Good evening Nairalanders. I am sorry to bother you. I opened this account newly just to seek for your advice as my heart is too heavy now. Me and my boyfriend have been dating since November 2018. We both love each other. He is working and I work too. We do not stay in same place but I visit him every weekend. Recently I found out that he is a little withdrawn from me with his attitude. He rarely pick my calls and rarely call as before. Infact our communication level has dropped. When ever I ask, he gives this excuse of his busy schedule. I have never caught him cheating before and he has not cheated on me either. 3days ago, I received the most heartbreaking call of my life when my friend told me that my boyfriend just engaged someone. I thought she was joking until I saw pictures of my supposed boyfriend on his Instagram page engaging a girl. I have been down and devastated ever since.
This is someone I gave my all to. Someone I supported financially to open a side business. Someone whose siblings I assisted sometimes. Call me names , insult me, because I know I deserve it, but this is someone that made me carried out abortion 2times. How do go about this because I feel really heartbroken as I type. I m losing focus right now even in office.
Please I need your Advice here.
Sorry for my English

Noted

If truly he engaged someone else, expunge him from your heart / mind and move on

these day many people tend to think that their in a relationship without knowing their partner's mind

Chai
Personally I feel sorry for you for everything that has happened to you. Most times before something like this happen, there is always a warning sign which you didn't pay attention to. However, I will only advice you to move on with your life. This is an advice to everyone. There is always a warning sign.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R0dyMa7jawE

Please move on,thats life

Girl move on!
Do all the crying and regrets, it ain't easy, but move on once you're done crying...the best revenge is living your best life.....
We see this everyday...
You give Someone your all and they wake up one morning and start acting up because they met a new person....be strong Okay!

Jake19:
Good evening Nairalanders. I am sorry to bother you. I opened this account newly just to seek for your advice as my heart is too heavy now. Me and my boyfriend have been dating since November 2018. We both love each other. He is working and I work too. We do not stay in same place but I visit him every weekend. Recently I found out that he is a little withdrawn from me with his attitude. He rarely pick my calls and rarely call as before. Infact our communication level has dropped. When ever I ask, he gives this excuse of his busy schedule. I have never caught him cheating before and he has not cheated on me either. 3days ago, I received the most heartbreaking call of my life when my friend told me that my boyfriend just engaged someone. I thought she was joking until I saw pictures of my supposed boyfriend on his Instagram page engaging a girl. I have been down and devastated ever since.
This is someone I gave my all to. Someone I supported financially to open a side business. Someone whose siblings I assisted sometimes. Call me names , insult me, because I know I deserve it, but this is someone that made me carried out abortion 2times. How do go about this because I feel really heartbroken as I type. I m losing focus right now even in office.
Please I need your Advice here.
Sorry for my English

Move on my dear,next relationship you will have, don't give your Puna to the man anyhow,you were a little bit careless in this past one,why ? U had one abortion and you allowed yourself to be used the second time, move on you deserve better

Move on Biko
B4 your own go pass you

Hmm,

Go for hiv and hepatitis test first

Then I will know what to say.

Anyway, he had several choices, he had to pick one. Why did you not define what you were doing all these while?

Did he promise marriage to you before now?
Anyway, women should get reliable definition of their relationship early so as not to waste much time on the wrong relationship.

vikkimimi:
Girl move on!
Do all the crying and regrets, it ain't easy, but move on once you're done crying...the best revenge is living your best life.....
We see this everyday...
You give Someone your all and they wake up one morning and start acting up because they met a new person....be strong Okay!

Thank you maam
I don't know how to confront him. He is owing me significant amount of money I borrowed him early this year. I am very confused as I speak.

Jake19:


Thank you maam
I don't know how to confront him. He is owing me significant amount of money I borrowed him early this year. I am very confused as I speak.

Do you have any proof that he owes you, like debit alert or something like a bank statement in case he tries to deny it.
Involve a third party, a big brother, a kind hearted guy that knows what's up or even a military personnel if you have any at your disposal...set up a meeting with everyone present and request for your money.
Don't leave it , let it be that you only lost your time and not money too.

Earthstorms:
Hmm,

Go for hiv and hepatitis test first

Then I will know what to say.

Anyway, he had several choices, he had to pick one. Why did you not define what you were doing all these while?

