kosi2018:
my dear I'm not creating any enmity, that is why I didn't tell my husband while we were still in the village, I know what it would have resulted to. he knows his brother and knows how to handle him, but i didn't want all that drama.

Ordinary how many years una wan bring wahala spoil family union untop rubbish. Eheen!? If he says so can't you simply play along with him? Abi senior wife wan put money for ur account? Women and petty things. That's how rivalry will start because of nonsense. Abi who senior wife eep? And yes she is because she got married to first. Being senior wife in Igbo land has nothing to do with Age or d fact that ur husband is d first one.

In Igbo tradition she is the most Senior wife in the family bcs she came first,it has nothing to do the way your husband and his brothers rank,so she is your elder now you take instructions from her as the eldest wife,she and your mother inland will be the one that will introduce u to village meetings and other family affairs.

kosi2018:
Good evening all and a happy new year to you all,
Pls I want to seek the opinions of the Igbo's in the house.
My husband is the first son out of four boys. My husband and his immediate younger brother brought/introduced their wives to be to their parents at the same time, their parents are not together, so we met their father for the first time in the city. The younger brother's wife to be arrived before I did, and we were received by our father in-law to be very well.
That same period, Christmas period, we also travelled to the east to be introduced to their mother, i arrived first and their mother welcomed me well and told me I am her first daughter in law because they brought me to her first.
The younger brother got married before his elder brother.
What prompted this write up is that on many occasions, my brother in-law will always say his wife is the senior wife, that she was married before me, I will just laff and smile because I'm not dragging anything with her, age wise I'm senior to her.
I told my husband, he said I shouldn't bother my self that where he stands in d family that is where I stand.
This December while in d village he made reference to it again, i told my husband what his brother said when we arrived the city, he quarreled with me for not telling him while we were still in the village, I just told me I don't want them to quarrel.
So pls, I need elders to say one or two things concerning this matter, so that I will know how to reply him when next he says such.. Thanks. pls i will be glad if this hit front page

see he is trying to stair up serious strife which would pitch you against the family. Your brother has made it known that you are the senior, so if their is any issue his younger brother raises is none of your biz

kosi2018:
I'm not disputing the fact that she came before me, which automatically makes her the first daughter inlaw of the family, she has two sons already and I'm still waiting on the lord, my concern is why is he acting as if I'm depriving his wife of anything, bringing of seniority issue at every slight opportunity, as someone advice before, I will find out, I want to know why he is feeling that way.

is just a bit of narcissm.

Honestly, I won't advise you to ignore him,have your husband trash the matter with him once and for all or this may cause problem in future.

Who senior wife epp? Your brother in law is just trying to stir conflict by being pettty

kosi2018:
me I nor de do pass my self oo, I'm a very cool headed person, me and my co wife are in very good terms, she is very cool headed just as I am, its just my bro inlaw that is behaving the way u don't understand. thanks for your input .

It's ok then, it then means say, e get wetin your brother in law dey find be that. Just ignore and behave as if you aren't seeing him. Greet him and pass when next you all are together ...
Dohhh... Take care....

This is unnecessary,but since it came out ,we will discuss it.The first son in Igbo land is d okpara of the family and no condition changes that.Weather the second or fourth son got married before him, nothing changes his position in the family.Same goes to his wife.The fact that the second son married before him does not give his(second) wife the first position.The first son's wife is the first wife of that family.

The younger brother's wife is the head wife... Cos she was married into the family first.

kosi2018:
Good evening all and a happy new year to you all,
Pls I want to seek the opinions of the Igbo's in the house.
My husband is the first son out of four boys. My husband and his immediate younger brother brought/introduced their wives to be to their parents at the same time, their parents are not together, so we met their father for the first time in the city. The younger brother's wife to be arrived before I did, and we were received by our father in-law to be very well.
That same period, Christmas period, we also travelled to the east to be introduced to their mother, i arrived first and their mother welcomed me well and told me I am her first daughter in law because they brought me to her first.
The younger brother got married before his elder brother.
What prompted this write up is that on many occasions, my brother in-law will always say his wife is the senior wife, that she was married before me, I will just laff and smile because I'm not dragging anything with her, age wise I'm senior to her.
I told my husband, he said I shouldn't bother my self that where he stands in d family that is where I stand.
This December while in d village he made reference to it again, i told my husband what his brother said when we arrived the city, he quarreled with me for not telling him while we were still in the village, I just told me I don't want them to quarrel.
So pls, I need elders to say one or two things concerning this matter, so that I will know how to reply him when next he says such.. Thanks. pls i will be glad if this hit front page

Maybe I just have no tolerance for all this 'he said, she said' and drama with people I neither live nor work with.

Whether your BIL and his wife claim to be the first wife or not, how does it affect you?

Do you live together? Do they pay your salary into her account because she is your senior wife?

Your husband has told you not to bother yourself so what is the problem?

Why don't you save this energy for when REAL issues come up (if they do)?

Abeg, leave this pettiness for 2020. It is because you greet your BIL more than one sentence that's why he is telling you his wife is the senior one.

goodmorning40:
I have seen where this type of issue created a big problem in the family
There was an occasion cow was killed and meat shared, the packing of the meat was to be according to seniority, one of the wives made attempt to pack the other objected stressing she is the senior wife since her husband is older than the other wife husband, the other wife refused stressing that she was married first came into the family first so therefore she is senior

Na so kasala burstoo

Na poverty dey make some people loose focus wahlai... God please bless everyone with wealth and wisdom... Who senior epp abeg

bukatyne:


Maybe I just have no tolerance for all this 'he said, she said' and drama with people I neither live nor work with.

Whether your BIL and his wife claim to be the first wife or not, how does it affect you?

Do you live together? Do they pay your salary into her account because she is your senior wife?

Your husband has told you not to bother yourself so what is the problem?

Why don't you save this energy for when REAL issues come up (if they do)?

Abeg, leave this pettiness for 2020. It is because you greet your BIL more than one sentence that's why he is telling you his wife is the senior one.

i wonder when men became petty. If the BIL has issues with seniority he should discuss it with his elder brother, not going around and making side comments to his elder brother's wife.

bukatyne:


Maybe I just have no tolerance for all this 'he said, she said' and drama with people I neither live nor work with.

Whether your BIL and his wife claim to be the first wife or not, how does it affect you?

Do you live together? Do they pay your salary into her account because she is your senior wife?

Your husband has told you not to bother yourself so what is the problem?

Why don't you save this energy for when REAL issues come up (if they do)?

Abeg, leave this pettiness for 2020. It is because you greet your BIL more than one sentence that's why he is telling you his wife is the senior one

Exactly @ the bolded.