2019 I own a car, lived in my own house fed for myself and support my family.
but life happened, 2021 I was forced back to my parents house in the creeks, since then they the ones supporting me.

but what I noticed this year is that, they want to kill me with talk.
comparing me with other children, using my flaws to curse me up and down.

it's like the once bread winner of the familie became a sand and ants in their eyes.

back then 2018, everything I had I took it for granted.
my financial freedom I took it for granted, right now I got tears in my eyes.


my parent' literally killing my self esteem....yes I try to be strong by quarreling with them sometimes but deep down I feel the pain within me.

I that use to buy bag of rice for the family, droping 20k every week for them.
but now am reduced to nothing...

they tried for me.
l learnt the lesson.
when the going gets tough, family will cater for you to an extent.

What pains me the most is the present comparison, back then when I was the talk of the house...they wasn't any comparing.


I feel suicidal.

sometimes I feel motivated

I feel motivated to prove them wrong once more.


but sometimes I feel suicidal, like right now...this evening

Be positive bro, you still dey get toto fvck

The moment the money you had left you, respect from friends and family members also left.

Hehehehe. Lol.

meobizy:
Hehehehe. Lol.

may you have a similar case like mine. and may millions of people laugh at your predicament.

T0T0fucker:

may you have a similar case like mine.
and may millions of people laugh at your predicament.

Hehehehe. Lol.

If killing yourself will solve the problem, go ahead...

If ignoring them will solve the problem go ahead...

But I wonder why you give a shit, about what someone else think of you.

When someone misinterprets me and moves in the wrong direction, I just stay back n watch in silence, cause I know that sooner than later, I'll hear "I'm sorry"

Just close your eyes and pretend it's all a bad dream... Life's a joke, never take it to heart.

HeRulesMen:
The moment the money you had left you, respect from friends and family members also left.

yes your right, but what pains me the most is the words they are using to hurt me.

they are killing me with the words from their mouth.


sometimes I just think back to 2020 when I still had it all, tears will flow down my eyes.
na me be this God

Wetin you carry money do?

T0T0fucker:
they tried for me.
l learnt the lesson.
when the going gets tough, family will cater for you to an extent.

What pains me the most is the present comparison, back then when I was the talk of the house...they wasn't any comparing.


I feel suicidal.

sometimes I feel motivated

I feel motivated to prove them wrong once more.


but sometimes I feel suicidal, like right now...this evening

Get sense.....


You don't even appreciate the fact that they're trying to use words to push you back up?


If you get offended, get up and hustle.... Stop complaining... It's difficult to feed a grown up man...

Their fear could be that, you're over relaxing and might get used to it.. So go out and get something doing and appreciate them later ..

You don't expect them to keep feeding you.. This is Africa...

When I was struggling and went back home... my mum will talk to me and make me feel rejected.... I actually felt rejected and needed to be accepted and so I did everything and now I appreciate her for not letting me stay idle for too long ..

you that made that much will surely overcome this, man up.

yanabasee:


Get sense.....


You don't even appreciate the fact that they're trying to use words to push you back up?


If you get offended, get up and hustle.... Stop complaining... It's difficult to feed a grown up man...

Their fear could be that, you're over relaxing and might get used to it.. So go out and get something doing and appreciate them later ..

You don't expect them to keep feeding you.. This is Africa...

When I was struggling and went back home... my mum will talk to me and make me feel rejected.... I actually felt rejected and needed to be accepted and so I did everything and now I appreciate her for not letting me stay idle for too long ..

She actually messed up your esteem and mental faculty. That's why you now assume that it's okay for a grown up to suffer rejection and abuse in the hands of family. A year in his parent's house shouldn't attract ridicule but, of course, this is Nigeria, a country where people f00l themselves with transactional love.


Isn't this the same "family love" you all rate over the love you share with your wives and girlfriends?? The love that push you all to suicide and crime?

yanabasee:


Get sense.....


You don't even appreciate the fact that they're trying to use words to push you back up?


