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Serenading My Pharmacy Crush With Dispensing Terminologies
Authors:

PANS National
2 days ago views 1189
Serenading My Pharmacy Crush With Dispensing Terminologies
By: Sopuruchukwu V. Mamah (Editor, UNN)

I know this one girl; she can be more potent than barbiturates, and quite as deadly too;

The reason why?

'Cause she takes my breath away.

During practicals, I would write down her name in the poison register. Despite warning myself, I was forced to come to terms with it. Even though my pride absolutely forbade it, this girl...she made feelings churn within me — a constant trituration, bringing my feelings to a fever pitch.

But I knew, that no antipyretic could taper down this heat. So I thought, ‘what harm could come from threading the first stitch?’

So I took my pen to a paper, weaving a love story for my dispensing crush.

My prayer was that we would both be caught in its web; like oversized granules, in a sieve mesh.

I wrote:

You’re my medicine, mi amor. If you had a label, they’d be just one API: beauty.

I’ve checked all your brand names, and your chemical name, they all say the same thing: cutie.

Angelina, you give me a fever, but I won’t take no pill — nah! Boil me, like a hydrocarbon base.

Your smile is an elixir, indicated for my inflamed heart; now I need no aspirin... 'Cause you are my NSAID.

I was rushed to the ICU yesterday. Apparently I’d overdosed. Guess what they said I’d overdosed on. Apparently, it was you.

They gave me a prescription. Underneath, in red marker, was written, ‘CAUTION: NOT TO BE TAKEN WITH ANGELINA.’

I remember thinking, ‘what misinformation!’ So I wrote a new prescription. A physician he may be, but an apothecary, I am.

I worked out a master formula. After a few calculations, a working formula too: you plus me equals love dosage form.

Transference losses may occur as we try to love each other, don’t fret... I added overages to our master formula.

It may not be given intravenously, but, this love still has a 100% bioavailability.

I never learnt to speak frankly, so I always use metaphors.

Let me put this next thing I’m about to say, in a way, that you in particular will understand.

Let me be your mould, Angelina. I know just how much you love to make suppositories during practicals.

So, let me be the mould for only you, for all the dispensing practicals, of the rest of our lives.

And if you don’t mind, perhaps even in the afterlife.

With love, from your seatmate, Sebastian.

Authors:

Pharmaceutical student association of Nigeria.


PANS National