SecretSpy666:
Greetings Nairalanders,
I want to seek for you peoples opinions regarding my family challenges.

I'm from a broken home. My parents divorced when I was a child of two years. I'm the only child from their union. My father and mother abandoned me and remarried to other spouse each. I passed through hell growing up with relatives who insulted me with all kinds of names and I was treated like a slave to their own children.

Because of public outcry about my dehumanizing treatment, my father came to village and took me to the city. It was from fry pan to fire experience as my father's new wife was maltreating me. At a point, my father asked me to leave his house that since my arrival, he don't have peace with his wife.

I packed to the house of a relative and work in a block industry to help myself. Most times, I slept in a CAC church close to the relative house as the two-room apartment is not enough for his family. My mother never care if I was alive. She never call me nor reply to letter I sent through someone to her. I continued working in the block industry and started a part time programme. I completed the part time programme and did my NYSC and master degree. I got a job with University of Ado Ekiti with the help of a course mate, managing myself now and surprisingly my mother and father started calling me often.

Both of them have 6 children each with their respective second spouse. Mother want his son to come and live with me, I refused and my father too have been requesting for financial assistance which I also refused. I don't want to have anything to do with both of them. My father's daughter recently called me to help her with school fees, I bluntly told her to ask her mother what she did to me and caught the call. Since then, she never call.

I'm alone and have just two friends. I don't have family. All of them calling now are just looking for what to get from me, not that they care about me. My mother never call me once to ask about my welfare even when I sent my phone number to her through her relative. I wrote WAEC, completed degree course before she started calling me and it is only to request for one thing or other. I'm planning to get married without telling them and build a separate family.

Olatoman:
I read a bit of replies to this, and what I think I should point out briefly is this, they are not your Parents. Parents are essentially caregivers of their offsprings. This are simply your biological father, and mother. You were treated like the bad product of a bad union, with no one wanting a reminder of that union, and in their hindsight, failed to account for the future.

I think you should offer forgiveness, if you want to, as theirs healing from that, but offer naught companionship to them, aye?

They also have offsprings from their respective unions, so why must they single-handed focus on you, wanting you to provide for them, not caring how you fairing and eve knowing the means to do so?

You can at your discretion, send whatever you want to them once in a while, but I do not think it will be healthy for you (mentally and all), to succumb to their pressure, as that pressure will not just be upon you, but on the family you are likely to raise later in the future.

For your step siblings, I think you need to make them acknowledge who you are first of all, and maybe understand the gravity of what your parents did, but also, might be necessary to have a form of relationship with them, cordial enough to start with.

This is not a period of demands upon you, but a period of sobriety and acknowledgment of wrong doing to you.

Oizee:
eyya, may God console you and your Mum continue to rest in peace, when I said he should forgive, people really misinterpreted it.
The luv can't be there again especially if you remember ur mom that didn't enjoy d fruit of her labour. I will forgive him, but when I'm eating Chicken, they will be eating starch and ponmo bcuz they don't deserve Rice and chicken. The pain is much but guy should just forgive.
I myself have someone I don't get along with, my maternal Uncle, my late Mum trained him and he was doing as if he was appreciating then, he later got married and life was ok, we lost my Mum.
Initially we were d one calling as per our Uncle not to ask of anything from him. He didn't reciprocate the same, he thought maybe my younger ones might be begging him for some stuff, I was lucky cuz I was working and married, so I seek for my hubby's consent if our last born could stay with us and he said no wahala. D boy finished sec school, and gained admission in Unillorin and finished school, my uncle wasn't aware.
He couldn't even pretend at all to call for once.
My little bro mark waec and neco exams, he went to submit papers in Lokoja and saw my Uncle in waec office, that was how he knew d boy is even a graduate. One thing in my life is this, if I discovered I don't matter to u, I will distance from u and keep my pain, failure and success all to myself. Now he's d one telling people to beg us.
He told someone one that he's own sister's Son snubbed him when they met somewhere. U see I have completely put a gap between us forever, but if na fada, u have to forgive but d luv can't be there again. People who were never in your shoes will be reminding u he's ur fada no matter what.

mufutau55:
Abandon all of them too.

AngelicBeing:
Hian, Lol, Hajj don vex

Seventy7kings:
Hmmm...
Strange story. I don't know what to say

Sunnimuslim:
This is almost related to what Eminem went through. He also neglected his mum when he became successful but he still help out his step siblings from their abusive mother.

SecretSpy666:

The got to know of where I'm working. I don't know who told them. They arranged with someone I was relating with to bring them to my house. When I got Intel about it. Warned the person not to bring anyone to my house and dissociated with the person. Now they are saying I'm rich and don't want to help anyone but I don't care.

SecretSpy666:
Greetings Nairalanders,
I want to seek for you peoples opinions regarding my family challenges.

I'm from a broken home. My parents divorced when I was a child of two years. I'm the only child from their union. My father and mother abandoned me and remarried to other spouse each. I passed through hell growing up with relatives who insulted me with all kinds of names and I was treated like a slave to their own children.

Because of public outcry about my dehumanizing treatment, my father came to village and took me to the city. It was from fry pan to fire experience as my father's new wife was maltreating me. At a point, my father asked me to leave his house that since my arrival, he don't have peace with his wife.

I packed to the house of a relative and work in a block industry to help myself. Most times, I slept in a CAC church close to the relative house as the two-room apartment is not enough for his family. My mother never care if I was alive. She never call me nor reply to letter I sent through someone to her. I continued working in the block industry and started a part time programme. I completed the part time programme and did my NYSC and master degree. I got a job with University of Ado Ekiti with the help of a course mate, managing myself now and surprisingly my mother and father started calling me often.

Both of them have 6 children each with their respective second spouse. Mother want his son to come and live with me, I refused and my father too have been requesting for financial assistance which I also refused. I don't want to have anything to do with both of them. My father's daughter recently called me to help her with school fees, I bluntly told her to ask her mother what she did to me and caught the call. Since then, she never call.

I'm alone and have just two friends. I don't have family. All of them calling now are just looking for what to get from me, not that they care about me. My mother never call me once to ask about my welfare even when I sent my phone number to her through her relative. I wrote WAEC, completed degree course before she started calling me and it is only to request for one thing or other. I'm planning to get married without telling them and build a separate family.

BluntNigerian:
This one would be difficult ooo..
You don't marry alone naa..
You must go with “family”.
So, prepare your mind now, and sort out which and which people you would use as your “Family”.

Oluchia:
Jeez! This story day pain me. What kind of parents are this?? I cannot ask you to forgive them o because I'm not sure I will be able to do same if I were in your shoes. Please just follow your heart and do what will give you peace of mind. That's all I can say.

mariahAngel:

Have they at least asked for your forgiveness?