Notfogotten:
Please I have a question to ask.

I don't want to go into details so my partner doesn't trace this to me.

My partner came to UK before me, though still on student visa. I joined her with my 3 children one months ago.

I have noticed some red flags which never happened while we where in Nigeria and I was footing the bills alone.

Each red flag, I pretend nothing happened because I don't want to be thrown out like the man I read about on social media.

My visa is dependent on hers and we are still on student visa.

My question, in the event that we get papers to stay permanently in UK and one day she decides to send me packing or I decide move out, will I be asked to return to Nigeria because she is the main applicant?

Please I need urgent answers. I may not play the fool for long. We are very certain of getting papers next year.

Where you wan see papers from within 1 year?

What red flags did you notice?

Notfogotten:
Please I have a question to ask.

I don't want to go into details so my partner doesn't trace this to me.

My partner came to UK before me, though still on student visa. I joined her with my 3 children one months ago.

I have noticed some red flags which never happened while we where in Nigeria and I was footing the bills alone.

Each red flag, I pretend nothing happened because I don't want to be thrown out like the man I read about on social media.

My visa is dependent on hers and we are still on student visa.

My question, in the event that we get papers to stay permanently in UK and one day she decides to send me packing or I decide move out, will I be asked to return to Nigeria because she is the main applicant?

Please I need urgent answers. I may not play the fool for long. We are very certain of getting papers next year.

Lol, you are now strategizing like women in a marriage where the men can do whatever he wants and she must swallow or be kicked out of her home. This is why when wives wait it out and strike years later when ball lands in her court people say oh she is a bad woman.
Your answer: NO! Once you get your perm residence divorce won't lead to deportation

The answer is no, however you won't be getting PR in the next 5 to 7years because she is on a student visa. She has to get a work/care visa to be eligible for PR which takes about 5 years to get. If you are concerned, you should aim to get a care worker or a skilled worker visa,that way you are independent of her visa.

Oluwomonext212:
Make peace with her and make ur marriage work like before. At the same time, brace up as a man and prepare ur mind for the worst. But in all, if she decide to give u a red card today u won’t be asked to leave the UK immediately except u committed an heinous crime. You would only be asked to switch ur visa within 3 months or go home. So if you wish you can from now start looking for a job with sponsorship to at least be on a safer side.

Y'all still not reading right

Which one is make peace with her? Was he fighting with her? You lots still don't get it...once a woman wants you gone, nothing you do pacifies her!!! You are a goner. I prefer his approach. Build in secret and shock your shocker when the time comes

PDJT:
-Stay within the law and ensure you record every of her abusive moves towards you. You can use those evidence to get permanent residency, if you really want to stay in the UK in your own right.

-At the moment, you have as much rights as her.

-However, I would advise you and any other man relocating to the UK or the West, NEVER assume full responsibility for your family. In the West it is a shared responsibility between you and your wife, that's why they call it partnership. If you must buy a property, make sure your partner contribute as much as you do as well as share your bills equally if possible, otherwise share it based on percentage of earnings.

-Never contribute more than you should. You're no longer in Africa.

Sense full this talk. I understand why you said this. Most Nigerian men have carried this their penchant for taking care of all the bills to western climes and when they get kicked out, the pain and loss is 100%

Op in life, you must get plan B and be emotionally and psychological prepared for any eventuallities.
First thing, sit her down and have a heart to heart discussion with her.
Try and get a cos codedly.
Double your hustle and save for rainy day.
Be prepared emotionally for anything.
My favourite maxim is hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.
Good luck brother

jaxxy:


Serving breakfast isn't a big deal and anybody can serve it including u but it is ridiculous to eat breakfast b4 it's even cooked talkless of served.

Any small thing u start to think of walking because u don't know how to resolve the issue. the next marriage u may run out. Lol

Doesn't all marriages have issues bt it's how they handle it.

Jaxxy go and sit ya black ass down ..simp

adieora:
The answer is no, however you won't be getting PR in the next 5 to 7years because she is on a student visa. She has to get a work/care visa to be eligible for PR which takes about 5 years to get. If you are concerned, you should aim to get a care worker or a skilled worker visa,that way you are independent of her visa.