If you get offended, get up and hustle.... Stop complaining... It's difficult to feed a grown up man...

Their fear could be that, you're over relaxing and might get used to it.. So go out and get something doing and appreciate them later ..

You don't expect them to keep feeding you.. This is Africa...

When I was struggling and went back home... my mum will talk to me and make me feel rejected.... I actually felt rejected and needed to be accepted and so I did everything and now I appreciate her for not letting me stay idle for too long ..

I get your point manh, like I seriously do.
but you see my case and yours might be really different, I did a lot of stuff for my family when I was financially independent.. ties and roofing of the house.. sending my younger ones to school and even opened a business for mom.
can you believeed my dad told me this evening do I know how much for house rent? because I have a free roof am laying my head on..lol...me that packed out of the house since 2014.

you see like the poster above me said they is a better way to motivate and cheer up a person but not to ridicule them... that's something illiterate and low minded thinking individuals like you can't understand.

by the way am hustling, I don't sit in one place like you said.

the problem am having is just the effects their words are having on me whenever am with them.

it's killing me deeply....my self esteem.

In the spirit of conversation, let us remember we only heard one side of the story.

So, if you want to talk to the young man, fine. But leave the family alone.

Because I am sure he had help getting to where he was. And if you fall for stupid reasons, no one will applaud you for that.

As for the young man. If you really feel this way after a single fall, you weren't ready for rise and still aren't ready for another rise.

If na your nude leak, you for don kpai tey tey... Better cover your ears, unless you want to go crazy.

Acidosis:


She actually messed up your esteem and mental faculty. That's why you now assume that it's okay for a grown up to suffer rejection and abuse in the hands of family. A year in his parent's house shouldn't attract ridicule but, of course, this is Nigeria, a country where people f00l themselves with transactional love.


Isn't this the same "family love" you all rate over the love you share with your wives and girlfriends?? The love that push you all to suicide and crime?

Let the op go and be waiting for motivational speeches from his parents before he will move on like a man and start up....

His claim is that he did everything to his parents and should be accepted back as a lazy young man for as long as he desires ...

Lol... My self esteem pushed me into making it large in life and right now, I will never go broke... I have properties... I am into real estate...

My parents made me to understand that I needed to stand up and never to see home as a place to always run back if I fail... but to keep pushing... She told me that she won't be here forever and where do I think I will run to when she's gone? I was starved of food from my beloved mother.... Do I hate my mother... NO, do I support her, yes...

Ops, the first mistake you made is going back to your family and staying there for long,if na a room you fit hustle money for to rent please do,if you are living alone and you are not doing good, nobody knows. By the time you hustle more, you will surely have a changed story. There is still hope for a living life, don't get discourage and depressed, you are a man,move out by all means and face life. Don't allow anybody's word to depress you.
It will surely end in praise.

Eranders:
In the spirit of conversation, let us remember we only heard one side of the story.

So, if you want to talk to the young man, fine. But leave the family alone.

Because I am sure he had help getting to where he was. And if you fall for stupid reasons, no one will applaud you for that.

As for the young man. If you really feel this way after a single fall, you weren't ready for rise and still aren't ready for another rise.

If na your nude leak, you for don kpai tey tey... Better cover your ears, unless you want to go crazy.

am not the only one in this shoe.
many people have experienced same things like this.
if you think I brought my family here to be abused you lie, like I said they tried.

the reason why I created this thread because I had another encounter of words this evening, at the verge of it I was depressed and felt like to ease the steam.

guess what? I feel much better now..with the little hope I got from few people.
posting your adverts to and fro is against the nairaland rules..if that is what you are here for okay..
better not to comment at all.

T0T0fucker:

I get your point manh, like I seriously do.
but you see my case and yours might be really different, I did a lot of stuff for my family when I was financially independent.. ties and roofing of the house.. sending my younger ones to school and even opened a business for mom.
can you believeed my dad told me this evening do I know how much for house rent? because I have a free roof am laying my head on..lol...me that packed out of the house since 2014.

you see like the poster above me said they is a better way to motivate and cheer up a person but not to ridicule them... that's something illiterate and low minded thinking individuals like you can't understand.

by the way am hustling, I don't sit in one place like you said.

the problem am having is just the effects their words are having on me whenever am with them.

it's killing me deeply....my self esteem.

