jeff1993:
Sad

Please NL family .... I need someone who can mentor me on any online skill

Check this out

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ImaIma1:


You are still the ones that will ask what she is bringing to the table. How are you sure that she's the one that pushed for a job? Have you thought of the fact that they might need the money to support her husband?

Why are some of you guys so bias towards women, so quick to label them the fault bearer.

And what is wrong in being a career mum? There's nothing wrong with crèches. It has saved families since time immemorial. Do you know if you were kept in a crèche?

Most of you unmarried ones are the ones throwing shades like everyone's situation is a perfect one. Get married and run all yours by textbook.

I am talking from experience pls don't defend nonesense. 3 months old baby don't have any business with creche. It is better to find a good nani if the work is mouth watering otherwise, find better thing do with your life.

showafrica:


I am talking from experience pls don't defend nonesense. 3 months old baby don't have any business with creche. It is better to find a good nani if the work is mouth watering otherwise, find better thing do with your life.

A good nanny? Nannies that are kidnapping babies everyday. Some people will also tell you that a 3month old does not have any business with a nanny.A crèche is a preferred option for many.

And I'm not defending "nonsense", I'm also talking from experience. How many months is maternity leave? I have seen younger babies in a Crèche.

If the mother didn't have to work, do you think she would be happy to drop her baby? Many of these women need the job.

What you should be condemning and advocating for is a longer maternity leave for nursing mothers. If we had a ebetter system in this country, would mothers have to rush back to work?

ImaIma1:


A good nanny? Nannies that are kidnapping babies everyday. Some people will also tell you that a 3month old does not have any business with a nanny.A crèche is a preferred option for many.

And I'm not defending "nonsense", I'm also talking from experience. How many months is maternity leave? I have seen younger babies in a Crèche.

If the mother didn't have to work, do you think she would be happy to drop her baby? Many of these women need the job.

What you should be condemning and advocating for is a longer maternity leave for nursing mothers. If we had a ebetter system in this country, would mothers have to rush back to work?

You quote me where i stated all these. If the husband pushed her to slave work no problem, both bears the consequence of there actions and, i am saying it is not the right decision. . However, my point is a lot of women detest been house wife and I don't understand what they meant. You have been jobless and immediately you get married you start shouting I can't be a housewife at the expense of a new born. Why not start a business that will allow you nurse all your children for at least 5yrs before talking about 8 to 6 job. However, if the guy decides to marry a working class from the onset then, the gold digger should have made a better plan for a 3 month old baby. However, you look at, it is wrong to leave a 3 months old baby in the hands of strangers. (failed parenting)

showafrica:


You quote me where i stated all these. If the husband pushed her to slave work no problem, both bears the consequence of there actions and, i am saying it is not the right decision. . However, my point is a lot of women detest been house wife and I don't understand what they meant. You have been jobless and immediately you get married you start shouting I can't be a housewife at the expense of a new born. Why not start a business that will allow you nurse all your children for at least 5yrs before talking about 8 to 6 job. However, if the guy decides to marry a working class from the onset then, the gold digger should have made a better plan for a 3 month old baby. However, you look at, it is wrong to leave a 3 months old baby in the hands of strangers. (failed parenting)

Look at Nairaland for instance...how many men in this current economy can afford to work alone while the wife stays home? Do you think it is that easy to get money to start a business. You are talking about an ideal situation.

An ideal situation is that her mum or mum inlaw will come and stay 6months while the wife resumes work. Not everyone has that privilege. What if she's an orphan and her mum inlaw cannot stay longer than a month?

I didn't have to take my babies to the creche that early but I do understand what other mums are going through. I look around me and observe that not everyone might have it easy.

You obviously see things only from your perspective, every other way is wrong according to you. Open your eyes and mind to the reality of the world around you.

The sacrifices they make to make to be away from their babies might be necessary. That is not failed parenting.

ImaIma1:


Look at Nairaland for instance...how many men in this current economy can afford to work alone while the wife stays home? Do you think it is that easy to get money to start a business. You are talking about an ideal situation.

