Just do as he said, ask your wife to be to do a fertility test but don't tell her your dad said so, how well do you know your fiancee? How well do you know her background, family etc?

As a Medical prof, Dad, Elder, Husband, Uncle...your dad's life experiences can't be same with yours, he has seen & experienced things you're yet to see & experience, besides do you think he's doing this for himself

From experience, I'd suggest you just do as he says, no much questions asked, no be everything father dy tell him son

Just do it, no stress/prolong am

Goodluck!

beekind:

Guy please don't address my dad like that.

chei! Americana don vex

ednut1:
many are toxic feminists, don’t want to do chores or raise kids, many are not family oriented etc. Nigerian babes based in Nigeria are also easy to impress or maybe they are pretending so they can japa. [/b]but the babe u bring from Nigeria will eventually learn all this and be like them.

Lmao
So is it worth the stress in the end?

It is a no brainer. Do a fertility test before you get married so you can know what is ahead. Make pastor for no open office for una head

beekind:

Guy please don't address my dad like that.

Why you come sample his dress here.

Your papa too love you my guy.

AngelicBeing:
Hian, wetin person no go read for nairaland.com

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Sharp Shooter..... I like your way, babe..👍

ednut1:
you have been out of 9ja for a long time. You dont know wetin dey sup. How about find an investigator in Nigeria to find out about her. I volunteer to pay. Person wey fit dey another man house right now 🤣🤣🤣

Please I can do the investigator work..

Make Sapa no kill me abeg..I am serious

lebron7:

Exactly!
Look at his response lmao
He said the ladies there are old

I believe most of them want women that are naive

Don't mind him!

beekind:

Guy please don't address my dad like that.

. Your dad is telling you the truth. Even if the girl has problems with her fertility, you have to know before hand.
In marriage everything is laid bare. No hidden things or nondisclosure.
Even in churches now, they mandate couples to do fertility test before wedding to enable you know before hand what you are getting into. When you know it, you can now make your decision. So as not to say tomorrow that you didn't know.

eroticecstasy:


Your dad is a medical doctor practicing in Nigeria, Port Harcourt precisely. Whatever advice he's giving you is out of his experience as a doctor. Most of our girls have destroyed their representative system with alcohol, had drugs and contraceptives.

You're only 30+ and you're feeling too big to be advised by your dad. This is the reason why we have serious marital breakdown everywhere, children of today feels they're wiser than their parents, what a lost generation?


We live in the age of babies getting married to babies, then giving birth to babies.

50% of fertility problems are caused by the man.
Get your facts right.
As she is doing, he too is running his own fertility checks.



Guy is in late 30, most likely to start having bigger fertility problem in present day Nigeria where an average man of 25 is already having erectile dysfunction.

beekind:
I am a 38 year old Nigerian American citizen dating a 26 year old Nigeria girl.
I grew up in Nigeria but travelled out to the USA when I was 25 years old, I am a citizen now and doing really well for myself.
I met a beautiful and godly Nigerian girl on facebook and we have been dating for some months now we are now thinking of marriage, she is in Nigeria while I am in the USA.

Some weeks ago my dad asked me to do some tests and send to him, (He is a medical doctor), I did them, turns out to be fertility tests and all was perfect.
I just told him about my fiance and my plans to get married in some months time and he said she has to do fertility test before he can agree to the marriage.

This was very shocking for me as he insisted that it is his position, I haven't told my fiance cos I dont know how to and my fiance is scheduled to pay my parents a visit for the first time in Port Harcourt in 2 weeks time.
My fiance is from Delta but lives in Portharcout as my parents while we are from Port harcourt.

My dad has said if I cannot tell her that he will, what do you guys think ?

Honest advise please and admin kindly push to front page for wider advise.

Thanks.

As it Pleases you...since you can not tell her.. Allow ur Dad to handle it in a very Matured Wag during her maiden visit to them,Pls. That is even the most appropriate time...and to show her his Seriousness or acceptance of her as his Daughter in law.

Just tell her the both of you need to visit the hospital for a check up, tell her you normally do that , since you are an American citizen it won't sound somehow

beekind:
I am a 38 year old Nigerian American citizen dating a 26 year old Nigeria girl.
I grew up in Nigeria but travelled out to the USA when I was 25 years old, I am a citizen now and doing really well for myself.
I met a beautiful and godly Nigerian girl on facebook and we have been dating for some months now we are now thinking of marriage, she is in Nigeria while I am in the USA.

Some weeks ago my dad asked me to do some tests and send to him, (He is a medical doctor), I did them, turns out to be fertility tests and all was perfect.
I just told him about my fiance and my plans to get married in some months time and he said she has to do fertility test before he can agree to the marriage.

