Good afternoon sir, hope ur good,I am sorry i �missed ur calls ,I left d phone in d house on hurry to school.i am very sorry about that, sincerely from my heart it was not intentional.thanks for ur understanding.


Dear nairalanders, the above is a WhatsApp message from a wife to her husband after one week plus of her disrespect.

It happened that every morning and night the husband must call from his base where he works(another state) to check on his wife and family and to ensure all is well. But most times his wife will either not pick the call nor create the chance to call back as scheduled. As a result the man now bought phone for the kids but the wife will either collect the phone or run down the battery to frustrate the mans efforts to reach out. The man has discussed this one on one with the wife and the wife would always promise to change but after a while go back to her own plans.

What breaks the camel back was last week the man called from morning and no response, afternoon no response till 4pm no response and after a while he called again and the wife picked and started shouting at him that why is he always calling that she wants to call their daughter first before returning his call. This she did and by the time he was calling her husband back the man was already angry, because he had expected an apology.

It was out of discussion with the pastor of her church that she decided to send the above apology via WhatsApp. Already the man is angry and have gone incommunicado all this while until the pastor called him to plead for forgiveness.

Do you advice the man to accept the apology by his wife in the format above? Remember the wife has been disrespectful and disloyal to the man which the man has endured all this while.

Pls your mature input is appreciated. Thanks

The handwriting is bodly written on the wall my bro....

The woman is cheating confidently and you have been dethroned by the guy fuçking your wife as the head of the house....

If you try calling her now, she won't pick your calls... As we are here talking, she might be with the Man who dethroned you, and na knack dem wan knack so.


So sorry bro, make E be later nah.

My son, based on my little experience in life, lemme give my advise.

You see there are three sides to a story; the husband's, the wife's and the truth.

And sometimes, in a conflict, both sides aren't entirely right or wrong. Rather, they're both holding on the truth to some extent and they are wrong to some extent.

On the part of the husband, what a beautiful husband he is for seeking to check on his family! But how frequently does he do this? And does he put into consideration the daily condition of his wife and he pays attention to the time he knows she will be fine and not disturbed by picking his call?

You see, someone we don't see or know their condition, we cannot just get offended by their behaviour. Perhaps, the husband calls too frequently, an arrangement the wife finds disturbing and she decides not to pick his call to pass a message of displeasure towards that attitude. Perhaps, he doesn't call at the right time; the time when the wife will be fine and not irritated or disturbed by holding a conversation with him.

Or Perhaps, he could have taken care of this and pays attention to the time and how much he calls - which exonerates him of the blame - but the wife is now the problematic, troublesome one.

Whichever way, let the husband pay attention to this and adjust if he's found wanting.

Or based on the attitude of some women, she's displeased with him about something and she decided to get back at him that way. Dialogue is very important in this regard. Let the husband calm down and talk to his wife concerning this attitude and let them try to see sense with each other. Perhaps, the cause of everything shall be revealed and the matter shall be settled.

On the side of the wife, if the husband has not tried to hurt or disturb her with his calls, then she's clearly on a wrong side. An upright man is responsible for and looks after his family. And it is only part of fulfilling this duty that a man should check on his family to be assured of their well-being and safety. Let the wife understand this and she should understand that the husband isn't being insecure or wanting to make things difficult for her. She should understand that respect for one's spouse is important from both sides and she shouldn't be found wanting in giving the respect as at when due. Whatever it is that's preventing her from answering his call, let her adjust concerning it and give her husband his due time.

If she would not give her husband his due time, then why agree to marry him on first place?!!! What kind of an institution did she call the marriage she was getting into? what's the essence of the union if they don't relate as they should from time to time?

And if there's something bothering her or displeasing her about him, let her stop being childish and address the issue constructively. Let her talk to her husband about it so he can know what exactly it is and they can sort it out.

All the same; marriage is about deliberation and compromise. Let both parties come together and have a hearty and constructive discussion, setting all their sentiments aside and work towards a better home. Let them be willing to sacrifice some things for the benefit of their marriage.

If they are both not willing to be understanding and do sacrifice for the sake of marriage, then perhaps, they are better off not marrying at all.

my advise son.


..................

By the way, please check my signature and patronize us for your data. Na beg I dey beg. Thanks.

The wife is hardly at home. She doesn't pick calls cos she's aware the husband will ask to speak with the children...The reason she collected the kid's phone.


Accepting or rejecting the apology can not stop that woman from doing her illicit acts.

Lolz.they now communicate through whatsapp casually like chatmate buddies...from the intro of the **forced text**
The said apology letter looks more like ABSU admission letter.




