JovialJune:



I don't care about your point, all you guys know and cry about is sex sex and more sex, does emotional weakness automatically mean sex? It's like you need Google and dictionary to define emotional weakness to you

Op clearly shows he is emotionally weak by crying and assuming what hasn't even been told to him yet, he quickly came to nairaland to complain and seek validations from nuisances like you just to create problems for his young marriage, yet you daft human with a -0 IQ chose to gallivant on my comment,

It is not my fault if the danging saggy schlong between your legs sums up emotions for you to hyperventilate on sèx cos it clearly defines and sums up the purpose of your life and achievement, it still did not cancel the fact that MEN ARE EMOTIONALLY WEAK, everything you do centers on and display high level of WEAKNESS,

If you hurts you that I pointed out this basic fact about men, go off yourself.

Dominickhune:



Wo.. Am not of the view to compare between man and woman who emotionally weak goor...
And then I am not emotional weak oo or crying my friend.. We are very much cool self... Even sincerely we had some rounds self. After I asked her. Its past.. No come here dey talk say I dey emotional weak.. This is how you all will be thinking that not telling him is the best because he go react or vex or just like you said divorce if he find out not knowing you are actually making it worst.
You don come here dey talk say I dey emotional weak and crying.. I brought up a topic.. Of debate..

JovialJune:


Oga go and solve your marriage problems, no dey shalaye for us here, either you talk to your wife to see reasons why she shouldn't keep anything from you, or you lock up,

Your choice, your problem.

JovialJune:


You brought up a topic for debate? Seriously? Not like you're having issues and need advice? Just imagine smh....

I'm done here.

JovialJune:



I don't care about your point, all you guys know and cry about is sex sex and more sex, does emotional weakness automatically mean sex? It's like you need Google and dictionary to define emotional weakness to you

Op clearly shows he is emotionally weak by crying and assuming what hasn't even been told to him yet, he quickly came to nairaland to complain and seek validations from nuisances like you just to create problems for his young marriage, yet you daft human with a -0 IQ chose to gallivant on my comment,

It is not my fault if the danging saggy schlong between your legs sums up emotions for you to hyperventilate on sèx, it still did not cancel the fact that MEN ARE EMOTIONALLY WEAK, everything you do centers on and display high level of WEAKNESS, you guys can murder your woman if she so much as talk to another man, that is how WEAK you are,

If you hurts you that I pointed out this basic fact about men, go off yourself.

McDuncan:


I barely could piece together the incomprehensible gilberish you wrote, interspersed with emotionally-induced grammatical bloopers.

Your punctuations are incompliant with the standard expected from someone with the basic intellect required to engage in an enlightened discuss. It leaves me with no choice other than to conclude you're a gutter-bred bìtch with the poise of a street urchin.

Your post is clear, you don't need to re-explain. You're just an insincere bîtch. If you weren't swapping pen for dicks in your school days, you definitely would have sounded more educated or a bit more polished in your literal presentation.

McDuncan:


I barely could piece together the incomprehensible gilberish you wrote, interspersed with emotionally-induced grammatical bloopers.

Your punctuations are incompliant with the standard expected from someone with the basic intellect required to engage in an enlightened discuss. It leaves me with no choice other than to conclude you're a gutter-bred bìtch with the poise of a street urchin.

Your post is clear, you don't need to re-explain. You're just an insincere bîtch. If you weren't swapping pen for dicks in your school days, you definitely would have sounded more educated or a bit more polished in your literal presentation.

JovialJune:


Fvck off from my mention...... schmuck.

McDuncan:


Not when your agenda here is peddling of falsehood and the obvious hate of men.

Going back to the roots of your paronoia may well provide clues to your being a rampaging bîtch who pollutes the cyberspace with her toxic fumes.

Broken dreams?
Heartbreaks?
Serial relationship disappointments?

Perhaps all of the above are causative factors that have rendered you this self-destructive misandrist.

Richy4:


One thing I noticed in life is that we humans are different and we think differently...

I should let u know where the past belong.. the past belongs in the dustbin of history... And when you start rummaging the dustbin, u find unpleasant junks..

In my school of thought, I don't need such information because it won't add value to our relationship... besides everyone got a past...the day u said I do was the day u let go of your past...and started a future will your spouse.

If u were eager to know, it should've been a topic during courtship.. since there was no topic like that while courting, just thrash it...As long as everything remain in the past, I'm good..

I don't just like to stress myself for nothing... that's why humans are wired differently...
Wetin I wan take the info do?.. Abi I go divorce her after knowing just because she dated my friend?......
Besides if it's true she dated her,.. What will I do to my friend? Confront him over relationship that happened long before she met me or do I start avoiding him because of his past with my wife? .. My brother to let sleeping dogs relax sure pass

JOACHINpedro:

What if she had a baby elsewhere?
Some past can shape the future

JovialJune:



Dude I'm tired of arguing with you, leave me alone with my misandry and whatever nonsense your little brain concorted, just get lost....pls

McDuncan:
long after the party, long after he's gone, you're left to do the clean up alone.

JovialJune:
Men are weak and very emotional beings, ladies have no problem with who their boyfriend/husband's had sex with, but if reverse is the case, you'd see men hyperventilating, yapping spittle everywhere, wailing non stop as if they've been betrayed and their lives have been cut short,


Oga Op what exactly do you want to know, that your wife had an affair and had sex with your friend? Oya yes she had sex with him, sheybi that's what your mind is telling you abi? Yes it happened, so what do you want to do about it? divorce her right? Do that now, you'd finally have peace of mind abi....

