I loved my hubby so much b4 and after we got married and he also did. But all of a sudden he changed after 2 years dat was after our first kid. He started acting dramas for me,a very little thing we used 2 talk over b4 is now a big case. I dnt know what went wrong wit him for d fact dat we have kid together i dnt want 2 quit i stil moved on and start enduring. Then he starts d habbit of beating me without thinking of our love . The most painful one was when i was pregnant, during my early stage dat i was very sick and weak my husband beats me dat i even taught it was over cos i ended up in an hospital. How many would i discus. He liars 2 me alot, he mess around, he even slept wit my child home lesson teacher in my living room.I'm seriously tired of him. He calls me names he even told his girlfrnd he regret marrying me, u'll wonder how i knew, d girl got my number and calling me names via texting can u imagine. What should i do cos i'm going nut rigth now after 5yrs of marriage dose dat every is over. Please advice me this is really serious. Thanks.

awwwwwww

ayanah:

I loved my hubby so much b4 and after we got married and he also did. But all of a sudden he changed after 2 years dat was after our first kid. He started acting dramas for me,a very little thing we used 2 talk over b4 is now a big case. I dnt know what went wrong wit him for d fact dat we have kid together i dnt want 2 quit i stil moved on and start enduring. Then he starts d habbit of beating me without thinking of our love . The most painful one was when i was pregnant, during my early stage dat i was very sick and weak my husband beats me dat i even taught it was over cos i ended up in an hospital. How many would i discus. He liars 2 me alot, he mess around, he even slept wit my child home lesson teacher in my living room.I'm seriously tired of him. He calls me names he even told his girlfrnd he regret marrying me, u'll wonder how i knew, d girl got my number and calling me names via texting can u imagine. What should i do cos i'm going nut rigth now after 5yrs of marriage dose dat every is over. Please advice me this is really serious. Thanks.

Chaircover, can give you advice on how to continue to be a submissive and subservient wife. You should stay with him and work on your marriage, there is no life without a man.

The situation can be reversed with proper planning, the grass in not always greener at the other side.

obowunmi:


Chaircover, can give you advice on how to continue to be a submissive and subservient wife. You should stay with him and work on your marriage, there is no life without a man.

Abeg leave my CC, wetin you mean. After some days the same woman will come and sing praises and say patience and perseverance is d key.
Poster, stay, maange, cook better food, be humble , give him what he wants, if he still beats you hard luck.

lmao @ aisha

Don't you have family? does he not have relatives? report him jare and let your families intervene before he kiss you in the house.

aisha2:

Abeg leave my CC, wetin you mean. After some days the same woman will come and sing praises and say patience and perseverance is d key.
Poster, stay, maange, cook better food, be humble , give him what he wants, if he still beats you hard luck.

I think some of you folks are being unfair to CC. I have read a few of her posts and she never advocated for a woman to be a dummy in a relationship. I believe, she even said at one point that most relationships can be salvaged when there is no violence in them. I tend to share her point of view most times. The fact that they differ from yours does not mean that she is right or wrong. It only gives a different perspective; there are at least two sides to every story. It's a forum and we all share experiences and ideas. What works for one relationship may not work for another. She's obviously sharing what works in her marriage and she seems to be in a very happy relationship; something alot of people cannot boast of. So making fun of her views is quite immature; I must say and it tells alot about an individual who cannot discuss issues without belittling the other. We can all be matured and agree to disagree. In the end, whoever needs help will have to apply wisdom to whatever advice he/she gets from third parties.

For this lady, I'd advice you to move on. Your hubby has since moved on.

Oh lawd, some women sha!!!!!

@poster
As much as you think that being married or having children for this monster is a reason to endure all this craziness.
The man has absolutely NO respect for you or this marriage, what more do you want? Is being "a wife" such a big (and important) deal for you?!

Just stay there until he brings his foul mouth gf to come live with you so SHE can assist and help him in beating the hell out of you.
Ps: if you are a sane adult then you deserve it all, nonsense!

Delta007:

I think some of you folks are being unfair to CC. I have read a few of her posts and she never advocated for a woman to be a dummy in a relationship. I believe, she even said at one point that most relationships can be salvaged when there is no violence in them. I tend to share her point of view most times. The fact that they differ from yours does not mean that she is right or wrong. It only gives a different perspective; there are at least two sides to every story. It's a forum and we all share experiences and ideas. What works for one relationship may not work for another. She's obviously sharing what works in her marriage and she seems to be in a very happy relationship; something alot of people cannot boast of. So making fun of her views is quite immature; I must say and it tells alot about an individual who cannot discuss issues without belittling the other. We can all be matured and agree to disagree. In the end, whoever needs help will have to apply wisdom to whatever advice he/she gets from third parties.

For this lady, I'd advice you to move on. Your hubby has since moved on.

