It is one thing to choose the right partner in marriage and it is another to choose the right approach to courtship. A wrong approach to Christian courtship can still lead to problems or failure even when the right choice has been made. Therefore, believers in courtship must be holy through and through if they would eat the good of the land of marriage (Isaiah 1:19).

Sister, you must know that a man will typically be at his best during courtship. He would call you by different pet names, please you and make you feel secure. However, once the wedding ceremony is over and you begin to live together, his shortcomings will be more exposed to you. The saying that love is blind may appear true but the one that also says marriage is an eye opener has equally been proven to be true now and again.

Men are however not the only ones guilty of this. Brother, you will also discover a lot more about the personality of your wife after the wedding ceremony. This is why the world recommends that couples should cohabit during courtship but should this be found among children of God? The simple answer is No! Ephesians 4:14 says:
“That we henceforth be no more children, tossed to and fro, and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the sleight of men, and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie in wait to deceive;”

The fact that you are in courtship does not give you the license to begin to cohabit. Trial marriage has no place in Christianity; it is whoredom. Some so-called sisters also try to seduce naive brothers to get them pregnant and the result is what the world calls a shotgun marriage one not properly prepared for. God abhors this seriously (Hebrews 13:4).

Christian courtships must be characterized with sincerity. You must be able to share your past and present experiences with your would-be spouse. You both should also lay your future bare in the hands of Jesus Christ. While there may be sincere disagreements during courtship, you would have to prayerfully re-evaluate it if the relationship is rife with troubles from the sinful demands of your partner. A broken courtship is better than a broken marriage. Be warned!
Written by Pastor E.A. Adeboye.