.

Ops, you are still young,endure a little more and listen to your father,he corrected you in love not as if he ask you to go and Rob.
Be patient with him and endure a little more.
I know sooner or later you will leave both your parents.
Just be patient for now.

Look for a responsible relative to stay with. Yeah I understand how important it is for parents to dictate some things in our lives but be reminded a time will come you will long for who to counsel and talk to you. If it's becoming unbearable move out of the house and get something doing if you are not in school. I perfectly understand your plight. Take it easy and commit everything to God in prayers.

Mine is a reverse case.

My mum gave me a very hard time back then and i was forced to park out, have'nt heard from her since two months nw and i don't regret it.

Iamfedup:
To begin with I am 22 years old this year and this man has been dictating my life ever since I was born............. He is not worthy to be called a father, imagine this man sent me and my mum out of the house at 9pm in a very silent street just because "I didn't barb my hair" and said stated that until I barb it I will not enter his house................It is not as if he is giving me any money for anything, my mother literally does everything in the house from feeding down to buying ordinary battery for wall clock, he prefers to drink and fornicate with anything that wears skirt just to say the least........I am just fed up I don't have any control over my life and don't know what to do anymore.

First thing I ask is,is there anything you can do about it?
He is whatever he is?
Have you tried reporting him to responsible elders?
If it hasn't worked
Is he overly aggressive?
If yes,then take it to the authorities,let Police threaten him so he can calm down.
They'll refrain him.
If he is not overly aggressive.
Then do just as he says if you have no other accomodation option.
He says barb your hair,then barb it.
He says do this,then do it so far it's within normal jurisdiction.
You'll be fine.
Do as he says till you have a better option.

Hmmm

I think you need to reconsider your stand and see everything from another perspective.

You see, when you get older and get to have your own family, your own kids that you will get to know what these parents really are, their thought patterns, fears and dreams.

What we didn't know is that these parents are just adult babies and they experience the same fears we fear only that theirs is more complicated because they have little children that look up to them. They make wrong decisions too yet it is not because they do not love us but because they are also learning how to raise children as they go about life.

Young man, your father as fearsome as he may look outwardly has his own fears too that he may not want you to experience. Once you have this knowledge that these people are just adult babies with their fears, dreams and aspirations who don't know it all yet they are trying to be the best at what they are to their children, things will become simple for you.

And you will be able to live with even a schizophrenic parent...

Just kidding with the schizophrenia part..

Many fathers are irresponsible.

Don't fade. Struggle to make the difference. You still need to make momma proud.

Except you are schooling or learning a trade, you need to work on yourself if you are still a full dependant at 22

You should be very careful how you address your father.... 22yrs old and you're already seeing your dad as a difficult man... Do know what life is out there?


You probably tinted your hair or barbed a crazy hairstyle and your mom saw nothing wrong with it ... But your dad is probably trying to redirect your step and you're citing this as dictatorship...

As far as you're staying under his roof, you should be willing to go by his rules and regulations..

Would have adviced you leave the house and look for a family member you feel free and comfortable around to stay with even if there's nothing for them to offer you there you can look for a job no matter how small it is to do for the main time but as time Goes on God will rewrite your story and favour will surely locate you but yet again if you leave how will your mother cope alone that's the issue? But if you feel she will be alright if you leave the you can follow this little advice "if you wish".

Hmmm,,, crazy things are happening,
Just be patient till you can afford to fend for yourself

PlayerMeji:
Hmmm
I think you need to reconsider your stand and see everything from another perspective.

You see, when you get older and get to have your own family, your own kids that you will get to know what these parents really are, their thought patterns, fears and dreams.

What we didn't know is that these parents are just adult babies and they experience the same fears we fear only that theirs is more complicated because they have little children that look up to them. They make wrong decisions too yet it is not because they do not love us but because they are also learning how to raise children as they go about life.

Young man, your father as fearsome as he may look outwardly has his own fears too that he may not want you to experience. Once you have this knowledge that these people are just adult babies with their fears, dreams and aspirations who don't know it all yet they are trying to be the best at what they are to their children, things will become simple for you.

