@michelin

EHen naaaa , people like inkerd are the main reason why some parents refuse to send their kids to obodo oyibo before the westernized world chop the rest of their brains off. Someone has come here for help clearly stating that she does not want to be a lebian anymore and one fellow woman is busy telling her to embrace her sexuality. So people are now allowed to embrace their sexuality if they find themselves sexually attracted to animals or infants or little babies? What a waste of space 

jennykadry:

@michelin

EHen naaaa , people like inkerd are the main reason why some parents refuse to send their kids to obodo oyibo before the westernized world chop the rest of their brains off. Someone has come here for help clearly stating that she does not want to be a lebian anymore and one fellow woman is busy telling her to embrace her sexuality. So people are now allowed to embrace their sexuality if they find themselves sexually attracted to animals or infants or little babies? What a waste of space 

Word!

@ JK,
na true u talk o Jenny.

@ MacO,
pls keep up the good work and spreading the word.

@ Ink-N
Pls remember this passage of the bible: shall we continue in sin that grace may abound? God forbid!
Say it with me: God forbid!

@Oshioluv, my dia I feel 4 u. 2 bad ur ordeal drove u n2 d arms of your sister. Am happy u r takin a stand against wat u wia. U cant change your past bt u can determine wat your present & future will b. Make God your confidant & best friend ( cos it will only take His grace 2 see u tru), talk 2 an elderly person whom u can TRUST & who will counsel & pray wit u, learn 2 4give & move on ( its hard bt it can b done ) cos if u dont deal wit your past, u cant handle your future. Decide within urself dat u will leave your past life ( I'v seen Lesbians dat 4 go wat dey wia so u can do it) & neva 4get dat u r beautifully & wonderfully made.

MRbrownJAY:

The gal SAYS she is a lesbian, she SAYS she doesn't want to be one any longer, she SAYS she is dating a guy that doesn't know she is a lesbian (cover up relationship). how much more HINTS do you need to understand that this gal is a lesbian and ashamed of her feelings due to peer pressure?!
The fact that you don't see gays/ lesbians in 9ja doesn't mean they aint there, they are simply living double live, on the DL as its known.

So MRbrownJAY wat EXACTLY is ur advice? & I didnt see wia she said she is ashamed due 2 peer pressure ( it can b any reason). She said she is a lesbian in a r/ship wit a guy & 4 d past one yr has stayed off women & dat she wants 2 change bt nids advice on how 2 go about dat change. Even if its due 2 peer pressure like u said ( mayb she told u?) d least u can do is 2 offer advice instead of bashing her. No one is a saint least of all u so dnt sound like she is nt worth a spit! U dont know wat she is goin tru so lay off d insults

it is quite sad what happened to you but believe me it is a lot more common than many nigerians would care to admit.
whether that is what has made you lesbian/bisexual is debatable. generally there is a certain mindset that many victims of sexual abuse have. this mindset operates at a very deep subconcious level and so is not one you can reason away with logic. it is almost like a virus on a computer.
a very common idea in this situation is that you were somehow to blame,that you are a bad person and your subconsciousness mind would work very hard to confirm this idea.
much of this is theoretical and theories are not always true but the mind (subconscious part) has a way of repeating patterns. kind of like a scratched cd. so you might see some very young ladies who prefer to date guys twice their ages and money has nothing to do with it ditto for some men. the theory is this may be a result of that gender of parent being absent. absent is  a psychological concept here.they may never have been physically separated. on the other hand when that parent is actually absent there may be no difficulties if there are appropriate role model substitutes. it is quite complex
another theory has to do with why women choose to be with men who beat them or abuse them in preference to nice guys. again ditto for men. i think a recent interview by the singer rihanna is quite revealing.
some people accept themselves that ;that is the way they are and get on with their lives. if you are not satisfied with the way things are you need to create an alternative  vivid image in your mind what you want to see in your life. it might be helpful for you to find somebody to confide it but it is quite tricky if the person is not professional. a clergy person normally would have been ideal but these days there are too many bad eggs. it is necessary to get reassurance that what happened was evil and wrong but not your fault and you are as good as everyone else. ultimately you must believe this in your core to move on,
best wishes

@ aribisala0

That was the best possible advice, thanks for the post.
Peace

@poster

I am so sorry, and I do know how u feel, it's going to take a while for you to work all of this out in your mind, and I am not sure there is any particular method that is guaranteed to help, you just have to try whatever u can.  Please do accept aribisala0's advice, it is the most straight-forward so far.  Take good care of yourself.
Peace

oshioluv: Hi, am new here and i need ur advice.
I was molested wen i was 6 by aunts husband 2geda wit my my younger sis. We were treatend not 2 talk 2 our parents abt it. But told our parents afta sometime. My family been very strict we were very secretive 4rm very tender age. Since den we bcam lesbian but no one knws abt it.
Now we are in diff universities. Though av a bf bt dosnt knw am a les. And av able 2 do without d les thing 4 more dan a year nw. Dnt wanna b a les anymore,working 2ward it if i can. But seriously am worried abt my sis cos i dnw want her 2 continue with it and we no longer talk abt our les life anymore.
Pls i'll truly appreciate ur advice tanx.

@ jenny,9ice 1 there....@Op,do everythin possible to help ur self and ur sis..
go closer to JESUS CHRIST..all the best