A male child is very very very important to an Igbo man whether literate or illiterate!

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Igbos society is mostly patrilineal except in rare cases where a girl child is unable to het married. Some parts of Igboland are matrilineal but small compared to the over 85% that believe inheritance is passed down through male lineage. In traditional Igbo society the Ojiofor or village head is the Okparaukwu who comes from a lineage of first sons dating centuries backwards. Not having a male child could lead to end of a lineage except one of the daughters decides to stay back without marriage and give birth to a male child to continue her father's lineage.

Draslo:
He has told you his mind. Even if he is truly joking and is a forward thinker, his backwards people back home will make him think otherwise. They will chase you away while they will reap where they did not sow. They're the only tribe in Nigeria that has a special name for the first born daughter but that's where it ends. She no get relevance again until she is getting married so others will come again to reap where they did not sow. Thank your stars you're abroad otherwise, you can start sewing black cloth and practice drinking corpse water


Make una quote me. I am ready.

You see this thing you just posted bro it is very true and thought provoking, especially that part about special name for first daughters Infact I have book marked this comment !!

@Vincenzomum take heed and break off that marriage with that ibo man it won't end well oo, you have been having issues with him and still having issues, even if you can't break up with him do something to put him in his place, make him know you can do very well without him and it is him that needs you and the kids! If you do this trust that is the last time that ibo man would give you headache !!

He's not joking ooh, it escaped his mouth and he quickly realised he made a mistake. 99% Igbo men will feel empty without a male child and it's very deep because Igbo are patriarchal like the Jew. May God give you a male child so that your husband will be super happy and not sneak back into Nigeria to impregnate another girl or even marry her. But he should have done ivf with sex selection as you are in Europe.

Just know he is not joking. It is super very very important to Igbos,ignore those telling you otherwise oo for your own good they know the truth.

To show you how important, a church member member had 4 girls, she was always the first to come out when they ask those seeking for fruit of the womb, finally she had a boy.

Another woman told me how happy she was to have a son as no 2 because for' my place if you never born boy you never start'

Just few examples around.

Ask obidients

KingMack:
That's why there are so many un serious men in the village now..all they do is to do drugs and booze, patiently waiting for their old father to die so they can inherit the old mud house😟

I don't know weither you think before you type trash, you've access to 10mb everyday doesn't mean you shouldn't know how to control your mentality

VIKTO83:








I want to ask u something and I want u to be sincere about it.
Pls if ur father has u and ur sisters only without a male child amongst U, how will u feel about ur family?
Tell me d truth about it. Tell me without any atom of hypocrisy pls.
And as ur2father is getting older how will ur family feel when all of u girls had gotten married and left?
Say d truth so that God will be happy with u.

Sincerely, I won't be happy.

As I grew older, I cherished the fact that at least my parents could have a son after 5 girls.

There are things I will need and even if my sister's can't do that for me, my brother comes to my rescue especially if a situation requires a male figure to be present even if by proxy.

I will however not support a woman outside to be impregnated inorder to have a son for my dad assuming we had no brother in order to Avert any future problems which includes inheritance issues. We can better resolve it ourselves even with 5 girls plus a mum.

I believe this things is based on individual families.... Mind you, SS also believe in the importance of males in the family.

Any of your daughters can choose to bear hyphenated surnames by adding your husband's name and that of HER husband's.

But come o, I thought names within a family changes with time especially with Igbos. You see some start bearing English surnames or their kids bearing their first names.

Vincenzomum:
I am married to a Igbo man. We are based in Italy. We have 4 children 3 together. I have 3 girls for him. I tested positive for baby number 5 and we were discussing about the gender, my husband said something that makes me feel so bad.

He wants a son so bad. He said in Igbo tribe, a man is nothing without a son. I asked him what if we had another baby girl he said he will have no choice but to go to Nigeria and marry another woman who will bear sons for him so he can be a real man.

I asked him if he was serious then he changed his words saying he was joking, he doesn't mind the sex of our baby as long as the baby is healthy that is what matter.

I have been restless since he has mentioned about marrying a second wife even though he said it was a joke but I know that he wasn't joking, he was serious.

I want to know from igbo people, is it true that a man is nothing without a son and also what if the wife only bore female children is it compulsory for the man to marry a second one in Igbo tribe to bear him sons?

Seems like you didn't read the Terms & Conditions properly and completely when you decided to settle for an Igbo Man?

