Klass99:


Believe me when I say some of us have learnt and are still learning. Someone once told me experience is not the best teacher, because experience is painful and if you don't learn the lesson the first time, life will take you through it over and over again until you learn.

He advised it is best to learn from other people's experience and stories, I took his advise to heart and it hasn't failed me yet. It was from him and some single mothers I learnt to disregard men who tell you to get pregnant first, then we'll proceed to the altar or the ones who tell you the surest way to marry is to get pregnant for your guy and once belle enter marriage go follow.They think all of us live and breathe for these two things only.

ahh, awesome! Learning from others mistakes saves one from painful experiences. I wish everyone will follow this path but then a lot are not. I know people that their marriage is not up to 3 years and the lady is running from one place to another, injections after another, player house to another and the funny part is the husband is not disturbing her, neither their parents. she won't listen to anything you tell her.

Honestly I don't believe that a guy that genuinely love a lady will ask her to get pregnant before marriage, that means the pregnancy is the only reason for the marriage (that is if at all the marriage proposal is true) so what happens after they stopped giving birth - end of marriage certainly. Most time those guys are not sincere, even after getting pregnant it will still not work. its unfortunate some people believe that marriage is just to produce children.
I have a neighbour that told me that after getting pregnant during dating, they quickly did traditional and the husband promise her white wedding after child birth. That baby is about 4 years now but no more wedding. Her dream of wearing a wedding gown is becoming like a mirage. insincere people everywhere

Klass99:




Your comments remind me of the hot radio talk show Sharing Life Issues with Chaz B, which the late Chaz B used to host.

One time he had a female guest on the show who narrated her sojourn for a baby/child as a married woman. I didn't catch her story from the beginning but she said she wasn't proud of herself for the things she had done and places she had been to, in her quest for a child as a believer/Christian.

I recall listening to her and silently praying that may I never be in a situation where I seek help from the devil for anything, not for a child, not for money etc. She felt so ashamed and embarrassed, she said she won't reveal all the details of what she'd done or where she'd been, on air.

That part of her story I remember clearly but my memory is a bit foggy though, as to whether she got the child or not. The studio phone lines were ringing off the hook that day and when they breaked for a commercial I tuned out and didn't keep up with the rest of her story.

I didn't know that was what killed Jennifer Okere Ossai ooo, but a quick Google search confirmed what

you said. Na wao.....

Imagine what she have to go through, she can't even say it on air, to tell you the level she had gone or what she had done. Naaaa! And some people still make this mistake, a lot of people really not just some, are still following that path. These days if a couple wants children desperately and can't wait, they are better ways to go about it but some won't even if they can afford it. God bless my bro with a child after 13years through IVF (second attempt though, first one failed), which to me is better than running from one place to another.
I pray people will be more enlightened and stop all these unnecessary pressures they are putting themselves through

...

The issue is different people go into marriage for different reasons and once they are not aligned, this is bound to happen.

Klass99:


Two of the single mothers I know personally were asked by their boyfriends/fiance to take in then they'll get married, one was pressured till she caved. The men walked away like Craig David's hit song I'm walking away, from the troubles in my life. Tell your neighbour to please rest that dream may never happen

kai, she for no gree! its mostly scam honestly. (your choice of song though.... funny). I believe that is what they wanted, a child but had to deceive the ladies to agree. I know a seniour guy back then over 15years ago that told me if he can see a Lady to give birth to 1 or 2 kids for him, he won't marry. his is sincere about his own, till date he is not married. its better to be open to the lady than lie to then, some won't even mind (its not everybody that wants marriage) Rather than shatter someone's dream because of selfish abi wickedness self.

for my neighbour, we are no longer that close like before, though its something she really want but the way it's going...I don't want to sound negative. They are even having serious issues now self. I earnestly pray God will help them to resolve their issues and bring her dream to fulfillment

Richy4:


The most annoying part is that the husband is happily married to another woman who probably must have given him so many kids.. life goes on..

Assuming she wasn't an actress, no one would have known that such lady actually walked on this planet..
Now imagine the number of women who must have gone just like her that no one remembers anymore...

She was way too beautiful and poised to end up like that honestly.. her death was one of those stupid death that made me thank God I wasn't born a woman.. (no disrespect intended... just me being me) It's just a crazy world

its annoying really. I don't know why but for some reasons, I happen to know quite a number of couple married for years without any baby yet. If you see how some of these ladies stress life out of themselves ehhh, not like anyone is pressurising them.
let me give you a funny one, a friend of mine, before marriage (though everything is set for marriage) was running from one place to another with fear, that all these years and during her courtship with her guy, she didn't take in for once, hmmmm come see fear. she was taking all manner of concoction, seeking help where they is none, person wey never marry self ooo. to cut long story short, in gave birth about a year into her marriage, just imagine.

Klass99:


Seven blessings to your brother for not putting his wife out or walking away. A couple in church tried for 20 years to have a child, there was nothing medically wrong with the man or woman, but they couldn't conceive naturally.

As the years went by and they grew older they turned to IVF, I think two attempts failed and the doctor asked them to stop as another attempt would be risky for the wife. They listened and stopped trying, then madam conceived naturally after one holy communion service.

What fascinated me about their testimony is how an Igbo man stood by his wife for 20 years, not allowing his ummuna or family to push him to divorce for another woman. I kept thinking to myself which kain Igbo man be this? I was tripped and impressed by him.

Amen oooo. for my bro, prayer houses or running around is a big NO. She won't even try it( unless secretly), he was very particular about that with her and supported her all through the way. Its Her own family that wanted to disturb but my bro didn't give them the opportunity to do so.

awesome. I have seen a couple that have their child after 27 years, my lecturer then. Patience with ones partner has nothing to do with tribe, afterall its none of their fault, even if one have problem, the other is suppose to stick by. onces their is genuine love between both parties, trust me, no one can come between them. I'm happy for them too, what God cannot do does not exist. we should appreciate the wife too, some would have gone out to give the man 4 to 5 bastards already, God forgive me ooo.

I love happy ending stories (testimonies) like this one.