You sound like you are in the UK....

And what da hell is own your profile? Gross!!!

luminouz:

Jaxxy go and sit ya black ass down ..simp

dude ure back. always on the other side of the argument and calling names ..Lolz

Kingpele:
Deep ....I see alot of childish comments and am confuse how people will still bring personal stuff here...however my brother ,my advise is for u to give yourselves chance to adapt to your new environment...selfishness and greed is not good at all for marriage .....you only wanted to lay low so as to get paper next year common that's selfishness....u should take it easy and sake ways to earn respect and trust from your wife ...with it u could build lasting union even in Uk

Bross U are talking like a true Nigerian who at any problem. Start praying and having faith even wen the Good book says faith without work is dead. No time to check time here in the UK. All what people are telling this brother is to get back up so that if things go left he has another life. Things that make people not to say good morning in Nigeria down here leads to leave your own house or police get called.

adieora:
The answer is no, however you won't be getting PR in the next 5 to 7years because she is on a student visa. She has to get a work/care visa to be eligible for PR which takes about 5 years to get. If you are concerned, you should aim to get a care worker or a skilled worker visa,that way you are independent of her visa.

AkA COS.

Another emasculated man has created a post with twisted facts to engineer the type of responses he wants for his "marriage".

cococandy:
The story keeps changing

Yes Madam. You are definitely right. No doubts at all.

It is typical with “dem say”, “him say” and “she say” gists.

You are absolutely correct. We usually never know the entire story.

[quote author=Ahmed0336 post=127631505]I was discussing with my wife the other day and she brought the issue of relocating.
I told her I don't have plans to leave so she can go ahead. But as for the kids, they'd definitely leave this country when the time is right.
No be me woman go show shege for another man's land


My wife has also been on the japa issue, I no wan go commit suicide or murder for that way, if she wants to go, the lord is her strength. My children are the only japa candidates when the time is right.

joebeckz:
Firstly, no amount of magic will give you paper next year. You don't need to exaggerate to get quick solutions cos we have good knowledge of student pathways even for In-demand professions. Except you are switching Visa type to COS or it's like. That being said.

You should double your efforts to make more money at the moment.
Your wife can't do anything now cos the hours she is getting for work won't sustain her should she chase you out of the UK.
She needs you at the moment to survive UK bills but might have plans to deal with you when the time is right. Therefore do not relent also.
Save for that time.
Look for a pathway that will make you independent.
Look for good direct streams of COS.


MUST DO
Get a USA visa
Get a Canadian visa
Get other visas. (NOTE You will be granted these tourist visas easily from UK cos of your status)

Why do you need these Visas?
You will need them should the need arise.
If she decides kicks you out.
Fall back to Canada or USA via student route or other pathways.
All you need to do is fly into these countries with your visa, look for a school and apply for a certificate program of one year and and migrate legitimately using the various streams available for students.
Therefore do these things quietly.


Don't forget to be a good husband to your wife.
Some women have seen shege from Nigerian men and when they get to societies that have their interest at heart. The quest for revenge sets in.

OP.
WHERE YOU A GOOD HUSBAND BACK IN NIGERIA?

Why didn't you ask the last question first?

Scheming man uses wife to get into the UK, then publicly plans on how to dump her and get a new wife, the one he's always wanted and had to jilt for this meal ticket.

Dear Nairaland people.
Whenever a man or woman brings family issues here, don't treat it like it's some biscuits.

Think deeply, put yourself in their shoe, their kids before you comment.

I'm afraid women always take advantage of anything, is in their DNA

jaxxy:


dude ure back. always on the other side of the argument and calling names ..Lolz

Lmaooo...I love you bro....happy holidays!!!

luminouz:


Lmaooo...I love you bro....happy holidays!!!

Love and respect. Happy hols.

Cutehector:
Why 9ja men dey knowingly put themselves in a situation to die before their time.


The only time i'd take my family abroad is when my wife is all grown up and nobody is looking at her again.