Yes, in our IGBO tradition and culture, a MALE son is a MUST!

Take it or leave it.

sharone21:


Sincerely, I won't be happy.

As I grew older, I cherished the fact that at least my parents could have a son after 5 girls.

There are things I will need and even if my sister's can't do that for me, my brother comes to my rescue especially if a situation requires a male figure to be present even if by proxy.

I will however not support a woman outside to be impregnated inorder to have a son for my dad assuming we had no brother in order to Avert any future problems which includes inheritance issues. We can better resolve it ourselves even with 5 girls plus a mum.

I believe this things is based on individual families.... Mind you, SS also believe in the importance of males in the family.

Any of your daughters can choose to bear hyphenated surnames by adding your husband's name and that of HER husband's.

But come o, I thought names within a family changes with time especially with Igbos. You see some start bearing English surnames or their kids bearing their first names.

Remove South South from that writeup .... If you are Igbo face your region solely and do not speak on other foreign cultures

Who gives a Bleep abt male child

As for me i hate dis world and i dont want any lineage to take-over me. If i have 4 girl child i will be the happiest man on earth

Pls dis is for me as i dont know of odars

AutomaticMotors:


Remove South South from that writeup .... If you are Igbo face your region solely and do not speak on other foreign cultures

.

I be FULL BLOODED SS babe.

Vincenzomum:



Thanks so much for the explanation now i understand that having a second wife or son is not compulsory and if he decide to get a second one to bear him sons it will be for his own selfish reason and nothing to do with his tribe

please you are misunderstanding the man. Male child is extremely important to an average Igbo man for many reasons.

Education and experience is making some people not place such importance on male kids but trust me, there are very few of such people.

It becomes worse if the man comes from "Obi" and wants to inherit same

sharone21:
.

I be FULL BLOODED SS babe.

Ok What state?

Vincenzomum:



Thanks so much for the explanation now i understand that having a second wife or son is not compulsory and if he decide to get a second one to bear him sons it will be for his own selfish reason and nothing to do with his tribe

Did u just said selfish reason? That's too harsh...
Imagine being the only son just like myself, I wouldn't want my family line to end just like that...
It's never a selfish reason...women re someone else's
Properties.

Segzy19:
What if he isn't destined to have a son?
A man determines the sex of a child, not the woman.... If he likes let him change wives, marry or impregnate all the ladies in his villages, if he won't have a son, he won't still have it....

I have heard this highlighted fallacy too much. A woman and the sex position will determine the sex of the child and not the man, though the man is the carrier of the 'Y' chromosome for male children, but he cannot determine the sex of the child, as there is no way the man can decide to release only 'Y' chromosomal semen onto the woman to have a male child.

Segzy19:
What if he isn't destined to have a son?
A man determines the sex of a child, not the woman.... If he likes let him change wives, marry or impregnate all the ladies in his villages, if he won't have a son, he won't still have it....

I don't believe in destiny. I believe in, you determine what you become in life. IVF Dey, meeting your wife in her pick OVULATION is a 80 percent assurance that you would have a male child. Once a mail in enlighten his chances of having a male is high. I have a family friend, he has 6 girls, they guy won die, for the guy mind, so na so 9ja boys go use prick finish all him girls, and the guy get money, they had to travel out of the country and they did IVF, Na now the guy just get Male child, na now the wife start to dey happy.

A Male is important ohh.

My dear sister, forget all this it is not important.
Women don't inherit property in Igbo land. If the man dies, and have female children, the property goes to the nearest brother to the man. Even though a court of law has on several occasions ruled again that. But na the jazz wey go dey involved for the dragging of the properties be the Koko.
Secondly continuation of family name.
It is assumed in Igbo land that the generation of the man that has only female children ends the day he dies.
Technology is helping now in the determination of the sex of a baby. You can consider that to make your marriage settled. Some men will go have the child outside of marriage without the wife's knowledge but only the family will be aware.. And e go clear the woman for eye if the man dies because all the family will join hands in making sure all the properties goes to the biological son even if it's out of the marriage. If the female children are not married and maybe in school arrangement will be made for their upkeep until marriage and also the wife if she still want to be with the family. That is the tradition. Anybody trying to tell you anything else is just apply modern culture. Some families are considerate though but it's rare.