And you will be able to live with even a schizophrenic parent...

Just kidding with the schizophrenia part..

Are you also kidding with your asking the OP to try to see this from a different perspective?

Iamfedup:
To begin with I am 22 years old this year and this man has been dictating my life ever since I was born............. He is not worthy to be called a father, imagine this man sent me and my mum out of the house at 9pm in a very silent street just because "I didn't barb my hair" and said stated that until I barb it I will not enter his house................It is not as if he is giving me any money for anything, my mother literally does everything in the house from feeding down to buying ordinary battery for wall clock, he prefers to drink and fornicate with anything that wears skirt just to say the least........I am just fed up I don't have any control over my life and don't know what to do anymore.

Your mother chooses to endure with him and so there isn't much you can do about the situation as is.

Bide your time and focus on building yourself so you can get out of the house when you are able to and also take the lessons you have learned so you can be a better father to your own children.

Not kidding about that...

Kobojunkie:
Are you also kidding with your asking the OP to try to see this from a different perspective?

PlayerMeji:
Not kidding about that...

So you conveniently ignored the OP'S story of his family so you can instead push your disconnected take at him?,

He complained that his father kicked him and his mother, who foots most of the bills in the house, out into the streets because he needed a haircut yet you conveniently ignore that citing schizophrenia or whatever.

He also complained his father is a drunk and cheats on his mother, yet you ignore it. What part of the above is this adult baby you ask the OP to consider?

I really hope it's not your mom who has been feeding you with lies about your dad, he is not responsible and your mother had stuck around for over 22 years, so many mothers tend to win their children's heart by telling fake lies about their husband young man, you better use your head so you No go because of your father enter hell

The man has said his father is a drunkard and does nothing for the home except make unreasonable demands while sleeping around and some people are here trying to make it normal, like every father does it or like they were raised by drunkards and irresponsible dads.

Watch them blame your mother who is the breadwinner. They will say she opened the drink and fed it to him and possibly drove him to the arms of his co fornicators.

When a person is addicted to drink, nothing else matters, they don't even care about themselves not to talk of other people. I hope he gets help and turns around.

Good luck Op,it is hard but hopefully something works out for you.If you have relatives ready to shelter you, go to them. Your mother has made her choice, nothing you can do about it.

Olumighty123:
I really hope it's not your mom who has been feeding you with lies about your dad, he is not responsible and your mother had stuck around for over 22 years, so many mothers tend to win their children's heart by telling fake lies about their husband young man, you better use your head so you No go because of your father enter hell

His mother is the reason why OP is mad that his mother, along with his person, where kicked out in to the night from a home where the mother foots much of the bills?

His mother is to blame for his father's life of drunkenness and fornication?

Op I pray make God intervene in your family matter.

Iamfedup:
To begin with I am 22 years old this year and this man has been dictating my life ever since I was born............. He is not worthy to be called a father, imagine this man sent me and my mum out of the house at 9pm in a very silent street just because "I didn't barb my hair" and said stated that until I barb it I will not enter his house................It is not as if he is giving me any money for anything, my mother literally does everything in the house from feeding down to buying ordinary battery for wall clock, he prefers to drink and fornicate with anything that wears skirt just to say the least........I am just fed up I don't have any control over my life and don't know what to do anymore.

When una hear him papa side all of una go shock.
You live by the rules of whom you stay in his house.
If you can’t live by the rules silently move out .

Kobojunkie:
His mother is the reason why OP is mad that his mother, along with his person, where kicked out in to the night from a home where the mother foots much of the bills?

His mother is to blame for his father's life of drunkenness and fornication?

You can't be so sure bro, there's always two sides to a story, hear him papa side first before you judge. Women can be very tricky you know?

Olumighty123:
You can't be so sure bro, there's always two sides to a story, hear him papa side first before you judge. Women can be very tricky you know?

Two sides of a story... he is the child of the marriage, not the husband or wife in the marriage. A 22-year old man is here telling you of his experiences with his father but you reject it all so you can blame his mother... anyways...no point.

