It is well, God will strengthen you. I'll suggest you talk to her one and one and discuss your findings with her, and if after that she didn't feel remorse or neither support you financially pls relocate and restrategise your life .don't worry about the kid he'll be fine , but for now I'll advice you walk away to where you will be sane and double your hustle.

Hathor5:
Nobody wants to read the other side of the story?

There is nothing to read again, the man has said it all, some women are terrible!

ikemesit4477:
There is nothing to read again, the man has said it all, some women are terrible!

You don't know if he said it all until you hear the other side.

It is well o

I feel your pain, Man men marriage becomes scary by the day i have been there sir, i can relate what u are saying. even at the point of marriage my fiance then misbehaved and decide to follow her own way. May God deliver us from selfish women and terrible women. A woman that does not understand that marriage is partnership wont value marriage. please talk to her and if she can not reason with you, pick the piece of your life and ,ove on and start all over again, you have fought for her and stood by her and its now time for her to reciprocate what you have done is heartless and has no concern for you. Your son is your priority for now, ensure you give him the best no matter how. For your wife building house without your knowledge and consent speaks volume. In the first place she should not take the step to get a land and build a house without your knowledge, this means she does not see you as her head and this is terrible. I pray God leads you, its not easy but He will help u.

Sunmars:
I am actually an old member so I will have to go incognito. If you think this is a made up story, that's your business.
Lest I forget, mods, pls don't take this story to frontpage.
I have been married for close to 7 years now. Its been one hell of a journey. In hindsight, I wondered how I got here.
I have supported this woman with the little I have. Life has been good to others but mine has been a struggle. I had to struggle to get anything I want.
To be fair to her, she was supportive during some rough patches in my life. Maybe I supposed it was because we were not married then, and she was playing the good girl.
If I had acted on my hunch then, I would have noticed her anger issue ( another topic) and moved on. She really tried in concealing it sha.
A year into our marriage, she became ill. Terribly ill. When test was conducted, she was HIV positive. I cried bitterly that night. My tears was not because I have become infected, I cried because I thought I was the one who infected her( I was sort of a G then and had numerous affairs).
We went to the hospital next day and a test was run on me and I came out negative. Did in 2 other places and was still negative even till date. The Doctors said we were discordant couple ( learnt that day that some few people on earth has natural immunity)
I was at a cross-road. Should I go or stay. Well, I decided to stay. The day I took her for counseling and first drugs, the counselor and doctors thought I was her brother. When they learnt i was her husband, they were shocked. They shook my hands and congratulated me for not bailing out. The counselor told me that several marriages and relationships has broken up in his office.

Well we moved on and even had a son whom I adore so much ( he is negative too)
I have been supportive to my family even though I wasn't so rich. I was the one who suggested
She buy a land when she got a loan from her office. Supported her in getting her MBA.
When I started my M.Sc, my father came down with stroke and I had to stop. His health gulped so much and I was even scammed by one fake traditional healer. Nine years later, I decided to try and get my M.Sc. unfortunately, my beloved dad left this earth and I had to stop again. tough luck.
Once again, the burial gulped much. Not because I wanted to be flamboyant but there were lots of roadblocks ahead to tackle.
I had to work on the house he couldn't complete due to his illness. Had to also pay several dues, levies and even fines.
My brother's wife and mine were find 190k because they didnt not come down to put their names in the women's record book in the village.
My brother's wife could be excused because she didn't know but my wife was told by my mum severally but she feigned busy cos of job.But the truth is she didn't want to go. I didn't take it serious too until my father died and the village insisted I must paid every lobo before my dad could be buried. I and my brother coughed out over 400k to settle all this before we started the burial proper.( not forgetting the house too).
Something happened during the burial. While I was busy running around ( looking like a mad man) thinking how to raise 190k to settle the wives fine, for a burial that was just less than a week away. My mother-in law called my wife and told her on phone that if we can't settle the issue, she should park her bags and leave next day for the city. I was shocked but couldn't respond because I was so engrossed with preparation.
Now to the latest development.
Immediately after the burial, the country entered into the lockdown phase. I was so financially drained but I was happy the burial has come and gone. But the downside was that my salary ( I earn commission,not fixed salary) was slashed into two. Since most of my clients were affected like most nigerians, my earning dropped dangerously. Then came the landlady.(most landladies are hell). All attempt to explain to her that I just returned from a burial that drained me coupled with the effect of the lockdown fell on deaf ears. I told her I was gonna give her 6 months rent and clear the rest later was met with stiff resistance. She bluntly told me if I can pay to the last kobo, I should leave her apartment.I shared the story with my wife and she claimed no money.
One day I was with a friend in his office and something just came to my mind. I asked her to help me check an account balance.[/b] Lo and behold, the account contained 1.8M. It was my wife account.[b] I was dazed but I didn't tell her.
She is currently building her house while I am having gray hairs thinking of how to raise money for a new rent. When I mentioned I wanted to move from this nice neighborhood to a place on the outskirts of town, she immediately told me she will go stay with her mother as the place will be too far from her place of work and my son's school. She initially accused me of trying to separate her from her family by planning to move to the outskirts of town while I was only trying to find a not so expensive area I can afford for now.
Well, its painful but I can't even raise the required funds. I am just feeling down cos I might have to settle for a single room. Thsts what i can conveniently afford.I feel terribly depressed about this turn of events.
I wonder how it's gonna be be. I don't look down on those in a room apartment, just that I have never experienced this before.
My major concern is my son. I love him dearly. I can't afford to stay a day without seeing him. He is going to miss me too. Every morning he wakes up, he always look around for me if he doesn't see me when he wakes up. Its going to crush me leaving away from him( he should stay with his mum for now)
Tears are rolling down my eyes right now as I watch him seating down engrossed in his Disney junior cartoon program, oblivious of what is coming in the coming weeks
.

Things will be better. I am hopeful next year will be better. This year brought much pain and hardship but I am trusting God he will help me on my feet by next year but I don't think this woman will be allowed back to my life. Maybe im wrong, maybe I am not, time shall tell.
I just need encouragement from people who have weathered storms before.
.once again, mods, don't take this to front page

this is one of the reasons I just get fed up about relationships ,how wife go day hide money from e husband even if person dash u ,still show am ,...

sometimes I just feel doing this baby mama things is just better ,when the man is 43 years of age just look for a woman who is mature and in her 40s and marry her be it a widow or a divorce woman abeg

@OP,
this is just a manifestation of the rot in your marriage. Your marriage has not been in a good place and this is just one of the symptoms coming forth.
Yes, you can list out all the good you have done for her, am sure she will have her own list of sacrifices too. But the question is, why is your wife insecure? why is she planning and securing her future without you? you said it yourself that she wasn't always like this. why has she hardened her heart towards you?
You two have to stop hurting each other and have a heart to heart talk, get to the bottom of the matter and address it if you can. Life is too short to live in frustration. Have a sit down with her, and ask her her pain points in the marriage, then you can also table yours. Make sure it doesn't degenerate into a blame fest . i wish you well.

Hathor5:
Nobody wants to read the other side of the story?

I want to, if you have the other side of the story please share now.

This is really shocking . . . I don't even know what to say.