Did he promise marriage to you before now?
Anyway, women should get reliable definition of their relationship early so as not to waste much time on the wrong relationship.

Well, our relationship was defined and we seem to be planning towards ending our lives together. He made me believe he was so much into me.

vikkimimi:


Do you have any proof that he owes you, like debit alert or something like a bank statement in case he tries to deny it.
Involve a third party, a big brother, a kind hearted guy that knows what's up or even a military personnel if you have any at your disposal...set up a meeting with everyone present and request for your money.
Don't leave it , let it be that you only lost your time and not money too.

I don't know if I still have the debit alert details. I will check on it. I sincerely appreciate this

Jake19:


I don't know if I still have the debit alert details. I will check on it. I sincerely appreciate this

You're welcome..if you don't...try checking with your bank if you can get an account statement....and also try saving the chats that led to the lending of the money...

Jake19:
Good evening Nairalanders. I am sorry to bother you. I opened this account newly just to seek for your advice as my heart is too heavy now. Me and my boyfriend have been dating since November 2018. We both love each other. He is working and I work too. We do not stay in same place but I visit him every weekend. Recently I found out that he is a little withdrawn from me with his attitude. He rarely pick my calls and rarely call as before. Infact our communication level has dropped. When ever I ask, he gives this excuse of his busy schedule. I have never caught him cheating before and he has not cheated on me either. 3days ago, I received the most heartbreaking call of my life when my friend told me that my boyfriend just engaged someone. I thought she was joking until I saw pictures of my supposed boyfriend on his Instagram page engaging a girl. I have been down and devastated ever since.
This is someone I gave my all to. Someone I supported financially to open a side business. Someone whose siblings I assisted sometimes. Call me names , insult me, because I know I deserve it, but this is someone that made me carried out abortion 2times. How do go about this because I feel really heartbroken as I type. I m losing focus right now even in office.
Please I need your Advice here.
Sorry for my English

I'm sorry about your plight ma'am. But una no dey ever fall for good guys. I hope you find solace real quick. I no want come see your story for front page: girl drinks sniper after finding out her bf who she's committed multiple abortions for just wedded his real heart throb. Pele..you've been the side chick for two years. Other bitches won't learn from this.

Jake19:


Well, our relationship was defined and we seem to be planning towards ending our lives together. He made me believe he was so much into me.

Sorry about everything.

Many things could have caused the guy to pick a new girl.

He could just be a player and wanted a new girl
He could have genuinely lost interest in you
It is possible he met someone he could not resist.
He might even want to keep both of you, after all he has not called you to end the relationship.

Just get hold of yourself and talk to him to know his plans. There must be a reason for his actions.

Whatever reason he gives, dry your tears and move on. Make plans on how to recover the loan you gave to him.

Sorry you don't have plans for your life. Invest in your children and not relationship and don't spend your hard earn money on relationship because it will end in tears.

My dear such is life, brace yourself, cry out everything and move on with your life.

I am sincerely not happy to hear this as I so much detest betrayal.

SarutobiEky:
I'm sorry about your plight ma'am. But una no dey ever fall for good guys. I hope you find solace real quick. I no want come see your story for front page: girl drinks sniper after finding out her bf who she's committed multiple abortions for just wedded his real heart throb. Pele..you've been the side chick for two years. Other bitches won't learn from this.

Is it really about falling for the good guys? Are good guys ultimately "good" from head to toe? Do they not have negative qualities?

And by the way, I'm curious, what defines a good guy?

Because I have noticed that when threads about relationships come up on this forum, you see guys constantly admitting they have ghosted one babe like that without notice or warning. A supposedly good guy who is in a longterm relationship confidently says this. And they make it sound so okay that they get hailed for it thus prompting other niggas to assume this action of ghosting someone is acceptable.

Only very few people have the balls to break up with someone clean and square, good guy or not.


I will never understand why human beings are such cowards tbh.

I really understand how you feel,it will be very hard to move on but you have to be strong.Nobody is to be trusted.God will give you your own man.Y do nice girls always end up in a wrong hand? I can feel your pains.Sobs

Jake19:


Thank you maam
I don't know how to confront him. He is owing me significant amount of money I borrowed him early this year. I am very confused as I speak.

get your money back

eejo:
Sorry you don't have plans for your life. Invest in your children and not relationship and don't spend your hard earn money on relationship because it will end in tears.

if she does not support him,u will say girls are stingy

So sad. Just move on dear. It is not all Relationship that leads to marriage. Goodluck

Jake19:


We both love each other.