The reason for this is because the woman may decide to marry another man and the family of the man will not let her take the property to the new man. If they won't accuse the woman of killing the man.
A female child has no inheritance right in Igbo culture. Only male children. My uncle had 4 houses when he died and had a boy and 4 girls. Na the boy inherited both the landed the house . Na only the gift given to the female children when they were marrying is all they got.

I will marry a second wife if am your husband too , in igbo culture your linage is closed already, because your female children will all get married and move out,so you are left with nothing

What is bad if he takes another wife to bear him the sons. Don't rush yourself to your grave. Be hardworking. Have something doing that would fetch you money. Free the man. Let him leave his life. Take care of your children first 🤣

It's just an old Tradition that is gradually phasing out, most Igbo men know the importance of Female Child. Na Woman dey remember home. Plus any man that Complains about having a Female Child also questions God and is ungrateful. Na God dey give Pikin Male or Female..

SGANIVA:
I will marry a second wife if am your husband too , in igbo culture your linage is closed already, because your female children will all get married and move out,so you are left with nothing

but it's the Man that is responsible for Male Child not the Woman, the Male have the Y chromosome necessary for producing boy and all the Woman has is 2 X Chromosomes. Some men have blindly been sent to their early graves for going against God's plan in their Life.

SUPERPACK:
It has more to do with his Ego and cultural intimidation. Here in igboland it is easy for someone to make a jest of you for not having a son, when you quarel with someone they remember you that you have no son and not man enough. This intimidation is gradually fading away but still present in age grade gatherings.

Funny thing is, the man take it out on his wife and in truth, having a Male Child solely rest on the man and not the woman.

If u like marry from whatever tribe you come from and have 3 daughters your husband will also wish for a son abi you yourself don't you want a son after 3 girls?tchew

Vincenzomum:



Thanks so much for the explanation now i understand that having a second wife or son is not compulsory and if he decide to get a second one to bear him sons it will be for his own selfish reason and nothing to do with his tribe

Not so fast ma'am. Please don't let the so called modern society fool you. Make children are very important in Igbo culture.

Aside from inheritance, and the need to continue the family name, it plays a major part when it comes to the defence of the family.

Yiu will never understand the responsibility of a man in Igbo land until you find yourself in one of such situation. There are wars a woman cannot fight hence, a male presence.

My sincere advice: give him that msle child if you know how to! Cos when such implication comes in the future, even you won't be safe.

Your husband NEEDS a male child. It is not about him being selfish, he needs it for security and relevance purposes.

All gender is important. Yes, the Igbos place high value on son's than daughters.

But the solution to this would have been, a bit of biology research.
The Y sperm moves faster than the X sperm.
And the Y sperm stays in the body of a woman for 24 hours and dies off while the X sperm stays for 3 days days but moves slow.
So I will just in other to get high chance of a male child, your husband should have intercourse a day before ovulation or the D-Day of ovulation rather than other days of your fertile window.

But you are already pregnant for a 5th child;
U can try this method if u have plans to have a 6th child.

Efewestern:


Do people care about lineage or who inherits what's left on ground?

The reason most Igbo people want a male kid is so their offspring takes over from them but that is not so with other Southern tribes. If I give birth to 10 females and 0 male, I won't even be perturbed because I know they will inherit everything I labour for.

An Igbo woman inheritance is with her husband.
She can inherit her father property only if she didn't marry.

No ethnic group in Nigeria spend more on personal development of their daughters than the Igbo. SE has the highest enrollment of females in JAMB exams.
The idea is not far fetched. She is going to her husband house to share the inheritance of her husband with the children she will bear for him, so she must be equipped to be able to fend for herself in a new kindred.

SUPERPACK:
It has to do with inheritance rights in igboland. Only a male is considered when it comes to inheritance, it is also important for the family name to continue in Igbo culture and only a man can do this.

By right it is not compulsory to have a male child and only your husband can decide if he needs one badly and cannot forgo.

I know so many Igbo couple living happily without a male child and are now old.

I am Igbo too and place no importance on male child, all children are important and non is more important than the other.

While you are right in some respect, you are not entirely right Sir.... Because the Supreme Court in a landmark case I will call a locus classicus in Ukeje V Ukeje delivered by Justice Walter Nkanu Onnoghen held that women has right to their late father's properties in igbo land.

But I agree with your judgement in terms of the continuation of the family's name... it's very important.

Madam don't panic let him marry and born 4 additional girls the shock will send him to early grave.
Like the case of one man that married another wife due to the fact that his wife was unable to give him a male child.... now the second wife has given birth to 3 girls.