Mindlog:


So warped that some believe that having a healthy marriage is a sign of weakness, of being emasculated.

Insecurity has a way of clouding the logical sphere of the brain. Makes you wonder what went wrong. Where did this fear of not being manly enough stem from? How comes so many men confuse being strong with being an asshole? It takes much more strength and a whole lot of wisdom to be a powerful gentleman. That's the art.

There is a sad increase of children and adolescents with attachment disorder and conduct disorders all due to dysfunctional homes. I know after completing my specialty in Clinical Child Psychology, my appointment book would be brimming with young ones who needs professional intervention.

You will need to do a lot of damage control. My hopes lie with you and your colleagues.

cococandy:
How does one double like a post? Because this is thumbs up. The goal of all moral policing of women and preaching about values is never because those who say it mean are good people or that they even believe it.
It’s because to them, that is a way they can scare women into thinking they do not deserve anything more than a mediocre existence subject to the generosity of the man giving it.

I needed to bookmark this sentence.

cococandy:
How does one double like a post? Because this is thumbs up. The goal of all moral policing of women and preaching about values is never because those who say it mean are good people or that they even believe it.
It’s because to them, that is a way they can scare women into thinking they do not deserve anything more than a mediocre existence subject to the generosity of the man giving it.

It is their insecurities speaking, the fear of the possibility that a woman can have a better life outside the man she severed relationship with.

I recall back in school, my Marriage and Family Therapy lecturer said most men fear second marriages except the ones gifted with the gene of being serial husbands because when a marriage collapses, women are usually blamed as being the cause, the man is hailed and convinced that there are women who are eager to be his wife and the need for him to be reflective over his role in his failed marriage is ignored.

He goes into another marriage without changing things in himself that may have caused the earlier flop and begins to realize that it is also heading the way of the first but because he doesn't want the attention of the society to redirect at him and begin to have a rethink that the ex-wife wasn't really at fault but the man, he is now forced to swallow things he wouldn't have in his first marriage and some wives of the second marriage cash in on that but there are men whey no send, they are eager for their third marriage and the next....until they are no longer financially attractive to draw women into marriage.

For a gender that claims not to benefit from marriage, you guys spend way too much time pressurizing women to marry or remain in marriages.

But we all know it is not because you care about women.

Mindlog:


"Everyone knows that while men age like wine, women age like milk.".......And who is more likely to outlive the other?

50 years in biss is better than 80 years as a single divorced woman.

postmann:


50 years in biss is better than 80 years as a single divorced woman.

What is your definition of "bliss" in your context?

Where did you read it up or were you taught in school that being single or divorced is a mental disorder?

Go read gerontology journals and also observe your environment more keenly without being beclouded, you will note that women retain family and social webs better than men. In old age, old women are less lonely than old men as you are more likely to see an old man living alone without family than seeing an old woman living so.

I have a solution.

Modern men should be humble enough to embrace the role of a househusband while their modern wives go work for the money.

By the time they want to get divorced, he's the one who will gain half or more of her their property.
Afterall, he deserves all of it and so much more for taking a back-seat and losing out on his own advancement just to support her ambitions.

Sense will not kill me lai lai...

TRASH TRASH TRASH..... you sound like children do not grow, like she will forever be caring for infants. The child will grow and keep her company. Divorce is better than a sad marriage. Oga, even the divorced man might not be lucky to get a lady better than the wife he divorced, you mentioned a virgin, you are a joker, go find virgin let me see. You think decent virgin girls are looking for old divorced men? That's why you men die in your loneliness, because you abandon your kids to wife, the wife bears all the praises and pains, while you die in loneliness or get killed by side chick or still have a second failed marriage.

, you are totally correct, or a knot just unscrewed from his brain. He thinks he can guiltstrip and fool women, he thinks this is olden days? Who marriage epp? Is marriage life? Matcheeww.

Saintmary:


This is what happens when you smoke Oshogbo weed before reading your Bible.

The problem with the OP's posit and position, which makes his post repulsive, stems from the same place of ignorance, love for oppression and outright delight in evil like almost all of you cherish so much. OP, just like many men, has an erroneous understanding of what respect, submission, loyalty, etc means, just like almost all of you on the opposing side have an erroneous understanding of what a loving and understanding husband is.