Choi...see finish in marriage is crazy I tell yah.

Just need some mature inputs I will put together and advise my friend, he is not on nairaland.

Of a truth......marriage is one helluva gbege....it's best followed jejely.


All I see is that the man married a very calmed wife, who's hell bent in frustrating the man's every moves.... perhaps she has one cool guy somewhere with big powerful Ps2 GBOLA who's scattering her dada,but it does always end in premium tears.


The bitter truth is ..the man is just wasting his time cox the woman ain't gonna change from her new found habits.


THE WOMAN IS CHEATING.

So that woman needed her pastor to tell her to change her attitude and apologize... That woman has close to no respect for that her husband and it's a pity.

I wont be surprised that this same husband was seeing all these "Red flags" when love dey shack am, but he still went ahead with marriage.

If he likes let him forgive, if he likes let him not forgive, I Personally don't give Fúck.

She may not be cheating...

Tell your friend to set a trap for her if he's not sure...

Meanwhile, could there be other things responsible?

Is your friend a serial philanderer?

She could be pissing over something she's not ready to share but is getting back at him.

Gozye:
Good afternoon sir, hope ur good,I am sorry i �missed ur calls ,I left d phone in d house on hurry to school.i am very sorry about that, sincerely from my heart it was not intentional.thanks for ur understanding.


Dear nairalanders, the above is a WhatsApp message from a wife to her husband after one week plus of her disrespect.

It happened that every morning and night the husband must call from his base where he works(another state) to check on his wife and family and to ensure all is well. But most times his wife will either not pick the call nor create the chance to call back as scheduled. As a result the man now bought phone for the kids but the wife will either collect the phone or run down the battery to frustrate the mans efforts to reach out. The man has discussed this one on one with the wife and the wife would always promise to change but after a while go back to her own plans.

What breaks the camel back was last week the man called from morning and no response, afternoon no response till 4pm no response and after a while he called again and the wife picked and started shouting at him that why is he always calling that she wants to call their daughter first before returning his call. This she did and by the time he was calling her husband back the man was already angry, because he had expected an apology.

It was out of discussion with the pastor of her church that she decided to send the above apology via WhatsApp. Already the man is angry and have gone incommunicado all this while until the pastor called him to plead for forgiveness.

Do you advice the man to accept the apology by his wife in the format above? Remember the wife has been disrespectful and disloyal to the man which the man has endured all this while.

Pls your mature input is appreciated. Thanks

Give me d contract make I track am, investigat and confirm whether she dey go collect prick outside before u proceed...

Na so distance marriage be or show up unannounced and try install coded CCTV for house

DaddyRochie1642:
So that woman needed her pastor to tell her to change her attitude and apologize... That woman has close to no respect for that her husband and it's a pity.

I wont be surprised that this same husband was seeing all these "Red flags" when love dey shack am, but he still went ahead with marriage.

If he likes let him forgive, if he likes let him not forgive, I Personally don't give Bleep.

Na pastors dey think for women bro

Na wa.


Mr Oga are you the man? Cos I can feel the anger in your story.

That woman is possessed by familiar spirit. Confirm one. That's how they used to frustrate people. Ordinary call they won't call. Pick, they won't pick. Call back nko? They will somehow forget till one week.

It's familiar spirit.

You need to relocate your family to your base. Or you forget about the marriage. Sorry to say.

Why?

Cos once a woman reaches that stage of airing your messages, or refusing to communicate with you, or always forgetting to call back, she is gone. She has moved on in her heart. Only a big problem that terrifies her can make her change for a little while, then it's back to ignoring you again. Sorry.

How many times will you run to pastor to patch things up? She no longer needs you. Is she "online" on WhatsApp but always ignoring your messages? Then perhaps someone else is giving her the attention she used to enjoy from you. You have your work cut out for you.

It is going to be frustrating journey if you want to get her back. No guarantees too.

AfroKnight:
Na wa.


Mr Oga are you the man? Cos I can feel the anger in your story.

That woman is possessed by familiar spirit. Confirm one. That's how they used to frustrate people. Ordinary call they won't call. Pick, they won't pick. Call back nko? They will somehow forget till one week.

It's familiar spirit.

You need to relocate your family to your base. Or you forget about the marriage. Sorry to say.

Why?

Cos once a woman reaches that stage of airing your messages, or refusing to communicate with you, or always forgetting to call back, she is gone. She has moved on in her heart. Only a big problem that terrifies her can make her change for a little while, then it's back to ignoring you again. Sorry.

How many times will you run to pastor to patch things up? She no longer needs you. Is she "online" on WhatsApp but always ignoring your messages? Then perhaps someone else is giving her the attention she used to enjoy from you. You have your work cut out for you.

