efficiencie:


It is a case of parenting. Many parents today are immature, childish and themselves also need training. Religious institutions ought to step in a correct this social milieu or else it will be the end of this generation. Virginity needs to be brought back to the center of marriages and intimate relationships. Religious institutions need to start emphasizing it as a requirement for weddings. We need to stop liberalizing everything and understand that there are some rules that should not be broken because when they are broken the consequences could be catastrophic. Imagine a 16 year old going for family planning. Complete madness. [/b]If that girl was informed that the moment she loses her virginity her chances of getting married would fall from 95% to 5% she will discipline herself and keep her sexual purity.[b] This would also completely eliminate the incidence of "side-chicry". Imagine the stupid mother. Like mother like daughter. She has passed ancestral/generational curse to her daughter and now she is seeking family planning for a 16 year old.

efficiencie:


Madness. I blame the churches and families that accept to make wives out of hoes. They will ask for genotype, blood group test and pregnancy test but they will not ask if the couples, especially the lady is sexually pure as a precondition for the solemnization of a marriage. Then when the couples start having sexually related issues in their marriage they will start rubbishing the marriage institution instead of calling out the fools that joined two misfits in an unholy matrimony. If every clergyman and every family enforced the virginity of ladies before marriage, this foolish mother will not allow her daughter have sex before marriage let alone going as far as recommending family planning for an underage girl and even the girl will never try any sexual nonsense knowing fully well she would be jeopardizing her chances of getting married. This will elevate the punishment for rape to capital punishment and will make rape victims easily prove their case.

Fahvvy:


A woman who had ALL her children out of wedlock CANNOT be a good mother, what exactly will she teach her children? ...

Can she be a good role model to her daughter's - Chasity wise?? ....

Can she boldly tell her kids that they shouldn't engage in premarital se.x? ...

And I wouldn't be surprised if she's a single mother, na their way be that ...

Because they wouldn't be a masculine figure in that girls life and this shit is happening ...

Like a 16year old will look at the masculine figure in her life (father) and say "I want to attend my boyfriend's father's birthday", them no born am well! ...

And the mother is saying she doesn't want the same for her child, if she really mean that, then she ought be have closed her legs and not have ALL her children out of wedlock...

She ought to have shunned her daughter from ANY intimate relationship with ANYONE,but no!!

She's allowing someone who isn't an adult to take decisions that could potentially ruin her future - what a mother! ....

Too much liberalism have brought us to this point...

Someone who don't know what it means to be a wife or mother is potentially busy having se.x upandan ...

Someone who can't even wipe her own as.s properly is allowed to jump from one Pole to the other ...

Someone who can't even take care of herself is given a leeway to start sleeping around ...

And yet the woman is saying "I don't want the same for my daughter", mtttttwwwwwwwww ...

Make she just prepare for history to repeat itself... An overwhelming number of children of single.mothers end up become single mothers themselves - numbers don't lie, make we dey wait ....

Elchapo212:

As a matter of fact she is in the best position to counsel her little girl(s) because she experienced it first hand. Mistakes don't make people. It's what u do after that matters because we all have our different shortcomings. From her actions it's obvious she means we'll for her child and probably doing better than a lot of parents who shy away from such discussions with their teenage girls. She is doing well so far. Try not to judge too quickly based on people's past mistakes

Sanmel:
This happened in a well known family planning facility. We thought the young lady was lying until we asked for her mother's number and put a call through.
According to her, her daughter has a boyfriend and the boyfriend's father will soon celebrate his 70th birthday, she's not going to be there and she doesn't know how far the daughter has gone or will go with the boyfriend. She also said, she had all her children out of wedlock and she doesn't want same for her daughter, so she requested for her daughter to be counseled and a method chosen if necessary.

Just in case you're not aware, the Planned Parenthood Federation of Nigeria (PPFN) has extended it services to both singles and underage so far they're sexually active..

What are your thoughts on this topic?

joyandfaith:


Abstinence is the best. That is godly approach. Worldly approach is the root of decay in society as most criminals are products of unstable families. Most of children borne out of wedlock are nuisance to society.

Fahvvy:


Sir...
Children don't learn from what you say, they learn from what they see you do ...

And if she indeed does mean well for her daughter like you say...

Then she ought to stop her daughter from being involved with a guy in this manner...

She allowing her daughter to go for family planning at 16 could give the impression that she's giving her daughter the leeway to have sex...

You'll agree with me that the biggest deterrent to a bad action is consequences...

Once consequences are removed, what's to stop a child from carrying out the act?

aisha1314:


I don't see anything wrong with a 16 year old being on family planning. After all the age of consent in many countries is 16. I don't see how this is such a big deal that it should be on the news.
In my opinion, sex should never be seen as something that is bad, dirty, shameful or immoral but just as a normal and healthy part of life and living. There's nothing wrong with sex as long as it's safe and consensual.

Elchapo212:


1.Yea kids pick up what they see u do around them. We don't know if she's living right or wrong or are u judging her by her having kids out of wedlock?

I understand consequences but then harsh realities probably influenced her options. It's also better she exposes her to sex education at least if she's not going to be chaste she should know what she's getting into.

2. At 16 girls are already into guys and sex so and now there's internet it's easier to connect with like minds from the confines of her room even without leaving the house. So her decision to enlighten the girl ain't all that bad if u ask me.

Sanmel:
Oh! My bad. I feel so awful right now..
Just that, I've been seeing so many similar cases lately and maybe I somehow felt bothered and shared this particular one even though I don't really fault the mother.
I tried deleting but I couldn't..

Kobojunkie:
What morals? You lot have been preaching these fables for at least the 40 years before now, and in that very same time, the decay has been faster than at any other point in time. How come?

felzokugo:
Ooohkay...i see.
Has the decadence ended or is it gonna be faster than d speed of sound?? Guess u lived b4 the last 40 years..(jus a thought).

