₦airaland Forum

xxcarolxx:
You have a control freak on your hands, have you spoke to him about been a control freak, You need to have a life that involves friends and not revolves around your bf,

MRbrownJAY:
@poster
definitely an insecure, very jealous CONTROL FREAK.
let him know that you want to have a mind of your own and that he should accept (or leave) who you are as a person RATHER THAN trying to make you act/be into who he desires.

YOU are also part of the problem, when allowing this charade to go on and on, the minute you put your foot down, is the minute you will start to live.

the threat of killing you should have been the moment to say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH and bye bye!

Frazy:
I have a boyfriend who will not let me see my doctor alone except he is present. one time i went to the clinic to complain of an ailment, the doctor ask me what was wrong with me, before i could open my mouth to talk, he cuts in and started the explanation on my behalf. The doctor said he should allow me to do the explanation my self since i am not dumb, he got angry and walks me out from the clinic.

When we go out, either to a restaurant or public parks, if i should look in the direction  where it happens that other guys are sitting , he will ask me why am i looking at other guys. When we go to club, is either he dance with me or i dance with the wall, he doesn't allow any person to dance with me.

He alienated me from my female friends, because he his afraid that they will spoil me. Right now i don't have any friends both female or male.

To make matter worst,  each morning  he comes into my office and kiss me in front of my boss. I am afraid that if it continues like this i may loose my job.

This is getting out of hand and i don't think i can handle this any longer.

Please i need a honest and sincere advise.

Eyah fellow girls like you has showed the guy pepper so hes been careful with what he has

dont blame him, blame your fellow ladies

xxcarolxx:
190, hey just gave me an idea, anyone who annoys me throw pepper in their eyes,

MRbrownJAY:
@poster
FEAR is what this guy is using to control you, it is wrong and the earlier you stop this ONE SIDED r/ship, the best it will be for you or anyone involved.

what next is he gonna tell you?! have sex with animals or i kill you? murder people or i kill you? jump from a bridge or i kill you?

NONSENSE!!!!

xxcarolxx:
He knows you are fearful of him, which is why he uses threats, Until you learn to stand up for yourself and stop been fearful, your going to continue living in this cycle, Only you and you alone can break this cycle, Have you got brothers, ask them to give him a good hiding, But if you continue with him, you are allowing him to control you, and god knows then what will happen, Speak to your parents,

xxcarolxx:
@Frazy, you are welcome, once you break the cycle you will be fine, but please do tell your parents, If you do split with him, never go back, you will find a decent guy out there one  who doesn't need to control your every movement, Stay safe,

Frazy:
Oh Thanks a million times.
I feel relief talking out on NL and getting all this advise.

MRbrownJAY:
@poster
why havent you told your brothers and sisters about it yet? why do you protect this insane guy so much?!
your desperation to be in a r/ship will be your downfall, if you aint careful.
the sad fact is that this man DOES NOT LOVE YOU, he cant possibly love you by treating you this way. you show him love, affection etc and yet, he treats you wrong,belittles you, hurts you emotionally and threatens you. is that love in your world?

there are many ways to go about in leaving such a man:
FIRST i suggest you let EVERYBODY knows what you have been going through. . . . . . .  meaning your parents, your brothers/sisters, close friends etc
SECOND [/b]you have to let that man know that you will NO LONGER follow what he says, and would rather do what YOU wish to do.
[b]THIRD you should at the same time tell him that if he really cares for you, he should allow you to be yourself as any caring loving person would.
FOURTH you should advise this man that he needs professional help in finding what seem to be HIS problems. the first step being to accept that he has a problem.
FIFTH if he makes any threats to you, simply tell your bros to pay him a visit. a few broken bones could also help in these difficult times!
SIXTH move on with your happy life while learning a great lesson: ANYONE WHO DOESNT ACCEPT YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE, DOESNT DESERVE YOU!