This article was originally written by an Australian woman, Miranda Devine.

Sometime ago, a wave of female umbrage greeted a research study which found there are health risks for women who put off having children till after age 35. "Older mothers slam age shame" was one angry headline about the Monash University research into 133,000 women in Victoria, Australia, which warned that older mothers posed a "greater potential burden" on the health system.

No one was telling older women not to have babies or saying they won't have a perfect delivery. The study simply reported the unavoidable fact that fertility declines with age, and that the risk of some complications doubles. Knowing the truth should help women inform their life decisions, and avoid heartache down the road.

But the irate reaction suggests some would rather bury their heads in the sand. The hostility was symptomatic of a female entitlement mentality (FEM), which means always getting what you want, when you want it, even in defiance of reality and other people's wishes. Increasingly in our narcissistic age we see this deluded self-belief and inflated sense of importance, from baby boomers to 13-year-old princesses.

At its extreme, it manifests in stars of reality shows such as The Real Housewives of Orange County, women whose lives are an epic monument to selfishness. FEM is the end product of a culture that places self-esteem and empowerment above fairness and common sense. For 3 generations, women have been told growing up that they are can have it all, do anything, and have unlimited freedom of choice. This was terrific for women to break free of oppression and achieve equality.

But along the way we forgot that some restrictions on freedom must exist, if you are not to trample on the rights of other people and if you accept certain biological realities. Now, an inflated sense of entitlement means you lash out and blame others when you don't get everything you believe you deserve.

Take the case of the woman suing Geelong Grammar School because she did not get a high enough mark to get into the course of her choice. Most people might accept the disappointment as bad luck, a sign of their own limitations or a spur to work harder. But not Rose Ashton-Weir, 18. She felt entitled to a place at the University of Sydney law school.

Or the case of the Australian woman who divorced her Italian husband and took their 4 Italian-born daughters back to Australia, where she now wants to live. She defied a Family Court order that the girls, who are in their teens, should return to Italy, and has now been feted in the media, and championed by her local Liberal MP. The father says he loves his daughters and wants them home and the full bench of the court agrees. But the mother wants what she wants, so she's sent the children into hiding.

Then there are those women who insist on having home births, even in high-risk pregnancies, ignoring medical advice that the baby could die. Their entitlement to a personally-fulfilling experience trumps the right of their unborn child to the safest possible birth.

But it's on the dating scene where the entitlement mentality hits a brick wall. "A lot of women have a materialistic, shopping list mentality," says dating agency owner Della Cory. "It's true women have to know their rights and get their needs met, but they also need to be aware with men that if you come across with an air of haughtiness and entitlement, bordering on arrogance, it's a turn-off."

Veteran match-maker Yvonne Allen, after connecting professional singles for 37 years, is at her wits' end to find partners for women with inflated self-esteem. "I'm so concerned about what I see happening with relationships; men are feeling deballed," she said.

One typical client, a businesswoman in her late 30s, complained about 3 men the agency had introduced her to.
"They weren't suitable in her mind because none of them called her back. It was our agency's fault," she said. Allen has found success for her clients by telling them some home truths . . . she has taught them humility! Life is a lot more pleasant when you are honest about its limitations.

SOURCE: https://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/news/opinion/miranda-devine-women-believe-they-live-in-the-age-of-entitlement/news-story/e4a1b901c0e55baa2517887ff8bbb072

Anyone with a keen sense of observation would have noticed the trend about how the female sense of entitlement is at an astronomical high, one wouldn't need a research study for this but yea, it's what it is.

The best any man can do for himself is to avoid such women, or if already with one, he should not feed/satisfy her unhealthy complexes. Although there's a possibility she may step out on you to find succor in the arms of another man (and these men do abound) who won't mind putting her on a pedestal at the detriment of his own self-esteem, this however ought not to be a problem – it's simply good riddance.
Let another brother be her white knight.

The last thing you want to do as a man is to pander to a woman's feelings of entitlement in the hopes that she'll love you more, respect you more, and never leave you – this is a lie, a lie they sell hoping we won't know any better.

