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If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? - Family - Nairaland

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If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by forMom(f): 11:28pm On Aug 05, 2022
Forgive me but I have a strong attachment to my father's name.

Not because I detest my fiance's name or anything like that. No, not at all. But because I feel like my father's name is my identity.
To think I'll let go of my identity just like that after marriage is distressing embarassed.

Besides, my surname sounds so lovely whenever it's mentioned. In fact, because of that, I love being called by my full name.

I've mentioned this to my fiance a few times but he doesn't understand lol .
Honestly, if I had a choice, I would not change my surname after marriage smiley.

So ladies if it wasn't a thing, would you take your husband's name after marriage?

1 Like

Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by Paramount01(m): 11:33pm On Aug 05, 2022
forMom:
Forgive me but I have a strong attachment to my father's name.

Not because I detest my fiance's name or anything like that. No, not at all. But because I feel like my father's name is my identity.
To think I'll let go of my identity just like that after marriage is distressing embarassed.

Besides, my surname sounds so lovely whenever it's mentioned. In fact, because of that, I love being called by my full name.

I've mentioned this to my fiance a few times but he doesn't understand lol .
Honestly, if I had a choice, I would not change my surname after marriage smiley.

So ladies if it wasn't a thing, would you take your husband's name after marriage?



If he can't understand your point then separate now

1 Like

Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by forMom(f): 11:43pm On Aug 05, 2022
Paramount01:




If he can't understand your point then separate now
Separate ke shocked shocked
It's not that serious.

1 Like

Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by Haakeem(m): 11:46pm On Aug 05, 2022
Is your father name tinubu?
I want to check something.
Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by libertyfather(m): 12:26am On Aug 06, 2022
I dont care, I'm not ur father
Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by henmaris: 7:48am On Aug 06, 2022
Married for 9years now and still bearing my father's name. I did not change my name and never would.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by forMom(f): 10:20am On Aug 06, 2022
henmaris:
Married for 9years now and still bearing my father's name. I did not change my name and never would.
Wow shocked
How did you do it?
Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by folake4u(f): 11:04am On Aug 06, 2022
forMom:
Forgive me but I have a strong attachment to my father's name.

Not because I detest my fiance's name or anything like that. No, not at all. But because I feel like my father's name is my identity.
To think I'll let go of my identity just like that after marriage is distressing embarassed.

Besides, my surname sounds so lovely whenever it's mentioned. In fact, because of that, I love being called by my full name.

I've mentioned this to my fiance a few times but he doesn't understand lol .
Honestly, if I had a choice, I would not change my surname after marriage smiley.

So ladies if it wasn't a thing, would you take your husband's name after marriage?

I also have this same mindset as you. I love my father's name too.

I once told my Father I'd love to keep his name if I get married, he said it'd cause wahala. grin

Although, I've seen lots of women that kept their surname after marriage and their husbands didn't have a problem with that.

1 Like

Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by culf: 11:15am On Aug 06, 2022
forMom:
Forgive me but I have a strong attachment to my father's name.

Not because I detest my fiance's name or anything like that. No, not at all. But because I feel like my father's name is my identity.
To think I'll let go of my identity just like that after marriage is distressing embarassed.

Besides, my surname sounds so lovely whenever it's mentioned. In fact, because of that, I love being called by my full name.

I've mentioned this to my fiance a few times but he doesn't understand lol .
Honestly, if I had a choice, I would not change my surname after marriage smiley.

So ladies if it wasn't a thing, would you take your husband's name after marriage?

some men don't care I know lots of people that are married for years without changing name. the problem is when you want to travel out with your kid(s) I know someone that her visa application was turndown because her name and that of the kids are different.
Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by Smile4mee01: 11:40am On Aug 06, 2022
Intresting, do as you please.

You remind of feminist who claim women must be given jobs at top levels dominated by men but fail to keep the same energy seeking jobs at low level jobs likebrick laying, , drivers k, trades ppl also dominated by men.

If your husband was going to be a president/governor, hope you keep this same.energy.

Good luck.

1 Like

Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by demoBaba: 1:27pm On Aug 06, 2022
forMom:

Wow shocked
How did you do it?


You're asking her... don't follow her steps please, nah she b Oga at home.
Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by forMom(f): 1:29pm On Aug 06, 2022
folake4u:


I also have this same mindset as you. I love my father's name too.

I once told my Father I'd love to keep his name if I get married, he said it'd cause wahala. grin

Although, I've seen lots of women that kept their surname after marriage and their husbands didn't have a problem with that.
Finally seen my kind.
Now I'm wondering why I haven't met any woman that didn't change her surname after marriage lol.

2 Likes

Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by forMom(f): 1:30pm On Aug 06, 2022
culf:


some men don't care I know lots of people that are married for years without changing name. the problem is when you want to travel out with your kid(s) I know someone that her visa application was turndown because her name and that of the kids are different.
Hmmm. Now this is a thing!
Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by forMom(f): 1:39pm On Aug 06, 2022
Smile4mee01:
Intresting, do as you please.

You remind of feminist who claim women must be given jobs at top levels dominated by men but fail to keep the same energy seeking jobs at low level jobs likebrick laying, , drivers k, trades ppl also dominated by men.

If your husband was going to be a president/governor, hope you keep this same.energy.

Good luck.

I don't see how my post relates to your analogy sir. This is not even a feminist thing to start with.

2 Likes

Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by folake4u(f): 2:40pm On Aug 06, 2022
forMom:

Finally seen my kind.
Now I'm wondering why I haven't met any woman that didn't change her surname after marriage lol.


Lol. There are many women who didn't change their surnames after marriage. cheesy

It all boils down to preference anyways.

