Two days ago at the clinic I saw a case that was sad and funny at the same time. So after getting the patient's name and age, I took a quick glance at his vital signs.

BP : 100/30mmhg?

Most be ment, I thought. The nurse probably wanted to type 60 and inadvertently typed 30. The downside of using EMR (electronic medical records) I guess. Yes, the facility I work in uses EMR and that stuff not only slows down my pace at work but also denies me the privilege of messing with the pharmacist with my borderline illegible handwriting. So I made a mental note to recheck his BP after I'm done with taking down his history.

The patient was a young lad in his early twenties. Fresh guy wearing garish earrings bilaterally (as my colleagues are wont to write as their examination findings). And of course he wore the sling bag that is characteristic of every abobby in this Port Harcourt town. In this town if you are not a cultist or a yahoo boy, you better look like one.

'Abooby wida you? ' I asked.

Scratch that... Lol. Na ment?

He started by telling me that he is a blood donor.

Pause...

When a patient begins by first telling you about his occupation, then be assured that the diagnosis will most likely be linked to that occupation.

" Blood donor? I don't understand? Do you get paid to donate blood?" I asked while hoping against hope that his answer will be an emphatic no. My guy said yes.

I asked him how much he was paid for each pint of blood donated and he responded with 'N4500' . The next question that was to follow took quite some courage to ask because I knew that the answer would be very bloody.

"So how frequently do you donate your blood for pay?"

Abobby told me that he donates a pint every week and on alternate months on the average. And that in the past 1 year or so , he has donated blood like 16 times. Last donation being in February. To put things into perspective, blood donation should be at the rate of a pint every 3 months, except you are Jesus on the cross, in calvary, bearing the sins of humanity.

If the gulf between abooby and Christ wasn't so wide judging from his appearance (yes oh, I dey judge) , I would have rebuked him for taking the shibboleth 'givers never lack' which has been abused by pulpit hustlers, too seriously.

He then proceeded to complain about his symptoms proper of which none of them came as a surprise. Dizziness, fatigue and the other symptoms that the woman with the issue of blood probably had.

According to him, he went into the business of donating blood to make up for some financial needs of his. Nigeria sha. He also told me that the vampires he worked for gave him iron tablets to be taken daily while they were sucking his blood dry. He also said that they gave him guiness malt with milk occasionally and that's only when he felt dizzy after donating a tithe of his PCV. Imagine the altitude of the wickedness. Ionosphere shid.

Money wise, hematocrit foolish. The price of ignorance. The set up called Nigeria.

On examination he was pale and when I listened to his heart it murmured something sorrowful to my ears. It was so clear. They call it the haemic murmur. Also checked that blood pressure and it was confirmed that the nurse who took his vitals made no typo.

I went ahead and counselled him on the root cause of his problems as well as the diagnosis and also made him realise how wicked those vampires were. I also told him that he'll need to be admitted especially on account of that low diastolic BP I was seeing and I ordered some basic tests for him to carry out so that his blood level can be determined in order to know how many million pints of blood he would need.

Unfortunately he could ill afford to carry out the tests at the time not to mention paying for admission . He left but promised to come back when he has money.

Omor.. Funny but tragic fam. May your enemies not use your blood. The blood of Jesus is enough.

Have a nice weekend.


Source>> https://www.facebook.com/100000417947034/posts/pfbid08Dq1aBf3jqNzELTMx3EY2PQtpBa7aq37a8b75MLb9wdVezKbyqUCnQUmWWVnQygJl/?app=fbl