MufasaLion:


Dude, she probably knew her daughter is sexually active, hence the reason she did what she did. Or you want to be doing virginity test for your daughter every now and then? Do you know the impact of that on a teenager's psychological and mental health? Same religious parents that will tell a female child that a touch will get her pregnant?? I mean, these kids can get whatever information about pregnancy and anything online and your bullshit lies will be GIGO!

As a parent, all you can do is guide your kids right from onset so as for them to be chaste at teenage years. Even if you are a cleric of a religious organisation, that your daughter might still end up having sex as a teenager and you still won't know! It's all about good parenting, not religion!

joyandfaith:
1. Abstinence is the best. That is godly approach.

2. Worldly approach is the root of decay in society as most criminals are products of unstable families.
3. Most of children borne out of wedlock are nuisance to society.

Kobojunkie:
Abstinence isn't a godly approach. There will be many virgins in Hell at the end, so don't be deceived by soundbites and noise which ultimately have nothing to do with God.

2. Worldly approach yet the vast majority of Nigerians have over the last 40 years turned to religion. Don't you see that the root of that which you consider worldly seems to branch at the same time from the many religious practices of the people?

3. Children born out-of-wedlock are a nuisance yet statistics in Nigeria reveals they pose as much a burden to society as those who are born to both father and mother?

joyandfaith:
1. Godly approach is not the same thing as r eligious approach. What God wants from you is simple. Abstinence is the best approach. Nothing can change that.

2. Children from dysfunctional homes are nuisance to society. They are evils who even influence Children from good homes. Take 10 thugs/armed robbers/cultists/prostitutes, 9 are from dysfunctional homes. The most important cause of dysfunctional home is sexual immorality.

3. Mere mortals can not be wiser than his creator in deciding what is good and bad.

Kobojunkie:

1. But God never asked you for abstinence so why offer to Him that which He never desired from you to begin with? Or what meaning would that be?

2. How many of those children from good homes do you meet on a regular basis in that country? Even the children of your pastors and mogs are counted by some are children from dysfunctional backgrounds. So who are you to decide who is good enough and who is not?

3. Problem here is you continue to confuse what are your personal delusions and hangups with that which is of God. Is there really anything more dysfunctional than that?

joyandfaith:
1. Read your Bible well to meaning of sexual immorality.
2. Families of pastors are not gold standards. Some could be of good examples. Bible is the standard. Family is the basic unit of society. Bad homes bad society. If humans ignore Godly principles, they would repeat it. Gal 6:7.

3. You don't know God and his words. That is the reason for your confusion and ignorance.

It doesn't belong to man who is walking to direct his own step . Jer 10:23

Kobojunkie:
1. You must be reading the book upside down because nowhere did Jesus Christ, the one who God sent to even you, inform you that abstinence holds any meaning with God. As I said earlier, His teachings make it clear that Virgins do dey Hell plenty.

2. There is no scriptural standard for the family. So, you must be smoking something to assume such exists.

3. Again, none of what you have claimed so far is of scripture so how can you sit and pretend you can judge mu knowledge of God?

joyandfaith:
See my signature

Kobojunkie:
I see a foolish person pointing fingers instead!

NoToPile:


Ermm let the bolded be virginity of both boy and the girl that are to be married.



Let me mention my green font friend Richy.4

fawaz050:
This matter is delicate, but the answer to it is simple. The root solution is to imbibe the fear of God in them from their crawling days.

I know of a boy born in 2009. Whenever he lies, his mom reminds him of what Allah said about the liars in the Qur'an and he starts crying � and begging his mom to help him seek forgiveness. His mum would say you need to seek forgiveness yourself then he does ablution start praying and making funny prayer points. If he doesn't want to pray, his mom reminds him of what was said about people who don't pray and he runs after us to the Masjid.

In addition, She does a lot of Positive reinforcement. For instance, she might say you are a good boy, right? Good boys don't play rough and he would stay quiet. She asks him his role model and gets him to imitate his role model after watching him on YouTube.

The outcome of all of that is wonderful. This boy is so modest, shy, upright. I pray God continues to guide him. I know all that seemed Islamic but I believe it can work with other beliefs too.

My point is - Inculcating the dear of God in children goes a long way.

stedan:
Some people self you just comment to be noticed making emphasis on virginity, this is where the traning comes in parents of boys should train them well so that our daughters will go out without being raped or cajole into premarital sex. If you are training your daughter to keep her virginity and your next door neighbor is seeing her as a prey to feed on what is the essence. Most of this teenagers that are sexually active today may not have been if the society will wake up and invest the same energy the use to tell the female gender to close their legs and tell the boys to Zip up.

bukatyne:


I don't understand how people think policing one sex on an activity that involves both sexes makes sense & would work.

Every heterosexual man sleeps with a woman. Every heterosexual adulterous husband sleeps with a woman.

If every man thinks it is ok to have multiple sexual partners in/outside marriage, I don't understand how they expect sexual purity/ virginity from the women.

It is either men & women zip up or everyone zips down.

We tried policing women in the past, it did not work and it never will.

Sanmel:
This happened in a well known family planning facility. We thought the young lady was lying until we asked for her mother's number and put a call through.
According to her, her daughter has a boyfriend and the boyfriend's father will soon celebrate his 70th birthday, she's not going to be there and she doesn't know how far the daughter has gone or will go with the boyfriend. She also said, she had all her children out of wedlock and she doesn't want same for her daughter, so she requested for her daughter to be counseled and a method chosen if necessary.

Just in case you're not aware, the Planned Parenthood Federation of Nigeria (PPFN) has extended it services to both singles and underage so far they're sexually active..

What are your thoughts on this topic?