. She agreed. She sent me lots dirty messages and told me to meet her at a hotel that night. And then,I asked her: how do I know you are not trying to set me up and walking into a trap? My wife’s friend then gave details. She said my wife and I were having issues just a few months before our wedding,I said yes!…she said because of the issues…my wife was doubting my loyalty and she went back to her ex and slept with him. And that they were seeing each other even after we got married until like 4 months after marriage.
I knew this woman is desperate but this information she just released scattered my brain. I drove straight to see my wife and straight up told her what her friend just told me. My wife began to act shocked and pretend that her friend was lying so I told her, I have recorded conversations (which I really didn’t have)and if she pushed me to release these conversations, it would be over between us.
At that point,my wife broke down and started crying. She then confessed to having gone back to her ex when we were having issues weeks before our wedding. But she swore on her children’s’ lives that it did not continue after we got married.
However,her ex went to tell her friend that they were seeing each other which was a lie. That her ex wanted her back by all means and was telling lies that I was not treating her well and that she misses her ex and wants to come back but she is stuck in the marriage.
All these revelation was too much for me to bear. I told my wife to leave our home but she refused so I took a my things and went to the company guest house where I have been. I have been so angry and betrayed that I do not know what to do.
I never planned to be a divorcee. I love my wife. She is very instrumental to the success of my business …but how do we work through this when she has betrayed me like this? And she is insisting the affair ended when we got married….the affair before marriage is hurtful because we were still engaged even at that time but if it continued after…I cannot live like this.

How then,do I believe she may be telling the truth? Trust has been thrown out of the window. Our families have been trying to reconcile us but as a man,I have never been so hurt and emotional in all my life. I trusted my wife with all my life.

I finally agreed for us to see our Pastor last week to counsel us but it ended up in a disaster. I recognize I was still angry and I was shouting and my wife was crying uncontrollably saying I do not believe her but I believe a woman who is trying to ruin our marriage.

Well,if her friend is trying to ruin our marriage…she caused it..she allowed it. We both left distraught and later that night,the friend showed up in my guest house. She told me that she came to beg for me to forgive her friend. But you should have seen what she wore. The most see through outfit and as soon as I allowed her to sit down,she came hard on me.
Pushing her away was my first thought. But I felt so angry that I also wanted to revenge my wife and I started responding to her. I was ready to make love to this woman but I stopped and told her to leave. Since then,she has been determined to make me sleep with her.

I felt I needed space but the more space I need,the more s*xual temptations are coming my way. And yes,I would be justified if I give in right? After all…my wife did it first? Maybe if I did…I would feel better and maybe be able to forgive her after we are even.

I miss my wife but how do I trust her….I feel tempted to sleep with someone else. Its not that hard for men…I do not know how much more I can resist the temptation. How can I be sure that my wife is telling the truth? How do I know the affair ended after our marriage?

Will I be able to trust her again? Is there any hope for our marriage?

Affair that took place in the past,didn't harm you in any way and you want to spoil a marriage you claim to be happy in cause of it??

It's very easy for one to say "you'll get over it, give it time" when you have not felt the hurt of betrayal before.

Yes, you might get over it eventually, but if the hurt is from some you loved and completely trusted, it will literally tear you apart. You will break down! Depression might creep in and you will begin to understand why some resort to suicide, because the pain can be unbearable.

Juliearth:





Any wise man would know that aunty is up to no good and she aggravated the story to her advantage. Amen to God helping us all.

Yeah, you're right. its unfortunate she is using her Friend's secret for her own advantage.

culf:



Yeah, you're right. its unfortunate she is using her Friend's secret for her own advantage.

Such a shame. This should serve as a lesson to women (and men) out there. Crisis in relationships/ marriages are sometimes normal ( and even healthy.) It shouldn't be an avenue to contact an ex or cheat.

Juliearth:





Such a shame. This should serve as a lesson to women (and men) out there. Crisis in relationships/ marriages are sometimes normal ( and even healthy.) It shouldn't be an avenue to contact an ex or cheat.

you're right, funny enough, most people use it as opportunity to cheat.

SweetCunt97:
Look at this man o, allowing viper into your home! Deed has been done long ago and you wanna carry it on ur head like gala now?

You guys weren't married when d shii went down so let it slide.

Please, when you get engaged, screw your ex and somehow let it leak to your fiance.

Thank me later.

uthlaw:
Very complicated issue but just try forgive her and move on

you had to quote the who thing just to type this meaningless thing

Ochason:


And yes,I would be justified if I give in right? After all…my wife did it first? Maybe if I did…I would feel better and maybe be able to forgive her after we are even.