I am more educated and more exposed than you and your entire generation....


You that is struggling to feed and survive... You that gets knocked on by your parents is calling me illiterate?


I think you deserve whatever treatment you're getting from your parents...

The fact that you contributed to your parents house doesn't count as an achievement.... Sending your siblings to school or supporting your mother to start up a business should be your responsibility as a member of that house.... You had every right not to contribute...


You don't have any problem over the words they're giving you... you have friends to go stay with... Infact, if you're having anything to do at the moment, you'd rented a place first and move out.... but because you're too lazy and too childish....

T0T0fucker:
2019 I own a car, lived in my own house fed for myself and support my family.
but life happened, 2021 I was forced back to my parents house in the creeks, since then they the ones supporting me.

but what I noticed this year is that, they want to kill me with talk.
comparing me with other children, using my flaws to curse me up and down.

it's like the once bread winner of the familie became a sand and ants in their eyes.

back then 2018, everything I had I took it for granted.
my financial freedom I took it for granted, right now I got tears in my eyes.


my parent' literally killing my self esteem....yes I try to be strong by quarreling with them sometimes but deep down I feel the pain within me.

I that use to buy bag of rice for the family, droping 20k every week for them.
but now am reduced to nothing...

See ehn
As much as this hurt's
You'll have to accept it as part of life.
You always knew the good goings,now you're seeing the other part.
Ha, don't let shock make you kill yourself o
If life hasn't shown its other side to you,then know you were born lucky,but now that it has.
Accept you weren't born lucky okay.
It hurts yes but see when,life is damn shitty
All you have to ask yourself is,is there anything I can do about it?
If no,then listen, killing yourself is the worst shame to yourself,you didn't just reduce yourself to nothing but reduced your existence to nothing.
Think of it this way
One thing you richly have with you right now is a life many no longer have.
Don't take that away
That's a blessing
Please your existence is a blessing and don't make these shockers make you take that away.
You don't know what happens afterlife.
Life is vanity because of death.
So while you are still living,do everything to keep living,no matter what happens.
It's the best of riches this world can offer.

Not everyone can withstand psychological pain especially when it comes from loved ones.

Some people thrive when they're gently encouraged and nurtured by family when they are down, any form of rejection or harsh treatment makes their mental state and situation worse.

For some, the more adversarial their family is, the more motivated they are to do better and prove them wrong.

Verbal and mental abuse is not a form of encouragement, no one benefits from it. You're suffering then on top of it family makes sure you don't have peace,and worst part is they think if they don't abuse you, you'll get lazy and relax.It is not okay and should not be normalized.


You can motivate someone by reminding them of who they are, their abilities and what they can achieve. That should be more effective than calling someone useless and lazy.

A family that loves understands where their child falls in and gives them the kind of support that fits the person they are.

Op, I wish you well, I hope you find all the strength you need to pull yourself up and succeed again.

Acidosis:


She actually messed up your esteem and mental faculty. That's why you now assume that it's okay for a grown up to suffer rejection and abuse in the hands of family. A year in his parent's house shouldn't attract ridicule but, of course, this is Nigeria, a country where people f00l themselves with transactional love.


Isn't this the same "family love" you all rate over the love you share with your wives and girlfriends?? The love that push you all to suicide and crime?

I meet you again Sire
You know that at times we over exaggerate thing's.
Family's love bla bla bla
Exceptional superficial bond yen yen yen
And when someone gets shockers like this from them because of the well over exaggerated sayings,not all of them get the strength to see beyond it.
In as much as these hurtful approach is not the only way,no one has the right to make excuses for people's families.
It's not the only way.
Family isn't the only superficial,over freaking exaggerated exclusive enigmatic bonding there is.
They're just humans like you and I sharing the same blood whatever from the same household.
Understand that they're not beyond irrational and hurtful behaviours.
You'll be alright
Please give your family members a breathing space, they're only humans
All these can be expected.