I think that your post is very uncalled for, unnecessary, and childish ---- Aisha has not share a right or wrong notion in her post re: CC, so why reach such a conclusion. I think you harbor ill will.

ayanah:

I loved my hubby so much b4 and after we got married and he also did. But all of a sudden he changed after 2 years dat was after our first kid. He started acting dramas for me,a very little thing we used 2 talk over b4 is now a big case. I dnt know what went wrong wit him for d fact dat we have kid together i dnt want 2 quit i stil moved on and start enduring. Then he starts d habbit of beating me without thinking of our love . The most painful one was when i was pregnant, during my early stage dat i was very sick and weak my husband beats me dat i even taught it was over cos i ended up in an hospital. How many would i discus. He liars 2 me alot, he mess around, he even slept wit my child home lesson teacher in my living room.I'm seriously tired of him. He calls me names he even told his girlfrnd he regret marrying me, u'll wonder how i knew, d girl got my number and calling me names via texting can u imagine. What should i do cos i'm going nut rigth now after 5yrs of marriage dose dat every is over. Please advice me this is really serious. Thanks.

So your hubby just started doing all these because you had a kid for him? I believe there are some people that are making stories up in this forum. Every other day, it's always one story of one man beating his wife,

Genius100:

So your hubby just started doing all these because you had a kid for him? I believe there are some people that are making stories up in this forum. Every other day, it's always one story of one man beating his wife,

I agree and some jobleess entities will analyze the fake story die.

Is this another recycled and refurbished post and poster?
OP,If u are for real and all what u posted is true,what are u still doing with the man?Is the s-ex or shopping irresistible?
Save ur head,preserve ur life. . .the best gift a woman wud give herself and child is staying alive against all odds to nurtue her child.

@Genius100, it was after we had a kid dat it all started and not all times he could be nice sometimes. @obowunmi, how i wish it was a fake story but unfurtunatly for me is real. All i need is an advice 2 get me out of this mess. @ ifyalwayz, forget sex n morning those are not my problem. My greatest problem is how to end this so calld marriage, cos i think i lack d courage 2 quit. I'm afraid of what family and frnds might say if i quit. I'v been keeping all dis 2 myself cos i dnt want people 2 see him as a bad person cos he is so nice 2 all my family members. Whenever i told him i'm leaving him, he will start begging me not 2 go. I dnt know what 2 do i'm confused.

@ poster. While I do not advocate dovorce or seperation, I suggest you move out of the house for a while so as to get some "fresh air". Go stay with a relative or friend or hire a short-term accomodation (if you can afford it). You should consider your safety first and don`t hesitate to tell your parents and his as well. If need be, make an entry at the nearest police station. Better the whole world know how he`s treating you than keeping mute and God forbid you`re not around to tell your own side of the story.

Like they say in my place, "na play, na play laba-laba take dey enter bush". He could hit you in the wrong place and the story will change. Pls madam, na who dey life dey fit talk.

As for his misdeeds, he`ll get past it and realise how foolish he has been. Becos, "the cane wey dem take flog 1st wife dey corner dey wait for the 2nd, 3rd, 4th . . . . . . . . "

Keep him in your prayers and my sincere advice, NEVER consider DIVORCE or SEPERATION. God will see your through. Amen

ayanah:

@Genius100, it was after we had a kid dat it all started and not all times he could be nice sometimes. @obowunmi, how i wish it was a fake story but unfurtunatly for me is real. All i need is an advice 2 get me out of this mess. @ ifyalwayz, forget sex n morning those are not my problem. My greatest problem is how to end this so calld marriage, cos i think i lack d courage 2 quit. I'm afraid of what  family and frnds might say if i quit. I'v been keeping all dis 2 myself cos i dnt want people 2 see him as a bad person cos he is so nice 2 all my family members. Whenever i told him i'm leaving him, he will start begging me not 2 go. I dnt know what 2 do i'm confused.     

Nothing to tell or advice you.
The key and solution lies with you,Please utilize it.Hear yourself ooo
You want to end this marriage but you lack the guts
You are afraid of what family and friends wud say or do.
You don't want people to see him as a bad person,he is nice.
He beats u mercilessly and he begs you to stay.

Search and tell urself the truth. . .

Stay and endure the beatings or stay and learn how to defend urself/fight back.
Get away for sometime,involve family and see if they wud be able to talk sense into his head.

obowunmi:


Chaircover, can give you advice on how to continue to be a submissive and subservient wife. You should stay with him and work on your marriage, there is no life without a man.

Oya, Mrs Chaircover. You are expected to report here as soon as possible for a very urgent counseling huh?.

Na wa for you o

@ Poster

Please can you answer just one question?

You are married 5 years. Had a kid after 2 years and your kid has a lesson teacher

@Poster.

First, I must sympathize with you on this ugly occurrence you’re experiencing in your family; you should know that marriage isn’t a bed of roses as most people think.