All these immature adults getting married these days sef

Richy4:

In my opinion , There are things/ issues that prospective couples talks about during courtship... So that when that issue comes up accidentally in future during marriage, it won't be an issues because it has been sorted out during courtship..

Example... The issue of babies... Mental illness... Health issues... previously date/ relationship with father/ mother or brother/sister of the partners involved.. etc..

This kind of example needs adequate communication...and if the couple cannot find ways around it, they can call it off...U can't hide such past from someone that u claimed to love.. No good individual can hide such from a partner...

But as u can see, OP's case is different.. because the wife never knew that the guy was in the picture as one of the husband's friends...

cococandy:


You don’t clean up after?

The things some of you brag about. Eww

McDuncan:


And you must have come away with the understanding that 'clean up' is the application of water and tissue.

Simplistically naive of you!

JOACHINpedro:

Well, you can't rule out the fact that some people can be mischevious esp for selfish interest. Some guys will hide their erectile dysfunction problem so as to marry without hindrance, I've also seen cases where the woman hid the existence of her son just to be married off. Something similar happened to me but what was her defence? "You didn't ask"
So my bro, the rule is there but like I said before people can be diabolically manipulative. I pity this op cus he won't be able to see "the girl he married" as he used to until he satisfy his curiosity.

A woman hiding the identity of her son just to let married is deception... I see it as a breach of promise...I will never trust her again should I find myself in such situations..

As I said earlier, children situations in the past should be talked about during courtship... I mean that's the reason for that ( to know the person u are marrying both character and all). It was not really on the same league with OP's situation...

cococandy:


That’s not the come back you think it is

Richy4:

A woman hiding the identity of her son just to let married is deception... I see it as a breach of promise...I will never trust her again should I find myself in such situations..

As I said earlier, children situations in the past should be talked about during courtship... I mean that's the reason for that ( to know the person u are marrying both character and all). It was not really on the same league with OP's situation...

Dominickhune:
I have heard you all.. But the truth is that no matter the answer she gives me.. It will bring no bearing to the present.. But let's tell ourself the realistic truth.. I need to know.. Because it was past but we were confronted with it in our future(by the girl finding out she is my friend) . So she had to be straight..

In my perception.. Mens have EGO.. and sometimes to protect our Ego.. We need to know some certain things.. Now let me put it like this now.. If my friend mistakenly made statement like them both in the future. Definatly I will defined my wife in front of me.. But tell me the impression.. The impression will definatly be different from me getting to know it from my wife than from the guy.


To the guy saying if I had have sex in the past that I am definatly no different. That its past .. Wo. I dey even Bleep ashawo self before I hands down getting married and since then I stopped.. But I told all this about everything without leaving stone untouched.. Even when I was toasting her.. I got to found out that her friend I once toasted her thou I did not bleeped her.. I told my wife everything about it...wo.. Imagine.. I even told her and showed her one girl I had something with in the past on our wedding when I surprising saw her in the wedding

We are all progressing.. But my opinion is that when you are married, you won't talk about all your past because definatly I did not tell her anything .. Because of you want a safety marriage.. But when you are confronted about it.. We have to be open..
Because leaving him hanging ain't the best

Abeg no insults in reply

realtalk19:


Hope you can take and handle her past maturely without judging her the way she did with yours? If not forget about it and don't hear what you will use against her for life except you are looking for reasons to hold against your wife. Everyone has a past

Dominickhune:



Nice point here.. The fact here is that I can take anything as far say na past.. Because me kwa my past is bloody.. Whats else could possibly be in the past that is necessary when she is hiv free and she has given birth for me.. This na the two important thing for me na.. So anything past no concern me.. Na abortion ni? I Don do that one before and I told her, na ashawo ni.. I Don do that one too and I told her.. Shey na going to babalowo.. I Don tell am that one too self.. All this na past and she was told.. So I deserve to know her past too especially when it's confronted like this..

Na girls just get this kind character in them..
They go just dey keep secrets anyhow anyhow.. Even necessary one..
They said in marriage no secrets.. But like they said that if you toast a girl without lieng you no go get the girl.. The same way that without secrets in marriage, it won't last.. But does that breaks the fact that lie is lie.. Or secrets is bad in marriagr

Dominickhune:
There is this girl I have been married with for one year plus now.. One day we decided to go for a vacation to abuja.. In the vacation she met some of my friends..we sat down together friends things.. Some of my friends are still single.. On our way back.. She told me that one of my single friend face is familiar.. I asked her more about it and she said that she does not remeber what transpired between them both but she was certain that the guy once toasted her in school..(we all schooled in the same school)... I then told her that she should be open that it's a thing of the past but she kept insisting that she does not remember.. She told me.. Its a thing of the past that we are married now and that we should focus about the marriage.. And I was telling her.. Yes.. That is true.. But I need to know about her past when confronted and everything.. That she needs to tell me the truth.. But she kept insisting that she does not remeber.. We had this to an argument that she told me to go and ask my guy..

Now what would you. Advice us? Because I am of the opinion that the past matters when confronted with it.. But she was like it does not matter..

Please.. No one is perfect.. We are all progressing..need suggestion and advice

OlawaleBammie:
If u dont want to hate her, ur marriage and ur kids just forget about her past, so far she's performing her wifely duties well den forget,
Talking from experience bro.... Plsssssss.