Bro..... did your wife ever cheated on you since married?... for eight years? Your problem is not your wife.... but you. All this long talk is for one reason..... to justify sleeping with your wife's friend. Why are you never once upset with the friend?... who is trying to scatter your marriage? Your wife cheated on you before you got married..... because of relationship issues . Here you are 8 years later creating relationship issues. History has a way of repeating itself.... keep pushing her over .inor matters.

anochuko01:
you had to quote the who thing just to type this meaningless thing

no reason the matter,make d guy just forgive the babe....no big deal!

The truth you seek is all over the post. just too blind to patch them and see through.

Those balls inbtw your legs are not emotional, but rational and analytic.

Ask yourself these questions and your answers should guide your paths:

1. Why did her so Called friend tell you about the secret? and why, after letting the cat outa da bag, she came to see you in the seductress see_thru, and in that state of yours, she still wanted to get down with you?

Do you think she actually have your best interest at heart?
What kinda friend wud not only betray trust but try to have you also?

2. Do you know that after every win, that are usually battles because the enemies are not always happy with our success?


3. For 8 years, you've been with your wife and not for once did she give you any reason to suspect her.
Why are you finding it hard to know when she is telling the truth or not?
8 years is not 8 days. you should know when your wife is lying especially given the fact that you confronted her apruptly and she didn't have time to prepare her defense.

4. Are you not giving room to the devil to exploit the more by staying away from your wife and widening the chasm? are you not letting the enemy win the war by been so irrational and emotional?
What if you sleep with another Jezebel now and contact a terminal desease?


I don't support infidelity in any shade but as a man, you must learn to read meaning into situations and take proactive steps . don't play into the hands of the enemies. this is not about your wife cheating, it is. ABOUT BREALING UP YOUR LOVELY HOME.
And yes, if you have kids, run a paternity test on all of them. anything that can help you have peace of mind. life's too short bro.


If you guys can pull thru this, the bond btw you wud be heavy-weight stronger.

Take a deep breath. go back home, pull your wify close and just hug her so tight and for a while.

You both need each other now more than ever.

and as for that Jezebel, cut her off your family for life!

Hi,

Kissing your wife's friend is cheating, you know? Yes, your wife cheated before you got married and that's horrible but you also did while married.

Ensure the friend no longer has access to your family, and attend couple's counselling with an actual psychologist. You should be able to work things out. Come clean about kissing the friend and tell her everything the friend keeps doing.


Goodluck.

uthlaw:
no reason the matter,make d guy just forgive the babe....no big deal!

you quoting the whole post was my problem actually

anochuko01:

you quoting the whole post was my problem actually

no ves boss!

bullshit.. and so what? kill yourself na

Michelle55:

Chai.. All these sensational topics eh can give someone hbp. Thank you for saving me the stress of dishing any advice

Sensational yes but they happen daily in real life

Good day Ochason.

I just came across your post few days ago but I couldn't go through it because of my schedule.

Is it possible we could talk offline?

You can drop your phone number or call me on 09026645338.

Please don't allow yourself to fall by the way side, trying to get even.

It doesn't always end well.

Pray and seek the Lord's will.

Don't divorce your wife. What she did was before marriage if you cheat that is adultery. Just seek more counseling and try to resolve the matter

Ochason:
I wanted to post my story for advise and opinions on this matter.