But I before I begin, I like to refer you to Sir Isaac Newton 3rd law of motion (that is of course if studied a science related course) which states that “To every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction”.

This simply means that you must have taken an action and what you’re experiencing from your husband is his equal and opposite reaction.

I would like you to ask yourself these questions.

1. Have you been disobedient to him in any way?

2. Do you still appear romantic to him as you were before you got married?

3. Are you the nagging type?

4. During quarrels do you respect him and your marriage and keep quiet or does your voice surpass his voice hence your beating as you stated in your post?

5. Do you have bed talks with him and apologize when you feel you’ve offended him?

6. Have you asked yourself led to his change of attitude over night?

7. Have you taken the matter to God in prayer?

I would suggest that you look into these questions and I pray that you would find a solution.

Goodluck.

CrazyMan:

@Poster.

First, I must sympathize with you on this ugly occurrence you’re experiencing in your family; you should know that marriage isn’t a bed of roses as most people think.

But I before I begin, I like to refer you to Sir Isaac Newton 3rd law of motion (that is of course if studied a science related course) which states that “To every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction”.

This simply means that you must have taken an action and what you’re experiencing from your husband is his equal and opposite reaction.

I would like you to ask yourself these questions.

1. Have you been disobedient to him in any way?

2. Do you still appear romantic to him as you were before you got married?

3. Are you the nagging type?

4. During quarrels do you respect him and your marriage and keep quiet or does your voice surpass his voice hence your beating as you stated in your post?

5. Do you have bed talks with him and apologize when you feel you’ve offended him?

6. Have you asked yourself led to his change of attitude over night?

7. Have you taken the matter to God in prayer?

I would suggest that you look into these questions and I pray that you would find a solution.

Goodluck.

Reaction ko, Inaction ni

mutter:

@ Poster

Please can you answer just one question?

You are married 5 years. Had a kid after 2 years and your kid has a lesson teacher

Shebi I tell una say this story na lie,

Abeg maq una free Chaircover abeg.She's one of the level headed members on this forum,cut her some slack k

mutter:

@ Poster

Please can you answer just one question?

You are married 5 years. Had a kid after 2 years and your kid has a lesson teacher

Siddon dia oh Nimota, you think Naija is like Europe where kids don't start learning to solve basic 1+1 till age 5 and start learning to spell till age 7

You can't compare curriculum oh, Nigerian kids aged 3 would have started learning to add up four figure digits and using long division and started their multiplication tables and started honing their writing and reading skills, abeg Naija children nor be olodos like their counterparts biko wey go dey do colour-it-in, singing twinkle twinkle little star, using face paints, play dough, and having naptime in the middle of class and drinking juice in their pampers, awon atole

^^^ True, that is one part of obodo oyibo I so dislike. In naija kids start kindy at a very young age. I finished my high school @ the age of 15,

obowunmi:

I think that your post is very uncalled for, unnecessary, and childish ---- Aisha has not share a right or wrong notion in her post re: CC, so why reach such a conclusion. I think you harbor ill will.

No I think Delta007 mistakenly quoted Aisha2, this is what is totally incalled for:

obowunmi:


Chaircover, can give you advice on how to continue to be a submissive and subservient wife. You should stay with him and work on your marriage, there is no life without a man.

very very unnecessary and childish and all what Delta007 wrote apply to this post.

jennykadry:

^^^ True, that is one part of obodo oyibo I so dislike. In naija kids start kindy at a very young age. I finished my high school @ the age of 15,

Interesting, can I have your full resume pls,

jennykadry:

^^^ True, that is one part of obodo oyibo I so dislike. In naija kids start kindy at a very young age. I finished my high school @ the age of 15,

Nor mind them, na soso squiggling my pickin still dey do aged 4, dem never teach them how to write common 1,2,3 or count sef. Dem go talk say Naija style of learning na child abuse, say all they need to help their brain develop now is "play", can you imagine such arrant nonsense

I told his School to stop putting those junk in his school bag to bring home to Mummy, the whole place already looks like a crime scene following a burglary, so I don't need more panti to litter the place The Teacher would be like look at this one he made, can't you make out the circle or wave shape" and i'd say no, abeg help me pack them and store them in School till the end of the term, I will come and get it then to forward to his grandma, na them dey like all those junks wey dem go hang for wall, fridge, Office, etc

^^lol and they come home with one stupid painting ,mine drew one terribly-looking-pink-faced witch and underneath the drawing was written "My beautiful mummy" when the teacher showed me the drawing na so I talk for my mind "Your father" nansense, you had to disfigure the pretty face oam4jenny dies for.

OAM4J:

Interesting, can I have your full resume pls,

Yes in bed

@ OAM4J, u smell like a slowpoke.

jennykadry:

Yes in bed

I must say the Lord's prayer everyday from now on. . .

Our father, who art in heaven, am not asking for bread, just don't lead me into temptation and deliver me from Jenny's advances. Amen.