An ideal situation is that her mum or mum inlaw will come and stay 6months while the wife resumes work. Not everyone has that privilege. What if she's an orphan and her mum inlaw cannot stay longer than a month?

I didn't have to take my babies to the creche that early but I do understand what other mums are going through. I look around me and observe that not everyone might have it easy.

You obviously see things only from your perspective, every other way is wrong according to you. Open your eyes and mind to the reality of the world around you.

The sacrifices they make to make to be away from their babies might be necessary. That is not failed parenting.

Yes, this is how we adapt even the worst way of life. The reality on ground is the product of our wrong doings in the past. If you were able and I was able then it means its possible. As far as its the right thing, no sacrifice is big enough for the right thing. I am advising the younger ones here not to go that way of dropping a new born with a stranger but you are trying to make it look like thats what the society demands at the moment. It is not my dear, there is a better option. If you look at our society, you will see failed parenting written all over the place and this case is one of it. Lets think outside the box, there are better options. At worst, if possible have all your children during the university. At least, to go to lecture is not by force.

Lmao. Are we still on this matter? All this Shalaye started because one random lady said her friend lost her baby in a creche. Many cases of babies dying with mothers, mothers in law or nannies and the same hypocrites will just waka pass like nothing happened. Abeg everybody should rest, to every mallam his own kettle - do what works for you and move the fukk on no need to shove your own opinion down another person's throat.

showafrica:


Yes, this is how we adapt even the worst way of life. The reality on ground is the product of our wrong doings in the past. If you were able and I was able then it means its possible. As far as its the right thing, no sacrifice is big enough for the right thing. I am advising the younger ones here not to go that way of dropping a new born with a stranger but you are trying to make it look like thats what the society demands at the moment. It is not my dear, there is a better option. If you look at our society, you will see failed parenting written all over the place and this case is one of it. Lets think outside the box, there are better options. At worst, if possible have all your children during the university. At least, to go to lecture is not by force.

What are the options? Mention some.

Me and you not doing it does not qualify the thousands that didn't have our opportunities/situation.

Do people have power over when they fall in love, get married, etc. How then can you say they should have their kids while in university? You are really funny. You see why I say you live in an ideal situation.

Everyone needs help. Crèches were created to fill in that gap that has been left open by the inadequacies in our system.

If you step out of your comfort zone, you will see how people are struggling to manage kids with work. But you prefer to be judgemental based on your own life situation and to be rigid in your mindset. You live in a bubble and do not have the ability to empathize.

Allow the "failed parents" continue in their "failed parenting". You will be fine.

ImaIma1:


What are the options? Mention some.

Me and you not doing it does not qualify the thousands that didn't have our opportunities/situation.

Do people have power over when they fall in love, get married, etc. How then can you say they should have their kids while in university? You are really funny. You see why I say you live in an ideal situation.

Everyone needs help. Crèches were created to fill in that gap that has been left open by the inadequacies in our system.

If you step out of your comfort zone, you will see how people are struggling to manage kids with work. But you prefer to be judgemental based on your own life situation and to be rigid in your mindset. You live in a bubble and do not have the ability to empathize.

Allow the "failed parents" continue in their "failed parenting". You will be fine.

In order words, allow status quo (failed parenting) remain? Well, you just want to live for today, I understand.

showafrica:


In order words, allow status quo (failed parenting) remain? Well, you just want to live for today, I understand.

Obviously you have no other options. Therefore, no solution. You can only offer judgement.

When you have a solution for them, come back and profer it. Till then, your opinion is inconsequential.

ImaIma1:


Obviously you have no other options. Therefore, no solution. You can only offer judgement.

When you have a solution for them, come back and profer it. Till then, your opinion is inconsequential.

Ok your solution was not intentional, probably by force?

elantraceey:


That's why one should get married to a responsible man not a boy. If you as a man cannot single handedly cater for your family for at least a year, then you really have no business getting married. Some bad deals are avoidable, to be honest.

I took time to read through your comments on this thread... Your orientation and mindset is quite commendable 👍🏾👍🏾👍🏾.

I want to think you're a "class act" in this school of thought.