My wife and I have been married for 8 years and we really have not had any issues until now. The whole situation started about 5 months ago. I think it was early January. We just launched our second business branch and my wife threw a party for us.I am into real estate and other strings of businesses. Last year was a good year for us. Our business grew and we expanded by opening one more branch office here in Port Harcourt (not real location). My wife,who is our Business development strategist came up with an office opening party so we can invite dignitaries and celebrities to come and even invest more in our businesses. My wife decided to engage her friend that is a top event planner to handle the event. The event was successful no doubt,everything was just glamorous. Then,there was another part of the event that moved to the club that night. We were all having fun. And then,my wife’s friend who planned the earlier event showed up looking really well dressed..more like very s*xy outfit. Of course,lot of people were dressed to kill at the party. In a lit party like this,one should expect some serious drinking and some inappropriate behaviors. It was clear,my wife’s friend was getting a little more than tipsy. She was doing a little too much and my wife was concerned. I tried to call my Driver to come take her home but the foolish guy was drinking somewhere and didnt pick my call. My wife agreed that I escort her friend to go sleep in our SUV until the Driver shows up. I guided her friend to our car and tried to get her inside to sleep but things took a different turn. She was drunk and started to pull me to kiss her. she was rubbing on me and telling me she wants me. I knew it was the alcohol talking but she kept on and on. Begging me to kiss her so she can sleep. No one was looking and I gave her a small kiss just to let her feel she got what she wanted. Of course she wanted more but I didn’t oblige her. I put on the AC for her and pulled the seat back for her to rest. As I walked away,I finally got through the Driver and he came to take her home. I thought that was the last I would hear of what just happened but I was wrong. Two days later,this lady starts to chat me and saying she wants to see me. I thought it was a joke. She said things like she knows I want her too cos I kissed her at the club 2 days ago. She kept confessing her love for me and how she cannot control herself. To be honest,this is not the first time women would throw themselves at me but this is the first time,a friend of my wife would do such a thing. I asked her what if my wife finds out and she replied me with a bomb: she said..she does not care because my wife is also not a saint. What?!!!!..what did she mean by that? I asked her to explain and she said she cannot tell me because she swore never to tell anyone but that my wife has definitely been with someone else but me.At this time,I was getting really worked up. I told her she was bluffing and she said I was being naive. I told her I would ask my wife…she said she would deny but that does not mean its not true. She would deny because she swore to keep my wife’s secret.
So,in order to play her game,I told her I would sleep with her if she told me who my wife was cheating with. She agreed. She sent me lots dirty messages and told me to meet her at a hotel that night. And then,I asked her: how do I know you are not trying to set me up and walking into a trap? My wife’s friend then gave details. She said my wife and I were having issues just a few months before our wedding,I said yes!…she said because of the issues…my wife was doubting my loyalty and she went back to her ex and slept with him. And that they were seeing each other even after we got married until like 4 months after marriage.
I knew this woman is desperate but this information she just released scattered my brain. I drove straight to see my wife and straight up told her what her friend just told me. My wife began to act shocked and pretend that her friend was lying so I told her, I have recorded conversations (which I really didn’t have)and if she pushed me to release these conversations, it would be over between us.
At that point,my wife broke down and started crying. She then confessed to having gone back to her ex when we were having issues weeks before our wedding. But she swore on her children’s’ lives that it did not continue after we got married.
However,her ex went to tell her friend that they were seeing each other which was a lie. That her ex wanted her back by all means and was telling lies that I was not treating her well and that she misses her ex and wants to come back but she is stuck in the marriage.
All these revelation was too much for me to bear. I told my wife to leave our home but she refused so I took a my things and went to the company guest house where I have been. I have been so angry and betrayed that I do not know what to do.
I never planned to be a divorcee. I love my wife. She is very instrumental to the success of my business …but how do we work through this when she has betrayed me like this? And she is insisting the affair ended when we got married….the affair before marriage is hurtful because we were still engaged even at that time but if it continued after…I cannot live like this.

How then,do I believe she may be telling the truth? Trust has been thrown out of the window. Our families have been trying to reconcile us but as a man,I have never been so hurt and emotional in all my life. I trusted my wife with all my life.

I finally agreed for us to see our Pastor last week to counsel us but it ended up in a disaster. I recognize I was still angry and I was shouting and my wife was crying uncontrollably saying I do not believe her but I believe a woman who is trying to ruin our marriage.

Well,if her friend is trying to ruin our marriage…she caused it..she allowed it. We both left distraught and later that night,the friend showed up in my guest house. She told me that she came to beg for me to forgive her friend. But you should have seen what she wore. The most see through outfit and as soon as I allowed her to sit down,she came hard on me.
Pushing her away was my first thought. But I felt so angry that I also wanted to revenge my wife and I started responding to her. I was ready to make love to this woman but I stopped and told her to leave. Since then,she has been determined to make me sleep with her.

I felt I needed space but the more space I need,the more s*xual temptations are coming my way. And yes,I would be justified if I give in right? After all…my wife did it first? Maybe if I did…I would feel better and maybe be able to forgive her after we are even.

I miss my wife but how do I trust her….I feel tempted to sleep with someone else. Its not that hard for men…I do not know how much more I can resist the temptation. How can I be sure that my wife is telling the truth? How do I know the affair ended after our marriage?

Will I be able to trust her again? Is there any hope for our marriage?

I don't know why most ladies of today like putting people at a cross road. She would have sort for a way to settle your probs but because she has not actually let her ex go, she quickly went to him. I cant even advise you on this matter because I am as angry as you are.

Ochason:
I wanted to post my story for advise and opinions on this matter.