One typical client, a businesswoman in her late 30s, complained about 3 men the agency had introduced her to. "They weren't suitable in her mind because none of them called her back. It was our agency's fault," she said.

I mean take a look at this one, as far she's concerned she isn't the one with the issues.

Just imagine being married to or being in a relationship with someone like this, lol...

prof2007:

... Or the case of the Australian woman who divorced her Italian husband and took their 4 Italian-born daughters back to Australia, where she now wants to live. She defied a Family Court order that the girls, who are in their teens, should return to Italy.

The father says he loves his daughters and wants them home and the full bench of the court agrees. But the mother wants what she wants, so she's sent the children into hiding.

Vraiment incroyable!

Men be more assertive and be vision driven; you will automatically weed these entitled women.

:/

Guys should avoid such women.. Simple

bukatyne:
Men be more assertive and be vision driven; you will automatically weed these entitled women.

Excellent advice! Unfortunately, in many places, these entitled, unreasonable (or even toxic) girls now make up the vast majority of the female population.

Consequently, the good, virtuous or reasonable women aren't enough to go round for the "visionary and assertive" men.

What do you advise in such a situation?

DeFuturePresido:


Excellent advice! Unfortunately, in many places, these entitled, unreasonable (or even toxic) girls now make up the vast majority of the female population.

Consequently, the good, virtuous or reasonable women aren't enough to go round for the "visionary and assertive" men.

What do you advise in such a situation?

The visionary and assertive men aren't much either.

So they would go round nicely

bukatyne:


The visionary and assertive men aren't much either.

So they would go round nicely

Hmm, I love Ur first advice but this u said hmmmm


U said it like life is nollywood

bukatyne:


The visionary and assertive men aren't much either.

So they would go round nicely

Great riposte, Bukatyne. However, I meant this as a practical question, not a critical, satirical or sentimental one.

Ergo, let's consider the reality on ground: how many men (assertive or no) would spend two hours before a mirror, put on revealing clothes and go prancing about hoping to be picked up by a lady with more money than common sense?

While not denying the existence of gigolos, and while agreeing that assertive / visionary men are scarce, I find it really hard to believe that the good women would go round nicely.

In my line of work, I am finding this to be a recurring and ever-greater challenge. Basically, I am seeking sincere suggestions for the purpose of helping those who consult me in this regard.

Avec toutes mes plus sincères salutations.

Thank God the article wasn't written by a male nairalander. Vagina people, come and do your thing on this thread.

nuelyoyo:
Thank God the article wasn't written by a male nairalander. Vagina people, come and do your thing on this thread.

You lack home training. I do hope your children won't get to see how immature their father is in the future cos obviously you are a teenager.

LadySarah:


You lack home training. I do hope your children won't get to see how immature their father is in the future cos obviously you are a teenager.

Nwayoo! O gini n'akpotu di?

All these bashing for just a simple response?

StubbornGENIUS:
Nwayoo! O gini n'akpotu di?
All these bashing for just a simple response?

Nut puru onye ahu n'isi!

LadySarah:


You lack home training. I do hope your children won't get to see how immature their father is in the future cos obviously you are a teenager.

The way some of you throw this teenager word on NL sef, I can type like a 60 years old man if I want to, you will still give me likes and shares. But I chose to type what you quoted up there.

Their brains are wired that way..

Only servile men do take women with air of haughtiness and entitlement seriously - the crass and opportunistic woman. Funnily, they do find it hard to handle rejection. Of course, show me a servile man, or woman, and I will point to you a disingenuous man.

I doff my hat for all conscientious women.

RightsToReject:
Only servile men do take women with an air of haughtiness and entitlement serious - the crass and opportunistic woman. Funnily, they do find it hard to handle rejection. Of course, show me a servile man, or woman, and I will point to you a disingenuous man.

I doff my hat for all conscientious women.

Women can't handle one hundredth of what they dish to men.

@thread's title, in other news, water is wet.

It's in both men and women, though the later seems to be more visible in our society at present.

Mandela27:
Their brains are wired that way..