HeRulesMen:
The moment the money you had left you, respect from friends and family members also left.

Not true,pray for parents with sense.
Reason I love my mother to death.There's no replacement or competition to N.F.M.

yanabasee:


Let the op go and be waiting for motivational speeches from his parents before he will move on like a man and start up....

His claim is that he did everything to his parents and should be accepted back as a lazy young man for as long as he desires ...

Lol... My self esteem pushed me into making it large in life and right now, I will never go broke... I have properties... I am into real estate...

My parents made me to understand that I needed to stand up and never to see home as a place to always run back if I fail... but to keep pushing... She told me that she won't be here forever and where do I think I will run to when she's gone? I was starved of food from my beloved mother.... Do I hate my mother... NO, do I support her, yes...

Did your parents pushed you to the point of taking your life? I think you should read his accounts again. No doubt people make it in life after going through rough paths. However, people also make it big after getting help from family and friends. We are not all the same.

T0T0fucker:
2019 I own a car, lived in my own house fed for myself and support my family.
but life happened, 2021 I was forced back to my parents house in the creeks, since then they the ones supporting me.

but what I noticed this year is that, they want to kill me with talk.
comparing me with other children, using my flaws to curse me up and down.

it's like the once bread winner of the familie became a sand and ants in their eyes.

back then 2018, everything I had I took it for granted.
my financial freedom I took it for granted, right now I got tears in my eyes.


my parent' literally killing my self esteem....yes I try to be strong by quarreling with them sometimes but deep down I feel the pain within me.

I that use to buy bag of rice for the family, droping 20k every week for them.
but now am reduced to nothing...

So you don't know that once you can't afford to keep your home or parents, you will be subjected to all kind of humiliation

You made money earlier but you were just careless with it because you failed to plan

All you have them to eat then are in the soakaway so it's not relevance any longer

There are no better life I. The creek unless you want to be a useless militant

You need to move out of where they are and go to town to find your bearing

On the is second journey focus on how to establish yourself rather than spending on them to impress them

You are a man and you can't be under their roof forever

Your peers will see you as a no man

Lucrativress:

I meet you again Sire
You know that at times we over exaggerate thing's.
Family's love bla bla bla
Exceptional superficial bond yen yen yen
And when someone gets shockers like this from them because of the well over exaggerated sayings,not all of them get the strength to see beyond it.
In as much as these hurtful approach is not the only way,no one has the right to make excuses for people's families.
It's not the only way.
Family isn't the only superficial,over freaking exaggerated exclusive enigmatic bonding there is.
They're just humans like you and I sharing the same blood whatever from the same household.
Understand that they're not beyond irrational and hurtful behaviours.
You'll be alright
Please give your family members a breathing space, they're only humans
All these can be expected.

Absolutely. I agree with your view

T0T0fucker:
2019 I own a car, lived in my own house fed for myself and support my family.
but life happened, 2021 I was forced back to my parents house in the creeks, since then they the ones supporting me.

but what I noticed this year is that, they want to kill me with talk.
comparing me with other children, using my flaws to curse me up and down.

it's like the once bread winner of the familie became a sand and ants in their eyes.

back then 2018, everything I had I took it for granted.
my financial freedom I took it for granted, right now I got tears in my eyes.


my parent' literally killing my self esteem....yes I try to be strong by quarreling with them sometimes but deep down I feel the pain within me.

I that use to buy bag of rice for the family, droping 20k every week for them.
but now am reduced to nothing...

How did you lost it all? Were you duped or invest in a failed business? I will like to know if you wouldn't mind

HeRulesMen:
The moment the money you had left you, respect from friends and family members also left.

No be only money, even position and title. People only respect you for a reason.

yanabasee:


Get sense.....


You don't even appreciate the fact that they're trying to use words to push you back up?


