What Saved Me When I Almost Turned Against God

The reason I'm here speaking so passionately about God and preaching His Word as though my life depends on it, is not because I have not had some devastating and bitter experiences myself along the way of my spiritual journey, because I have on several occasions.

The worst being when I lost someone very dear to me along the way, one of the very few persons who had my back when I made the decision to forsake my all to follow Christ.

Although that, on its own, wasn't what made me almost turn my back on God, as it happened several years later, it must have contributed its own fair share, since it was a combination of several lingering factors, including unanswered prayers and questions, that made me finally become fed up and decide to quit the race.

Now this took place over a decade after I had made the most demanding, selfless and sacrificial of my life, yet in spite of a few signs here and there, there was nothing much really to show that the God which I had known to be the God of Abraham, Moses, David, Elijah, the apostles, etc. had also become my own God, that is, the God of jesusjnr.

It even became arguably my major prayer point at the time, that God should prove to me that He had become my own God and that I was truly His servant, because I was tired of walking yet in uncertainty despite having put all my eggs into His basket.

I even out of desperation at a point, climbed to the top of a rock around where I lived severally to still tender this request of mine to see if that would make any difference, because nothing seem to be coming forth, and it now or never because I had gotten close to the edge.

But no response still whatsoever. It was as if I was talking to myself and all my efforts and prayers were falling on deaf ears. I can remember at the time how I was wondering if that was why and how people become atheists, because although I hadn't yet joined NL at the time, I have heard about some atheists and how some believers lost their faith in God.

That seemed the last straw for me though. I was done with God or so I thought.

I even stopped praying completely at that point for several months, because I wanted to completely severe ties, also to quench the tangible presence of His Spirit I used to feel on my body at the time, which seemed useless and of no benefit to me then, but used to intensify wherever I was praying.

That was the lowest point for me spiritually after I started walking closely with God, as I was really angry with God and let Him feel the brunt of my fury. I cursed and despised myself for choosing to fully rely on God. I felt like a complete fool. I wished I had never gone that far with God. My loved one's untimely death also aggravated the situation as it gave me more reason to be angry with God. That was surely it, I thought.

But... while I was yet doing the best I could to cut off ties completely from God and to go my own way as far away from Him as possible, I noticed that God Himself had other ideas and wasn't willing to let go of me. He held on to me as if to say, "you're not going anywhere, son".

Me I just tire. I was like, "which kind thing be this na". "You don't want to answer me, yet You don't want to let me go" This was already about six months since I last prayed so I expected that by then, I would have began to move on with my life, but God no gree oh. He seemingly said, "you aren't going anywhere, kapish!"

That was when it began to dawn on me that when I decided to forsake everything to follow Christ, I had entered into an everlasting bond with God that could never be broken.

It was an eternal marriage that nothing and no one could put asunder.

God bless.

It was then I also got a better understanding of what Jesus meant by the following saying:

Matthew 7:24-25 (KJV)

Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock:
And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock.

I also remembered that God also said something similar to me from the onset, that I would face many persecutions because of the Word, but because I was built upon the Rock, that I would not be moved.

So that saying of Jesus was what I realized actually played out in my spiritual life when I wanted to quit, because I wasn't only a hearer but also a doer of the Words of Jesus, hence had built my house upon the Rock as the wise man Jesus described, so even though the storms came and shook me to that extent, it couldn't make me fall because i was founded upon a Rock.

God bless

So after It became clear that my attempt to leave God was an exercise in futility, because what I had with God was unbreakable as the Rock, I gave up trying to quit, and began to seek answers from Him once again.

I wasn't happy though with what had transpired. It broke my heart that to see how I had become so angry with God because I loved God so much. God was my everything, so I asked Him if perhaps I shouldn't have left everything to rely on Him solely as I had done, because that was what made such things to hurt and affect me so much, but God told me that He preferred me that way regardless.

And while I kept seeking answers from Him after the storm had calmed down, He said to me, "why don't you allow me to finish the work I am doing in you"?

Honestly, it isn't easy to walk with God at the level I do, because that took place close to fifteen years after I made that decision, so I had already waited and waited and waited but it appeared that I hadn't still waited enough.

However something I also learnt from my experience is that God was always with me and more than able to see me through it all no matter how long it takes.

That was then though, because God has long answered my prayer and proven beyond any reasonable doubt that He's my God and I am His servant, including here in this forum, so that prayer request has long ceased to be a prayer point of mine.

There are many instances of such, some of which I've already shared here, including one concerning a cultist' No. 2 who despite seeing me for the first time and intended to rough handle me with his fellow cultists when I found myself in their den, started respecting me calling me "a man of God" because according to him, God told him not to play with me.

https://www.nairaland.com/7139099/what-god-did-when-found

This was something I had seen happen on several occasions with the men of God in the Bible, so now it's not just in the Bible that I heard about such, but also experienced it in my own life. So God has also proven that He's not just the God of Abraham, Moses, Elijah, and the apostles, but also the God of jesusjnr.

God bless.

One of the things I love so much about Jesus is that He prepares His own for the worst not just the best.