You probably did not read it well. Did you see the part where he said his wife came to the UK before him and the his wife is the main applicant?

Harddiskng:


Lol You are assuming that her new UK lover no get job. Wrong assumption Nigerian women mostly tend to lean towards a higher bidder.

It's rare to find one that doesn’t

-Which UK lover will accept a woman, without permanent residency, carrying 3 kids? Lol. Na her puccy go hear am.

-Single women never see lover na woman with THREE kids. Mtchew!

Bentoli:

You probably did not read it well. Did you see the part where he said his wife came to the UK before him and the his wife is the main applicant?

you probably also did not read my comment well too. I am talking about myself..what i will do in terms of japa..who cares what transpired with the op and his wife.. Mchew.

U will be send back home.. that's for sure..

soetantaiwo:
U will be send back home.. that's for sure..

Hahaha. Brother calm down naaa

ValCon888:
I'm interested in the red flags, please do tell.
It's possible that you left her totô like a stream.

But when you got to the UK it was wider than the Atlantic ocean and deeper than the Kola Superdeep Borehole.

I thought as much

soetantaiwo:
U will be send back home.. that's for sure..

enemy of progress

omowhich kind wahala be this, person go dey fear make him wife no throw am outNo matter what happens, don't leave Godomowhich kind wahala be this, person go dey fear make him wife no throw am outNo matter what happens, don't leave God...

I understood everything he said. Yet, I understand nothing is impossible ! The marriage could still work if the husband try his best to understand the reason for her sudden change and talk it out with her, hence my reason for asking him to make peace as the first resolution. Then if that fails, man should man up and start building his alternative move in case the unprepared happens to him.

Obviously you can’t just leave a marriage because one party is giving unpleasant body language, u still need to understand the reason for their action and see how to make things work. But then, don’t get caught off track in case every approach fails. Prepare for the worst even as you try to make things work.

luminouz:


Y'all still not reading right

Which one is make peace with her? Was he fighting with her? You lots still don't get it...once a woman wants you gone, nothing you do pacifies her!!! You are a goner. I prefer his approach. Build in secret and shock your shocker when the time comes

Notfogotten:
Please I have a question to ask.

I don't want to go into details so my partner doesn't trace this to me.

My partner came to UK before me, though still on student visa. I joined her with my 3 children one months ago.

I have noticed some red flags which never happened while we where in Nigeria and I was footing the bills alone.

Each red flag, I pretend nothing happened because I don't want to be thrown out like the man I read about on social media.

My visa is dependent on hers and we are still on student visa.

My question, in the event that we get papers to stay permanently in UK and one day she decides to send me packing or I decide move out, will I be asked to return to Nigeria because she is the main applicant?

Please I need urgent answers. I may not play the fool for long. We are very certain of getting papers next year.

It depends if you beat her up and she sues you and refuses to back down you are finished. You will first go to Jail then your documents will be revoked and then you will be asked to go back to Nigeria to take a chill.

You wise bro! Sense🧠 no go ever leave you

Japa no be rushing things, follow your mind and go when time's right

Even Tinubu no fit push me to run away

Ahmed0336:
I was discussing with my wife the other day and she brought the issue of relocating.
I told her I don't have plans to leave so she can go ahead. But as for the kids, they'd definitely leave this country when the time is right.
No be me woman go show shege for another man's land

Ahmed0336:
I was discussing with my wife the other day and she brought the issue of relocating.
I told her I don't have plans to leave so she can go ahead. But as for the kids, they'd definitely leave this country when the time is right.
No be me woman go show shege for another man's land

Sodiki! Even for here self(naija), Dem dey show us shege not to talk of getting to those countries that empower them to uped their shege to pro max

PDJT:


-Which UK lover will accept a woman, without permanent residency, carrying 3 kids? Lol. Na her puccy go hear am.

-Single women never see lover na woman with THREE kids. Mtchew!

They no dey tell person. you know how some women think, the guy has started showing her with gifts, cash and better nacks in her little mind; he is better than her husband but you and I already know it would end in premium tears and regret