If you get offended, get up and hustle.... Stop complaining... It's difficult to feed a grown up man...

Their fear could be that, you're over relaxing and might get used to it.. So go out and get something doing and appreciate them later ..

You don't expect them to keep feeding you.. This is Africa...

When I was struggling and went back home... my mum will talk to me and make me feel rejected.... I actually felt rejected and needed to be accepted and so I did everything and now I appreciate her for not letting me stay idle for too long ..

that's not d way to go about it bro,forget it what your mum did is bad u were just lucky to hit it quickly.

Imagine she keeps making u feel rejected n things never set,how will u feel?

To d op,just turn a thick skin n make sure u strife hard to get d best for yourself n don't forget God.

yanabasee:


Let the op go and be waiting for motivational speeches from his parents before he will move on like a man and start up....

His claim is that he did everything to his parents and should be accepted back as a lazy young man for as long as he desires ...

Lol... My self esteem pushed me into making it large in life and right now, I will never go broke... I have properties... I am into real estate...

My parents made me to understand that I needed to stand up and never to see home as a place to always run back if I fail... but to keep pushing... She told me that she won't be here forever and where do I think I will run to when she's gone? I was starved of food from my beloved mother.... Do I hate my mother... NO, do I support her, yes...

for your mother to starve u food shows d kind of family u are from,I wonder what she will do to another man's children.

Guy just lock up this matter cos it's opposite of what u understand.

Life is all about love n standing with people in times of there needs,anybody can b down any moment cos everything u have is borrowed so y not b with people when they needed u most?

U have to understand the difference between motivation n wickedness cos it's like u are substituting wickedness for motivation cos how can u justify denying someone food cos u believe it will.motivate him?

yanabasee:




I am more educated and more exposed than you and your entire generation....


You that is struggling to feed and survive... You that gets knocked on by your parents is calling me illiterate?


I think you deserve whatever treatment you're getting from your parents...

The fact that you contributed to your parents house doesn't count as an achievement.... Sending your siblings to school or supporting your mother to start up a business should be your responsibility as a member of that house.... You had every right not to contribute...


You don't have any problem over the words they're giving you... you have friends to go stay with... Infact, if you're having anything to do at the moment, you'd rented a place first and move out.... but because you're too lazy and too childish....

op abeg free this guy,he's from a dysfunctional family with a very warped mindset so don't blame him.

Op i was once in your shoes around 2019,I had a bet shop with over 500k on my terminal,the first thing that happened was that government took acquisition of the land n we were given quit notice just when i was trying to gather customers n spent a lot in d shop.

I managed to rent another shop close by again,that was when cult boys started their wahala in that area that u will hardly see a grown up guy waka anyhow so it became a no go area with many issues of robbery n co,so I cut my loss n move on after losing almost everything.

I moved back to my parents house to restrategise, stayed with them for 2 months n i got a 40k job which was nothing, I managed to move out n my mom supported me big time,she sent me money without asking, she never for once insulted me in all these,even when I bounced back n lost money to traveling scam,she didn't even for once insult me.

Atimes when she says she wants to see me,I go to her shop dressed well so she won't suspect I am managing, she would still order food for me n transfer money to.my account.

She showed me truly that no love like that of mother,even when many of my friends making it big time from fraud always want to come close,my mom will advice me n tell me d consequences of ill gotten wealth.

I thank God for my life today,though I am not yet there but it's a different ball game today n I thank God for the kind of mother I have cos if not for her I know say I go don commit by now.

Now I know why some guys kill,rob n do unthinkable things for money n end up in shit,it's cos they really don't have people to stand by them in trying times,people who.hold to hold them against all odds are d ones pushing them to do shit in d name of one useless motivation.

Imagine starving someone n calling it motivation,that's d height of it all n even your own son......haba.

What if u get pushed to d wall n go n rob then get killed?
What if u think of rituals n she's d one they want u to drop?
What if u embrace hard drugs due to frustration n become useless to her n even society at large?


Some people dey ooo