1 Like

Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by Mindlog: 4:33pm On Aug 06, 2022
culf:


some men don't care I know lots of people that are married for years without changing name. the problem is when you want to travel out with your kid(s) I know someone that her visa application was turndown because her name and that of the kids are different.

Which embassy?

1 Like

Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by culf: 8:44pm On Aug 06, 2022
Mindlog:


Which embassy?

I didn't asked her which embassy or probably forgotten, she told me when I saw her with newspaper publication trying to change her account information too in a hurry. According to her, they wanted traveling to meet Oga, but her request was rejected as they said she don't have evidence to show that the kids are her children because her name and info and that of the kids are different
Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by debbydams(f): 12:12pm On Aug 07, 2022
forMom:
Forgive me but I have a strong attachment to my father's name.

Not because I detest my fiance's name or anything like that. No, not at all. But because I feel like my father's name is my identity.
To think I'll let go of my identity just like that after marriage is distressing embarassed.

Besides, my surname sounds so lovely whenever it's mentioned. In fact, because of that, I love being called by my full name.

I've mentioned this to my fiance a few times but he doesn't understand lol .
Honestly, if I had a choice, I would not change my surname after marriage smiley.

So ladies if it wasn't a thing, would you take your husband's name after marriage?
my husband bears the same name with my dad

1 Like

Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by onegig(m): 1:05pm On Aug 07, 2022
culf:


some men don't care I know lots of people that are married for years without changing name. the problem is when you want to travel out with your kid(s) I know someone that her visa application was turndown because her name and that of the kids are different.
She didn't tell you the truth.

Probably she was divorced and didn't get the consent form from the other parent to travel with the kids. I am 110% sure she wasn't denied because of difference in the Surname.

Is her name not on their birth certificate?

Heck it's even a lot stressful for ladies who changed names. All your previous history, you have to go explain. Present marriage certificate, newspaper prints and whatnot just to authenticate your identity. I can not wrap my head why a lady would change her name. The hassle alone is enough turn off. But whatever works for people. Imagine you had to remarry? Lol. Affidavit for affidavit for affidavit of change of name? Why give yourself such headache ?

I am a guy and she definitely kept her surname. In some religion like Islam a Lady keeps her father's name. That is why you always have people referred to as "ibn"-son/daughter of. This taking husband name is western, I don't see references to such in most African culture that i am familiar with and honestly it is a lot inconvenient both from an identity perspective and a paperwork point of view. Maiden name... Like wtf...?

Her husband does not own her. She's a human not half human.


Edited..

1 Like 1 Share

Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by NoToPile: 1:48pm On Aug 07, 2022
onegig:

She didn't tell you the truth.

Probably she was divorced and didn't get the consent form from the other parent to travel with the kids. I am 110% sure she wasn't denied because of difference in the Surname.

Is her name not on their birth certificate?

Heck it's even a lot stressful for ladies who changed names. All your previous history, you have to go explain. Present marriage certificate, newspaper prints and whatnot just to authenticate your identity. I can not wrap my head why a lady would change her name. The hassle alone is enough turn off. But whatever works for people. Imagine you had to remarry? Lol. Affidavit for affidavit for affidavit of change of name? Why give yourself such headache ?

.

Lool the stuff is very stressful, thankfully it's s one off thing and there's provision for maiden name almost everywhere.

Affidavit
Newspaper
BVN
NIN
Passport
PVC

Change all the changeable, very tedious something. My friend just did/completed hers after 9 years of marriage.
Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by culf: 7:47pm On Aug 07, 2022
onegig:

She didn't tell you the truth.

Probably she was divorced and didn't get the consent form from the other parent to travel with the kids. I am 110% sure she wasn't denied because of difference in the Surname.

Is her name not on their birth certificate?

Heck it's even a lot stressful for ladies who changed names. All your previous history, you have to go explain. Present marriage certificate, newspaper prints and whatnot just to authenticate your identity. I can not wrap my head why a lady would change her name. The hassle alone is enough turn off. But whatever works for people. Imagine you had to remarry? Lol. Affidavit for affidavit for affidavit of change of name? Why give yourself such headache ?

I am a guy and she definitely kept her surname. In some religion like Islam a Lady keeps her father's name. That is why you always have people referred to as "ibn"-son/daughter of. This taking husband name is western, I don't see references to such in most African culture that i am familiar with and honestly it is a lot inconvenient both from an identity perspective and a paperwork point of view. Maiden name... Like wtf...?

Her husband does not own her. She's a human not half human.


Edited..


that's what she told me and she is not divorce, the visa application then was for her and the kids to go meet the guy outside
Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by Ndidi2: 9:53pm On Aug 07, 2022
henmaris:
Married for 9years now and still bearing my father's name. I did not change my name and never would.
OMG
Think say na only me..
Never will l change it.

Though people call me Mrs.....
But on paper Noooo.
Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by Ndidi2: 10:00pm On Aug 07, 2022
forMom:

Finally seen my kind.
Now I'm wondering why I haven't met any woman that didn't change her surname after marriage lol.
l de ur back o.

That is d last thing l will do.
Except for my kids' sake

My husband use to make jest say when l go change am e go tell for my body..
I go tell am say l de wait.
Re: If It Wasn't A Thing, Would You Take Your Husband's Name After Marriage? by forMom(f): 11:07pm On Aug 07, 2022
Ndidi2:
l de ur back o.

That is d last thing l will do.
Except for my kids' sake

My husband use to make jest say when l go change am e go tell for my body..
I go tell am say l de wait.

grin cheesy
The need to change the need may not come up since you've stayed this long without changing it.


debbydams:
my husband bears the same name with my dad
Awwnnn
So you just continued with your dad's surname kiss


Lalasticlala can more people see this please?

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