This was very shocking for me as he insisted that it is his position, I haven't told my fiance cos I dont know how to and my fiance is scheduled to pay my parents a visit for the first time in Port Harcourt in 2 weeks time.
My fiance is from Delta but lives in Portharcout as my parents while we are from Port harcourt.

My dad has said if I cannot tell her that he will, what do you guys think ?

Honest advise please and admin kindly push to front page for wider advise.

Thanks.

You met a godly Nigerian girl on Facebook and you are dating her from United States abi... make una dey play

simfrost90210:



🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Sharp Shooter..... I like your way, babe..👍

Hian, are you referring to me or the person l quoted, huh

[quote author=JeffreyJunior post=122896304]You guys have been dating online, have only known each other for 10 months and she has already agreed to marry you.

Lord have mercy.😮

You really need to slow down, dude. No wonder your dad feels uncomfortable. I'm sure you are currently lying to him about knowing your woman so well and all that sh1t just like I lied to my folks too.😄

Been there, done that and I have a feeling you're headed the same path that I did. Thanks to heavens, things fell apart and it was like the shells in my eyes fell off.

You may not be as lucky as I was and once you're all in, your clock of destruction starts ticking.



Exactly my thought…you haven’t met her before
Spend few times together to see her behavior and you just decided to marry her,no be so na…slow down bro 😎 I totally support your dad’s decision

beekind:

What exactly is your point ?
What does it take to do a fertility test in the USA, is it not what you tell the doctor he will act on ?
Does he have to follow you home to watch you have sex before giving you a requisition to the lab ?

And what exactly do you mean by a 38 year old asking these kind of questions, I didn't know when you are 38 years old you are above learning from others.

You are a boy in a man’s body. Your replies to various inputs here reflects the kind of person that you are.
This is strictly a family affair and a decision you should take as a man but you are not doing that because you haven’t grown.

If this was my sister, I’ll advise her to stay away from you.

Your babe go don see the thread o.

beekind:
I am a 38 year old Nigerian American citizen dating a 26 year old Nigeria girl.
I grew up in Nigeria but travelled out to the USA when I was 25 years old, I am a citizen now and doing really well for myself.
I met a beautiful and godly Nigerian girl on facebook and we have been dating for some months now we are now thinking of marriage, she is in Nigeria while I am in the USA.

Some weeks ago my dad asked me to do some tests and send to him, (He is a medical doctor), I did them, turns out to be fertility tests and all was perfect.
I just told him about my fiance and my plans to get married in some months time and he said she has to do fertility test before he can agree to the marriage.

This was very shocking for me as he insisted that it is his position, I haven't told my fiance cos I dont know how to and my fiance is scheduled to pay my parents a visit for the first time in Port Harcourt in 2 weeks time.
My fiance is from Delta but lives in Portharcout as my parents while we are from Port harcourt.

My dad has said if I cannot tell her that he will, what do you guys think ?

Honest advise please and admin kindly push to front page for wider advise.

Thanks.

Tell your pops to calm down. He is in no place to tell her to do that. All he has to do is be patient for you to tell her. As for you, all you need do is find the best possible way to tell your fiancée and convince her to do it. If it’s even possible for you to do another test in the same hospital with her, so she knows it’s a two way thing, then it’s better. If she refuses to do it , find out her reason, if you find it reasonable, then it’s your turn to convince your pops. But if it’s not making sense, move on with your life and find another girl.

descarado:

50% of fertility problems are caused by the man.
Get your facts right.
As she is doing, he too is running his own fertility checks.



Guy is in late 30, most likely to start having bigger fertility problem in present day Nigeria where an average man of 25 is already having erectile dysfunction.

Next time read with understanding sir

Pls social media is not the best place to seek for advised on sensitive matter like this... Some of the comentors are not even married yet nor did they are have a child, but using logic to give advised on the matter... Listen if you really wants to settle down and enjoyed your marriage pls remove emotional thinking and face the reality by doing what is right... Fertility test is one of the test you should do before proposing or are you telling me your father is more enlightened than you? You should be greatful to your dad for the advised... Pls man go and do the test .... If you don't know how to present it for her, you guys should all carryout the test ...

lebron7:

Lmao
So is it worth the stress in the end?

its 50: 50 , with the babes there its 90:10. At least you don born like 2 kids with someone with family values wey fit raise them. Unlike the ones there wey get 5 kids with 4 men 😅😅. There are many easy babes in Nigeria too. If abroad guy with papers toast 10 9ja babes. At least 8 go gree marriage with cheap ring and only registry and no honeymoon 😀.

That one no be your papa problem na abi e get wetin we no know?

AngelicBeing:
Hian, are you referring to me or the person l quoted, huh

Wahala no dey finish ... hanty
I'm referring to the quotee not the quoter

Exodus15v11:
As a Doctor and as your Dad, he has your best interests at heart. He's in the best position to guide and advise you accordingly, and is trying to do just that. It's up to you to listen.