It is going to be frustrating journey if you want to get her back. No guarantees too.

Thanks a lot Afronight, I work with a private firm in the North, while she works as a teacher in a state government school in the SouthEast that makes it a bit impossible for her transfer since she is in a state school. But all you stated here is what she has been doing.

Gozye:





Thanks a lot Afronight, I work with a private firm in the North, while she works as a teacher in a state government school in the SouthEast that makes it a bit impossible for her transfer since she is in a state school. But all you stated here is what she has been doing.

Brotherly, the distance is not helping matters. Out of sight is out of mind.

Take leave, if you can. Spend a couple of days with your family and observe her. Play with your kids so much that they will beg you to stay when it's time to leave, then tell them to video call you on WhatsApp every night. Hopefully, they will prevail on their mother to allow them to call you.

As for your wife, she is an adult and to be honest, only God can help you with her. She seems to respect the pastor, but for how long. If he tells her what she doesn't want to hear, she can always change her church.

As long as your conscience tells you that her behaviour is not as a result of an offence you committed, don't blame yourself. Don't kill yourself with guilt. It is frustrating to sustain a relationship/friendship/marriage on your own. It will drain you. It will affect your performance at work, if you keep ruminating on it. So, comot your mind, until you can visit and spend time with your family. If she doesnt warm up to you while you're around, just prepare your mind, cos she can wake up one day to pull the plug on the whole marriage.

Yes, accept the apology.

Now, one thing I want you to understand is that, your wife is ladened with loads of responsibilities in the home front. From chores to school runs, to market runs and her personal demands she has to meet up with. So, calling her from your comfort zone time to time and expecting her to always be available to attend to your calls makes you come across as inconsiderate. I mean... She doesn't have any support to ease the duties off her, yet youre there placing your own demands from afar. Haba... Put yourself in her shoes or do you want her to collapse?

Oga, chilax. Madam is trying with managing the roles of two people single handedly. Stop mounting more pressure on her.

Accept her apology and free her. Biko.

AfroKnight:
Na wa.


Mr Oga are you the man? Cos I can feel the anger in your story.

That woman is possessed by familiar spirit. Confirm one. That's how they used to frustrate people. Ordinary call they won't call. Pick, they won't pick. Call back nko? They will somehow forget till one week.

It's familiar spirit.

You need to relocate your family to your base. Or you forget about the marriage. Sorry to say.

Why?

Cos once a woman reaches that stage of airing your messages, or refusing to communicate with you, or always forgetting to call back, she is gone. She has moved on in her heart. Only a big problem that terrifies her can make her change for a little while, then it's back to ignoring you again. Sorry.

How many times will you run to pastor to patch things up? She no longer needs you. Is she "online" on WhatsApp but always ignoring your messages? Then perhaps someone else is giving her the attention she used to enjoy from you. You have your work cut out for you.

It is going to be frustrating journey if you want to get her back. No guarantees too.

Na wa o. How do you know all these?

AsherAmari:
Yes, accept the apology.

Now, one thing I want you to understand is that, your wife is ladened with loads of responsibilities in the home front. From chores to school runs, to market runs and her personal demands she has to meet up with. So, calling her from your comfort zone time to time and expecting her to always be available to attend to your calls makes you come across as inconsiderate. I mean... She doesn't have any support to ease the duties off her, yet youre there placing your own demands from afar. Haba... Put yourself in her shoes or do you want her to collapse?

Oga, chilax. Madam is trying with managing the roles of two people single handedly. Stop mounting more pressure on her.

Accept her apology and free her. Biko.

You are among the club of women who will still tag the man bad if he doesn't call at all, do you know what the family went thru just this one week plus that the man went incommunicado? Both the children and the woman felt the heat,but for the sake of the kids the man had to send some money this evening

Gozye:



You are among the club of women who will still tag the man bad if he doesn't call at all, do you know what the family went thru just this one week plus that the man went incommunicado? Both the children and the woman felt the heat,but for the sake of the kids the man had to send some money this evening

The man is the one trying to destroy his family with anger. He should calm down and be reasonable. Please!

You left the woman to be carrying all the burden and expect her to give you her best.

Gozye:





Thanks a lot Afronight, I work with a private firm in the North, while she works as a teacher in a state government school in the SouthEast that makes it a bit impossible for her transfer since she is in a state school. But all you stated here is what she has been doing.

I guess that's what you were expecting. Someone to massage your ego and help you push the blame on your wife.

You better don't let someone who doesn't even have a relationship destroy your marriage with evil advices.