I have never caught him cheating before and he has not cheated on me either.

It cut both ways... babes do the same to guys and guys to babes. Those who avoid such heartbreaks are those who pay attention or learn from experience. This is your experience... did you look in the mirror to reflect on the red flags you missed? If not... you are likely to be in this situation again.

Why... after saying all that you said... would you say we both love each other?.... and be swearing that he never cheated on you? Don't you think he had a relationship going with his fiancee while he pretended to be with you?
I'm almost sure his relationship with you was all about the money. Both of you work... you finance his side hustle... extra money for him... yet you support his family.... and he is owing you. BREAKING NEWS... he has no intention. of repaying you any money. You either get it back thru the court... or as Vikkimimi advised... basically by force.

You cannot tie a man down with either money nor pregnancy. Get your money back... by any means necessary ... learn from the mistakes you made....and move on with your life.

Jake19:
Good evening of my supposed boyfriend on his Instagram page engaging a girl. I have been down and devastated ever since.
This is someone I gave my all to. Someone I supported financially to open a side business. Someone whose siblings I assisted sometimes. Call me names , insult me, because I know I deserve it, but this is someone that made me carried out abortion 2times. How do go about this because I feel really heartbroken as I type. I m losing focus right now even in office.
Please I need your Advice here.
Sorry for my English

sorry about your experience. such is life,

the hardest part is moving on. you have to let me him go, but make sure you don't move on without giving him a dose of the evil he has done to u

Hmmm ...wahala be like bicycle aswr...babe it is hard but try to move on..forget about him and move on though it will be very hard..take all d tins u did 4 him as charity amd forget about dem..d God dat gave u all thosr will bless u with more..U might be thinking about revenge but forget it because u will only hurt yourself at d end
later people will ask y ladies are stingy and men are becoming stingy

I don't even know what to say.

Just move on love, cry if you have to. But, don't cry too much because he's not worth it. Don't be surprised God just saved you from making a very big mistake.

I'll advice you on what works for me. Prayer. I've been able to overcome so many problems through prayer. Before and after work, pray to God for the strength to move past this situation.

Whenever you feel like thinking about him, kneel down and pray.

Stay away from social media for now and anything relationship. It'll help you heal faster.

Earthstorms:
Hmm,

Go for hiv and hepatitis test first

Then I will know what to say.

Anyway, he had several choices, he had to pick one. Why did you not define what you were doing all these while?

Did he promise marriage to you before now?
Anyway, women should get reliable definition of their relationship early so as not to waste much time on the wrong relationship.

So it's now the woman's fault?

Jake19:
Good evening Nairalanders. I am sorry to bother you. I opened this account newly just to seek for your advice as my heart is too heavy now. Me and my boyfriend have been dating since November 2018. We both love each other. He is working and I work too. We do not stay in same place but I visit him every weekend. Recently I found out that he is a little withdrawn from me with his attitude. He rarely pick my calls and rarely call as before. Infact our communication level has dropped. When ever I ask, he gives this excuse of his busy schedule. I have never caught him cheating before and he has not cheated on me either. 3days ago, I received the most heartbreaking call of my life when my friend told me that my boyfriend just engaged someone. I thought she was joking until I saw pictures of my supposed boyfriend on his Instagram page engaging a girl. I have been down and devastated ever since.
This is someone I gave my all to. Someone I supported financially to open a side business. Someone whose siblings I assisted sometimes. Call me names , insult me, because I know I deserve it, but this is someone that made me carried out abortion 2times. How do go about this because I feel really heartbroken as I type. I m losing focus right now even in office.
Please I need your Advice here.
Sorry for my English

chai!
you fall my hand!


when you should be giving Thanksgiving in Church this Wednesday to the Lord Almighty!
That Almighty God has removed time wasters and space booker's out of your life.

Shortyy:

So it's now the woman's fault?

Sweety, women are mostly on the receiving end of things like these.

It is better if they are more careful of who they allow into their heart and for how long they stay in a relationship without a marriage proposal.

Jake19:


Thank you maam
I don't know how to confront him. He is owing me significant amount of money I borrowed him early this year. I am very confused as I speak.

how!
for you health and sanity better forget this money o