Besides, these are normal pre-marriage protocols and he asked you to do them first, so it only makes sense that she does the same. I don't see the big deal in asking her to also do them, unless you're afraid to ask.

The bolded is obviously the case. Don't be surprised he hasn't also considered genotype factor.

Rokiat:
Let’s hope once you are ready to consummate your marriage you wouldn’t invite your father over as well because what in the father and son duo is going on here?

The kind of people on Nairaland these days, na only God fit help Dem o. So uncultured

beekind:
I am a 38 year old Nigerian American citizen dating a 26 year old Nigeria girl.
I grew up in Nigeria but travelled out to the USA when I was 25 years old, I am a citizen now and doing really well for myself.
I met a beautiful and godly Nigerian girl on facebook and we have been dating for some months now we are now thinking of marriage, she is in Nigeria while I am in the USA.

Some weeks ago my dad asked me to do some tests and send to him, (He is a medical doctor), I did them, turns out to be fertility tests and all was perfect.
I just told him about my fiance and my plans to get married in some months time and he said she has to do fertility test before he can agree to the marriage.

This was very shocking for me as he insisted that it is his position, I haven't told my fiance cos I dont know how to and my fiance is scheduled to pay my parents a visit for the first time in Port Harcourt in 2 weeks time.
My fiance is from Delta but lives in Portharcout as my parents while we are from Port harcourt.

My dad has said if I cannot tell her that he will, what do you guys think ?

Honest advise please and admin kindly push to front page for wider advise.

Thanks.

I support your dad on this 100% considering what Nigerian girls have turned to, yes it may be true that your fiencee is from a godly home but guy you are in far away America while she's in this hell hole so I take it that you might know just a little about her except what she presents to you, and one more thing.....if you have family in Nigeria I did suggest they also do some background checks too.

[quote author=pocohantas post=122901445]

How about you pay an investigator to find about yourself? Majority of you diasporans will use your hand to come for homebased partners, then peace of mind would depart them. Save yourself the stress and marry there.

The guy is 38 and SINGLE, but na the girl you wan pay to investigate. So the OP hasn't visited another woman's house since he was born? Diasporans always claiming spotless by virtue of foreign citizenship. Na all these girls wey fit die to marry abroad guy una fit do this one for. Bunch of narcissists! [/

Longest time..were have you been

beekind:

Let me explain, he says he is not forcing her but if she does not take the fertility test he will not attend the wedding, and he is very likely to prohibit my mom from also attending the wedding and maybe other family members too.

That puts me in a very difficult spot, very difficult spot.

nothing is difficult there we are in an ultra modern world all those are normal marriage protocols the one should do on normal day ,don't leave anything in dought, there is no harm in telling her you need a fertility test , it is normal, all those things that we tend to ignore in order not to annoy our partners before marriage are the things that will come and hunt us during the marriage. Any thing that is import or you care about you can ask and clarify , it is better to have issues before marriage t after marriage , beside you dad is a doctor he is not just speaking as a dad but as a professional with a lot of experience , he knows what he has handled as a doctor ,

beekind:

Guy please don't address my dad like that.

Na you dragged him to the Internet. You disrespected him first. Meanwhile are you going to be spoonfed by your dad at every critical decision? Why would you wait for your dad to tell you the right thing at all time and even at that you are still here talking jargons. I sure your dad will be disappointed by the time he comes across your tread.

This is simple na. As soon as you get to Nigeria go with her to a lab and run all necessary tests,do yours too so she wouldn't be suspicious of anything.

ednut1:
its 50: 50 , with the babes there its 90:10. At least you don born like 2 kids with someone with family values wey fit raise them. Unlike the ones there wey get 5 kids with 4 men 😅😅. There are many easy babes in Nigeria too. If abroad guy with papers toast 10 9ja babes. At least 8 go gree marriage with cheap ring and only registry and no honeymoon 😀.

Lmao
This logic makes a lot more sense

pocohantas:


I do not take any age as a red flag, because life happens to people and sometimes they find themselves there. In fact, I prefer them in that age range. Except of course you show me something that I can't take.

So what if they want to japa? The most important thing should be the person's intentions for you. Your citizenship is a bonus, a good one. I am not hyped about relocation, as such I am quite impatient to you guys usual shenanigans. Feels like it is not worth it to me. I would rather be divorced in Nigeria than in America/Canada or UK. At least there is no incentive to leaving a man in Nigeria. But abroad? No one would listen to me. They will say I have used Ednut for papers and dumped him. Women are as scared as you guys are. Some of you could be drug addicts or serial killers. You can shoot me to death. We have seen it happen.

Make una allow us breathe abeg. One of your Canadian brothers is currently giving my friend high bp and I have told her the day she breaks up is the the day she will start sleeping well.

You always make sense...you are loved