Who knows the weird hair you are carrying?
All these portable and Naira Marley mentees.

When you move out you can keep it but at home stick to his rules.

Kobojunkie:
Two sides of a story... he is the child of the marriage, not the husband or wife in the marriage. A 22-year old man is here telling you of his experiences with his father but you reject it all so you can blame his mother... anyways...no point.

Haba, point out where I blamed the mother, all I did was assumed, which may eventually be what is really going on. Mind you, when someone has been brainwashed about you, there's absolutely nothing you can do to win that person's heart. It is what it is. If you are married, just pray your wife doesn't come between you and your kids.

Iamfedup:
To begin with I am 22 years old this year and this man has been dictating my life ever since I was born............. He is not worthy to be called a father, imagine this man sent me and my mum out of the house at 9pm in a very silent street just because "I didn't barb my hair" and said stated that until I barb it I will not enter his house................It is not as if he is giving me any money for anything, my mother literally does everything in the house from feeding down to buying ordinary battery for wall clock, he prefers to drink and fornicate with anything that wears skirt just to say the least........I am just fed up I don't have any control over my life and don't know what to do anymore.

You have a job to do here to free yourself from that man

Study hard get admission or go and learn a skill

With this you won't be seeing him all the time

Any man that behaves the way you just describe him will definitely suffer at old age because he did not plant the seed of love in you

As for your mother, she will be fine soon all she needs is your love and support, she must have been through hardship

Olumighty123:
I really hope it's not your mom who has been feeding you with lies about your dad, he is not responsible and your mother had stuck around for over 22 years, so many mothers tend to win their children's heart by telling fake lies about their husband young man, you better use your head so you No go because of your father enter hell

Loool because a 22 year old is a toddler that can't see what's going on around him abi,

Fake lies indeed.

You people should call out bullshit when you see it.

Nairaland boys- If a child calls a father irresponsible then it's the mother feeding him with lies, he can't see or feels abi, or is it the mother feeding him with lies about his womanizing. They must sha blame the mother for the fathers indiscretions.

So because she stuck of for 22 years makes what he's saying a lie abi.


They can't even call the father out for his indiscretions.

He chased both him and the mother out because of the haircut, why not just tell the boy to cut it with scissors if there's no barber around.
What if the mother had even told him to cut the hair but he didn't listen sef and the best way to be a father is to chase both mama and pikin out instead of doing the needful.

Your mom married him, got pregnant for him, and still chooses to endure with him. It's not your fault that you have an "irresponsible" father. The good thing is, if your mom won't leave him for reasons best known to her, you do have a choice to leave at some point.

Until then, just find a way to endure and develop a shock absorber against the toxicity in that house. So long as you need your parents to feed you and clothe you, there isn't much you can do. Find a way to deal with the issues until you're fit enough to rent an apartment.

Olumighty123:
I really hope it's not your mom who has been feeding you with lies about your dad, he is not responsible and your mother had stuck around for over 22 years, so many mothers tend to win their children's heart by telling fake lies about their husband young man, you better use your head so you No go because of your father enter hell

So many mothers indeed.

You guys will always find a way to blame the woman in practically everything. A 22 year old man is complaining about the way his father treats him and you managed to find a way to channel the blame towards his mother instead. Is the OP a baby? Why don't you guys ever call a spade a spade? Disgusting.

.

.

Iamfedup:
This Was the hairstyle o

Personally, I don't see this as a bad hairstyle....., But if he says you should cut it down, then try to do so... Don't drag your mother into it.. Allow her to enjoy her marriage. Don't look at your father's inability to provide for the house .. See him as the father and as the head. Because sooner or later, you will be in his position as well... And you wouldn't want your kids to speak ill of you when you try to correct them.

Sorry for you bro...

But this is one of those cases.

Your mum caused it all, ask her yourself. And be strict with her when asking her.

Ask your mother how she married your father, the events that happened, how did they meet and anything at all.

You will be shocked at the Revelation.