So I'm here again.

Before I start, just to put a disclaimer; the purpose of this discourse isn't in anyway to malign or cajole people who choose to remain celibate before marriage for what ever reason; but just to share my experience and stire real thoughts within people.


So I happen to come from a very big family; my eldest sister ( big sis), happens to be the very religious type, this is very much evident by she currently being a pastor; yes she's a pastor in one of the new generation churches.

My big sis has always been the very religious type, right from when I was as young as I can remember, she exuded it and loved religiousness; she continued in that light;, the same reason I believe caused her into dating a pastor; yeah!
My sister; I grew up with I can vouch for, knowing how diligent she is and with endearing affections I can only remember her for. She's lovely.

So yes; she happened to have also dated a pastor from the same church (in a no sex relationship) as would be expected, this would later culminate into a consummate union as they tied the nuptial knots 14 years ago.

All this while and till date big sis hasn't had a child, NON . when we (myself and other siblings) were asking her what's up earlier , she picks offence when any of such is mentioned; saying she believes and has spoken by faith , that a child is within, and so shall it be; well at a time we all gave up and left her to her faith, perhaps she's happy that way.. My other sisters (her younger ones) whom she first got married long before , had all conceived with some of their kids already in secondary schools. Alas my big sis is still there.

The reality of situation is now telling on her seriously, currently my big sis is battling severe depression, very severe depression that's already causing her go mental battles.

That is my story.

My Thoughts

If big sis had tested the "waters" before going into that marriage could things have taken a different course?

If she had left vain religiousness(superstition) as predominant in Nigeria, and be more practicable with issues ; perhaps solutions might have been sought and this dire phase of her life could have been averted...

Has religion done more harm to people? in a way it completely erodes every sensibility and knowledge that an average human should exude . BTW I forgot to mention, my sis is well read and satisfactorily educated.


Quite a pathetic story. What do you think?

The question here is what has pre marital sex got to do with childbirth because there's absolutely no correlation whatsoever.

What has no sex relationship got to do with her childlessness. I don't subscribe to any religion and stuff but you haven't been able to prove that her celibate lifestyle caused her not to conceive

Na so my late aunt go fall put for one so-called pastor hand. A very vocal comical woman.

She say the first night she wait, no action, the next day, same no action after wedding oh.

Na him she begin ask brother question come find out say bros thing no dey work him just marry her to cover face. Na so my aunt cry out oh, pack her kaya go back house.

Premarital sex has nothing to do with the ability to conceive.

Medical tests for both husband and wife will help with the necessary steps towards conception.

Good luck

Faith without works is dead.

The earlier Christians learn this, the better.

Faith and works would never be interchangeable.

Except your sister has confided in you that her husband is the problem, I don't know how you concluded that celibacy caused their issues.

They have been trying for 14 years. Have they been to the hospital for tests? Seem any specialist?

If this same pastor told your sister to be pregnant before marriage, wouldn't you guys be the first to cry foul?

Or are they taking only faithatrin?

Like people above said, even if she had pre marital sex, what difference would it make anyway since its mostly not done for child bearing bt enjoyment.

Even if she knew b4 marriage (with pre marital sex like u claimed) is it not d same treatment given to both single and married people that are impotent/barren

If u were speaking for d man now its understandable BT hw are we sure its not d man's problem

daddytime:
Na so my late aunt go fall put for one so-called pastor hand. A very vocal comical woman.

She say the first night she wait, no action, the next day, same no action after wedding oh.

Na him she begin ask brother question come find out say bros thing no dey work him just marry her to cover face. Na so my aunt cry out oh, pack her kaya go back house.

80 out of 100 people that practice no sex before marriage are impotent and infertile. About 10 of remaining 20 people are frigid by nature.

I always remember what Machiavelli said in his popular book of strategy The Prince
"Any man who tries to be good all the time is bound to come to ruin among the great number who are not good."

galantjoe:


80 out of 100 people that practice no sex before marriage are impotent and infertile. About 10 of remaining 20 people are frigid by nature.

I always remember what Machiavelli said in his popular book of strategy The Prince
"Any man who tries to be good all the time is bound to come to ruin among the great number who are not good."

Hahahahaha. I love this.

This post reeks ignorance.

Who signs a player without watching him play

Does her religion beliefs stop her from getting medical help or doing the needful?

The only thing I can say is that religion makes people rigid in their thinking. The problem is not because your elder sister didn't practice premarital sex, the problem is that she believed prayers will solve her physical/biological problems.

I'd rather you put up your argument on the path of religious rigidity than sexual abstinence.

What your sister is passing through is what my eldest sister went through as well.

Hers is even 20 years of marriage before she finally accepted to do IVF because she equally saw it as a sin hitherto.

One thing I noticed about overly religious people is that they realize the world has left them behind so late which makes them bitter and desperate and at the end of the day commit offenses more criminal than what they have been avoiding and condemning all the years.

It's really a pathetic situation, reason I have refused to be religious.

In summary, extremely religious people defy logic and common sense because to them, everything has religious undertone and they must wait for everything to fall in place by divine ordination.

By the time they come to terms with reality, years have gone very far.

Our eldest sister's first son is less than a year, our second sister's first child is in SS1!

Again, I wonder why extremely religious people are unlucky with marriage and life generally. If it's not inability to conceive, it is extreme poverty.

God help man.

So we should start having premarital sex??..
What about those who ruined their lives as a result of premarital sex.
Op u better get sense,before sense get you oh.

@ OP, U no get talk for mouth...

galantjoe:


80 out of 100 people that practice no sex before marriage are impotent and infertile. About 10 of remaining 20 people are frigid by nature

I always remember what Machiavelli said in his popular book of strategy The Prince
"Any man who tries to be good all the time is bound to come to ruin among the great number who are not good."

Did you carry out this research or you read an article about a research carried out to arrive at this stats.


I wonder what the link between celibacy and fertility is.

As for the OP do you think if she had sex before marriage she would have had a child by now because I dont get your logic.