He prepares them for the day of the storms so that when the storm comes they would not be taken unawares but be ready.

That's why despite the sheer amount of persecutions, tribulations, trials, and even deaths they faced, those of the church He built, weren't turning against God or becoming atheists, babalawos, or leaving the faith as a result. It was because Jesus had prepared the church for the worst of storms, so that regardless, they wouldn't crash.

He's also the reason I have not crashed but still standing in the faith regardless of the storms I've faced.

He built me to be able withstand all manner of storms.

That's something I believe that many church leaders could do well to learn from the Master because in the life of every believer, one thing is sure. The storms would certainly come as persecution arises because of the Word.

So it's important that believers were also prepared for the storms, so that when it comes, it wouldn't be able to make them fall, because they were built upon the Rock.

God bless.

When I saw the conversation that ensued between some NL atheists sometime ago, I think last year, where they used me as reference for a NL theist who could never become atheist, I was really amazed that my example had become that convincing for atheists to even believe it.

But it was that close, if not, perhaps I would have added to the number of former Christians turned atheists after I joined, because I have heard of several theists who because of some unsavoury experiences, including death to a loved one, turn against God or atheists.

So I could easily be one of them going from one thread to another in the NL religion section, blaspheming against God and denying His existence, but instead God is using me here to confound and convert NL atheists to Christ.

Now isn't that amazing?

That what God is able to do with anyone who yields completely to Him to do whatever pleases Him.

God bless

AntiChristian:
You'll always have one story that happened some years ago sha!

You always have something to moan about in a Christian thread though.

Convert atheists you say!
All we ask for is a proof of your god.

If you are a believer in a god, what is your reason for not believing in all the other gods that humanity has invented and told stories about throughout history?
Do you know how many gods people seriously believed in? Come on, bud!

You'll always have one story that happened some years ago sha!

Wagwanbrethren:
Convert atheists you say!
All we ask for is a proof of your god.

If you are a believer in a god, what is your reason for not believing in all the other gods that humanity has invented and told stories about throughout history?
Do you know how many gods people seriously believed in? Come on, bud!

Trust me if God doesn't exist, I wouldn't be here wasting my time.

God has not only proven Himself to exist to me, but that He's my God and I am His servant as it was in the Bible days.

Perhaps you should ask Him sincerely yourself to do so as I had done myself.

As for the conversion is NL atheists to Christ, it's a well-known fact, except you're new here. You can ask your older colleagues to confirm this.

kingxsamz:


Seems like your god is doing poorly.
It's Christians on this forum abandoning their religion and becoming atheists, not the other way around.

Lol! You must have been fooled by some NL atheists/Satanists opening new NL accounts out of desperation, to denounce Christianity, otherwise mention just one well-known NL Christian that became atheist in the past few years.

The last verifiable case of such here either ways was when a well-known NL atheist came to Christ. Even some theists who turned atheists previously are now regretting their actions and turning back to Christ. Check screenshot below.

jesusjnr2020:
Trust me if God doesn't exist, I wouldn't be here wasting my time.

God has not only proven Himself to exist to me, but that He's my God and I am His servant as it was in the Bible days.

Perhaps you should ask Him sincerely yourself to do so as I had done myself.

So,tell me. Does your god picks who and who not to reveal/prove himself to?

There is literally no evidence of this. I mean, try it, ask for something and see what happens. Check statistics for those suffering terminal illnesses… there should be some difference between those that pray and those that don’t, but the chance of death stays the same, why is this?

I’m sure some theocrats will simply pass it off as “god works in mysterious ways” or “we couldn’t possibly understand what gods will is” despite them simultaneously saying they have perfect direction from god.
Put it this way, when your child is sick and the hospital and church are equal distances from each other, which one would you go to to ask for help?

Wagwanbrethren:

So,tell me. Does your god picks who and who not to reveal/prove himself to?

There is literally no evidence of this. I mean, try it, ask for something and see what happens. Check statistics for those suffering terminal illnesses… there should be some difference between those that pray and those that don’t, but the chance of death stays the same, why is this?

I’m sure some theocrats will simply pass it off as “god works in mysterious ways” or “we couldn’t possibly understand what gods will is” despite them simultaneously saying they have perfect direction from god.
Put it this way, when your child is sick and the hospital and church are equal distances from each other, which one would you go to to ask for help?

Yes God does pick!

Familiarity breeds contempt, so God has to be sure before He reveals Himself to anyone.

The people of Israel had all the proof they needed of God's existence in Egypt and the red sea, yet it took days for them to start making and bowing down to an idol.

Proof of God existence has proven itself not to guarantee belief or trust in God but could lead to abuse, so why would God be keen to give proof to everyone who asks of it?

Moreover proofs come with extra judgment as buttressed in the instance of Israel, so God is not willing to be destroying people as a result.

By the way, you shouldn't confuse God for the church. They mean two different things. And you must have heard of several instances, where hopeless cases with doctors and hospitals get cured with God or those who believe in God, or haven't you?

OkpaNsukkaisBae:
Same god that did absolutely nothing when Adolf Hitler murdered thousands/millions of jew?