Nobody is completely selfless.

Having a sense of entitlement is believing that you deserve certain privileges — and being arrogant about getting them.

Apparently, too many Nigerian women believe that the moment a guy becomes their boyfriend, his money becomes theirs. It’s almost as if saying yes to a guy is entering into an agreement to co-own his bank account and its contents. Way too many Nigerian ladies actually do feel entitled to your money just because they are your girlfriend.

Because many are ever hoping for that luxurious life they never had a taste of, girls grow up wanting men who would spoil them, guys who would spend all the money, 'use enjoyment to kill them' and grant them access to all the perks that come with wealth. Many women still hope to become rich and live the good life just by relationship or marriage to a rich man.

The idea that a boyfriend does not have any obligation to give you any part of his money will sound alien to some ladies reading this, and it is absolutely understandable. This is because for such a long time, the dating culture around here has been that unless you are willing to spend as a guy, you’re not ready to be in a relationship.

If you have always thought differently, this will be a bitter pill to swallow but you need to know that your boo does not owe you ANY of those things he gives or does for you. No one owes you anything. Not at all.

...Above paragraphs are quoted from a Pulse.Ng article by Ayoola Adetayo on 23 Sept 2019:

https://www.pulse.ng/lifestyle/relationships-weddings/when-will-women-stop-feeling-entitled-to-boyfriends-money/zjf50gx

Mariangeles:


Nobody is completely selfless.

That is true, but the challenge comes when someone who is 90-99% selfish pretends to be in a relationship with someone who is 5-10% selfish.

Sooner or later, the Centre will no longer hold, and things will fall apart. By that time, relationships with family and friends, careers, reputations, and bank accounts might all have been damaged beyond repair.

If you find yourself on the wrong end of the entitlement stick, here are some useful suggestions:

5 WAYS TO WORK ON ENTITLEMENT TENDENCIES

1. Practice perspective-taking:
Take a recent example of a time you got annoyed with someone and spend 3 minutes writing about the situation from the other person’s perspective. Practice understanding what their agenda was.

2. Sensitize yourself to how good it feels to promote other people’s successes:
There is an area of social psychology research called capitalization research, which shows that promoting other people’s successes has a positive effect on the sharer. To make a project out of it, try promoting someone else other than yourself at least once a day for 30 days.

3. Use cognitive restructuring:
Take any of the entitlement tendencies you can relate to and consider alternative evidence and perspectives. For example, what are some reasons the same rules that apply to everyone else should also apply to you? What are some reasons why keeping peace and avoiding upsetting or offending people (unless absolutely necessary) is a virtue? What are some examples of how people are generally more generous to you than you are to them?

4. Observe what happens when you curb your entitlement tendencies:
Do relationships run smoother? Do you find it's easier for you to sustain relationships without you burning other people out? Do you end up feeling less annoyance? Do people end up supporting you more because you’re supporting them? Understanding when curbing your entitlement tendencies actually benefits you is a great way to reinforce making changes.

5. Catch yourself if you fall into the moral licensing trap:
Moral licensing is a cognitive distortion in which people internally justify things they do that are wrong. It’s a common tendency; see if you can catch yourself doing it. For example, develop mindful awareness of thoughts like “It’s okay to take more than I give in X situation because...”

SOURCE: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/in-practice/201303/9-types-entitlement-tendencies-and-how-overcome-them

Mariangeles:

Nobody is completely selfless.

Kind of.But they are hard to come by anyway.

WHAT EXACTLY IS ENTITLEMENT MENTALITY?
Have you ever met someone who seems to act like the whole world owes them? Someone who is not satisfied unless their own needs are being met? Trying to deal with someone who acts this way can feel frustrating. In society, this type of behavior typically attracts strong criticism and condemnation.

If this sounds like someone you know, you may be dealing with someone who has a sense of entitlement. A sense of entitlement is defined as "an unrealistic, unmerited, or inappropriate expectation of favorable living conditions and favorable treatment at the hands of others."

SOURCE: https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/personality-disorders/the-psychology-behind-sense-of-entitlement/