My wife and I have been married for 8 years and we really have not had any issues until now. The whole situation started about 5 months ago. I think it was early January. We just launched our second business branch and my wife threw a party for us.I am into real estate and other strings of businesses. Last year was a good year for us. Our business grew and we expanded by opening one more branch office here in Port Harcourt (not real location). My wife,who is our Business development strategist came up with an office opening party so we can invite dignitaries and celebrities to come and even invest more in our businesses. My wife decided to engage her friend that is a top event planner to handle the event. The event was successful no doubt,everything was just glamorous. Then,there was another part of the event that moved to the club that night. We were all having fun. And then,my wife’s friend who planned the earlier event showed up looking really well dressed..more like very s*xy outfit. Of course,lot of people were dressed to kill at the party. In a lit party like this,one should expect some serious drinking and some inappropriate behaviors. It was clear,my wife’s friend was getting a little more than tipsy. She was doing a little too much and my wife was concerned. I tried to call my Driver to come take her home but the foolish guy was drinking somewhere and didnt pick my call. My wife agreed that I escort her friend to go sleep in our SUV until the Driver shows up. I guided her friend to our car and tried to get her inside to sleep but things took a different turn. She was drunk and started to pull me to kiss her. she was rubbing on me and telling me she wants me. I knew it was the alcohol talking but she kept on and on. Begging me to kiss her so she can sleep. No one was looking and I gave her a small kiss just to let her feel she got what she wanted. Of course she wanted more but I didn’t oblige her. I put on the AC for her and pulled the seat back for her to rest. As I walked away,I finally got through the Driver and he came to take her home. I thought that was the last I would hear of what just happened but I was wrong. Two days later,this lady starts to chat me and saying she wants to see me. I thought it was a joke. She said things like she knows I want her too cos I kissed her at the club 2 days ago. She kept confessing her love for me and how she cannot control herself. To be honest,this is not the first time women would throw themselves at me but this is the first time,a friend of my wife would do such a thing. I asked her what if my wife finds out and she replied me with a bomb: she said..she does not care because my wife is also not a saint. What?!!!!..what did she mean by that? I asked her to explain and she said she cannot tell me because she swore never to tell anyone but that my wife has definitely been with someone else but me.At this time,I was getting really worked up. I told her she was bluffing and she said I was being naive. I told her I would ask my wife…she said she would deny but that does not mean its not true. She would deny because she swore to keep my wife’s secret.
So,in order to play her game,I told her I would sleep with her if she told me who my wife was cheating with. She agreed. She sent me lots dirty messages and told me to meet her at a hotel that night. And then,I asked her: how do I know you are not trying to set me up and walking into a trap? My wife’s friend then gave details. She said my wife and I were having issues just a few months before our wedding,I said yes!…she said because of the issues…my wife was doubting my loyalty and she went back to her ex and slept with him. And that they were seeing each other even after we got married until like 4 months after marriage.
I knew this woman is desperate but this information she just released scattered my brain. I drove straight to see my wife and straight up told her what her friend just told me. My wife began to act shocked and pretend that her friend was lying so I told her, I have recorded conversations (which I really didn’t have)and if she pushed me to release these conversations, it would be over between us.
At that point,my wife broke down and started crying. She then confessed to having gone back to her ex when we were having issues weeks before our wedding. But she swore on her children’s’ lives that it did not continue after we got married.
However,her ex went to tell her friend that they were seeing each other which was a lie. That her ex wanted her back by all means and was telling lies that I was not treating her well and that she misses her ex and wants to come back but she is stuck in the marriage.
All these revelation was too much for me to bear. I told my wife to leave our home but she refused so I took a my things and went to the company guest house where I have been. I have been so angry and betrayed that I do not know what to do.
I never planned to be a divorcee. I love my wife. She is very instrumental to the success of my business …but how do we work through this when she has betrayed me like this? And she is insisting the affair ended when we got married….the affair before marriage is hurtful because we were still engaged even at that time but if it continued after…I cannot live like this.

How then,do I believe she may be telling the truth? Trust has been thrown out of the window. Our families have been trying to reconcile us but as a man,I have never been so hurt and emotional in all my life. I trusted my wife with all my life.

I finally agreed for us to see our Pastor last week to counsel us but it ended up in a disaster. I recognize I was still angry and I was shouting and my wife was crying uncontrollably saying I do not believe her but I believe a woman who is trying to ruin our marriage.

Well,if her friend is trying to ruin our marriage…she caused it..she allowed it. We both left distraught and later that night,the friend showed up in my guest house. She told me that she came to beg for me to forgive her friend. But you should have seen what she wore. The most see through outfit and as soon as I allowed her to sit down,she came hard on me.
Pushing her away was my first thought. But I felt so angry that I also wanted to revenge my wife and I started responding to her. I was ready to make love to this woman but I stopped and told her to leave. Since then,she has been determined to make me sleep with her.

I felt I needed space but the more space I need,the more s*xual temptations are coming my way. And yes,I would be justified if I give in right? After all…my wife did it first? Maybe if I did…I would feel better and maybe be able to forgive her after we are even.

I miss my wife but how do I trust her….I feel tempted to sleep with someone else. Its not that hard for men…I do not know how much more I can resist the temptation. How can I be sure that my wife is telling the truth? How do I know the affair ended after our marriage?

Will I be able to trust her again? Is there any hope for our marriage?

Men shaa.

*
"small cheating " from a woman and you wanna die.
Meanwhile,you lots will be sleeping around with numerous side Chics and your wives will swallow it