- To the OP, a respectful, submissive, loyal wife is a wife who condones witting and unwitting nonsense actions and inactions from her husband.

- And to many of you on the opposing side, a loving and understanding husband - a real man - is a husband who condones your witting and unwitting nonsense actions and inactions.

Hypocritically disingenuous and unscrupulous lots. A healthy marriage is only possible where altruism in particular and scrupulousness, which must be met in words and actions by both parties, are the bond that holds the spouses together. And in the absence of them, divorce or separation is better than togetherness in such union, except where one or both parties involved are insane and derive pleasure in abuses.

Your lecturer really hit the nail on the head .

Mindlog:


It is their insecurities speaking, the fear of the possibility that a woman can have a better life outside the man she severed relationship with.

I recall back in school, my Marriage and Family Therapy lecturer said most men fear second marriages except the ones gifted with the gene of being serial husbands because when a marriage collapses, women are usually blamed as being the cause, the man is hailed and convinced that there are women who are eager to be his wife and the need for him to be reflective over his role in his failed marriage is ignored.

He goes into another marriage without changing things in himself that may have caused the earlier flop and begins to realize that it is also heading the way of the first but because he doesn't want the attention of the society to redirect at him and begin to have a rethink that the ex-wife wasn't really at fault but the man, he is now forced to swallow things he wouldn't have in his first marriage and some wives of the second marriage cash in on that but there are men whey no send, they are eager for their third marriage and the next....until they are no longer financially attractive to draw women into marriage.

pocohantas:
For a gender that claims not to benefit from marriage, you guys spend way too much time pressurizing women to marry or remain in marriages.

But we all know it is not because you care about women.

Every. Passing. Minute.

marriage is not a do or die affair. nothing last for ever except d word of God. not all marriage last because not all men are husband material. it is perfectly said that wat a man can do, a woman can do more better..

Mindlog:
The intention of this thread by the OP is to scare women into remaining in marriages that is toxic to their overall well-being and probably their children', that it is safer to remain in that cage because out there, they will find it difficult to readjist!

I guess OP never researched on how women whose husbands abandoned them and their kids to start a new life elsewhere have coped. If overwhelming majority of Nigerian widows have after the death of their husband ,on their own raised their children without assistance from her late husband's family, he would have a better understanding that post divorce is not all about darkness for a woman, that is why many forward thinking lawyers who are into marriage and family law refer their female clients to a licensed MFT (Marriage and Family Therapist) for pre-divorce and post-divorce therapy which is intended to disabuse their minds from the traditional views that she is a nobody without the spouse who feels he is not obligated in contributing to make the marriage a healthy one. A woman with a good lawyer who legally divorced properly should be able to secure the obligations the man has towards their children who are products of their union...school fees, healthcare etc and not subject those obligations to his mood swings.

I laughed where OP brought up the changing of light bulbs, that the woman would be helpless! Uncle, you have no idea on how majority of Reverend Sisters do things for themselves, Sisters whey dey slit the necks, roast and butcher goats themselves, pack am for freezer na to change light bulbs go come be rocket science!

God hates divorce, just as He hates the repeated intentional behaviours and actions that leads to divorce, you leave your cooking unattended to and still believe sogged or burnt food is not your portion.

Focus should be on husbands and wives working as a team for a healthy marriage and a conducive family life where the husband, the wife and the children they have been blessed with, can thrive.

You hit the nail of the head. Men just try to use manipulative narratives to keep women enslaved in marriages that they should walk away from.

We keep hearing that women age faster than men, yet women still keep aging and outlive the men.

Their insecurity and need to be in control is so evident in these kind of writeups they come up with. The crazy thing is that many of these guys that have alot to say about marriage/divorce issues are single.

socialmediaman:


but Nigerian women are the most unfaithful partners in the whole world and the second highest in the world in terms of paternity fraud

https://www.channelstv.com/2012/07/16/nigerian-women-are-most-unfaithful-in-the-world-durex

https://www.vanguardngr.com/2021/01/nigeria-ranks-2nd-highest-in-paternity-fraud-in-the-world/

What does this have to do with the OP?

bukatyne:


What does this have to do with the OP?

It was directed at your comment, not the OP

Didn't bother reading after number 2 reason why you shouldn't divorce.

Ladies, over to una


Make I go look for better drama watch