Na d same god u wan make he save your loved ones? Wake up bro.
In the name of FSM I totally reject your early morning sermon... reading it alone can lower my IQ. May FSM bless you & your offspring.

It's infantile at best to blame anyone else but Israel for their own fate, after they've been warned severally by God that they'd suffer the same fate as the land's former inhabitants, if they followed their abominable practices, if not na who born Adolf Hitler? You're obviously ignorant of Israel's history.

As for my loved one who passed several years ago, I still believe that God is more than able to raise those dry bones from the grave if He wants, but even if He doesn't, He's still my God and I believe Him to death. Leave am like that for me.

Same god that did absolutely nothing when Adolf Hitler murdered thousands/millions of jew?

Na d same god u wan make he save your loved ones? Wake up bro.
In the name of FSM I totally reject your early morning sermon... reading it alone can lower my IQ. May FSM bless you & your offspring.

jesusjnr2020:
Yes He does pick...

Familiarity breeds contempt, so God has to be sure before He reveals Himself to anyone.

The people of Israel had all the proof they needed of God's existence in Egypt and the red sea, yet it took days for them to start making and bowing down to an idol.

Proof of God existence has proven itself not to guarantee belief or trust in God but could lead to abuse, so why would God be keen to give proof to everyone who asks of it?

Moreover proofs come with extra judgment as buttressed in the instance of Israel, so God is not willing to be destroying people as a result.

By the way, you shouldn't confuse God for the church. They mean two different things. And you must have heard of several instances, where hopeless cases with doctors and hospitals get cured with God or those who believe in God, or haven't you?

This is the most basic explanation…
You can pick either of these options
One… humans either created gods, not the other way around.

Two… that God doesn’t exist.

Three… people are just being delusional and are trying their best to accept God because they can’t do moral things without their “God’s” help.

Four… you’ll realize that religions are trying to manipulate people because they have no idea how to control the morals of every human in the world.
You may want to verify whether what I say is true or not. Think about someone who uses faith to cure people. Heck, why do we even have hospitals then? People are becoming idiots and just want to accept that God has a great plan for them.

Fine, if you say I shouldn't mistake the church with god, then allow me to rephrase my statement. "When your child is sick and the hospital and 'god' are equal distances from each other, which one would you go to ask for help?

No. There is no “god” that will magically fix something that is wrong physically, mentally, emotionally or in any other way.
There are claims that a god healed someone from across the globe and through time. All sorts of gods accomplishing all sorts of feats – and not a hint of evidence that it is true.

And you never, EVER see a limb regrown through the power of faith and god.
No, I am sorry, but there is no magic cure out there.

Wagwanbrethren:

This is the most basic explanation…
You can pick either of these options
One… humans either created gods, not the other way around.

Two… that God doesn’t exist.

Three… people are just being delusional and are trying their best to accept God because they can’t do moral things without their “God’s” help.

Four… you’ll realize that religions are trying to manipulate people because they have no idea how to control the morals of every human in the world.
You may want to verify whether what I say is true or not. Think about someone who uses faith to cure people. Heck, why do we even have hospitals then? People are becoming idiots and just want to accept that God has a great plan for them.

Fine, if you say I shouldn't mistake the church with god, then allow me to rephrase my statement. "When your child is sick and the hospital and 'god' are equal distances from each other, which one would you go to ask for help?

No. There is no “god” that will magically fix something that is wrong physically, mentally, emotionally or in any other way.
There are claims that a god healed someone from across the globe and through time. All sorts of gods accomplishing all sorts of feats – and not a hint of evidence that it is true.

And you never, EVER see a limb regrown through the power of faith and god.
No, I am sorry, but there is no magic cure out there.

I'm not here to argue about what is glaringly obvious, so choose to believe what you want, but whatever you choose it can never stop God from existing.

God bless.

Wagwanbrethren:

Sure, it's your choice to ignore basic logic, and stick by your religion.
Satan bless!

Yeah... it's logical to believe that an intelligent design has no intelligent designer...

You should now see why I don't waste time arguing with atheists.

They only lose their common sense when it comes to God.

jesusjnr2020:
I'm not here to argue about what is glaringly obvious, so choose to believe what you want, but whatever you choose it can never stop God from existing.

God bless.

Sure, it's your choice to ignore basic logic, and stick by your religion.
Satan bless!

nonsense

Funny theist

jesusjnr2020:
When I saw the conversation that ensued among some NL atheists sometime ago, I think last year, where they used me as a reference for an nairalander who could never become atheist, I was really amazed that my example had become that convincing for atheists to even believe it.

But it was that close, if not, perhaps I would have added to the number of former Christians turned atheists after I joined, and be going from one thread to another in the religion section, blaspheming against God and denying His existence, but instead God is using me here to confound and convert NL atheists to Christ.

Now isn't that amazing?

That what God is able to do with anyone who yields completely to Him.

God bless

Seems like your god is doing poorly.
It's Christians on this forum abandoning their religion and becoming atheists, not the other way around.

Thank you Jesus!